Work seemed to tick by slower and slower every single time I tore my eyes from the screen and onto the small clock that hung on my office wall. Being so wrapped up in playoff hockey, Erica and I hadn't had a chance to look into my potential job change just yet; guess this meant I was stuck for now. Oh well.
With a skip I practically ran out of my office come 5 o'clock. I had places to be, and a boyfriend to see. He seemed to be a lot less tense than he was the previous few nights. Maybe he was beginning to see him acting like a jerk wasn't going to win his team games.

Game six was here in Dallas tomorrow night. Another do or die situation. But with any luck, they could force a game seven. And I could honestly say nobody would have seen that one coming. Not after the first two terrible games. Not after their average season barely squeaking in the playoffs.
I hurriedly ran into my apartment, just wanting to get over to see Jamie. I suddenly remembered he seemed a little tense after coming from the bathroom. Maybe that had to do with what we were going to talk about over dinner.

I smiled; he was making me dinner. I hopped in the shower, washing the stress of my day off. I knew I didn't have to impress him but I still liked to look nice. So after doing my hair and make up, throwing on a pair of black skinny jeans and a nice shirt, I found myself walking over to Jamie's apartment.
I knocked on the door.

Jamie always told me I could just walk right in, but after the first time I did and found him banging one of his previous girlfriends on the couch, I made it a point to knock. You never knew what kind of shit people do in their homes when nobody was around.

He answered the door, a smile on his gorgeous face. He wore a pair of green oven mitts, and an apron that read “kiss the cook”. Guess I could oblige, I thought with a grin.

“Hey beautiful” he greeted, ushering me inside.

“Smells great in here” I commented, the pair of us making our way into his kitchen.

“I've never made this before, it's Tyler's mothers recipe” he bit his lip nervously, eyeing whatever it was in the oven with a confused expression.

“What is it you're making?” I asked curiously. Whatever it was, it smelled nothing short of amazing.

“Chicken cordon bleu” one of my favourites. My dad always used to make it. Just the thought of them sent a rush of sadness through me. I guess you could say I was pushing the emotions of him dying to the side. I couldn't afford to break down. Not now. Not ever, really; but right now I had other things to worry about.

“Can't wait to try it” I tried to hide the breaking in my voice. I hoped he hadn't heard, but of course I was wrong. He looked up to me, sympathy in his beautiful eyes. I knew the last couple weeks hadn't been easy on either of us. Maybe we were both being stubborn and being strong for each other. I smiled; I loved him more than anything.

“Haley…” He trailed off, finally taking the finished product from the oven. I noticed some garlic mashed potatoes in a pot next to a small pot of corn; he knew how to spoil his girlfriend, that was for sure.

“You don't have to say it” I held up my hand, not wanting to hear a sympathy spiel. “Do you have red wine?” I felt like drinking a few glasses might help.

“Of course” he answered, dropping the subject… For now. I knew it was only a matter of time before he would bring it up again.

We set ourselves up with plates, and by that I mean Jamie did. He was a complete gentleman; part of the reasons I fell in love with him in the first place. And despite all the hurt that was currently going through my head, I smiled. And it was genuine.

“Whatcha thinking about?” Jamie asked, noticing my sudden change in demeanour.

“You” I answered with a coy smile.

“Me?’ He asked, a small creep creeping on his lips.

“Mhm” I answered in the midst of drinking my wine.

“What about me?” He asked with a smirk.

“Well a lot of things really” I sighed; a happy sigh. “But mostly about how much I love you, and how incredibly lucky I am to be with you. How a few months ago I never would have imagined this. But I'm so glad it did” I grinned, starting to also feel a little emotional.

“I love you too Haley” he grinned, grabbing my hand from his place at the table. “And I think I'm the lucky one. I can't believe how lucky I am to be with you” he answered back. Then of course, I couldn't hold the tears any longer. I bawled.

We sat at the kitchen table, his strong arms wrapped around me protectively. Every so often he squeezed me a little tighter, kissing the top of my head lightly as he did so. It felt like forever we were sitting there, but eventually I pulled away, looking into my incredible boyfriends eyes, and smiling through the tears I had shed.

“I don't know what I'd do without you.” I told him, kissing his lips lightly.

“You'll never have to find out, my love” he answered back with a sweet smile. I wiped the tears away Jamie had missed before composing myself and the pair of us finished the amazing supper he had cooked.

“Seriously Jamie, that was delicious” I told him as we both decided to get cleaning the kitchen out of the way.

“Thanks, I hope you liked it” he answered a bit nervously. Right. Something was up with him earlier. Time to find out now.

