Counting Stars

My plane landed in Pittsburgh early Wednesday morning of the Family Skate. Janet and the SNl team gave me leave for the majority of the day so I could go to the party. Walking through the concourse, only a few people are milling about the airport at this ungodly hour. Past security I scan the small crowd waiting for those passengers on my plane and spy Sidney towards the back with a baseball cap on his head. We make eye contact and a smile spreads across his face. Increasing my short stride I practically launch myself into his arms.

“Good morning,” I inhale his familiar scent. We haven’t seen each other since the day before Thanksgiving and I realize it’s been much, much too long.

His arms tighten around me, “Safe flight?”

I simply nod then stand on my tiptoes to quickly kiss him, “I slept the whole flight, Thank you for picking me up.”

“I wouldn’t have let anyone else,” We finally break apart. “Any bags?”

“I traveled light.”

“So two rather large suitcases then?” He mimes searching the baggage claim.

“Har, har. You’re hilarious. Really though its just my duffle and purse.” Since I was leaving tonight it dint make sense for me to pack a lot of bags.

Satisfied with my answer Sidney grabs my duffle and the two of us walk to his car hand in hand. The mid-Decemeber weather is cold and a few snowflakes fall. It is peaceful and I lean closer to Sidney.

In Sidney’s car we crank up the heat and begin the drive back to his place, “You’re sure you don’t need to stop by your suite?”

“Nope, besides I’m starting to move my stuff out, the lease ends soon.”

“So you won’t have a place to stay in Pittsburgh once January rolls around?”

I nod, “With awards season starting, I will probably be spending most of my time in L.A.”

“I see,” we are both silent and it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that we are thinking about the future. Over the next few months my schedule will be busier than ever, not to mention that Sidney will be spending time in Russia for the Olympics. We need to have the talk about our relationship but now is probably not the best time.

I grab Sidney’s hand and force a smile, “More importantly, what is the plan for today?”

Sidney visibly relaxes and it is clear that he is thankful for the subject change, “No practice today and the party starts at 11. So I figured we can nap and maybe have some breakfast before we go.”

“Sounds good. It will be nice to see everyone again. I’ve missed Vero and Carol-Lynn, and of course the guys as well.” That’s true, watching the games on TV from afar makes me miss the easy friendship I found with Sidney’s teammates as well as their significant others.

“Everyone is excited to see you, they’ve missed you too. How is Emma by the way?”

The short relationship between Emma and Beau ran its course a few days ago. Surprisingly it was Beau who wanted to be exclusive and not Emma. “She is good really. I think she misses him, but it’s for the best.”

“You’re probably right.”

The rest of the ride is silent and when we get to Sidney’s house both of us make a beeline to the bedroom and promptly pass out.

*****


I open my eyes and am greeted by Brooklyn’s beautiful face. She looks innocent and peaceful. It feels great to have her in my arms again. The past two weeks have been a little hard, the team is in the middle of a losing slump and Brooklyn’s been away. The two of us need to discuss our relationship, she is always on my mind and I’m wondering if she feels the same.

Brooklyn is truly special; my family lover her, my teammates too and if I’m being honest with myself I’m falling in love with her. I can see us together in the future. Who knows how she feels though? She could literally have any guy in the world. And those guys would probably fit better in her life. During my musings Brooklyn has started to stir and soon her pale blue eyes meet mine. She smiles and stretches her lithe body, “How long did we sleep?”

I roll over to check my phone, “Shit, it’s already 10. I guess we are skipping breakfast.”

“You should have woken me up.”

Glancing at my beautiful girlfriend I see her stars to yawn, “Really?”

After her yawning she chuckles, “Okay, you’re right, that nap was everything.”

Brooklyn hops out of bed and grabs clothes from her small bag. She disappears into the bathroom while I change in the bedroom.

“So is this appropriate?” She asks and I turn to look. She is wearing an obnoxious red Christmas sweater with trees and ornaments. Even in this she still manages to look good, I appreciate her tight dark wash jeans and half boots.

I contain my laughter for a moment and then we both lose it, “You’ve never looked sexier babe.”

“Aw shucks,” she saunters over to me, swaying her hips in the most exaggerated manner and throws her arms around my neck. ‘’I wish you would have told me sooner, that this was such a turn-on, I just threw out my entire collection.”

I shake my head remorsefully, “Damn. I guess I will muddle through. Seriously, you might want to bring gloves or mittens.”

