“You can say what you wanna, take what you wanna, choose the moods that you fake when you want. You said your life needed something special that you don’t have…”


Out of all the teams that had ever clinched a playoff spot, the team seemed to be the least thrilled about it. Of course they wanted to go to post-season and fight for the Stanley Cup, but they weren’t stupid. They had clinched only because another team lost. They didn’t clinch because they had pulled out a massive win, they clinched because another team sucked a little more. That wasn’t the way team wanted to get to postseason. If they didn’t start winning, they were looking ata quick playoff run.

Marco was excited, sure. They all were. But they also knew that they were going up against tough teams in the first round. As it stood, they were looking at being on the road in Dallas to start. The Stars had been at the top of the league the entire year, beating the Wild four out of the five games they played this season. Marco knew that it was going to be tough sledding for them. No one was just going to hand them the Stanley Cup.

There were only a couple days before postseason started. At that point the team would be in constant movement, going in and out of town every couple days. Marco wanted to spend as much time with Sofia as possible. If things went well, he might not be home consistently until June.

He was propped up on the floor against the couch with Sofia in his lap. They were facing each other, Marco mumbling playfully as Sof reached for his mouth and tried to hold onto his lips. He shook his head and tilted it backwards to get her hands away from his mouth. When he looked back down at her, she was giggling, her little shoulders bouncing up and down.

Marie came out with two plates of waffles, which would serve as dinner for the night. Breakfast for dinner had become sort of a tradition to them. She sat down beside Marco and handed him a plate.

Marco turned his fork to cut into the crispy outer part, pulling it towards his chest gently as Sofia lunged at it. “No, questo è per me,” No, this is for me.

“No…” She reached for his plate again, but Marie picked her up and set Sof in her lap.

“Daddy needs that to be strong so he can bring home a big silver cup,” Marie smiled and pressed her lips to Sofia’s forehead. At the same time, Sofia brought her fingertips up to her lips and tapped them gently. It was her way of telling them that she wanted some.

Marie cut up a small piece of the waffle, devoid of syrup, and handed it to Sofia. She immediately brought it up to her mouth and gummed at it. In no way was she a picky eater; she got that from her father. Both Marie and Marco watched as she had her first bit of waffle. Her face was one of pure pleasure and Marie stabbed at a piece of waffle for herself.

Sof had already had her dinner and was just about ready for bed. They tried to get her to go down at the same time each night, as a way of keeping a routine in order. Some nights she fussed, mostly just wanting to hang out with the most important people in her life. But somewhere around nine, she began to melt down and Marie knew it was time to get her in her crib.

Marco held his hands out to her and kissed her gently, before handing her back to Marie and watching her go to the nursery. He continued to pick at his food, only looking back up when Marie returned to the floor. She picked up her plate and finished off the rest of her food, leaning over to rest her head on Marco’s shoulder. He tilted his head down to acknowledge her and then carried their plates into the kitchen.

Marie took the moment to move onto the couch, and covered herself with a throw blanket as Marco came back to sit with her. He cradled her feet in his lap and pressed his fingertips into the soles of her feet.

“Can you believe we’re here? From that pub in Montreal to engaged with a kid… How’d that ever happen for us?” It nearly came out as a whisper because Marie could hardly believe this was how her life had turned out.

“It happened because I was lucky enough to find an amazing woman that bought into my nice guy act. After I impregnated her, I knew she wasn’t going anywhere,” he chuckled softly.

“You’re such a prick,” she smiled and kicked his chest gently. “You really are. You make me question why I stick around,”

Marco ran his hands up her legs, “you know I need you. I’d be living in this place alone, spending my nights with the boys, wishing I had someone to go home to. You’ve been the best thing that’s happened in my life since I got drafted.”

“Oh good to know I’m still coming in short of hockey. I see where I stand in your eyes,”

He smiled and grabbed at her knee as she offered a subtle smirk, “nothing in this whole wide world is better than you and Sofia. The league could offer me eight million a year, and I wouldn’t want a cent of it if I couldn’t have you. Nothing matters but you and Sof. At this point, hockey’s a luxury that I’m lucky to have. A family with you is what’s actually important,”

Marie leaned forward and cradled his head in her hands, and kissed his lips quickly. She squeezed his cheeks playfully, “you always say the right stuff.”

“It’s easy to come up with when it’s the truth.”

She curled over and rested her head against his shoulder, clutching onto his hand tightly. In five months to the day, they’d be standing in front of a hundred people, getting married. It hadn’t even been two years since they met, and sure they lived an accelerated lifestyle, but this was a lot for anyone to take in.

The first round proved to be a push, like everyone thought it would be. But no one could’ve guessed that the first game would turn out as a shutout for the Stars. The Wild couldn’t get anything going. Maybe that was due in part to Zach going down, but Marco had mentioned in passing that every guy needed to pull through now. When your leading scorer goes down, you don’t have time to wait for him to come back in playoffs. It was a push.

