Sure Feels Right

I never really grew up wanting a tattoo. Yeah, they're pretty cool and some are amazing. It just wasn't my thing, but I had this really good idea. When I was younger, I loved Winnie the Pooh. More than your average child. My dad always told me what Christopher Robin said to Pooh, "You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." So when my family was in town, I had my mom bring me a piece of paper that my father had written the quote down on and I'd be getting it tattooed on my shoulder.
"Nervous?" Rob asked as he sat down on the seat next to mine.
"Kind of. Can't be too horrible." I wiped my sweaty palms on my jeans before taking off my shirt and jacket to reveal a plain black bandeau.
The artist started and I managed to hold up pretty well. Halfway through the second line, Robert got a call.
"Really? Okay. I'll be right there." He stood up and shoved his phone in his back pocket. "Drew is in labor."
I pursed my lips and raised my brow, "So you're going?"
"Well, yeah. Why?"
"Just thought some moral support would be good."
"Beau-"
"I hope Beau has a place for you to sleep tonight if you're seriously thinking about leaving. Actually, I don't care. Go. I'll find something else to do today." I snapped. Maybe I was overreacting, or maybe I wanted my fiance with me during something like this.
He was torn, I could tell. But finally he came to a decision. "Call me when you're done. I love you."
"Yeah. Love you too assfuck." I mumbled. The tattoo artist started to laugh. "Hilarious, isn't it?"
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't be laughing."
"It's fine. I just thought that hey, maybe he would stay with me while I'm getting my first tattoo but I guess not. Had to run to be by his best friend's side while his girlfriend has a child. And I don't have a car. That's awesome."
I shot a text to Katie, seeing if maybe she would be able to pick me up from somewhere downtown since by the time she would read it, I would be done here.
"Can you take a picture of it before taping it up?"
"Sure. Going on facebook?" I'm sure that's what most girls do, they can't wait to post it on every social media site they can.
"No, actually I'm going to send it to my dad first."
I put my shirt on him and tipped him well. He had to put up with my complaining so I felt bad. I walked down to a little cafe and ordered something to drink.
>> Done yet?
<< Fuck off.
"Hey girl, where are you? I'm just leaving the office now."
"The little coffee shop down the road from the place you got your tattoos done."
"Sweet. See you in a few."
>> I'm sorry but Beau needed me here.
<< I'm sorry I'm not tall, tan, and blonde with a nice body.
Robert called me right as Katie pulled up outside, "I'm really sorry you have to hear this."
"I'm sure it can't be much worse than Rachel's screaming sessions with Mr. Perfect."
"Scarlett, I'm sorry. Will you please come to the hospital?"
"No. I refuse. I will not be there for any part of that. I'm always coming in second to Beau."
"That's not true."
"Bullshit. Beau needs this, Beau needs that. Beau needs to man the fuck up. Drew hasn't even given birth yet but you were rushing to his side but whatever."
I hung up the phone and let out the air I had been holding in my lungs.
"Am I just dropping you off at your house?" It was a little too late to ask, she was already turning onto my street.
"Yeah. I'm just going to change and then go to the studio."
"Let me know if you need anything, Scar."
"Will do. Thanks Katie!"
I had intentions on going to the studio, but once I sat down on our couch it was game over. Netflix had won. Besides, I'm pretty sure that there would be other people practicing in there right now.
I heated up some leftovers and plopped down in front of our tv. Robert sent the occasional text, wanting me to the hospital but I did not care to join them. However, I was excited that maybe Drew's hormone levels will even out.
I clicked on Friday Night Lights, starting it on the first episode of the second season. Then my phone started ringing.
"Hi dad." I paused the show, only five minutes into the episode.
"What are you up to?"
"Just watching Friday Night Lights."
"Netflix night with Rob?"
"No," I laughed, "He's at the hospital. We're fighting." Not really fighting, but kind of.
"You put him in the hospital?" I could just imagine the look on my dad's face right now. I'm sure it was priceless.
"No. Bennett's girlfriend is in labor. Robert had to leave me at the tattoo shop to be next to him, so I got pissed."
"Well the tattoo turned out great."
"Yeah, I really like it."
"I just called to say hi, so I'll let you get back to your tv show."
"Okay, I love you."
"Love you too."
After I hung up the phone, I fell asleep during the third or fourth episode. The lack of sleep I had gotten lately was catching up with me.
I woke up around noon the next day, in my own bed. Funny. I didn't remember walking back to the room last night. I got up to get a glass of water from the kitchen. On the dining room table was a big bouquet of tulips. Rob was sleeping on the couch, arm pretty much on the floor and legs almost off the edge. I'm sure he had practice, but judging by the comforter on the floor and the pillows he was using he slept there last night.
