Viktor took her hand in his. He felt the same way as Abby. It would be good for Jane to talk about what had happened, but it wouldn’t be easy or her. He could see it in her eyes, feel it in the way she squeezed his hand.
“I was still a kid when it started.” Jane took a deep breath and started playing with his fingers, watching their intertwined hands. It was good to focus on something. If she closed her eyes now, she’d remember what had happened more vividly, and she’d probably start to cry. That was one thing she didn’t want to do today.
“I was still a kid when it all started and I thought that I deserved everything that happened to me. My father got drunk every weekend, and that’s how it started. He slapped me across the face numerous times. Because I’d left a spoon on the table or hadn’t put my shoes next to the ones in the hall. I learned from that, though. That went on for weeks and I was walking on eggshells when I was home. I tried not to leave anything lying around, tidied up after myself and all that stuff.
Once I had kind of adapted to the situation, his behavior changed. He still got home drunk at the weekends, but he made me responsible for every little thing and started hitting me without any reason. When he got bored with just hitting me, he took a knife and started cutting my thighs where nobody would see it.”
No, she would not cry. She would NOT cry. Viktor felt her tremble and pulled her even closer. He let go of her hand and ran his hands up and down her back. He pulled her up to give her a kiss, signaling her with his eyes that it was okay.
“He told me that I deserved this. I wasn’t a good daughter and I didn’t do what he demanded from me. I was punished for every little thing. And if there wasn’t anything, he would make up reasons to punish me. To cut my legs, my stomach. He broke my arm once. I had a fractured rib, a dislocated shoulder, but there was nothing anybody could have done. My Mother was very convincing when she had to take me to the hospital. She said that we’d been playing football with kids from the neighborhood. They believed her.”
She still remembered the look on her mother’s face. She’d looked so concerned and worried for her. It has been disgusting. But Jane hadn’t had the courage to tell anybody the truth. Nobody would have believed her and that would only have ended in more pain, more cuts and maybe even broken bones.
“I’m sorry you had to go through this, and I’m sorry that your mother didn’t protect you. She should have done that.” Viktor ran a hand through her hair and peered down at her face. Tears were brimming in her eyes, and he could see that she was trying very hard not to let them fall. If she started crying now, she probably wouldn’t stop, but Viktor didn’t have a problem with that. He’d always known that there was more to her tough exterior, but this was heartbreaking.
“I think she was scared that he might lash out at her as well then. It was easier for her to stand by and watch instead of stepping in front of me.”
“That’s not the point. She’s your mother and she should try to protect you from all the bad things. Take you and run away, get help from someone. But staying there, standing by when your own father abused you… I just can’t understand this kind of behavior. You were just a little girl and nobody was there to protect you.” Viktor shook his head. Unbelievable. He’d already thought that her past must not have been great, but this was shocking.
“My grandma took me in. She rescued me from my father and he ended up in jail, though I think he’ll be out soon. I don’t know and I don’t care. I don’t want anything to do with him anymore. If it weren’t for my grandma, I wouldn’t be here anymore.”
Jane slowly sat up and turned her back to Viktor. She pulled her hair away so that he could see the scars on her back. There were small ones, bigger ones and one that was really big right next, and partly on her shoulder blade.
“One day my father pushed me through the glass door when I was inside to get something to drink. It was a hot summer day and we’d been outside in the pool. I was only wearing a bikini and landed with my back on the shattered glass. There was one really big piece and that’s how I got these scars. My mother called the ambulance right away.” Jane slowly turned to face him again. “I had to stay at the hospital for a couple of days. They thought that they’d have to operate me, but luckily they didn’t. While I was there, they saw all the other scars and my grandma came to visit me. She talked to the doc for a long time and after my stay at the hospital I went home with her. She literally saved my life.”
“You miss her, don’t you?”
That was when Jane couldn’t hold her tears back anymore. She nodded and let the tears stream down her face. She bit down on her bottom lip hard, but immediately relaxed, when Viktor sat up and pulled her in his arms. He brushed away her tears and looked in her eyes.
“Your Grandma loved you very much, Jane.” He pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. “You’re an amazing woman. I’m sorry you had to live through all this, but you’re safe now. You’re so strong, so beautiful and it’s a pleasure to know you.”
“Oh God,” Jane mumbled and closed her eyes. “This will only make me cry more.”
“I don’t care. I think you need to hear this, to realize it.” Viktor cupped her face in his hands. “You have a lot of people around you who care about you and who will protect you. Believe me, Patrick and I will fight everyone who wants to harm you.”
“You, too?” Jane looked at him in surprise.
“Of course.” He kissed her nose and smiled at her. “Your behavior in the supermarket makes even more sense now. I was surprised when you stepped up and protected that child. You were very impressive. Not everyone would have done that. you’ve got balls girl.”
That made her laugh and bury her face in his chest.
“Hey, at least I made you laugh.” Viktor put his hands in her back, feeling the scars beneath his fingers. “Thank you for telling me this, Jane.”
“Thank you for listening without judging me.”
Viktor didn’t know why anyone would judge her, but she’d probably experienced it before. Otherwise she wouldn’t have mentioned it.