Begin Again
Chapter 1
*5 years ago*
Prolouge:
"Jon," I sputtered out, starting to run out after him. "You didn't mean that."
I had just realized what he had said to me, and it hit me like a hard slap in the face that I had felt from him many times before.
"Jon!" I screamed. I ran out after him in the pouring rain, freezing my ass off, wearing nothing but a tank top and short shorts.
He kept walking, head down, hands in pockets, as if I, as if we, meant nothing. He could care less about us. I managed to catch up to him, breathing heavily and turned him around.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" I shoved him against the wall and he slapped my hands away.
" I fucking love you Jon why are you-" He pushed me away. "I don't want you Steph."
I felt so sick, dizzy, like i was about to faint.
"You-you don't mean that. I know you don't." I protested.
He threw his head back, annoyed at me, and leaned down to talk to me.
"You. Are. Worthless." He spat. "Nothing but an object. A little cunt, that's what you are. I never loved you, only stuck around for the sex."
I started to cry, why was he acting this way?
"But no, you didn't want it to be all about sex did you? No of course not, that would be to easy."
I started to sob, "Stop.." I moaned.
"You wanted to meet the parents, " He continued, "Have a life together."
I turned away so I didn't have to look at him.
"Well guess what sweetheart," He grabbed my face harshly and turned it torwards him. His face inches from mine. "You'll never have to worry about that again. You have three days to get all of your shit out of my apartment, then you'll be living on the streets again, suckin' dicks for money. Cause thats the only thing you're good for."
I spat in his face. Then it all happened so fast. Next thing I knew I was on the ground, he was kicking me in the stomach and i screamed. He punched my face to shut me up and proceeded to squeeze my throat. I kicked and gasped, tying desperatley to breathe. I felt so lightheaded. I remember seeing the neighbors light go on, and Jon sprinting away, then everything went black.
I woke up in a strange apartment, in a strange bed and covered in strange blankets.
My head was throbbing and my stomach was sore. I could feel that my face was starting a bruise some were and my mouth tasted like blood.
I looked around and saw a girl sitting in a polka dot beanbag chair, eating chinese food out of one of those paper boxes, watching her television that was proped up on her dresser. She wore a black tank top with grey sweatpants, her curly hair pulled back into a loose bun on the top of her head, she had dark eyes and tanned skin, she looked very muscular and had piercings up her entire ear.
The entire situation was extremely awkward for me. I tried to sit up, but let out a small cry because my head hit the..ceiling? I looked up and realized I was in the lower bunk of a bunk bed.
The girl, who looked about 15, my age, looked over suddenly. She had a suprised look on her face and quickly placed her chinese down on the carpeted floor. "Oh hello," She said with a perfect smile. " I didn't expect you to be up this early." She walked over and sat down besides me on the bed.
"How are you feeling?" I just then realized that I did not know this girl, and I was in her bed and she was talking to me.
"Who are you..?" I asked, rubbing my head and leaning away from her.
"Oh, I should've introduced myself! I'm sorry! you must be so uncomfortable." She held out her hand. " I'm Erika. Erika Ross."
I looked at her hand, then back at her face. "Okay Erika, if you mind me asking, how did I end up here..in your house and shit?"
She threw back her head and laughed. I kept a straight face, not noticing the humor in this situation.
"I live a few blocks over," Erika explained." I saw you laying under the street light in the rain through my window, figured you might need a place to stay." She shrugged. I just looked at her.
"Wow, um..thanks. Thanks alot actually. I'm Steph. " She smiled at me. "No problamo." She analyzed my face.
"So what happened?" She asked. I sighed. I barely knew this girl but she basically saved my life, I should trust her.
" Well, my boyfriend and I, well ex-boyfriend now I suppose." I bit my lip. "Got in a fight. A really bad fight. He's always been abusive, but I stayed with him because If i didn't I'd be living in the streets again."
"Why would you be living in the streets?" Erika interupted.
"Because," I explained. "I ran away from my parents. My mother was a druggie and my father was a drunk. Plain and simple." I shrugged. Erika looked at my sympathetically. I continued.
"Well anyway, all he wanted was sex. He would abuse me into it, make me feel bad for not 'satisfying' him or whatever. He's slipped things in my drinks before, probably raped me a couple times, I'm not even sure. I don't even remember half of what he's done to me. But then the abuse got physical..."
A tear rolled down my cheek; I bit my lip and erika pulled me into a giant bear hug.
"Oh, sweetie." She cooed. I sobbed into her shoulder. It was nice to have someone care for once. She rubbed my back and stroked my hair.
"He paid for me to go to school! Now what am I supposed to do?" I cried. Erika pulled back. "You can stay with me and my Aunt. She's 20 and I've lived with her since my parents died two years ago. She's a magazine editor she can afford it."I was shocked but I wiped my eyes and shook my head, "No, I couldn't ask you to do that." I sniffed. Erika put her hand on my shoulder and stared at me, complete seriousness on her face. "Steph, I know I just met you and may not know much about you, but I know this: I am not letting you back on the streets or anywhere near that manipulative asshole. You are staying here with me."
And with that, I didn't protest any longer. I had found someone, a friend, who cared for me and supported me and was always there for me. And I couldn't possibly have asked for more.
