Sure Feels Right

I sat upside down on Robert's couch, waiting for him to finish cooking. He was dead set on cooking on the grill, even if it meant that he had to wipe the snow off of it.
"Doesn't that give you a head rush?" He called from the kitchen.
"Kinda. But I'm really fucking bored."
"Good thing the food is done."
I rolled off the couch and staggered into the kitchen. I wasn't quite to my chair, but I tried sitting down anyway. Good thing Robert was there to catch me.
"Yeah no more being upside down."
"Soo Kenzie is flying in from Vancouver and I kinda told her we were dating.. So we're going to dinner with her on Thursday," he looked at me with a confused expression that turned into a happy one.
"So we're dating now?"
It had only been a couple weeks since that one night, but calling him my boyfriend just felt right.
"Unless you have a problem with that."
"No. That's great. You're home during your break, right?"
"Yeah. Wait, I mean no. I have to work, why?"
"Beau is going to be in California all that week and I have a few days off.. We could go somewhere. Or we could stay here. If you want to do anything, that is."
"Yeah. I'd love to spend Christmas with you. I was going to be the only one in the house anyway."
I told him what the plans were for the week and that I'd probably be spending a majority of my time with Kenzie. He didn't seem to mind, which wasn't surprising. Now that season was in full swing, the two of us didn't spend much time together. My roommates were happy that I was spending more time with them. though. They acted like I was never around them. Ever.
"So, you can drop me off at my house and I'll go pick up Kenz or you can bring me to the airport and meet her," I slipped the strap of my bag over my head.
"I'll go with you," he grabbed a jacket and locked the door behind us.
"We have to get starbucks, too."
I looked over at Robert while he was driving. He was wearing a backwards snapback with a curl hanging down in the middle of his forehead. There was a part of me that wanted to tell him I loved him. That I needed him. But once I told him, I was pretty much telling him he can hurt me at any point.
"What are you thinking about?"
"That you're pretty attractive," that wasn't a total lie. That all did come from me admiring his face.
"Well thanks. You're not too bad yourself," he winked as he pulled into the parking spot, "You know where we're going?"
"Baggage claim?"
We wandered down the airport to find the carousel that Kenzie's luggage would be on.
"Scarlett!" I heard my best friend scream from probably sixty yards away. It was one of those classic 'We haven't seen each other in a year so we're gonna scream and run towards each other' type of deals.
"I've missed you so much Kenz."
"I've missed you more!"
"Come on, I want you to meet someone," I grabbed her wrist and pulled her back to Robert.
"Wow. You didn't tell me he was a lanky fucker," I immediately started laughing and that earned me funny looks from anyone in a 10 foot radius.
"That's pretty much the first thing I said about him when I saw him," I tried taking a breath, but I just kept laughing. The two of them let me be and Robert went to grab Kenzie's suitcase.
My boyfriend dropped us off at my house and we brought all of her stuff down to my room.
"Is it bad that I want to get so drunk I forget my name."
"I don't know. You're going to be the psychologist," she laughed as she threw her pillow and blanket on my bed.
"Yeah I know.."
"So how long have you two been together?"
"Like together or official?"
"Like together."
"A few months. I think almost four, why?"
"And you still haven't said I love you?" She looked at me like I had two heads.
"He has said it but I haven't."
I didn't realize that was weird. I mean, he knew how I was. He didn't really care. I think as long as I knew he loved me, he was happy. That's all that really mattered. I just wanted him to be happy. I'll fingure out what to do about my happiness later.
I was putting some clothes away when I saw Kenzie playing with something on her hand.
"Wow. That ring is gorgeous," I told her. She looked at me while I processed everything, "Oh my God! Tyler finally popped the question?"
Tyler and Kenzie have been together since high school. He was there through the recovery, the relapses, and the multiple stays in the hospital. We thought he would propose right after Kenzie graduated high school, but apparently he wanted to wait until he graduated college.
"Yeah. Last night," A huge grin appeared on her face, "I would have called you but I wanted to tell you in person."
"I'm so happy for you! How did he do it?"
"Well, he took me for a walk down on the beach, even though it was cold, and we talked for a while. Then he popped the question. It wasn't anything big, but it was just what I wanted," she admired the ring on her finger.
"Come on, I think all the girls are home."
We went upstairs to find my three roommates. Two of which were already drinking and the other was getting all dressed up.
"Where's Rachel going?" I asked as I grabbed a couple beers for me and Kenz.
