After a long day of making faces at gorillas and letting birds and butterflies land on our shoulders Geno and I headed back to the hotel to meet up with the guys for dinner. They chose a fancy steakhouse and my stomach was in knots as I sat in my usual seat. Sid glanced at me before staring back down at his plate.

“You get a boyfriend yet?” Flower asked, nudging me in the side, causing me to choke on my peach tea.

“Um, jeez Flower way to put me on the spot.” I forced a laugh.

“Come one, we see the way you’re all smiles and giggles all the time. Who’s the lucky guy?” he asked happily.

“It’s nobody. I’m just..happy. Is that a crime?” I mumbled, taking a huge bite of my steak. The table was relatively quiet as if the guys were all waiting for my response.

Sid cleared his throat to speak and my chest caught. “I heard he plays for Ottawa, that’s why someone was so eh, slow last game.” he said. I glanced down at my plate and smiled when Flower nudged me in the side.

“Who? Don’t tell me it’s Methot?! Is that why he’s always all over you out there?”

“No! I don’t wanna talk about it.” I blushed, stealing glances at Sid the whole time.

“You know, you’d be kinda cute together. If you like toothless dudes with stupid mohawks. “ Letang chirped.

“Aww leave her alone. The poor girl just wants to eat some steak.” Sid smiled.

“You’d know all about that wouldn’t you.” James said snidely. I choked on bite and my eyes were wide as he was picking his words carefully.

“Steak? I’m more of a lobster kind of guy. Maritimes you know.” He said with a chuckle.

“No, I mean Mel being all over your meat.” he said shoving a carrot in his mouth and waiting anxiously for our reaction.

“You mean the guy that called me a whore earlier this season? I don’t think so.” I forced a laugh and gave Sid a small, apologetic nod.

“Come on, just admit it, you two screw after games.”

“Nealer that’s not true.” Sid says calmly.

“Yeah, Sid’s practically a virgin.” I giggle, knowing that I’d have to apologize later.

“Hey!” he protests.

“What, don’t tell me you two make love? I know you like it rough Mel.” James smirked, leaning back in his chair.

“That’s enough James.” Pascal said awkwardly shoving a bite of mashed potatoes into his mouth.

“What? I’m just asking them to be honest.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?! You’re just gonna act like you two didn’t date? You’re gonna act like you didn’t get her pregnant and cheat on her? You’re just gonna pretend like I’m the bad guy here? Fuck off.” Sid said angrily, walking out of the room and airing out my dirty laundry.

The guys were in shock as they looked at me. I felt my face get hot and my palms sweaty. I just sat there, still at Sid’s reaction and the exposed feeling it gave me. It’s like I just took a Chara slapshot to the gut. Now they all know. I peeled a $100 bill out from my purse and sat it on the table.

“I should um—I should go.” I said quietly, the sound of my heels clicking as I left the restaurant. I called a cab, but felt arms around my shoulders.

“You okay Mel?” Sid asked, his body heat warming me. Knowing that he cared meant so much and I couldn’t help but cry.

“I just want to leave again. I don’t want drama. I never fucking asked for all of this. I don’t fucking do this shit. I shouldn’t have gotten involved with anybody.” I cried into his thick wool coat.

“I know hun, let’s juts go back to the hotel. “ He smiled wiping my tears off my cheek with his thumb.

The cab ride was silent as was the elevator up to our floor.

“Go get changed. I have something to show you. Meet me at my room in 5.”

I nodded, not even caring what he wanted to show me. I quickly changed into blue plaid Pitt Panthers pants and a white tank top. I groggily knocked on his door and he came out shirtless, wearing just workout shorts.

“What are you showing me?” I asked emotionless.

“Shh, just come out here.” He said dragging me by my arm onto the balcony. He laid out one of the hotel comforters on the hard concrete and laid down. I got on my knees when he gestured for me to sit.

“Nealer’s just trying to fuck with us. He’s being a level 3000 dick and I talked to him, but…he’s just pissy.” Sid laughed pulling me so I was laying on my back.

“Ottawa is one of the best places to stargaze.” he says out of nowhere.

I laid there silent, curled into his body and listening to his heartbeat.

“Do you ever just sit up and look at the stars? I don’t know why, but they just calm me down.” He said. It felt like we were having two different conversations.

“No. Look, I need to get some rest we have a game tomorrow” I said frustrated. I began to sit up when he pulled me back down.

“Just stay. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for all of that to come out. I’m really really sorry.” He said turning to face me. I let out a sigh and looked up and admired the stars for a moment.

“The guys will-- they’ll just be shocked for a while, but it’ll be okay.” He said slightly unsure, and trying to convince himself a bit too.

I stared up at him and watched the distant stars twinkle in his golden brown eyes. I wasn’t really mad at him for spilling the beans at dinner, I was just embarrassed. One look from him could make everything okay. I studied the bridge of his nose and the way the soft wind blew one of his geled curls. I scooted closer to his bare chest and he kissed the top of my head.

“Why can’t this just be easy.” I said, tears filling my eyes.

“Nothing worth having is ever easy.”