Cry to Me

Bacon. Bacon and sausage. That's the aroma that Sidney woke up to; the overwhelming smell of bacon and sausage. Opening his eyes, he saw sunlight coming through the small slit in Dulci's blackout curtains. Her television hummed quietly on the HGTV, something that he'd learn to sleep with when he stayed at her house. She was no longer in bed, and hadn't been there for quite some time. Her side of the bed was cool to the touch. When he looked at the door, he saw that it wasn't completely closed, but opened slightly like the curtains. As his hearing caught up to his sight, he heard the sizzling of the bacon in the kitchen, cabinets and drawers opening and closing, and oddly, two voices; Dulci's and another female voice. She had an English accent. The two were laughing about something. As she slowly rose out of bed, he slipped on his boxers and undershirt, but he had a hard time finding his dress shirt. He slipped on his slacks and slowly opened the door, conscious of the fact that it was squeaky when opened quickly.He stalked down the hall, not wanting to eavesdrop per say, but he was curious as to what the two were discussing.

“What’s he like in bed?”

The question stopped him.He was torn.While he wanted to know how Dulci would answer, he was nervous that she’d compare him to Henry, thinking he was still sound asleep in her bedroom and not standing right around the corner listening to the conversation.

Dulci sighed dreamily out loud, remembering each and every time they’ve had sex. She’d told Aggie everything in the past, but for some reason, she felt shy and reserved about her sex with Sidney, like it was private and just for them and no one else.She smiled bashfully as she cut onions on the cutting board.

“How’s Oscar?” Dulci asked, trying to change the subject.

“Don’t change the subject, Dulci! I asked you a question and I demand an answer.”

“Ok,” Dulci responded reluctantly, putting the knife down, wiping her hands on her pants.

Sidney winced. Did she actually think their sex was just ok?If he remembered correctly, he had her wrapped around his finger every time they had sex.He made her come at least once every single time, apart from the first.He’d be happier with a “good,” or “great.”Maybe she did prefer the sex she had with Henry more than the sex with him, and it made him feel a little queasy.He didn’t have the slightest idea as to how to incorporate that into sex.He’d have to figure out a way to ask her.

“I’ve never had sex like this, ever. It’s breathtaking, toe-curling, mind-blowing, extraordinary. I’ve never known Jason or Henry to read and know my body like Sidney does.”

Sidney exhaled slowly, relieved with Dulci’s follow up answer. He knew of Henry, but who was Jason?And, had she really only had sex with two people other than him?Of course he read her body when they had sex.Why would he continue to do something that she wasn’t enjoying?

“He knows what he’s doing. And the orgasms, they’re intense.It’s usually at a fast pace, which I love.But last night, it was different.It was slow and deep, and I know this sounds so cliché, but we were one person last night.The pleasure was so overwhelming that I almost cried,” Ducli explained as she looked down, feeling emotional all of a sudden, remembering the overwhelming feeling of being choked up during sex.

There were a few tears, but Ducli must not have noticed. He watched a few stray tears fall down her face as she started to come, squeezing his hand and shoulder, digging her heals into his backside.

“Dulci, my dear, you’re in love.”

“I am,” Dulci confirmed, nodding and smiling.

“What if the feeling isn’t mutual, Aggie? What if I’m in over my head and I end up getting hurt?”While she questioned Sidney’s feelings for her, she remembered the look in his eyes when he asked her not to leave him.She swore she saw love, but she couldn’t be sure.

“That’s rubbish! You know he’s in love with you, too.And if he’s not, I’ll make an impromptu visit and talk some sense into him,” Aggie said matter-of-factly.

“How did you know with Oscar?”

“I could just feel it. It’s hard to put into words.He eventually told me.”

Sidney made a promise right then and there that he needed to tell her soon, especially since he now knew that she loved him, too.

“Lets change the subject before I drive myself crazy. How’s Rosie?She never answers any of my calls,” Dulci said as she started chopping raw spinach.

“She’s good. She’s trying to adopt a baby at the moment.She’s waiting to hear back on her app…application.”

Dulci looked at her computer screen, wondering why Aggie all of sudden seemed lost in thought, staring aimlessly into at the screen.

“Are you ok, Aggie?” Dulci asked, mixing the chopped onion and spinach with raw eggs.

“Wow. He’s handsome,” Aggie said distantly.It caught Dulci off guard.Who the hell was she talking about?

“Good morning,” Sidney said walking up behind Dulci, leaning over her shoulder to kiss her cheek.

“Hi… I didn’t even hear you get up,” Dulci blushed as she looked back at Aggie and the giant smile on Aggie’s face seeing Sidney’s small display of affection. Dulci hated PDA.

“What are you making,” Sidney asked, looking at her spread from over her shoulder.

“Omelettes, bacon, sausage, toast,” Dulci listed, tucking hair behind her ears.

“Smells amazing,” Sidney complimented before turning to open the refrigerator.

