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Stay, Stay, Stay

Another non-chapter to mark 4 years

When I look at the time elapsed since my last chapter posted, I feel sick. I never expected nine months to go by without anything to say, but here I am. I want you all to know that I'm not done as long as you're willing to keep reading. This last year has been a lot for me. I lost the woman who inspired Big Bea, lost a part of myself to someone who was once my best friend but instead broke my heart, and began the final stretch to graduation.

I'm writing my final essay for my degree and preparing for my final exam on Monday and it's a feeling I can't describe. With so much changing and ending I've been terrified to write for my own enjoyment because I know that the more I write the closer I get to having to say goodbye to Beatrice and most of all, you guys. I've never been one to do well with change to begin with, but the last 12 or so months has seen so much that I don't recognize my life half the time. I moved out, got a car, got invited to hockey parties regualrly, ended my tenure working with a team, all things that last year I couldn't have imagined doing. Most of them are good, exciting, major improvements to my life. But at the same time it's all so heavy on my heart.

Anyway, I'll spare those of you who chose to read this from the dribblings of an over stressed student who has fallen into a depression stronger than quick sand and just say that I'm still here. I'm still reading your comments, I'm still thinking about Beatrice, Sidney, Lachlan, Piper, Luna, Serena, and most of all Big Bea every single day. I'm still planning and jotting ideas and praying (to whatever I can find to believe in that day) that I can find my voice again.

I hope you'll be patient with me and please know that your support over the last four years has been unbelievable. Every one of you has helped me through the days and nights when I couldn't see clearly because knowing that these chapters have been read and enjoyed gives me the strength to life my head again.

I'm likely going to regret this emotional and painfully dramatic update, but in this moment I need you to know it's not over. Because if I'm still alive then so is this book.

Happy four years together!

All my heart,

Theodora

Notes

Comments

This was so good!!! I was in tears at the end when thinking about Sid retiring haha

Court31 Court31
2/17/21

Beautiful story.

Aleja21 Aleja21
10/29/18

This story was great and very relatable because of the beliefs that Bea and I share. You really captured the struggle of being in a relationship and making a marriage work. Keep up the good work and don't stop writing. :)

RoxPensChick RoxPensChick
9/17/17

@melindaone
I'm so glad you enjoyed it!!! Thanks for sticking through and reading :D :D



TheoAirplane TheoAirplane
9/11/17

Well, that was sooo good. I loved their story. I still do. Their love, strenght, humor..this all made me fall in love. So thank you for a chance to be a part of K.C. family.

melindaone melindaone
9/8/17