Prolouge:
"Jon," I sputtered out, starting to run out after him. "You didn't mean that."
I had just realized what he had said to me, and it hit me like a hard slap in the face that I had felt from him many times before.
"Jon!" I screamed. I ran out after him in the pouring rain, freezing my ass off, wearing nothing but a tank top and short shorts.
He kept walking, head down, hands in pockets, as if I, as if we, meant nothing. He could care less about us. I managed to catch up to him, breathing heavily and turned him around.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" I shoved him against the wall and he slapped my hands away.
" I fucking love you Jon why are you-" He pushed me away. "I don't want you Steph."
I felt so sick, dizzy, like i was about to faint.
"You-you don't mean that. I know you don't." I protested.
He threw his head back, annoyed at me, and leaned down to talk to me.
"You. Are. Worthless." He spat. "Nothing but an object. A little cunt, that's what you are. I never loved you, only stuck around for the sex."
I started to cry, why was he acting this way?
"But no, you didn't want it to be all about sex did you? No of course not, that would be to easy."
I started to sob, "Stop.." I moaned.
"You wanted to meet the parents, " He continued, "Have a life together."
I turned away so I didn't have to look at him.
"Well guess what sweetheart," He grabbed my face harshly and turned it torwards him. His face inches from mine. "You'll never have to worry about that again. You have three days to get all of your shit out of my apartment, then you'll be living on the streets again, suckin' dicks for money. Cause thats the only thing you're good for."
I spat in his face. Then it all happened so fast. Next thing I knew I was on the ground, he was kicking me in the stomach and i screamed. He punched my face to shut me up and proceeded to squeeze my throat. I kicked and gasped, tying desperatley to breathe. I felt so lightheaded. I remember seeing the neighbors light go on, and Jon sprinting away, then everything went black.
I woke up in a strange apartment, in a strange bed and covered in strange blankets.
My head was throbbing and my stomach was sore. I could feel that my face was starting a bruise some were and my mouth tasted like blood.
I looked around and saw a girl sitting in a polka dot beanbag chair, eating chinese food out of one of those paper boxes, watching her television that was proped up on her dresser. She wore a black tank top with grey sweatpants, her curly hair pulled back into a loose bun on the top of her head, she had dark eyes and tanned skin, she looked very muscular and had piercings up her entire ear.
The entire situation was extremely awkward for me. I tried to sit up, but let out a small cry because my head hit the..ceiling? I looked up and realized I was in the lower bunk of a bunk bed.
The girl, who looked about 15, my age, looked over suddenly. She had a suprised look on her face and quickly placed her chinese down on the carpeted floor. "Oh hello," She said with a perfect smile. " I didn't expect you to be up this early." She walked over and sat down besides me on the bed.
"How are you feeling?" I just then realized that I did not know this girl, and I was in her bed and she was talking to me.
"Who are you..?" I asked, rubbing my head and leaning away from her.
"Oh, I should've introduced myself! I'm sorry! you must be so uncomfortable." She held out her hand. " I'm Erika. Erika Ross."
I looked at her hand, then back at her face. "Okay Erika, if you mind me asking, how did I end up here..in your house and shit?"
She threw back her head and laughed. I kept a straight face, not noticing the humor in this situation.
"I live a few blocks over," Erika explained." I saw you laying under the street light in the rain through my window, figured you might need a place to stay." She shrugged. I just looked at her.
"Wow, um..thanks. Thanks alot actually. I'm Steph. " She smiled at me. "No problamo." She analyzed my face.
"So what happened?" She asked. I sighed. I barely knew this girl but she basically saved my life, I should trust her.
" Well, my boyfriend and I, well ex-boyfriend now I suppose." I bit my lip. "Got in a fight. A really bad fight. He's always been abusive, but I stayed with him because If i didn't I'd be living in the streets again."
"Why would you be living in the streets?" Erika interupted.
"Because," I explained. "I ran away from my parents. My mother was a druggie and my father was a drunk. Plain and simple." I shrugged. Erika looked at my sympathetically. I continued.
"Well anyway, all he wanted was sex. He would abuse me into it, make me feel bad for not 'satisfying' him or whatever. He's slipped things in my drinks before, probably raped me a couple times, I'm not even sure. I don't even remember half of what he's done to me. But then the abuse got physical..."
A tear rolled down my cheek; I bit my lip and erika pulled me into a giant bear hug.
"Oh, sweetie." She cooed. I sobbed into her shoulder. It was nice to have someone care for once. She rubbed my back and stroked my hair.
"He paid for me to go to school! Now what am I supposed to do?" I cried. Erika pulled back. "You can stay with me and my Aunt. She's 20 and I've lived with her since my parents died two years ago. She's a magazine editor she can afford it."I was shocked but I wiped my eyes and shook my head, "No, I couldn't ask you to do that." I sniffed. Erika put her hand on my shoulder and stared at me, complete seriousness on her face. "Steph, I know I just met you and may not know much about you, but I know this: I am not letting you back on the streets or anywhere near that manipulative asshole. You are staying here with me."
And with that, I didn't protest any longer. I had found someone, a friend, who cared for me and supported me and was always there for me. And I couldn't possibly have asked for more.
8/5/13