“Sid stop!” I yelled.

“Make me, Casey.” Sidney said.

“Make you? Oh I’ll make you.” I said.

I knew how I’d make Sidney stop tickling me, it wasn’t that hard. All I had to say was Sidney you’re the most amazing man in this world and I’m madly in love with you.

“Then, say it, come on.” He said.

“Sidney you’re the-” I couldn’t go on.

Oh boy, this was going to be a tough one that’s for sure. I used to be able to tell Sidney that before with no problem without really meaning it, but now that was a whole different story. I did think that Sidney was the most amazing man in this world and I was madly in love with him. I could never let him know though; I knew he didn’t love me it was pretty clear that he didn’t. I would always be his best friend and nothing more, and I know I shouldn’t expect to be more, yet sometimes I do.

“Casey, you better tell me or I’m not going to stop tickling you.” He said.

I didn’t say anything I just looked at him and blushed. Every time I looked into his eyes I’d get all these awesome and sometimes a little sad flashbacks.

****
“Casey, Sidney come on supper’s ready!” My mom yelled.

“Fine mom, we’ll be there.” I said.

“So I’m eating over again, eh?” He said.

“Yea, do you not like eating over?” I asked.

“Oh no, no I love eating over your house we get to spend more time together.” He said.

“Oh goody, we’re having Chinese tonight, kind of special just for you.” I said.

“Oh Casey, why are you guys doing this for me, your mom is too nice, it’s my favorite!” He said.

“Yea, and my mom bought a special dessert too, she bought cheesecake!” I yelled.

“Oh wow Casey, why so special for me?” He asked.

“I begged my mom to make you eat over and she said when she had the money to get Chinese then yea and she finally got it” I said.

“Yea, well you’re mom is the best! I love her!! Almost as much as I love you Casey.” He said.

“You love me Sid?” I asked.

“Yes, I love you Casey. Can I kiss you?” He asked.

“Umm, Sidney, don’t boys have cooties.” I said.

“I’m special aren’t I?” He asked.

“Yes, you are.” I said.

“Exactly, so that means I don’t have cooties. Can I kiss you?” He asked.

“Hmm, okay you can kiss me, but make it quick!” I said.

“Oh Casey,” He said.

He leaned in and gave me a really cute and soft kiss. It was really enjoyable!

“Sidney, thank you.” I said.

“Welcome Casey.” He said.

“He he let’s go inside” I said.

We went inside and of course Sid and I sat next to each other like we always did. Everyone kept telling us we’d make the perfect couple in the entire world, funny thing is I’m ten and he’s eleven. Isn’t it a little early to play match maker?

***

“And I’m still tickling you, are you going to say it?” He asked.

“YESS!!!!” I yelled.

“Sidney you’re the most amazing man I know and I’m madly in love with you.” I said with more emotion then I thought I would.

I wasn’t sure what to do at this moment in time, should I stay or should I go? Really, I was totally unsure. I never really meant it before but now I really did. Ok., so I’d be lying if I said I didn’t mean it at all. I did mean it before too but now the feelings have escalated a whole lot.

“Casey what’s wrong?” He asked.

That was the problem with Sidney and I being best friends he knew the second something was wrong. There was no way I could hide it.

“I’m fine Sid.” I said.

“Casey, no you’re not what’s wrong?” He asked.

“Seriously Sidney it’s no big deal it’s nothing really.” I said.

“Tell me!” He said while raising his voice.

“Sidney I said NO!” I yelled.

“Why not huh?! You tell me everything Casey what is it this time, another abusive boyfriend you don’t plan on telling me about. Casey if you don’t tell me now it might be too late!” He yelled.

*Sidney*

I knew there was something bothering Casey right now, she wasn’t being herself. She always so happy and bubbly and now she seemed so down and sad.

I can’t believe I yelled like that at her though, I’ve never done that before ever. I always spoke to her calmly and got what she had to say. This side of me never came out of me when I was with Casey.

