I threw myself onto my bed, my head spinning; trying desperately to process the events that had just unfolded. I broke up with derek. Derek and I were done.

Oh, and I finally admitted to myself i was in love with my best friend... That.

That topped the list of things making my head spin, that's for sure. The more I thought about it, the less upset I was about Derek and I being done. Sure, I had liked him a lot; but things started getting weird once he kept bringing up my friendship with Jamie. He was jealous and insecure; our relationship never would have worked. I could never cut Jamie out of my life; ever.

I closed my eyes, pulling the blankets over my head, shielding myself from the world. Right now all I ever wanted to do was lay here and never wake up. I wanted Jamie to be here. To help me through this; to comfort me; to kiss-

Fuck. I thought to myself miserably. I was friend zoned; how was I going to escape? Jamie had only ever seen me as a friend; fuck I even have told him I thought of him as a brother! I guess I was just in denial all this damn time...

Thanks for the update.. I'm sorry for making you miss your breakfast date with Derek! I feel bad

I smiled to myself; I was glad Jamie had made it safely in St. Louis.

Hey, don't worry about it. Youre more important than some breakfast. :)

My heart beat a little faster when I typed out the message; this time when I said it, I hoped he would understand I didn't mean in just a friendly manner.

That means a lot, thanks. I hope you're ok though- the phone call didn't sound that good

Good ol Jamie; always concerned about me. I figured I better tell him that Derek and I were done...

Yeah, I'm ok. I dumped his sorry ass earlier this morning

I shuddered at the memory of our conversation just this morning. I was shocked; I couldn't believe he had the nerve to ask me to pick between the pair of them. It wasn't fair!

What? I'm so sorry Hales. I really hope it's not because of me :(

I smirked to myself; I guess it was kind of his fault, in a twisted way. But I by no means blamed him; don't get me wrong!

It's not your fault Jame! He's the asshole. He told me I needed to choose between having you as a friend or dating him... safe to say I think we know what I chose ✌️

I typed out my reply, telling him the jist of our conversation. If it happened again, regardless of who I was dating; I'd choose Jamie again in a heartbeat.

Wow Haley that means more to me than anything in the world :)

His words caused me to giggle to myself happily. I fucking giggled to myself; what the hell? Frig, I really needed a girl to talk to about this...

good luck tonight- score me a goal :)

I texted Jamie quickly before getting up off of my bed. I needed to hang out with one of my only girl friends.

I need your advice!

I threw my phone on the bed, thinking it would take her awhile to answer; I was wrong.

Why what's up??

I smiled to myself.

Do you have a minute? It's about Jamie

In what seemed like seconds after I sent the message my phone began to ring vigorously in my hand.

"That was fast" I answered the phone with a chuckle.

"Did you finally dump Derek and start to date Jamie??" She asked quickly.

"Where in the hell did that come from?" I asked, highly surprised. Her statement caught me completely off guard.

"Oh come on Haley don't play dumb with me" she teased lightly.

"Yeah well Derek and I are done" I muttered, the first part of her statement being true.

"Are you ok?" She asked, a little surprised. "I know how much you like him"

"Honestly I'm not as upset as I thought I would be" I shrugged it off. So I explained to her why. Why Derek and I were done; why he made me choose; everything. I guess the only thing left to tell her was-

"So you finally admitted it to yourself then" she sighed happily. "I always thought you guys would be a good couple"

"Well that's why I need your advice. How can I make him see me in a girlfriend way instead of just a friendly way?" I was no good at this shit. I didn't know how I was ever going to accomplish such a feat.

"Come to my office tomorrow; ill help you out" she replied after a moment of thought. "I've gotta get back to work though; I'll se you tomorrow?" I looked at the time, realizing she was probably just finishing off her lunch break.

"Yeah, I will. Thanks Erica" I called before he pair of us hung up the phone.

Horrible. Painful. Long. Gruelling.

Those are some of the words to describe my day. After breaking up with Derek, things just seemed to go from bad to worse. Showing up to work the next day, after barely getting any sleep and running into him, by the time 5 o'clock rolled around I was about ready to collapse into bed. But, I knew I couldn't; I had to watch Jamie and the Stars potentially win their way to the conference finals! I had all the faith in the world in them; I just hope they could out play the Blues.

Running into Derek had been extremely awkward. Well, it seemed it for me at least.

"Well, well, well... Come crawling back so soon?" The voice I had dreaded to hear rang out. I closed my eyes, willing for the day to be over with already.

"I work here, remember?" I added back, a hint of annoyance in my voice. 8 am was not a time I wanted to deal with him; not that any point in time was..

"Right" he muttered, as if he had honestly forgotten.

"Look, I know things didn't work between us but can we at least be civil?" I asked hopefully. It was strange, seeing him at work. I had tried to mentally prepare myself for it; but to no avail.

He simply grunted in response, shoving his way past me forcefully.

I rolled my eyes, continuing my way to Erica's office. It didn't take me long to get there; and I was grateful. Hopefully she gave me the advice I needed to wow Jamie and get him to see me in a different way.

"I see Derek was out there" Erica rolled her eyes once I stepped into the safety of her office.

"Unfortunately" I mumbled, sitting down on the chair across from her desk. "I asked him if we could at least be civil but of course he won't be" I added with a frown.

"Are you surprised?" Erica asked with an eyebrow raised. "You chose Jamie over him; of course he's going to be a little pissed off"

"It's his own damn fault" I muttered miserably. "If he didn't ask me to choose none of this would have happened" I reminded her. And it was true; the only reason I even broke it off was because of his stupid insecurities.

"This is better though" Erica reminded me, trying to remain positive. "Jamie is a much better guy, in like every single way"

"I know" I smiled happily to myself, blushing when she caught me thinking about him.

"Ask him out"

"Wait, what?" I crinkled my forehead in confusion.

"Just take the plunge!" Erica instructed with a grin.

"I can't do that! What about our friendship!?" I asked with a frown. "If he doesn't feel the same way I don't want to make this awkward for us" I reminded her. My biggest fear was confessing my feelings, only to be rejected. Would that be the end of our friendship?

"So are you just going to spend forever wishing you'd make a move?" She asked worriedly.

"Well- yeah I guess so" was my only reply.

"So when he brings random girls home from the bar, that won't bother you?"

"Erica-"

"Or when he gets a girlfriend, and you know it'll happen; I mean look at him! That won't bother you either?" Her words stung; and I knew she was right.

"Fine, fine I know!" I said, exasperated, throwing my hands up in the air. "But can I at least wait until after the playoffs?" I asked with a sigh.

"I'm not telling you you have to do it now. You can take as much time as you need! Just remember he won't wait forever"

I knew he wouldn't wait forever; I had to make a move. I just had no idea how I'd manage that

Notes