“Do I need them?” She is on the other side of the room organizing her purse.

“I mean we will be on the ice for a little bit, and it can get pretty cold,” I see her body tense up and her movements stop. “Is everything okay?”

She turns around and nods quickly, “Of course! I think I will be fine without the gloves though. Ready to go?”

I decide to let her abnormal behavior slide for now and we head to my car. The entire drive there I see Brooklyn out of the corner of my eye. She is bouncing her knee or fidgeting with the car handle. Finally it is too much. “Are you sure everything is okay?”

“Really, Sidney it is,” she rolls her eyes, but resumes her bouncing.

We pull into Consol and the two of us hop out of the car and walk to the locker room. When we enter about half of the team is there with their families. Children are everywhere and a lot of them in their fathers’ jerseys. I glance down at Brooklyn who is smiling at the scene and squeeze her hand. She looks up at me confused. I smile at her, “Hey.”

She just shakes her head, “Hey yourself.”

Our moment is broken by Vero’s voice, “Brooklyn! Welcome back, it’s been ages.” Her exclamation attracts everyone else and a chorus of greetings fills the locker room. The two of us smile and wave making our way over to my stall.

****


My palms are sweating as Sidney and I walk across the locker room. We greet the Fleury family and I finally get to meet their little girl, “She is beautiful Vero.”

Marc interjects proudly, “She takes after her mother.”

Sidney sits down in his stall and pulls me into his lap so there is room for other people. The four of us make small talk as I look around the room. There are a lot of kids and I don’t recognize all the WAGs either. “Jesus, does everyone have kids?”

I slightly bounce as Sidney laughs, “It seems that way, doesn’t it? Only a few of us are still holding out.”

More and more people filter in and everyone acknowledges Sidney with a head nod or a wave. “It’s like you’re the Godfather or something.”

“Hardly,” He kisses my check as the coach walks in.

Coach Dan clears his throat, “Welcome to the annual Family Holiday Party and Skate, the Pens TV cameras are here so act naturally and have fun!”

The momentarily silent locker room is once again a cacophony of noise. Sidney stands, “I’ll get us some skates and be back.”

Hopefully I smile in response because on the inside I’m terrified. Frozen water and I do not mix. Ever since the 6th grade I vowed never to go ice skating again. Truly my feet perform better on solid ground, but skating is Sidney’s life, his career. I would be the worst girlfriend in the world if I didn’t even try to do this for him.

Geno joins me on the bench, “You look sick, what Sid do now?”

I laugh at the big Russian, “Nothing, he didn’t do anything.” I notice that Geno doesn’t seem to have anyone with him. “You didn’t bring a girl with you?”

“No, I have no girl. Usually Lazy, Sid and I stick together at these things, but you stole him.”

His mock glare makes me laugh, “Oh, I’m so sorry. Maybe we can share him?”

“I would rather share you,” Geno winks comically and I can’t help but laugh.

“Sorry man she is all mine,” I hope that only the three of us catch his double entendre, but I doubt it.

Sidney has returned with two pairs of skates and I try to maintain the smile on my face. Everyone around me is lacing up their skates and I feel my stomach tighten into knots. Sidney pushes Geno down the bench so that the two of us are next to each other.

I slide off my boots and fit my feet into the skates. Next to me, Sidney is lacing is skates deftly like he’s done it a thousand times. Of course he has probably done it more like a million times. I’m struck once again that I’m dating the best hockey player in the word. And now I have to try to skate with aforementioned boyfriend.

The two of us head to the ice with Geno and James. Cameras are milling around and I know that the four of us are an important shot. These three men are some of the most recognizable on the team. We are getting closer and closer to the ice until finally we are on the home bench. Seeing the arena from this view is pretty incredible. I get lost in the view and I almost miss Sidney going on the ice, “Wait, babe.”

He turns, one skate on the ice and one off, “Yeah?”

I lean close to him conscious of his teammates behind me, “I, uh, I can’t skate.”

“This is too good,” I hear James and Geno chuckling behind me. I glare at them while I wait for Sidney’s answer.

Sidney slightly smiles, “I figured as much. When I mentioned it earlier you should have seen your face.”

“You knew?”

He shrugs, “I took an educated guess. The good news is that you have the arguably best teacher in the world.”

“You two are disgusting,” James grumbles as he and Geno pass us to get to the ice.