But, as bad as I felt, I knew she was hiding something really important from me. I was always worried and concerned about her. But I was a lot more worried lately. Why? Casey went through a whole lot of boyfriends, that’s why. Besides the jealousy that took over when they were around. What got me mad the most was that they were never the right guy for her. They were all jerks and hurt her all the time.

But what pushed me over the edge was about a month ago.

***
I had finally got to Casey’s house, for a surprise visit. It had been a while since she saw me and I missed her. I wanted to see her beautiful face and the gorgeous reaction on her face when she saw me. Truth is, I’m in love with my best friend and she doesn’t know it.

When I got there I noticed that the door was slightly open, that’s odd Casey always locks her doors. But, I guess I shouldn’t make much of it. So, I decided to go inside and see what was going on.

“Casey?” I called.

She didn’t answer, that was odd she always answered to my voice.

“Casey?” I called again.

Still nothing, so I decided to keep walking in, as I neared her bedroom I was hearing screams. My heart was crushed, because I couldn’t tell if they were screams or moans coming from her.

The door was slightly opened and what I saw mortified me. She most defiantly wasn’t moaning, she was screaming, screaming for dear life.

“CASEY!” I yelled.

“Sidney, you’re- you’re here.” she said happily.

“Shut up bitch!” Her boyfriend yelled.

“Wait, you just called her a bitch?” I asked.

“Uh, yea she is, little missy here fucking tells me tonight’s the night and I get shit.” He spat.

“Casey, you really told him tonight was the night?” I asked heartbroken.

“No Sid, NEVER! I never said that Sid you believe me right? Sidney he came and he just-”

“Fuck I told you to shut up! You whore! You did tell me!!!” He said.

“No, no fucking way did she say that, Casey isn’t like that; why would she want lose it to a stupid fuck like you? I believe her 100% I don’t believe you for a second. Now, you better let her go.” I said.

“Oh yea…or what pretty boy, huh? Think you got something on me.” He said with a chuckle and kissed her lips.

“Fuck, you know people really underestimate my fighting abilities, so yea I do got something on you.” I said.

“You do huh? Well prove it Cindy.” He said and this time he licked Casey up her jaw line.

That was it; I thought I was going to kill him. I got up and grabbed him off of her, well more like a forceful yank. There was no way in hell that he was going to hurt Casey any more than he did.

When I took him off her, he was on the floor instantly. I didn’t waste any time at all, I got on him and I started punching him repeatedly. he was lucky I was being this nice with him. He deserved to be killed by me right now, he fucking touched her!

“Fuck!” He yelled.

“Still think I’ve got nothing on you?” I yelled.

“Fuck you! Can’t believe you think that little Miss slut-”

That pushed me even more overboard, I couldn’t believe he just called Casey; the love of my life a slut! No one I don’t care who the fuck they are, they don’t call Casey a slut!

“Excuse me?” I asked loudly.

“You heard me she’s a slut; need to spell it out for you Cry baby Crosby.” He said.

“By the time I’m done with you, you won’t even be able to speak.” I said.

“Sidney please, get off of him.” Casey said.

“Why should I huh?” I said.

“He’s not worth it, don’t hurt yourself over something like Me.” she said.

“Casey, something like you, I’ll always be here to protect you and please this bastard deserves what he’s going to get.” I said.

“Sid!” She yelled.

I didn’t care, he had to pay! I took him by the shirt and threw him against the wall and kicked him right smack in his balls. I’d show him what happens when he touches my girl!

“Oh fuck, I’m calling the cops!” He yelled.

“Oh sure, ‘cause you really want to tell the cops that you almost raped Casey and it’s your word against mine.” I said.

“So, they aren’t going to believe Cindy crybaby fagsby now will they?” He asked.

“Hmm, let me think, oh yea they will and umm they’ll believe Casey over you any day. So, I suggest you get of here and don’t ever even think about coming back.” I said.

With that he got up and walked right out of her room.

“Sidney, you- you saved me.” She said.

