A Summer to Remember
7
All that was repeating in my head was the last sentence I said to myself. Who knows if I’m psychic or not but all I know is that I’m going to be strong and get her back, somehow, whatever it takes. The only reason that has been popping up in my head so much is because I’ve been practicing my song that I wanted to sing to Natalie. But after texting Natalie one day I found out that “The Crow and the Butterfly” was the song they danced to at their wedding. That just sounds like a bad idea. So I’ve been trying to come up with a better song but I just couldn’t think of it. But for some reason that little phrase whatever it takes just sounds so right. So I did the easy thing and went on youtube and searched it.
The first videos that came up were from a band called Lifehouse. Perfect, I said to myself. I clicked on the link and listened to the song.
I’ll do whatever it takes, to turn this around; I know what’s at stake. I know that I’ve let you down. So if you give me a chance, believe me I can change. I’ll keep us together whatever it takes.
This was perfect. I mean it wasn’t as great as the other song would’ve been but this is good too. So step two was to go online and download the guitar music. I took the guitar out of its case and locked the door and practiced. If this was going to be my last shot at Natalie I was going to take it. Hopefully when I sing it to her she won’t care that my voice sucks or that I’m not the best at guitar, but actually listens to the lyrics that I sincerely mean it will make all the difference.
A couple hours after practicing so much I lay on my bed staring up at the ceiling. The fan spins and like I did when I was little I stared at one of the blades and watched it until my eyes blurred. The song lyrics were playing in my head and I liked it there. Tomorrow I was going to go and give Natalie the song to convince her that I was the right one for her and that Tyler needs to go back to Chicago where his architecture is. After thinking about how much I would punch Tyler’s face in again, I sat up and went downstairs for lunch. But to my surprise Jackie was sitting out there Indian style listening to my playing. “Uh, hi Jack.” I said stepping over her feet. “Pat, it sounded really beautiful.” She said with a faint smile. I rolled my eyes, I still thought about what I would do if this didn’t work.
“Yeah, well thanks Jackie, but I really don’t know if this is going to work out. Maybe I’m just paranoid and she really does love him.” Her mouth dropped open, “Are you kidding me? She is still so in love with you. She is just scared that it will end like last time.” “Like last time? she’s the one that ended it last ti—wait, how do you know that?” I watched her eyes as they bounced across the walls trying to escape my gaze. “Well,” she hesitated, “I’ve been texting her.” She shrugged her shoulders. “So she knows all about this?” I said raising my voice. “No! Not exactly! She doesn’t know about the song but she does know how much you still love her.” I took a deep breath and lowered the volume of my voice. “Okay, fine. But you have to give me updates on how she is. Tomorrow I’m going to sing this song to her at the park where we used to hang out after school, wish me luck.”
<3<3<3<3<3<3
Natalie told me this morning that she would meet me there. She didn’t want to risk a potential fight with Tyler if she got caught with me. Not like it really mattered any ways considering we were just friends.
“Hey Pat, good afternoon.” She said with that pearly white smile of hers. “what’s with the guitar, I didn’t know you played.” I chuckled and brought it out as we sat on the bench underneath the cherry blossom tree. The pink flowers matched the light pink v-neck that went done to an appropriate level with her mother’s white pearls around her neck that I saw in the wedding pictures. “It’s a new hobby I’ve been trying and there’s just this one song that I’ve been practicing that I wanted you to hear.” I smiled and took a deep breath before beginning.
A strangled smile fell from your face
It kills me that I hurt you this way
The worst part is that I didn't even know
Now there's a million reasons for you to go
But if you can find a reason to stay
She looked a bit confused in the beginning. But she started to like it. I don’t know if it was just because I’m not the greatest singer or what because she was smiling. It gave me the confidence to continue when she brought her knees up to her chest.
I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
Believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes
I knew it when she started looking past my voice and started listening to the lyrics it was during this part of the song. Psh, of course it’s the chorus, that’s when the mushy stuff always happens. The smile stayed but a tear started to fall.
She said "If we're gonna make this work
You gotta let me inside even though it hurts
Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see"
She said "Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be
You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me"
The smile started to fade at this part. Because this was the line Like it or not it’s the way it’s gotta be, and I understand why. Because she said something like that to me before she left me.
I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
And give me a break
I'll keep us together, I know you deserve much better
That last line I truly meant it. I would do whatever it takes to stay with her. I never thought that I would be a guy that would get married or fall in love, but it happened. It took me too long to realize it and I’m on the verge of losing her. This was my last chance.
But remember the time I told you the way that I felt
That I'd be lost without you and never find myself
Let's hold onto each other above everything else
Start over, start over
The last time I told her I loved her was only a small while ago. I knew that I would always love her once I said it. And without her I was lost then, and I would probably be lost now if I didn’t have her. I want to hold on to her so much and never let her go. Her eyes started to really water now and I knew she knew what I was saying during all of this.
I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
and believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes
By now her makeup is running down her rosy cheeks. She bites her lips and wipes the black away. She is now speechless as I sit there, my chest pounding, my heart racing. And all I remember seeing is the corners of her lips turn upwards and she leans in without warning and kisses me. Not like last time though were it was a soft peck. This time it was a full out kiss that I’ve missed for at least 5 years. When she finally released all she said were the words, “I’ve missed you so much Pat.” I wrapped her in my secure arms and the tears almost fell from my eyes it was so great. I didn’t want it to end.
