Dear Patrick
Letter Twenty-Nine
Monday, December 16, 2013
Dear Patrick,
I'm writing this quickly. It's because he's still not back yet. It's been a while. It's getting dark out. I'm upstairs, Patty, I'm upstairs. But this isn't my house. I don't know where my house is. I don't know whose house this is. It isn't Adam's. Adam's house doesn't look like this. I can hear Adam, though. I can hear him yelling from upstairs. I think something's happening to him but I don't have the strength to make it up the stairs. I feel like he's in the attic or something. The guy's car isn't here so I figured he left. I yelled through the heat vents to see if Adam could hear me. He did. He yelled back. He was crying so hard. He asked me to help him.
I was so torn, Pat. I told him I couldn't. I was crying so hard he barely understood me. I told him, "I'm so sorry Adam I can't." I heard him cry and whimper. Adam. Crying. The best wide receiver in the whole state. I can't even imagine what's happening to him. I told him I want to so bad but I won't be able to make it up the stairs. My legs are all scratched, Pat. I can't stand straight. But me and Adam- we're going to be okay. I know.
We're going to be just as okay as me and you ended up being when we got into a car accident on our way back from that "road trip". It was after you sang Every Breath You Take to me. It was before everything- before I liked you like this and before you liked me like this- if you still do. I don't even know why the guy's been keeping all these letters. He has to be a creep. There has to be something. But when he comes back, I'm going to get him. I don't give a fuck. He was the reason the little girl got killed. He pushed me. I fell onto her because of him. I didn't mean to, I swear. I would never, I loved her, I swear. I can't wait until I see you so I can tell you all about her.
When I tell you who she is, you're going to fall for her, too. I swear. When I tell you all about her and how amazing she's going to be when she grows up, you're going to wish you met her. She's the only reason I'm alive- she and Adam. But she's my emotional source of life. I haven't been drugged in a couple days. I feel better. I feel stronger. I'm coming. I'm bringing this box of letters and I'm coming.
I'm going to bring Adam with me. I won't leave without him, though. My plan is fool-proof, Patrick. I swear. I can't wait until I see you. I'm going to hug you for so long. So freaking long. And you're not allowed to let go until I finish crying. You're not allowed to do so much as move an inch until I finish telling you about the girl. Okay? I love you, Kaner. I'll see you soon, I promise.
Love
Lana
Dear Patrick,
I'm writing this quickly. It's because he's still not back yet. It's been a while. It's getting dark out. I'm upstairs, Patty, I'm upstairs. But this isn't my house. I don't know where my house is. I don't know whose house this is. It isn't Adam's. Adam's house doesn't look like this. I can hear Adam, though. I can hear him yelling from upstairs. I think something's happening to him but I don't have the strength to make it up the stairs. I feel like he's in the attic or something. The guy's car isn't here so I figured he left. I yelled through the heat vents to see if Adam could hear me. He did. He yelled back. He was crying so hard. He asked me to help him.
I was so torn, Pat. I told him I couldn't. I was crying so hard he barely understood me. I told him, "I'm so sorry Adam I can't." I heard him cry and whimper. Adam. Crying. The best wide receiver in the whole state. I can't even imagine what's happening to him. I told him I want to so bad but I won't be able to make it up the stairs. My legs are all scratched, Pat. I can't stand straight. But me and Adam- we're going to be okay. I know.
We're going to be just as okay as me and you ended up being when we got into a car accident on our way back from that "road trip". It was after you sang Every Breath You Take to me. It was before everything- before I liked you like this and before you liked me like this- if you still do. I don't even know why the guy's been keeping all these letters. He has to be a creep. There has to be something. But when he comes back, I'm going to get him. I don't give a fuck. He was the reason the little girl got killed. He pushed me. I fell onto her because of him. I didn't mean to, I swear. I would never, I loved her, I swear. I can't wait until I see you so I can tell you all about her.
When I tell you who she is, you're going to fall for her, too. I swear. When I tell you all about her and how amazing she's going to be when she grows up, you're going to wish you met her. She's the only reason I'm alive- she and Adam. But she's my emotional source of life. I haven't been drugged in a couple days. I feel better. I feel stronger. I'm coming. I'm bringing this box of letters and I'm coming.
I'm going to bring Adam with me. I won't leave without him, though. My plan is fool-proof, Patrick. I swear. I can't wait until I see you. I'm going to hug you for so long. So freaking long. And you're not allowed to let go until I finish crying. You're not allowed to do so much as move an inch until I finish telling you about the girl. Okay? I love you, Kaner. I'll see you soon, I promise.
Love
Lana
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