She warped her arms around me and gave me a light peck on the cheek. That made me like the happiest guy ever. Okay, so it might sound gay that I freaked over a peck on the cheek. But, I mean I’m in love with Casey all it takes it a slight touch to do it for me.

“Thanks, but I didn’t save you, I just protected you.” I said.

“You’re insane though you know that!” She yelled hitting me.

“What?! You honestly expect me to just sit there and watch the rape!” I said.

“When you put it that way…but what were you doing here anyway?” She asked.

“I wanted to come surprise you.” He said.

“Really, Sid?” She asked happily.

“Yea, really Casey,” I said.

I looked deeply into her eyes and they locked for what seemed to be a minute, but even though it was a short time, it felt like heaven.

****

I still regret yelling the way I did at her, but I needed to get this out of her!

“No Sidney it’s nothing like that this time. I promise you that much. I just can’t tell you because, because it’s just too risky.” She said.

“Oh Casey please, you know that nothing can be too risky when you’re with me.” I said.

“Sidney, trust me it is, this can change everything. I don’t want to lose you.” She said.

“You’re not going to lose me, ever, no matter what it is.” I said.

I needed her to believe me I did and the fact that she didn’t was hurting me too a little. I wish the reason she were hiding it would be because she really is madly in love with me. But I highly doubt that one.

“No Sidney, umm I just can’t, so please can you go now?” She asked.

“Huh, Casey we had plans a movie, going to get something to eat and hang out like we always do when I have the day off. I mean, if not today I won’t have another day off until like two weeks. I’m on a road trip next week I’ve got constant practices.” I said.

“Sid, like you said we do all the time when you have a day off. I mean, look Sidney things are just a little tough for me and I think it’d be best if you know we didn’t speak for a little while.” She said.

This killed me more so then her not telling me what she was hiding. She is basically canceling our plans. This sucks badly because, today I kind of had planned on telling her about my feelings and giving her this bracelet I bought her, simply because she was my best friend and because I loved her. Sadly, that isn’t going to happen, so once again I’m stuck not telling her how I feel.

“Casey, what’s gotten into you, like practically ten minutes ago we were laughing and you made me stop tickling you with that line. And now you want to cancel what we had planned. I mean, I guess I can go if you really want me to. How long is a little while?” I asked hurt.

“Well, I don’t know I’m just not in the mood anymore. Well, go on the road trip and when you get back I’ll see.” She said.

“Casey, no I always call you when I’m away on my road trips, I mean come on Casey you’re my good luck charm. ‘Member when I didn’t call you twice and I played horrible.” I said trying to lighten the mood a little.

“Sid, I’m sure that was just coincidence and I think it’s best for the both of us. Sid, I’ll still be watching you play though. Oh just don’t promise me any goals. I think our friendship needs to be put on hold for a while.” She said.

I wasn’t sure what I was supposed to do, should I stay or should I leave? I mean, I was truly pained by this. I really don’t know what got into her so suddenly. Our friendship on hold, what’s that all about? I can’t possibly put our friendship on hold, I’m in love with her.

“Casey, I can’t not promise you goals. I always have and I always will. I honestly don’t know what your reasoning is for putting this friendship on hold, but I can’t let you go Casey. You have no idea how much I care about you.” I said.

* Casey*

I honestly don’t know why I was being this way with him. He did absolutely nothing wrong. It’s two days before his road trip and endless practice and here I am being such a bitch and canceling all the plans. What’s wrong with me?! I’m fucking madly, head over heels in love with him and I’m acting this way. Damn, why am I so stupid? What was I suppose to say now? I just told him not to promise me any goal scores; I mean he always promises me at least one goal per game; if he scored two in one game it makes up in case he doesn’t score in the next one. Seriously though I’m such a flipping moron.

“Umm, Sidney I’m sorry I acted this way.” I said.

“Casey what’s up with you?” He asked.

“Honestly, I don’t know anymore Sidney I just don’t know.” I said.

“But, please I want to help you out, you know I do. I lo-” He said.

He froze and I thought he was going to say I love you. Then I thought that idea through and nope that can’t be it at all. He was probably going to say something else and decided that maybe it was totally irrelevant or something. (Well this is what I’m making myself believe.)