“Ahem,” Aggie cleared her throat to get Dulci’s attention.

“Oh. Sidney, this is my cousin Agatha, the one I was telling you about in England.Aggie, this is Sidney,” Dulci motioned back and forth between Sidney and her computer sceen.

“Hi Sidney! It’s lovely to finally meet Dulci’s boyfriend, even if it’s on skype.Hopefully I’ll see you at the wedding?And nobody calls me Agatha.Call me Aggie.”

Dulci closed turned her head, closing her eyes. While Sidney called her his girlfriend once after the snuff with his dad, they hadn’t discussed their relationship status since then.She was also afraid to hear how he’d answer the wedding question.She knew he wouldn’t be able to come, and she didn’t want to hear him say it again.

“I’m a lucky guy to have her. And I’ll try my best to come to the wedding.It depends on where we are in the season,” he explained to Aggie, sipping on a cup of coffee.

“Season?” Aggie asked confused as she looked toward Dulci.

“He plays professional hockey. Your wedding is right before the playoffs,” Dulci tried to explain, looking to Sidney for support.

“Oh! Well that’s exciting!” Aggie gushed.

“If you’re ever in the States, I’d be happy to get you tickets to a game. Although, I’d have to have my sister sit with you.Dulci wouldn’t be able to explain anything to you,” he teased, failing to keep a straight face.

“Hey! I’ve picked up a few things!” Dulci corrected him, jabbing lightly in the ribs, making him laugh.

“Ugh. The bell is ringing.Break is over.I’ll talk to you later, Dulci!It was lovely meeting you, Sidney.Bye!”

“Bye Aggie,” Dulci said as she ended the skype session.

“Sorry if our talking woke you up,” Dulci apologized, heating up a pan for the omelette.

“Not at all. It was actually the smell of bacon,” he said as he took a strip to eat.

“Do you have practice this morning?”

“I have an optional skate, but I’d rather eat breakfast with my girlfriend,” he said, pulling her into a hug. When Aggie mentioned the boyfriend comment, he could feel Dulci freeze, and while she didn’t notice, he looked at her to find her wincing.He could tell she wasn’t sure how he’d take the label.He figured he’d fix her insecurities.He could feel her relax into him, quietly sighing into his shoulder.

“Can I help with anything?” he asked, releasing her to let her continue cooking.

“Umm, I think I’m ok. Thanks for offering.”

He watched as she poured the egg mixture into the pan, thinking that it looked vaguely familiar, but he couldn’t place the memory. He watched as she flipped the egg on one side, folding it perfectly in half, scratching her leg with her big toe, humming a tune he wasn’t familiar with.He was so engrossed in her that he didn’t hear her asking a question.

“Hmm?”

“Do you want toast?” she chuckled as she asked, watching him flush with embarrassment.

“Sure, I’ll make it,” he cleared his throat before asking if he could make her some.

Once the food was ready, Dulci motioned him over to eat at her couch and coffee table instead of eating at the table.

“Before you judge me, I do this every morning that I’m home. I watch two reruns of Sex and the City and I have no regrets,” she explained as she turned her television on.

“That’s fine by me. When in Rome.”He took a bite of his omelette.

“My mom’s omelettes taste exactly like this. She’d be thrilled that someone makes them like her,” he said through chews.

Of course it tastes the same. It’s her recipe.Dulci wanted to make the morning special, especially after their night together.She knew that the next couple of weeks would be hard.She’d be working late night shifts and if she remembered correctly, he’d be going on a long road trip soon.Time spent together would be sparse to say the least.

“Is this her recipe?” he inquired, drawing her out of her thoughts.

“It is. I didn’t want to say anything incase I didn’t do it justice,” she rambled.

“Its delicious, maybe even better than her’s.”

Dulci smiled, exhilarated that he loved her cooking so much.

“Did she give this to you at the house the other night?”

“No. She emailed it to me.We’ve been sharing recipes over email.”When she looked at him, he was already looking at her, staring with an unreadable expression.She instantly got butterflies, eager yet nervous to know what he was thinking.Was she overstepping her bounds by having a separate relationship with his mother?He gently took her plate off of her lap and put their empty plates on the coffee table, and before she knew what he was doing, he grabbed her face, rubbing her one of her cheeks with his large thumb, and kissed her, releasing one hand to pull her as close to him as possible while they were still seated.

“You’re amazing. Thank you for liking my parents,” he whispered between kisses.

Dulci loved Trina. She was warm, welcoming, and amiable.And they both loved cooking, so they instantly had something in common other than her son.She couldn’t say the same for his dad, but their last engagement was civil, and that was better than nothing.

He pulled her into him, putting his arm over her shoulder, letting her continue her morning ritual not wanting to interfere. It was quite the opposite.He wanted to be involved in her morning routine, or maybe create a new one involving them together.They watched the episode in relative silence, Dulci laughing occasionally, and Sidney asking for clarification on characters.When the second episode started, Dulci rolled her eyes with irony.It was the episode where Miranda goes to the clinic for the abortion.Of all six seasons, how did that episode run the morning that Sid was watching with her?