“I did” I smiled, hugging into his side. “Something was up with you at lunch today” I blurted out. Smooth Haley, really fucking smooth.

“Yeah, I wanted to talk to you about that’ he bit his lip nervously. He kissed my temple, pulling me in for a hug. “Promise not to be mad at me?”

“Of course”

“Promise not to hate me?”

“Jame I could never had you” I told him. He was kind of beginning to worry me. “Just tell me.” I instructed, pulling us away from the hug and heading to the couch, where talks always seemed to be more comfortable.

“Please don't be mad” he said again, a guilty expression on his face.

“Jamie…”’I trailed off with a scowl. He was really beginning to worry me. What the hell could have possibly happened in the bathroom of the restaurant that would make him come back so tense?

“I saw someone in the bathroom” he told me softly. “Not a girl, not like that” his eyes went wide upon seeing the expression on my face. Thank god. I wasn't sure what I would do if he was seeing somebody else.

“Who?” I asked when he didn't continue. Trying to rack my brain I attempted to think of who it could possible be. A teammate? Wouldn't really make sense. Derek? Fuck he better not have been there.. It was the only logical person that would make sense.

“Josh”

The name caused me to wince slightly.

“Josh as in- my brother?” I asked with anger. How fucking dare he track Jamie down. After everything he's done. To me, to my dad?

“Uh- yeah”

“What did he have to say?” I asked angrily, a scowl replacing the worry on my face. I don't think I ever could have predicted the next words to come out of Jamie's mouth.

“I think you should talk to him”

“Are you out of your fucking mind!?” He winced at the level my voice took; but I didn't care. There was no way in hell I was ever going to forgive him. There was no way I was ever going to speak to him.
“I just- hear me out” he pleaded, a desperate look on his face.

“There's nothing to discuss about it, Jamie” I huffed. “I never want to speak to him again. And I'd appreciate it if you didn't go behind my back and start taking his goddamn side in this” I exploded.

“Nobody said I was taking his side, Haley; I just think you should hear him out” he defended. “He's said he's gone to AA meetings, he's been sober for two years now- even volunteers with MAAD!” He exclaimed calmly.

“I'm not interested in hearing him out. Or hearing about what life changes he's supposedly made” I spat back. “I can't believe you” I muttered, mostly to myself.

“You can't believe me? You can't believe I'm choosing to see the good in him? That I'm choosing to believe everyone deserves a second chance?” He was mad now too. “If anything, I can't believe you. He's your fucking family. And hating him isn't going to bring your dad back, Haley”

“Don't bring my fucking dad into this” I growled. “He's got nothing to do with this” I reminded him forcefully.

“You know it is Haley” he replied back, with equal amount of anger.

“This is about my brother. He almost killed my fucking dad because he decided drinking mid day was a smart idea. He decided that driving while intoxicated was a smart idea. How can you expect me to forgive him for that?” I near shouted.

“But he didn't die! He was fine!” Jamie reminded me forcefully. “And he made a mistake, Haley. Everyone makes mistakes- it's what we learn from them that defines us” I rolled my eyes at his attempt at being philosophical.

“That's a pretty big fucking mistake to make” I shook my head. The pair of us were both standing up from the comfort of the couch, anger in both our eyes. I didn't understand. I didn't understand any of this.

“Don’t act like you're so fucking perfect, we all make mistakes” he muttered back. “Your dad wouldn't want this”

I winced at his words, my eyes wide. I felt the tears begin to form at the mere thought of my father. Maybe he was right. Maybe I was hating him even more now that my dad was gone. But Jamie was right in one sense; he was my family. And he was the only goddamn family I had left.

My eyes stayed planted on the ground, my head swirling with different thoughts and scenarios. What would I even say to him? What would he say to me? Is what Jamie saying true? Or is it just something my brother is coming up with? It made no sense though, why would he-

“Haley, talk to me” his voice lowered, his anger subsiding. He looked at me with concern; I knew I was in the wrong here. I guess another reason I fell in love with Jamie; he could always see the good in people. I had a growing admiration for that.

“I'm sorry, you're right” I murmured, never liking to admit to being wrong. “I'll talk to him”

“You will?” He asked, a little taken aback.

“I will” I nodded, sliding my arms around his waist and pulling him close to me. “I'm sorry I'm so stubborn sometimes” I added, taking in his comforting scent. He chuckled, kissing the top of my head the way that always seems to make all my worries melt away.

“You wouldn't be you if you weren't stubborn” he laughed, and I guess I had to agree with that. “Just remember, you don't have to be strong all the time”

At his words, I allowed myself to break down.

Notes

Sorry I took so long to update!!

Thanks for reading :)