“You can’t help me with this one though.” I said.

“Why not?” He asked.

“I can’t tell you why not.” I said.

“Gosh, you’re never this hard headed or stubborn you tell me everything.” he said.

“This is just different, I guess you could say. Look, Sid umm maybe we can just hang out eat a little take out instead?” I offered.

“I get you’re trying to change the subject, but yea that’d be nice.” He said.

“How about oh I don’t know Chinese?” I asked.

“Oh damn right, seriously let’s order a ton!” He said.

“Umm, ok but why though? I questioned.

“Well, hmm, so I can bring some on my road trip!” He yelled.

“Wow Sid. Oh and speaking of the road trip let’s talk during it! I mean, I don’t think I could last that long without talking to you. Seeing as I’m in l-” I stopped dead in my tracks.

I can’t believe I almost let it slip out. Now, wasn’t the time to tell him at all, I wasn’t ready. I knew he didn’t feel the same way that I did. Although, I’d have to tell him eventually, or maybe I wouldn’t. He’d meet someone and he’d be happy with her and I’d meet someone too and be happy with him right?

Sure. Sidney has and always will be my first love. I fell in love with him at the age of fourteen and he was fifteen, but when I fell madly in love with him it was about six months ago. Yea, it took me a while to fall madly in love with him but I wanted to make sure it was real love I was feeling. I was always told that my tastes would change as I aged and shit like that.

But, when you find true love and your one love, your soul mate your tastes don’t change. Well I’d like to believe Sidney is my soul mate, but I know he won’t be ever. 1) he doesn’t feel the same way and 2) I never ever plan on confessing to him. It’d be too embarrassing.

***
“Hey Casey!” Sid yelled once I got out of school.

“Hey Sid what are you doing here?” I asked.

“Thought it would be nice if I came to pick you up. I wanted to do something with you today!” He said.

“Oh awesome!” I yelled and ran into his arms.

He caught me and lifted me off the ground as if I was as light as a feather. Oh, I loved being in his arms. He was so strong and I felt so safe inside them, he always protected me.

“So where are we going Sid?” I asked as he put me down.

“Well, it’s a surprise, but I know you’re going just love it!” He said and we got into his car.

Being there with him in his car just me and him was all I needed sometimes. Sure, I would get butterflies every time our hands would touch. Let me tell you it happened a whole lot.

His car finally came to a stop and I really had no idea where we were.

“Sid where are we?” I asked.

“The best place in the entire world!” He said.

“Oh Really now?” I asked.

“Yup, I come here all the time especially when I’m having a couple of down days. No one knows about it, but now you do and I want you to keep this a secret ok.” He said.

“Of course and that’s beautiful.” I said.

“Thanks, and yea…let’s go.” He said.

“Okay!” I yelled.

He grabbed my hand in his and walked me to the end of the field and there was such a nice view of the water beneath us. I felt so special that Sidney would actually share it with me.

“This is so beautiful.” I said.

“Yes, you really are.” He said.

It was then I realized that I really was in love with Sidney and that wasn’t going to change, not now and not ever.

***

“What teams are you playing exactly on the road trip Sid?” I asked.

“Well the trip starts out against: San Jose, LA, Anaheim, Boston, Carolina and then we get a lovely two day break of no games but sadly, we can’t hang out then.” He said.

“Oh that seems like a whole lot of games, but I’ll me watching you for sure you know that. Oh, well you can still drop by right?” I asked hopefully.

“Yea, it is and I promise to get you a Hat Trick in at least one game and I’ll score you a goal in every game expect maybe 1.oh and course I‘ll drop by!” he said.

“A lot of promises you’re making me, you better stick by ‘em all. If not, I won’t be very happy with you. Ok, good! I’ll miss you so much though Sidney, I will.” I said.

“I’ll miss you too Casey, more than you could ever imagine.” He said.

“Aw, Sid you’re great! Can’t I come with you?” I asked with a pout look on my face.