The first videos that came up were from a band called Lifehouse. Perfect, I said to myself. I clicked on the link and listened to the song.
I’ll do whatever it takes, to turn this around; I know what’s at stake. I know that I’ve let you down. So if you give me a chance, believe me I can change. I’ll keep us together whatever it takes.
This was perfect. I mean it wasn’t as great as the other song would’ve been but this is good too. So step two was to go online and download the guitar music. I took the guitar out of its case and locked the door and practiced. If this was going to be my last shot at Natalie I was going to take it. Hopefully when I sing it to her she won’t care that my voice sucks or that I’m not the best at guitar, but actually listens to the lyrics that I sincerely mean it will make all the difference.
A couple hours after practicing so much I lay on my bed staring up at the ceiling. The fan spins and like I did when I was little I stared at one of the blades and watched it until my eyes blurred. The song lyrics were playing in my head and I liked it there. Tomorrow I was going to go and give Natalie the song to convince her that I was the right one for her and that Tyler needs to go back to Chicago where his architecture is. After thinking about how much I would punch Tyler’s face in again, I sat up and went downstairs for lunch. But to my surprise Jackie was sitting out there Indian style listening to my playing. “Uh, hi Jack.” I said stepping over her feet. “Pat, it sounded really beautiful.” She said with a faint smile. I rolled my eyes, I still thought about what I would do if this didn’t work.
“Yeah, well thanks Jackie, but I really don’t know if this is going to work out. Maybe I’m just paranoid and she really does love him.” Her mouth dropped open, “Are you kidding me? She is still so in love with you. She is just scared that it will end like last time.” “Like last time? she’s the one that ended it last ti—wait, how do you know that?” I watched her eyes as they bounced across the walls trying to escape my gaze. “Well,” she hesitated, “I’ve been texting her.” She shrugged her shoulders. “So she knows all about this?” I said raising my voice. “No! Not exactly! She doesn’t know about the song but she does know how much you still love her.” I took a deep breath and lowered the volume of my voice. “Okay, fine. But you have to give me updates on how she is. Tomorrow I’m going to sing this song to her at the park where we used to hang out after school, wish me luck.”
<3<3<3<3<3<3
Natalie told me this morning that she would meet me there. She didn’t want to risk a potential fight with Tyler if she got caught with me. Not like it really mattered any ways considering we were just friends.
“Hey Pat, good afternoon.” She said with that pearly white smile of hers. “what’s with the guitar, I didn’t know you played.” I chuckled and brought it out as we sat on the bench underneath the cherry blossom tree. The pink flowers matched the light pink v-neck that went done to an appropriate level with her mother’s white pearls around her neck that I saw in the wedding pictures. “It’s a new hobby I’ve been trying and there’s just this one song that I’ve been practicing that I wanted you to hear.” I smiled and took a deep breath before beginning.
A strangled smile fell from your face
It kills me that I hurt you this way
The worst part is that I didn't even know
Now there's a million reasons for you to go
But if you can find a reason to stay
She looked a bit confused in the beginning. But she started to like it. I don’t know if it was just because I’m not the greatest singer or what because she was smiling. It gave me the confidence to continue when she brought her knees up to her chest.
I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
Believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes
I knew it when she started looking past my voice and started listening to the lyrics it was during this part of the song. Psh, of course it’s the chorus, that’s when the mushy stuff always happens. The smile stayed but a tear started to fall.
She said "If we're gonna make this work
You gotta let me inside even though it hurts
Don't hide the broken parts that I need to see"
She said "Like it or not it's the way it's gotta be
You gotta love yourself if you can ever love me"
The smile started to fade at this part. Because this was the line Like it or not it’s the way it’s gotta be, and I understand why. Because she said something like that to me before she left me.
I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know that I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
And give me a break
I'll keep us together, I know you deserve much better
That last line I truly meant it. I would do whatever it takes to stay with her. I never thought that I would be a guy that would get married or fall in love, but it happened. It took me too long to realize it and I’m on the verge of losing her. This was my last chance.
But remember the time I told you the way that I felt
That I'd be lost without you and never find myself
Let's hold onto each other above everything else
Start over, start over
The last time I told her I loved her was only a small while ago. I knew that I would always love her once I said it. And without her I was lost then, and I would probably be lost now if I didn’t have her. I want to hold on to her so much and never let her go. Her eyes started to really water now and I knew she knew what I was saying during all of this.
I'll do whatever it takes
To turn this around
I know what's at stake
I know I've let you down
And if you give me a chance
and believe that I can change
I'll keep us together whatever it takes
By now her makeup is running down her rosy cheeks. She bites her lips and wipes the black away. She is now speechless as I sit there, my chest pounding, my heart racing. And all I remember seeing is the corners of her lips turn upwards and she leans in without warning and kisses me. Not like last time though were it was a soft peck. This time it was a full out kiss that I’ve missed for at least 5 years. When she finally released all she said were the words, “I’ve missed you so much Pat.” I wrapped her in my secure arms and the tears almost fell from my eyes it was so great. I didn’t want it to end.