Again, because of the draw and their playoff position, the team never got out of the first round. This year, Marco had told Marie she didn’t even have to travel for the games. Instead of flying back and forth between St. Paul and Dallas as she would have, even with Sofia, it was like Marco didn’t think it’d be worth the trouble. Even though no one really liked to admit it, maybe he just sort of knew that this wasn’t going to be their year.

The only good part about the situation was that finally Marco would be home. That’s all she wanted. Sofia was getting to the point where she needed constant supervision and attention. Marie never wanted to leave her with the babysitter for too long, but there was no way in hell she’d be spending the days in the kitchen at Scandy’s.

It may have only been April, but they wouldn’t stay in St. Paul for too long. Once Marco passed his exit physical, they’d pack up whatever they needed for a couple months in Montreal, and would head up there until July. The bachelor and bachelorette parties would take place in New York. The guys that would be attending Marco’s agreed that New York was centrally located, and Marie figured that was closer to Lizzie and Jess anyways.

By August, they planned to be back in Minnesota. With a wedding date of early September, Marie wanted finalize everything well in advance. Plans were continuing to be made, invitations would be delivered while in Montreal, but alterations on the dress would have to cease until the end of summer. They were so close to having it fit perfectly.

---

It was never going to be easy, but Marco crouched down and placed one hand on the marble of his father’s headstone. Because of his service in the military, he was buried in the veteran’s cemetery. Marie hung back with Sofia to allow Marco a moment to come to terms with whatever he was feeling. While he seemed to be keeping it all in, she was the one to tear up.

Sofia watched her tears well up, and reached for her face, “no...”

Marie sniffled and grabbed hold of Sofia’s outstretched hand. For almost nine months, she was pretty perceptive of emotion… in terms of crying. At the sound of her voice, Marco turned around and stood back up to approach them. He looked composed, but Marie released a shaky sigh.

Marco lifted Sofia with a throaty groan, and secured her in the crook of his arm. With his free hand, he took one of Marie’s and lifted it to his mouth. “Andiamo vedere nonno,” Let’s go see grandpa.

They all approached the grave and Marco knelt down again. He set Sofia on her feet in front of him, and reached out for the headstone. She mumbled words only she knew the meaning, and with her fingers touching the engravings, she twisted her head to look back at Marco, “no no.”

He offered at tight-lipped smile and pulled her back into his arms. He was sitting down now, with his knees bent, and Sof standing between his legs. Marie dropped down and sat beside him and reached over to squeeze his thigh gently. He looked over at her and leaned in to kiss her quickly, nipping at her bottom lip softly. When they pulled back, Marie lifted her hand and brought it to the back of Marco’s neck, gently scratching her fingers through the base of his scalp. Sofia tugged away from Marco and tottered back to the headstone, sat down in front of it and consumed herself with the grass.

“You alright?” Marie whispered. She pulled her hand away from his head and leaned in to kiss his shoulder.

He looked over at her and nodded. “I didn’t think I’d see his name in marble so soon. A year ago I thought I’d have him forever,”

“Wish I could’ve traded my dad for yours,”

Marco chuckled and cupped his hand around her head, pulling her closer to him so he could kiss her temple. At the same time, Sofia turned around and called out for him. Her high-pitched voice went off on a rant and all Marco could do was stare at her. He smiled and nodded like he knew what she was saying, and then she turned back to the grave and touched it again.

With his head cocked to the side, he continued to watch Sof, even though she was no longer paying attention to him. “You’re a great mother. I know you put a lot of pressure on yourself, but you’ve already done an amazing job with Sofia. I want to have another kid with you… now,”

“Like right at this moment,” Marie smiled and looked around the cemetery.

“Maybe not right here, on top of my father’s grave, but soon. I don’t want to wait. I want to wake up and cook you breakfast, and… you said you couldn’t explain the feeling, and neither can I. But seeing you pregnant and knowing I did that, and knowing that you were going to have a kid… our kid… it was so gratifying. I want that again. With you,”

“I want it with you too. You know that. Just let me get through the wedding baby-free, and I promise we can get straight to it on the wedding night.” Marie grabbed onto his arm again, “I think you just need to focus on this right now. On this, and your family, and just being able to cope with this. You don’t have to pretend like it doesn’t hurt,”

“I don’t want to dwell on it. He’s been gone for nearly five months. I had time. I don’t want to go back to that,” he leaned forward and pressed his forehead to hers. “I’m just glad I have you… And that you’re here, supporting me like always.”

Notes

"Glad" by Tyler Hilton.

Lemme know what y'all think about where this is going! And I hope you're still enjoying this!