Usually, with Sidney if I gave him the pout look he’d get me whatever I wanted. But this time I knew I wasn’t getting what I wanted at all.

“Oh Casey I wish I could, I really, really want you there. But, you can’t come, not yet at least. Umm, but one day you’re coming with us okay promise you one day you’re coming with me.” He said.

“But why does Heather get to go sometimes or Tk’s girlfriend Oksana goes too even Marc Andre‘s girlfriend. Why them and not me, am I not good enough to come with you? Is that it? Are you waiting for me to lose weight because I’m not as skinny as them, do I need blond hair and like superbly large boobs or something? Is that why you’re not bringing me Sid?” I asked extremely hurt.

“What?! No, no Casey never, that’s not it, at all. Casey you’re insane to think that, you really are. Casey those aren’t the reasons I’m not taking you I promise. And you’re crazy to even think that! You’re perfect Casey perfect. You don’t need to lose weight what?! No, and plus I’d rather have a girl with some chubbiness then none at all. Your boobs Casey are perfectly fine, the perfect size, my hands can fit right around them. See-”

He placed both his hands over my breasts and gave them a light squeeze. God, not only did that feel amazing but it felt like Sidney really loved me. What about the whole wanting a girl with a little chubbiness over none at all? What was that all about?

I wasn't sure what my reaction to this would've been though. I mean Sidney never and I mean NEVER in all the years we've been friends, has he grabbed my boobs. I mean, this was just a little odd for me to be experiencing that's for sure. Not that I minded all that much. I liked the feeling actually, but I knew that to Sidney it meant nothing really. I felt a blush creep onto my cheeks and his cheeks as well. Oh, he was soo cute when he blushed! Now, that I realize it, his hands are still firmly holding onto them. I noticed that his hands started to move a little and he blushed a deeper red. Then, he finally noticed and let go. I had never seen him blush this much before but I have to say, I was really happy he was blushing this much because of me.

“And also, blond hair doesn’t automatically make me go for a girl. I mean I’ve always thought brown hair was nicer.” He added in a seductive whisper close to my ear.

“Umm Sid, I asked you if those were the reasons you didn’t take me on a road trip, not if I was your type of girl. But, am I?” I asked.

Sidney just blushed and didn’t say a word.

“How about we order take out, I’m really hungry.” He said.

“Sure, and now I can see you’re trying to change the subject. But, sure, let’s order I’m really hungry too.” I said.

We ordered a whole ton alright! We were two and Sidney decided to order food for eight. I was like whoa! That’s a little much, but he didn’t seem to think so.

“Umm Sid, how can we eat all this food?” I asked.

“Well, I mean we don’t have to eat all of it now. I want you to keep some too and I’ll be taking some with me. Oh and you know what we should do, take some and keep for when I come back home and then we can eat it!” He said.

“Yea. Sid come back home?” I asked.

“Yes Casey home!” He said.

“Sid, you don’t live here.” I said.

“Not technically but you kind of like have a ton of clothes that you’ve borrowed and never given back, which you can keep. I keep a ton of my equipment here and you have dedicated one side of the closet to my million and one suits. I’m here more so then I am at my house. So yes, I call this home.” He said.

“Well, never thought of it that way. Now that I think about it, it is home for you huh.” I said.

Gosh, how I wish that one day we’d get married and actually have a home together. I could only imagine what married life with Sidney would be like. Honestly, we get along so great and have so much in common but we do have our differences and I think we’d make such an awesome couple.

“Yea, it really is and one it will be my home won’t it?” He asked.

“What?” I asked.

“Nothing,” He said.

“Um no tell me.” I said.

“No it’s nothing actually.” He said.

“Well, I won’t try to get anything more out of you seeing as I want to enjoy this time with you.” I said.

“Yes and so do I.” He agreed.

We sat there and laughed and talked about basically anything, yes that does include some slight sexual talk. Consisting of what? You may ask. Well, we discussed you know casual and intense turn-on’s, definite turn offs. Things like that and our conversation did end up going into a whole lot more detail. But we’re best friends so why not?! I mean he did just grab by breasts a little earlier on in the day so I mean this was just making it all better for the both of us. Okay, enough about that.

