Tongue Tied

Alex was pissed. She was beyond pissed. She sat across from Nathan at a diner he had driven her to. He rambled on about how the milkshakes were unreal, and that she needed to try one. She ordered a strawberry milkshake but didn't say a word in response to him. He drew things on the table with his finger as he waited for her to lash out. He knew it was coming.

She still hadn't said a word when the milkshakes were set in front of them. She sipped from it slowly and just stared at him. She was waiting for him to crack. She saw him chug his drink and fiddle around, something he always did when nervous. He squeezed his eyes shut and pulled back. He let out a groan and held his head.

"Brain freeze." He whined.

"Why did you show up at my dorm?" She blurted.

"I honestly needed to talk to someone." He explained as he tried to get his brain freeze to disappear.

"And you conveniently knew Jared's name." She scoffed.

"You said it!" He fibbed.

"No, I didn't. You knew it." She hissed. "Don't try to make me look dumb."

"I could never make you look dumb." He sighed.

"Then what's up? Why did you show up at my room and know my partner's name?" She asked.

"Partner?"

"As in, project partner." She rolled her eyes.

"I was told it seemed like more than that." He muttered.

"What? Who would've even," She stopped herself. "Gabe texted you, didn't he?" Nathan nodded. "Look, Jared is honestly just my project partner. Great guy, but he's had a girlfriend since the eighth grade. No worries."

"Thank God." He exhaled.

She nodded and went back to drinking her milkshake. Enough time had passed for her to finish it before she realized what had just happened. She defended herself towards Nathan's accusations. She did that and she didn't have to anymore. He left her. He promised her a bunch of things and broke them by just leaving her. She didn't owe him anything.

"I don't have to prove myself to you." She shot at him. "You're the one who ended this. I shouldn't feel like I have to defend myself because y,"

"If you're defending yourself, maybe you think there's still something there!" He exclaimed.

She shook her head. "No. No, you lost that privilege." She said through gritted teeth before she stood and walked out.

He smacked down a twenty before he followed her. They walked one behind another for a bit. Both were full of emotions. Alex was mostly anger. Nathan couldn't explain his. They got to the corner before she spun around. She walked over to her and threw her hands out.

"I give up, Nathan! I don't know what you want from me anymore!" She screamed. "You left me and now you're mad at the possibility of me moving on?"

"I didn't want to leave you! I never wanted to lose you!" He yelled.

"You didn't have to!" She cried. "You made that decision when you stopped contacting me! I could only so so much!"

He stared into her eyes. They were glossy. He took a deep breath, letting his shoulders slump. He noticed her chest rise and fall, quickly. She was so worked up and built up of a bunch of a emotions. He stepped closer to her. There were only centimetres between them. She glared up at him.

"I know how much I fucked up, and nothing will ever make up for that." He stayed in a calm voice. "But I am still so fucking in love with you that it's ridiculous. I can't hear about one more aspect of your life coming from Matt, or Gabe, or Kya. I want to be there. I want to experience it with you."

She shook her head before she shoved him with all her strength. He stumbled a fair bit back. She was on a rampage. She ran back at him, shoving him again. He didn't know what to do. He had never seen her so angry. He was honestly scared.

"You've caused me so much fucking grief in the past three years of my god damn life! You think you can just batt your fucking eyelashes at me and I'll come running back? You're wrong, so fucking wrong!" She screeched.

"Al,"

"Shut up! Just shut up!" She said, still screeching. "Everything in my life was better before I fucked it up by falling in love with you! I question my sanity everyday because I'm still in fucking love with you! I just came here to get a diploma without this shit! I hate you! I hate you so fucking much!" She panted hard. "Why can't you just leave me alone, Nathan?"

He frowned. "If that's what you want, I'll go. I'll stay out of your life." He promised. "All I want is for you to be happy."

"Then let me be. Don't ask about me, don't talk about me, don't think about me. Just let me go on without you being a burden for once." She begged as tears streamed down her face.

He nodded. He turned away slowly. He walked a bit before he stopped. He walked back to her, extending a wad of cash to her. He kept his head down to shield him being in the same state as her. She took the money slowly, examining it. She gasped when she registered what it was and looked up at him.

"Nate, I c,"

"Please," His eyes met her. "I just need you to use it to get home safe. I don't care about the amount there."

She nodded. "You're a good guy."

"I just wasn't to you." He sighed before walking away.

Notes