“I’d be livid if I impregnated a girl and she kept it a secret to get an abortion.” Dulci froze, knowing that that exact situation did happen to Sid, and he still didn’t know.She instantly felt terrible and traitorous that she was keeping Carly’s secret from him.Her mind roamed.If Dulci told him that Carly aborted, how would he react?Would he be mad at her that she knew the entire time?How did he feel about abortions in general?Would she be truthful if he asked her if she’d ever been pregnant or had an abortion?

“Would you ever do it to a guy?” Sidney asked, making her even more uncomfortable. She had done it to Jason, and when she eventually told him, he broke up with her.Should she lie to him or tell him the truth, not exactly knowing how he’d treat her knowing she’d done it.Would he think differently of her?

“Would you do it to me?”

She looked at him, seeing the man that she loved, and told the truth. While she wouldn’t admit it to anyone, she could see herself with Sidney until she grew old.She occasionally allowed herself to think of what it would be like to have children with him, watching as he taught them to skate, properly hold a stick, shoot pucks.

“No I wouldn’t,” she shook her head as she looked him in the eyes.

He smiled and kissed her chastely on the lips. They continued to watch the episode in a comfortable silence.

"To what do I owe the giant breakfast?" he asked as the credits rolled.

"I had to cook most of the ingredients before they spoiled. And, starting tomorrow I'm working the late shift for the next two weeks. I figured we could have a nice morning together since we probably won't see much of each other," Dulci finished, feeling glum at the idea of not seeing or being near him for an extended period of time. It was times like these she wished their schedules coincided more.

"After that, I'll be in Manhattan for a week," she finished, collecting their plates to take the to kitchen sink.

“What are you going to New York for?” After their conversation the previous evening and their admission during sex, he couldn’t believe she was going to New York.He knew he was probably overreacting.She had to be going there for a reason other than relocating.

“To scope out some potential real estate,” she said, trying to remain serious as she bit back a smile, avoiding eye contact, attempting to joke with him.

“Oh. You think you’re so funny don’t you?”He snuck up behind her, picking her up around her waist, walking her toward the couch.She squealed as he put pressure on her ticklish spots, dumping her with a bounce before climbing on top of her to tickle her more.

“I’m going for a veterinary conference! Please stop!” she yelled through her cackling.When he finally stopped, he kissed her hard and deep, making her gasp into his mouth, taking her breath away.Like the previous night, his actions spoke louder than words.He wanted the kiss to keep her with him in Pittsburgh, and possibly wherever he goes.When the kiss lost it’s intensity and they came up to breathe, Dulci reassured him.

“I meant what I said. I wont leave you,” she whispered, caressing his stubbly face with her hand before continuing their kiss.

His hands were snaked in her hair, holding his weight on his elbows. He could feel her open up, involuntarily pressing her pelvis into his.He rotated his weight to one side, using the other hand to unbutton his own shirt, working agonizingly slow, hoping to drive her crazy with desire.When the shirt was half way undone, enough that she would easily push it aside and expose her breasts, his cellphone rang, and rang, and rang, relentlessly for minutes on end.

“Motherfucker,” he muttered as he lifted off of her.

“I’m sorry. Hopefully this wont take long.It’s probably my agent.”

“It’s ok. Take your time,” she sat up, feeling the heat and moisture between her legs, hoping the call would be over soon.She was going to have sex with him before her meeting with her boss later that day.

Deciding to take the time to do something productive, she opened her computer to check email and go through her junk mail. She went through dozens of store, promotional, Virginia Tech, and Veterinary Economics magazine emails.She couldn’t believe how many emails she could get in a couple of weeks.

One caught her eye. The subject said.“Missed appointment,” and she couldn’t remember making any appointments recently.Opening it, she realized it was an email reminder she set up for Carly, for that appointment.Dulci frantically looked for the date of the email.It was sent the day after her appointment.She quickly ran to the kitchen and grabbed her phone, returning to dial the number.

“Yes. I was wondering if you could tell me whether I had an appointment on the eighteenth and missed it?I can’t remember,” Dulci shook with anticipation, hoping the email was a mistake.

“Your name?”

“Carly MacPherson.”

“Ms. MacPherson, it does look like you missed your appointment, would you like to reschedule it?” Given the nature of the appointment, Dulci couldn’t blame the receptionist for sounding awkward.

“I’ll have to call you back,” Dulci said and hung up, not giving the receptionist a chance to respond.

Did Carly get it done somewhere else? Was she still pregnant?Would she show up at Sid’s door eight months from now with a baby on her hip and ruin everything?Dulci felt so nauseous she could feel the vomit rising. She threw her phone on the couch as she ran to the bathroom, leaning over the toilet, emptying her stomach into the toilet.

What the fuck.

Notes