“Are you ready?” Sidney’s hand is outstretched and his eyes are gentle and sincere.

Looking out at the ice I see a lot of young kids skating easily as well as some of the WAGs. Vero was even skating while holding their toddler for Pete’s sake. I take a deep breath. “Don’t let me fall Crosby.”

He is smiling when I put my hand in his, “Never.”

*****


I step onto the ice with Brooklyn in tow and can’t help but smile. My girlfriend can’t skate and I absolutely love it. Now, I get to share this incredibly important part of my life with her. Currently though she seems more interested in the boards than the ice, “Come on babe, let go, I got you.”

Anyone can see her physically take a breath to prepare herself, but regardless she lets go, “Alright, now what?”

Pausing, I try to think of the best way to teach her, “Can you roller skate?”

“I kick a-“ she stops noticing Vitale’s son going by. “I kick butt at roller skate.”

I chuckle, “Perfect, use those same motions and then,” before I can finish my instructions Brooklyn moves and almost falls. “But the friction is going to be a little different.”

She huffs, “I see.”

In a few moments she gets the hang of it and is actually pretty good. The two of us skate over to Duper and Carol-Lynn. The four of us talk for a little and then they are called away to deal with a crying child.

“God, the two of them are perfect.”

I turn to my girlfriend, “What do you mean?”

“They are just so happy with their kids and she still has a demanding career. I’m just envious.”

“Envious?”

Brooklyn’s eyes widen and I can tell she wishes she didn’t say that out loud, “They are just the best possible outcome of this whole dating a professional athlete I think. “ She looks down. “The goal is to be them isn’t it?”

I pause, the confirmation of her assumption on my lips, but I stop myself. Why does she sound so sad when she says that? “I suppose, but everyone is different maybe someone doesn’t want that.”

She doesn’t look at me when she responds, “That’s what you want.”

I’m dumbfounded, this conversation turned quickly and I’m not sure what to say. She’s not wrong, but she is not completely right either.

My silence was the wrong answer though and it is clear on Brooklyn’s face. She slips into a character and it is easy to see. “Sorry, I’m just rambling. Let’s go join everyone else.”

I let her pull us away from the wall and we rejoin the group. We skate for while relaxing, switching partners, and showing off. The Pens TV cameras are going to have a lot of footage. Towards the end Brooklyn and I are skating together again when Duper’s son cuts in front of us and Brooklyn can’t stop fast enough. Her arm latches to mine for balance, but I’m caught off guard and can’t stop us from falling. Brooklyn ends up on top of me on the ice.

The chirping immediately starts but I focus on Brooklyn who is beneath me, “Are you okay?”

Her blue eyes meet mine, “So is this your move?”

“My move?” I’m concerned for a moment that she might have hit her head.

She laughs, “Oh, the mild-mannered Canadian hockey star offers to teach the girl to skate and then suddenly he’s past the blue line?”

“Blue line?”

“Isn’t that what you Canadians call second base?” She wiggles her eyebrows and I take a moment to look at our positions. Brooklyn is practically straddling me on the ice. To say the least our positions are less than proper for a family event.

“Damn, you figured out my evil plan,” I help her to her feet, as a few people come over.

Letang speaks first, “I’m impressed Brooklyn you knocked our Captain down, usually he only dives for penalties.”

I punch Kris in the shoulder, “Very funny.”” One look at Brooklyn assures me that the reference is over her head. “I’ll explain later.”

She simply shrugs, “I’m going to take refuge with the other ladies on the bench.”

We all unabashedly check her out as she walks away. Kris whistles, “If I wasn’t a happily married man.”

“Do I need to punch you again?” he skates away before I can make good on my promise towards James and Geno. I follow. By now most of the kids have taken a break so it’s just us on the ice.

“She really not know how to skate?" Geno asks.

I nod, “Yup, she is a natural though.”

“Good, your girl needs to know how to skate. It’s bad enough that she is an American.” The sad thing is James is only partly joking.

From across the arena we hear the girls all start to laugh and then, “James, I am going to kill you slowly and painfully.”

I look at James who is doing his best impression of an innocent man, “What did you do?”

He laughs, “I just sent a little tweet.”

“Let’s see.”

James pulls out his phone and opens twitter. Sure enough is latest tweet mentions Brooklyn.