“Casey can I sleep here with you tonight?” Sid asked.

“Umm sure,” I said.

“Are you sure though?” He asked.

“Yea, sure of course, I’ll never say no to you.. You can sleep here and it’d be fun.” I said.

“Yea, it would be and thanks.” He said.

“Well what time do you leave tomorrow?” I asked.

“Umm, let’s see I have to be at the airport by three in afternoon, seeing as we board the plane at about six thirty.” He said.

“So a entire night of movies and junk food is possible?” I asked.

“Hmm, I think so.” He said.

“YAY!” I shouted!

* Sidney *

Casey and I would make a perfect couple. I mean come on, you just don’t get better then me and her together. We’re the most fun, crazy yet very reserved people you’ll ever meet. But Casey and I are just like made for each other. We’ve known each other for what now oh I don’t know twenty years. We’ve been through everything together, I mean everything. I’ve been there for Casey when the dicks came around and she’s been there for me when the puck bunnies only wanted my money. She knows just about everything about me besides the fact that I love her, well as more then just a best friend. I do need to tell her eventually, but it won’t be an easy thing to do, that’s for sure.

I know that she would make the perfect lover, wife and mother that’s for sure. I mean, I know for a fact that if she did love me it wouldn’t because I had money or anything like that. It would be because she actually loved me. I know this might not be the most masculine thing around, but I sometimes wonder what it would be like to have kids with her and stuff like that. I’m sure she’d be the perfect mother. And not to sound conceited or anything but I think we’d make some pretty cute babies.

“YAY!” She shouted.

This was great! We were getting to like hang out like we used to do all the time. Tonight would be the perfect time to tell her I loved her, but I wasn’t sure if could manage to do so.

“Sidney, I’m tired can we head up to bed?” She asked

“Of course Casey,” I said.

“Okay, good, but can you carry me up?” She asked.

“Sure, of course I can.” I said.

“Aw, thank you.” She said.

I just smiled and picked her up, she was really light too. I walked up the stairs slowly with her and I gently laid her on the bed and I was going to leave the room.

“Where are you going?” She asked.

“umm, the couch,” I said.

“Are you insane, you’re sleeping right here beside me.” She said.

“I am?” I questioned.

“Yes, of course you are, I mean I still want to watch maybe another movie or two.” She said.

“Oh awesome, then I’ll stay right here beside you.” I said.

“Oh good, I’m cold now.” She said.

“Want a cover?” I asked.

“Nah, I think two big strong arms could help.” She said.

I’m not sure what it was that was making her say this, but she never said things like this before to me really. Sure, I’ve slept over and stuff. It’s just the first time she asks me to stay beside her and saying that my two apparently big and strong arms could help her with her cold feeling. This was an interesting side to Casey but a side I would like to get to see all the time.

“Sidney, come here now, why are you making me wait?” Casey asked.

“Oh, sorry Casey,” I said.

“Its fine, but Sidney, I’m cold so please can you hurry.” She half moaned.

I really didn’t get this; Casey was never the one to half moan with or to me. I mean where was this coming from? Something didn’t make sense. I mean if I didn’t know any better I’d think she actually did love me, as more than a friend.

“Okay Casey I’m coming.” I said.

I went up to her and before I knew it she was snuggled up against my chest. I wrapped my arms around her tightly and I noticed that she was crying and I felt the ears on my arms.

“Casey, what’s wrong?” I asked.

“Sid, it’s nothing.” She said.

“Nothing, oh please Casey don’t lie to me.”

“I’m going to miss you.” She said.

“Aw, but it’s not the first time I’m leaving.” I said.

“I know Sid, it’s just I feel as though I’m all alone now with out you around.” She said.

“Why would you be alone?” I asked.

“Because, before if you left I had my boyfriend with me.” She said.