"Coming home with a pocket full of tulips. She want to point an arrow at me, no excuses." I quietly sang to myself. "When the day goes, and the night comes, I'll still be your casanova." Wrong lyrics, who cares. Actually, they're the right lyrics for the acoustic version.
I walked back upstairs, not noticing the body on the couch wasn't there anymore. He was in the bedroom, getting changed.
"Scarlett, wait."
"No. No, I don't want to hear what you have to say. I get to be mad. I get to be pissed that you left me to get my tattoo alone. It took 15 more minutes. Fifteen, Robert. Beau would have been fine for that much longer. I'm going to be pissed at you for as long as I possibly can be, because I still cannot believe you left me for him."
I grabbed my headphones from the night stand and started down the hall.
"I'm going back to the hospital." He yelled and I stopped at the top of the stairs. I honestly didn't care where he went as long as he was safe. Just because you're mad at someone doesn't mean you stop loving and caring for them.
"I love you." I could hear him say while he was still in our room.
"I love you too." I mumbled.
I locked myself in the bathroom until I heard him leave. I'm sure he would be gone for a while. Or at least until he was hungry, even then I'm sure he would go get Chipotle for him and Beau. Wouldn't surprise me at all.
>> You aren't supposed to go to bed mad.
<< You were at the hospital and I passed out on the couch. Wasn't waiting up for you.
I changed into a pair of shorts and a tank top, throwing a pair of sweats and a long sleeve shirt over the top. I grabbed a couple bottles of water and a gatorade from the fridge and threw them in my duffel bag.
I hadn't been to the studio in a while. A few months, at least. I'd been busy most of the summer and the first month of grad school was hell.
I hooked my phone up to the speaker and turned on SoMo's album. A little more sexual than I wanted, but every song on it was perfect for dancing. Especially in the kind of mood I was. When Red Lighter came on, I set up the camera and sent my sister a text.
<< You still need a solo for one of your seniors?
I restarted the song and started dancing. I didn't plan a single move, it all just came out.
>> Yeah, why?
<< Just did one to SoMo
>> She's a senior and the farthest thing from liking SoMo.
<< It's not sexual. I recorded it. I'll upload it when I get home and send it to you.
I checked the time and it was already almost four. It was amazing how fast time went by when I was dancing. I called in a to go order from Olive Garden and started heading home. I walked in the door, not expecting Robert to be home and he wasn't. It was my lucky day.
Sitting down at the table, I realized I wasn't sure what I was going to say to Robert when he came home. I wasn't sure that I wanted him to apologize. If he did, that doesn't mean that he was actually going to stop putting Beau before me. Then, I also realized I had eaten all the breadsticks and half of my pasta without noticing.
I put the leftovers away and poured myself a glass of wine. I took a few sips and started swirling the liquid in my glass. The door opened and I looked up to see Robert standing in the doorway.
"Scar. Can we talk?" His voice was low. He was tired, I could tell. I motioned for him to sit down. "Listen. I'm sorry."
I got up, poured the rest of my drink down the drain and walked to the bedroom. I started getting ready, expecting him to just keep talking but he just watched me from the doorway.
"Scarlett."
"What." I snapped.
"Listen to what I'm saying!" He raised his voice. Robert stepped towards me, but I retreated the same distance. "Scarlett, I'm sorry. I should have stayed with you. I know I should have and I'm sorry."
"You keep picking Beau over me and I'm tired of it. I don't care if you make plans with him whenever you want but you will not blow me off for him or I'm done. It's hockey season. I have limited time with you, Robert. I shouldn't have to be sorry for wanting you to stay by my side as much as you can. You are my fiance."
I pulled the oversized sleep shirt over my head and slipped out of my shorts. I let him close the distance between us, hoping - praying - that his touch would somehow make everything okay again.
"I love you and don't want to lose you," he tilted my chin up and lowered his face to mine, "And I can't do this with Beau."
His lips connected with mine and as much as I wanted to pull away and be upset with him, I wanted this more than he did. I tilted my head to deepen the kiss while I placed me hands on the back of his neck, pulling him down to me. Effortlessly, he picked me up and brought me to the bed. He gently set me down and lifted up my shirt, placing kisses on my stomach. Soon, his facial hair was scratching at my inner thigh.
When we were done, I padded into the kitchen for a glass of juice. Robert followed close behind me.
"What did I tell you about wearing a shirt?" I joked, getting two glasses from the cupboard and he grabbed the carton of juice.
"I put on sweats, is that not good enough for you?"
"Guys wearing sweats and nothing underneath is a pretty dangerous thing."
"The same thing can be said about a girl wearing just your shirt." He pulled me into him, placing one hand on the small of my back and taking my left hand in the other.
We were dancing in our kitchen, to no music, at two in the morning.
"I thought you didn't dance."
"I don't." I rested my head against his chest so I could listen to his heart beat.
"But you are."
"Yeah, just for you."

Notes