"Got a hot date with a Pirate."
"Are you guys really drinking? Its only 5:30," Rachel rolled her eyes as she walked into the kitchen with her dress half zipped and one earring in.
"It's five o'clock somewhere," I looked at my phone and acted surprised, "Would you look at that. It's currently five o'clock on Pittsburgh. Cheers."
"Kenzie is here," Katie said, "We are never not drunk by nine when shes here."
That was very true. We all loved when Kenzie was here. We usually go to a baseball game, but since it was almost November, we would be going to a hockey game tomorrow night.
"And we have something to celebrate," Kenzie held up her hand, showing off the large diamond.
Everyone started talking at once and I couldn't handle it, "Okay. I am taking alcohol orders, after you tell me you can go back to freaking out about this awesome news."
I wrote everything down and was out the door. The owner of the liquor store knew what he was doing when he bought it. This was a neighbourhood full of college kids. They usually got business at any point during the week... Even mine on a Tuesday night.
"Wow. You must be serious about this. You grabbed a cart," the kid working at the counter laughed.
"Damn right I'm serious, Smith. I'm never not serious about this kinda stuff."
"So I'm guessing I won't be seeing you in our 8 am tomorrow."
"Nope. I'll be there. Possibly still drunk, but I will be there."
I got back to my house and made everyone help me get the alcohol inside. There was a lot of it. Should make for a fun night...
We were drunk by nine and dancing on the coffee tables by ten. I was having a blast when I lost my footing and landed on the ground. My wrist broke the fall.
"Fuck," I yelled and cradled my arm. The pain was shooting up my left arm. I may be drunk, but I'm sober enough to know it was broken. It felt the same as when I broke my other wrist a few years back, "I need to go to the hospital."
"None of us can drive, unless we call Rachel."
"No. You are not calling her, Katie. You saw how dressed up she was and how excited she looked," I told her and tried not to start crying, "I can call Rob."
Kenz grabbed my phone and handed it to me. I really didn't want to call him, but I had to.
"Babe, its almost 11-"
"I know. I'm sorry I have to call you," My voice started to shake.
"Scarlett, what's wrong?"
"I fell off the table and I need someone to bring me to the hospital. You just have to drop me off and then you can go back to sleep."
"I'll be right there."
I got off the phone and stopped holding back my tears. I wasn't crying because of the pain, well maybe I was. But there was more to it.
"What's wrong?" Katie asked, I think they all caught on that this wasn't just because I would be spending some time in the emergency room.
"I'm stupid," I cried, "Robert loves me and I can't let myself fall for him."
"I hate to tell you this while you're drunk, but you already have," Taylor told me.
"I was around you guys for like 20 minutes, but its obvious that you're in love with him."
Rob walked in just in time to hear the last five words Kenzie spoke. He saw me and looked like he wanted to cry too.
"Let's go."
The fifteen minute drive took only five. He found the closest spot and parked. They brought me to an examination room immediately. Then the questions started.
How many drinks did you have? Eight.
Are you on any medication? No.
What about birth control? No.
What happened? I was being an idiot and dancing to Luke Bryan when I fell off my coffee table and landed on my wrist.
They had Robert leave while they took and x-ray of my arm. When that was over, we were the only two in the room.
"You can go home, I'm fine."
"No, I'm staying here with you," he argued.
"You have a game tomorrow. You need sleep, Robert."
"Making sure you're okay is more important, Scarlett."
"I broke my wrist a few years ago. I'll be fine."
"I'm not worried about your wrist."
I took a deep breath. I knew we would be here for a while, so I might as well tell him.
"Okay. I'm upset because I can't - or won't let myself fall for you and that's so unfair to you that I cant handle it."
"I'm not going to cheat on you or leave you unless you want me to. I promise." I nodded my head. There wasn't much else I could say to that, but I could change my mind. Or force myself to do something, that would scare the shit out of me.
Soon, they put a temporary cast on my wrist and gave me a prescription for pain killers that I couldn't take until I was sober. Getting injured when you're drunk sucks. I'm going to be in pain for a while.
"You can stay at my place tonight and I'll bring you home when I go to practice in the morning and I'll grab the meds on my way home."
"Okay," I whispered. Before we got to his car, I stopped to hug him, "Thank you so much. I love you."
"What brought that up?" Robert was smiling like a little kid in a candy shop.
"Well, I have to let myself fall for you at some point. Why not now?"

Notes