That word makes me go just insane; I hated the fact then when I would be gone there would be another man there who wasn’t me. A man, that would get to kiss her, touch her and please her however and whenever she wanted. It made me angry that she actually needed to have a boyfriend to get that, and not get it from me. What got me even more upset is that I never told her anything. I’d tell her now, but I don’t think it’d be such a good time.

“Oh.” I said.

*Casey*

“Oh.” He said.

There was so much defeat, sorrow and anger in such a small word. But why? I have no idea why, to be perfectly honest.

“Yea, Sid and now I’m going to be all alone, who will I turn to if there’s a thunderstorm or something?” I asked.

“Casey, please don’t do this to me, you’re making me feel like I’m a fucking bastard for leavening you alone for a week.” He said.

“Oh no, that’s not what I wanted at all. I just wish I could come along.” I said.

“Oh that’s it! You’re coming with me on the next road trip we have and I don’t care what anyone says you’re coming!” He cheered..

“Really?” I asked.

“Yes, really! You’re coming no matter what! I want you there and I need you there too.” He said.

“Aw, yay!!! Oh my god! This is just unbelievable you know that right. I get to come on a road trip with you. But, what are they going to say that it’s me and not one of the guy’s girlfriends?” I asked.

"Umm, let me think, I honestly couldn't give a shit what they would say to that! Honestly, you're coming and who knows what you'll be to me by then." He said.

"Who knows what I'll be?" I asked.

"Yea, who knows what fate will have in store for us by my next road trip." He said.

That thought lingered in my head. What would I be by then? Who knew? What was this about? Was Sidney trying to tell me something that I just wasn't catching onto?

* 1 and a half weeks later*

I couldn't wait anymore, Sidney was coming back in four days. These would probably be the hardest four days of my life though. Why? Because, when Sidney came back, I wanted to tell him that I had been in love with him. Sure it was going to be a huge risk, but it's one I needed to take that's for sure. I mean, I looked back on things that have happened in the years that have passed and simply a week and a half ago. There was just so much pointing to yes that I just couldn't hold it in anymore. Sidney wasn't always going to be around, and if he did love me too, I couldn't risk waiting anymore. I mean, anyone could come along and take him from me. He is after all Sidney Crosby.

Thinking about all that's happened I thought about a time where Sidney saved my life, literally.

***
Today, was the day that Sidney was going on a two day road trip. Not long, I know but I still wanted to say bye to him. Sidney was and will always be my best friend and I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't see him before he left. We spent all the time we could together and just because he wasn't gone for a week doesn’t mean I couldn't spend a little time before he was leaving me for two whole days. Yes, with Sidney and me sometimes an hour without each other is too much.

Hey Casey,
Where are you? Are you still coming?
-Sid

Oh, he sent me a text, gosh I hate when he asks me that. It makes me feel so bad and like such a horrible friend that he actually has to text me to ask me if I was still going to see him. Of course I was going to go, but the fact that he had to send me a text, it made me feel bad.

Hey Siddy,
Oh, I'm leaving like in what maybe a minute or two! YESSS I'm still coming!
-Casey <3

Yes, I put a heart next to my name that was nothing new. It was like my little thing, although I only used it with Sid. But, he didn't need to know that. Ok, so I may have told a little white lie to Sidney, I said I was leaving in about two minutes well it was going to be more like five to ten. I still wasn't exactly ready to leave just yet. I decided to take my time just a little, I mean I wanted to look really good for Sidney. I mean, I wanted him to notice me more than usual.

----

I was now finally done getting ready and I was going to leave my house and finally go see him. To be honest I'm really surprised he didn't send me a text because I left a whole lot later then I said I was going to. As I was going to open up the door, I notice the door handle start to move.

That was kind of odd I had to say and a little scary too, it's not like I was expecting anyone. I went to my door and when I opened it, I saw my boyfriend Nathan standing there with an angry look on his face.

"Where do you think you're going Casey?" He asked.

"I’m going out." I said.

"You didn't answer my question." He said.

"Yes, I did." I said.

