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Where I Belong

"Mackenna this is Jon, Jon this is my friend from college, Mackenna" I said introducing the two.

"Hi," Mackenna said.

Jonathan stood there wide eyed, Patrick nudged him on the shoulder, "H-hi" Jonathan stuttered.

Patrick's mother and sisters were leaving today, and some of the team was over to say goodbye.

Patrick and I had been waiting to introduce Mackenna and Tazer, we both had a feeling they would click.

"I'm gonna miss you so much" Donna said holding up Cody.

Patrick loaded all their bags into the car that would take them to the airport, we exchanged hugs, and Patrick and I let out a sigh of relief as soon as they pulled away.

He held onto my hips as we watched the car drive down the road. When the car was out of sight we pulled smiled, as he picked my up and swung me in a circle, before kissing me hard.

We went back inside to see Patrick teammates, beginning to leave, Jonathan and Mackenna were exchanging phone numbers.

A few hours later, everyone was gone, Patrick and I were in heaven. It was just us, and our kids. We sat together on the couch, Cody was lying in Patrick's lab, and Shayne was laying up against my legs that were perched up on the coffee table.

"So who do you think will be a better hockey player?" Patrick asked.

I laughed, "Patrick they're barely 4 weeks old"

He laughed, "Yea, you're probably right."

We had decided months ago, that we would start off all our kids playing hockey until they got to an age where they could decide whether or not they wanted to stick with it. Both of us knew we obviously wanted all our kids to stick with it, Patrick and I had both grown up on the sport, and had a deep passion for it.
...
A few months passed before Patrick's next road trip, the boys were getting bigger, they were about 3 months old now.

I was nervous about being alone with them for the first time. The boys hadn't been to a game yet, Patrick and I were nervous to take them out to much yet, especially after what happened the day we left the hospital.

"You'll be fine" Patrick said, "You're a great mother." he kissed me on the forehead his arms tightly around my waist.

He pulled a small, blue box out of his pocket. "Here" he said sweetly,

"Patrick!" I said opening to box to reveal a pandora bracelet, with both boys initails and birth stones carved into charms.

"Its gorgeous I love it! Thank you!" I said kissing him.

"I love you" Patrick said , "I love you too" I said kissing him one last time before he turned, picked up his bag and left for a five day road trip.


And then it was just me, my babies, and Charlie.

I heated up bottles for both babies and propped them up in their baby seats on the coffee table, when I sat them next to each other, I started to notice the differences between them.

Shayne had Patrick's face to a t, he had the same nose, clear blue eyes, and his blonde baby hair was starting to curl in ringlets around his head. Cody was more of a mix, he had my darker, ocean blue eyes, and his hair was a light mix of blonde and red. As they grew, it was easier to tell them apart, it made me a little sad, but I knew as the got older they would be able to do more.

The boys were well behaved for the most part, they only cried when they were uncomfortable or hungry, and had just started sleeping through the night.

I was feeding Shayne when my cell phone rang, I set Shayne back in his baby seat, and answered it.

"Kylie you are not gonna believe this." Mackenna said on the other line.
"What?what?!" I said excitedly.
"I slept with Jon!" she said.
"What?!" I yelled, stirring Cody a bit from his nap, "So are you guys like, together."
"I think so," she said, "three months is together right?"
"I would think so, and Jonny doesn't sleep around, you guys are definatley together." we both squealed like teenaged girls.
"How have you guys been seeing each other?" I asked, Mackenna had flown back to Boston after visiting, Patrick and I and the twins a few months ago.
"Well, we hung out after they played Boston last month, and ever since then we've been flying back and forth, I would have told you sooner, but we didn't want the press and stuff getting involved, if we weren't serious yet."
"I'm so happy for you Mack," I said grinning,Cody started crying as he woke up "But I gotta go, call me tomorrow?"
"Of course! Bye Kyls!" she said.
" bye Mack." I said before hanging up and picking up Cody to give him a bottle.

I was rocking Cody back and forth in my arms when I started to feel, some emotion boiling up. I looked around the empty townhouse. It was just me, and my kids. I would have laid down my life for these two babies, but it still felt like something was missing, I picked up my phone and reluctantly dialed my moms number.

"Mom?" I said through the phone.
"the number you are trying to reach has been disconnected." a recording read on the other side of the phone.

I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces, I put my head in my hands, bawling my eyes out. How did this happen? How did I get so disconnected from my family that they wouldn't want to meet my children?

I looked up to see Cody and Shayne staring at me wide eyed, and I realized something. Patrick, Shayne and Cody were all the family I needed, I couldn't keep chasing after my mother, I was a grown adult and so was she, the only thing that hurt me was Shayne and Cody would never meet the other half of their family.

The next day Abby brought Saidie and Madelyn over to meet the boys.

"Be careful Mads." Abby said as I placed Cody in the little girls arms.

"He's so little." she said looking down at the baby. We snapped a few pictures of the kids together, before putting Saidie, Cody, and Shayne down for a nap, while Madelyn watched Cinderella for about the thousandth time.

Abby and I sat in the open dining room and talked.

"So whats going on with your mom?" she asked.

"She disconnected the number," I said, "I haven't seen or heard from any of them since our wedding."

"Thats crazy," she said wide eyed,

"I don't even care," I said sipping my coffee "If they want to talk to me they know where I am, the whole thing is just ridiculous.All because I didn't take a stupid job."

"As long as you two are happy thats all that matters." Abby said, "And besides, you guys have your own little family now, and your Blackhawks family of course."

We both smiled.

The next few days were filled with bottles, diaper changes, and lonely nights. By Friday morning I couldn't wait for Patrick to get home.

Patrick came in around 2 o'clock, sporting 8 stitches over his eye where he took a stick to the head the night before.

"Hi" he said kissing me smiling, as I held Shayne in my arms. "Hi" I said kissing him back.

"Wow," he said looking at the twins, they look bigger, I passed Shayne over to him, and he sat on the couch cradling the baby.
...
The next day was an off day for Patrick, we spent the day lounging around, hanging out with the babies, I had no idea how much I would miss these days.

Notes

Comments

soooo good! and I would totally read about Jonathan and MacKenna!

cntrygrl45 cntrygrl45
4/1/14

OMG!

Psquared91 Psquared91
3/27/14

LOVE IT

Psquared91 Psquared91
3/6/14

AWWW!!! SOOO CUTE. Im literally starting to cry. Its just soo sweet and it really shows the emotion.

Psquared91 Psquared91
3/4/14

OMG! I LOVE IT AND I actually understand how hard it is to juggle out so many different things.

Psquared91 Psquared91
3/4/14