@jneal_18: I think @BrooklynRae has fallen for our Captain, literally

And James has attached a photo from just a few minutes ago when Brooklyn was on top of me. Both of us have smiles are on our face, but it clearly is the two of us.

“If my feet didn’t hurt I would be over there right now!”

Brooklyn’s threat is too funny and obviously not serious for any of us to be concerned. Just then James phone chirps and we all crowd around to see what it is.

@BrooklynRae: Is somebody jealous @jneal_18?

Our small group of guys erupts in ‘ohs’ and ‘oohs’. James’ retaliation is prevented by the children who rejoin us on the ice.

*****


I’m sitting on the bench talking to Vero and Carol-Lynn when the kids and other WAGs rejoin the group. Inevitably my favorite WAG, Ann comes over to join us, “It’s so great to see you here Brooklyn. Any more questions about what WAG life since the last time we spoke?” I shake my head, hoping that it will end the conversation, but she continues. “Well then, we are having our annual gift exchange in just a few days we would love to have you there.” We hear a child scream. “Oh darn, that’s me. Vero and Carol-Lynn can tell you all about it.”

She leaves and I look at my friends, “You always desert me when she comes to talk!”

They both chuckle and say sorry even though I doubt they really mean it. “She is right for once; you should come to the lunch. It actually is fun!”

“I’ll think about it,” They seem satisfied with my answer. The three of us catch up on our lives for a little bit while casually looking at the guys still on the ice. I have to admit that there is nothing hotter than seeing a guy with a baby or a child. Towards the end everyone is filtering off and Sidney comes back to the bench. We walk back in the locker room to change out of our skates. The PR head is supervising some pictures. She comes up to us just as we are about to head out, “Do you mind Sidney?”

Sidney looks to me and I smile, “Why not?”

We take a quick photo the two of us before Dupuis and Carol-Lynn join us as well. Finally, we head out after saying our goodbyes. The two of us are in the car ride home and I realize it’s the first time we’ve been alone since the time on the ice. Instead of the comfortable ride I’m used to, the silence is thick and awkward.

Sidney takes a deep breath, “I think we need to talk.” I nod and he continues. “I know your lease is up at the end of this month, but I still want you here with me as much as possible. It’s still early with us yeah, but I can tell that this is something special and I want to see where it will go. If we give up now because it’s too hard, I think the both of us are going to miss out on something great.” I’m silent, digesting Sidney’s words. He wants me to stay, he just gave me an open invitation to his house, he wants to make this work. I must be silent for a while because Sidney coughs, “So?”

I grab Sidney’s hand, “That sounds perfect, I want to keep this going too Sidney. This is something special and I’m having so much fun. Forgive me for my little melt down today?”

“No problem at all, babe. We can discuss the specifics later, I know you have a flight to catch, but I didn’t want you to leave without me putting this on the table.”

We have pulled up to the airport and I turn to Sidney, smiling. Leaning forwards we seal our decision with a kiss, which in typical fashion gets out of hand. A knock on the window, breaks our kiss. Sidney, red-faced rolls the window down to a police officer. The officer stands confidently and is probably in his late twenties. “You two really need to..” And then the officer looks up and notices Sidney. “Oh, Mr. Crosby I’m uh really sorry.”

Sidney shakes his head, “No, its fine. We are blocking traffic.”

At the mention of we the officer turns to me and it takes a moment, but recognizes me too, “I’ll be damned. Brooklyn Donahue, a huge fan miss. Really.” Then him and Sidney share a look than can only be described as male pride, “You are one lucky son of a bitch.”

Sidney laughs, “Yes, I am. We will be on our way though.”

“No, take your time.”

When the officer walks away Sidney and I burst into laughter, “You just keep getting me into trouble.”

“Oh, please you will never get in trouble in this town, they worship you.”

To Sidney’s credit he doesn’t deny it. The two of us do get out of the car though and he helps me with my bags, “Have a safe flight, and fun in New York. When will I see you next?”

Sidney has a game in New York the same day I am on Jimmy Fallon, so I know that I will see him that day, but I want to surprise him, “I’m not sure right now, I will have to look at my schedule and yours. Soon though I promise. Watch me on SNL?”

“The guys are planning a viewing party. I’ll miss you.”

We kiss one last time, “I’ll miss you too.” And with that I force myself to step away and walk in the airport. It’s getting more and more difficult to leave this man, and it’s frightening me.

Notes

One of my favorite chapters! I hope y'all enjoy!!!