"No I asked where do you think you're going. Saying out isn't a good enough answer!" He said his voice getting a little more angry then it was about two minutes ago.

"I'm going to see Sidney." I said.

"Excuse me?" He asked.

"I said, I'm going to see Sidney." I said.

"Hmm, I believe you were going to see Sidney." Nathan said.

"Umm, no I'm going to see Sidney, he's leaving today and I want to say bye to him." I said.

"No Casey you're not saying bye, I think you can survive without seeing him before he's gone." He said.

"Nathan, I'm going to see him and I'm already running late." I said.

"Aww, isn't that sad, poor little bitch can't say bye to her little fag." He spat.

"Excuse me!? I'm not a bitch and Sidney isn't my fag or fag at all. Sidney is my best friend and I need to say bye." I said with anger in my voice.

"Hmm, no you don't and umm you're not going to say bye to him!" He said and slapped me across the face.

"Nathan, what's your problem! You don't control me." I said.

"My Problem. Maybe it's because my girlfriend is always blowing me off to hang out with her precious little Sidney." He said angrily.

"Blowing you off? Ok now you're insane! I've blown Sidney off at the last minute because you wanted to do something. So you can't possibly say I've blown you off to be with him. I'm telling you right now, that's the biggest bullshit lie you've ever told me!" I said.

"What are you talking about Casey, you blew me off today didn't you to go see that fucking little pussy who can't do fuck all." He said.

"Wait what the fuck Nathan! I didn't know you wanted to see me today! So go fuck yourself!" I said.

"Go fuck myself huh?" He said and started digging into his pocket.

"Y-y." I stopped before I knew it he had a knife at my neck.

This was something kind of unexpected to say the very least. I mean, even though I knew he could get jealous and on occasion he lost his temper, he was never quite this scary; sure he punched me once a while ago but he promised to never do it again. That's the only reason I really agreed to actually stay with him. But seeing this now, I guess I really shouldn't have.

"Bitch, say one word and you’ll see what happens to you!" He yelled.

I didn't know what to do, I just froze, he had a knife to my throat. I mean there was nothing I could do was there?

"Now, did you tell me to go fuck myself?" He asked.

"N-Nn-no" I managed to get out.

"LIAR! I want the fucking truth bitch!" He yelled.

"I-it is." I said.

"No It's not! Did you tell me to go fuck myself!" He yelled again.

"You know what, if she did I don't blame her." I heard a voice say and I knew it was Sidney's! Gosh, I loved that man, he always knew exactly when to come.

"Oh if it isn't her little pussy." He said.

"What the fuck did-" Sidney just stopped, I guess he realized that Nathan was holding a knife to my neck and that I was crying.

"S-s-Sid," I said.

I wish I hadn't said that because I felt a tear in my skin and I noticed that the blood was dripping down.

"FUCK! Nathan! What did you do to her!" He yelled.

"I cut her neck." He said nonchalantly.

"Nathan, you fucking Jerk!" He yelled.

"Sidney, Sidney, Sidney...boy oh boy. Your little cunt here she was umm coming to see you." He said.

"Oh FUCK NOOO!!" He yelled.

Sidney somehow managed to grab the knife out of Nathan's hand and put it to his neck.

"Like how this feels, dick." He said.

Nathan didn't know what to say.

"Exactly, listen to me you come near her again and I will slit your throat like you were planning on doing." He said.

"Oh the puss has some balls! but you're threatening me." Nathan said.

"Umm what proof do you have?" He asked.

Nathan gave us both death glares and then left.

"Sidney, oh my you-you saved me again!" I yelled.

"Yea Casey, I just had really good timing." He said.

"You're insane, good timing, no you saved my life! Do you realize that if you didn't come and save me I would've been-"

"Casey, don't finish that sentence, I couldn't imagine you dead!" He said.

"But, Sidney it's true." I said.

"Don't think about it please, come on I'll take you to my place before I go." He said.

"Ok, Sid let's go." I said.

He grabbed me in a GIANT hug and took my hand and brought me to his place like he said he would.
***