The Cabin by the Lake

Zac answered the door with a smile. “Hey future roomie!” I laughed as Sam and I walked in. “I haven’t decided yet.” I said with a snooty tone and he laughed. Sam ran around the apartment, and finally went on the couch to lay down. “This this is Sam?” Zac sat down next to him, and Sam cuddled right up to him. I laughed, “You look so ridiculous with such a small dog next to you.” Zac nodded, “He’s no Diesel, but he’s still cute.” I smiled and looked around the apartment. Zac pointed to a room, “That would be your room.” I walked in the room. It was empty, but I could picture how everything would fit. I stood against the wall I would put my bed, I had a clear view of Zac’s room. I sat on the floor and a few seconds later Sam ran in and jumped into my lap. I pet his soft ears and his tail wagged. Zac leaned against the door, “So, what do you think?” He smiled at me, and I smiled back. “We have to redecorate…but I guess it’ll work.” I winked at him and he rolled his eyes. He bent down and Sam ran to him, “I think it’ll all work out.” Zac said more to Sam than to me. I just hoped feelings didn’t start to come up…

Zac and Ryan helped me move my stuff from my old apartment to my new one. Casey and Sarah were at the old apartment talking about wedding stuff. I knocked on Casey’s bedroom door, and they both looked at me. “I’m almost all moved out…” Casey smiled, “This is good for us!” I nodded. “What are you two up to?” I asked, walking in. Sarah laughed, “Engagement stuff, but you wouldn’t understand.” I nodded as my heart shattered a little. We never excluded each other from anything. “Anything I can help with?” Casey shook her head, “Well…actually we do have one question for you…” I smiled and sat on her bed, “Anything!” They looked at each other, “Well…have you gotten that estimate yet?” My whole body froze, I think I smiled, but I’m not sure. “Not yet.” I felt my head nod. “If I’m the photographer…how will I be in the wedding?” They looked at each other. “Well…we thought about it…and we think we might be each other’s maid of honor since our weddings will be kind of close to each other.” I felt my head nod again. “I’ll do some research and see what the budget would be…I’ll get back to you.” They smiled and clapped, “Thanks girl!” I got up, and saw Ryan walk into the apartment, signaling that everything was packed. I didn’t say goodbye. I didn’t tell them I was leaving. I just left.

Ryan helped me unpack my things, but my head was in a cloud. I wasn’t going to be in my best friends’ weddings? I felt Ryan’s hand on my shoulder, “you okay?” I sat on my not made bed, and he sat next to me. “Casey and Sarah want me to be their photographer for their weddings…” He smiled, “That’ nice!” I shrugged, “I’m not in their weddings though…I thought I would be…” He put his arm around me, “I’m sure you’ll still get to do the bridal showers and stuff?” I shrugged, “I’ll probably just be the photographer.” He kissed the side of my head, “you’ll be okay babe.” He stood up, “Are you good here?” I looked up at him, “I guess…you have somewhere to go?” He nodded, “Just helping out another friend. I’ll text you later?” I nodded, he kissed me then left. I sat on my bed holding a picture of me, Casey, and Sarah from our first weekend together in college. We all looked like hot messes. I heard a tap and saw Zac, “Let me guess, you’ve got a friend that you’d rather be with too?” He sat next to me, “You are the friend I’d rather be with.” He helped me make my bed, hang pictures, set up my desk, and he helped me put away some of the kitchen supplied I had. He sat at the island that separate the kitchen form the living room, and helped me unwrap my mugs and cups from bubble wrap. I vented to him about Casey and Sarah keeping me out of things because I wasn’t engaged, and I even vented that I was a little pissed Ryan left too. “I sound so stupid.” He shook his head, “You moved out, and they didn’t bat an eyelash. You moving into a big chapter in your life, and your boyfriend wasn’t here to really be with you for it…” I nodded, holding my favorite Christmas mug in my hand. “But it’ll all work out, it’ll all be okay.” I smiled and put the mug down.

The snow fell around me as I walked around the streets of Boston. I had my camera in hand. The first snow day of the year, and kids were everywhere. I loved to take pictures of the public enjoying, or hating the snow. The plows haven’t come by yet, which made Boston look like a pure blanket of white. Christmas was only a week away, my favorite time of year. I would go around asking parents or nannies if I could photograph them and their children, I then give them my contact information so they can obtained the photos; it sort of sounds creepy, but I promise it’s not! I saw Casey and Amanda embracing each other from across the way, I pick up my camera close to my face and took a few shots. I walked over, catching their attention. “Hey Ems, how are you?” I shook my cast and smiled, “Comes off tomorrow! But, I want to show you something.” They looked through the pictures with tears in their eyes. “If you don’t have an engagement photo yet, I think this one would be perfect.” I showed them a photo where Casey’s ring was in view, the snow swirled around them like magic, and their smile said it all. Casey wrapped me in a hug, “thank you.” They bought me a hot chocolate while they filled me in with their Valentine’s Day wedding, it was soon, but it would be a small celebration. I agreed to be the photographer for free, I wasn’t feeling bitter today. Something about snow and Christmas time makes my soul happy.

“So, what are the Christmas plans?” I smiled at Casey as I finished my s’mores hot chocolate. “Ryan is visiting his family, and I’m going to the cabin for some much needed me time.” She nodded, “So you’re not meeting Ryan’s family yet?” I shook my head, “Not yet…after his interaction with my dad and then my mom…” Casey almost spit her latte out. “Wait, what?” I bit my lip, “Right…I forgot to mention something…” Casey called Sarah for a much needed girls night, and of course at my new place. I texted Zac to warn him.

Me: I know I just moved in…Casey and Sarah are coming over…we may get drunk…
Zac: Just no pillow fights with my pillows…or spying on men and their dogs ;)

We sat on the couch, the girls aweing the new apartment. The fireplace was going, the TV was playing Love, Actually and we sipped our red and white wines. I filled the girls into a PG version of Ryan, my dad, and my mom. I missed this…just us time like back in college. Although back then we would YouTube a fireplace because we never had a real one. After 2 bottles deep in wine, we were giggling at Hugh Grant, and cat calling Liam Neeson. I heard the door open and Zac walk in. “Oh right…I forgot you lived here.” I gave him a wink and he laughed, “Then I guess you girls don’t want the food Ryan and I picked up?” The smell of Chinese food wafted in through the bags the two boys were holding. “Or the desserts Eric and Amanda picked up?” Ryan said, and the two had Mike’s Pastry boxes. “I have the best people in my life.” I said as I put my arms around Zac and Ryan. We dished out the Chinese, and sat on the floor in the living room, laughing with each other. This…this is what the holidays are about. Being with the people we love the most. I looked around the room at my friends, being cozy with their significant others. Ryan kissed my cheek and got up to use the bathroom. I leaned back on my hands, one landing on one of Zac’s. I looked over at him and he smiled, not moving his hand and me not moving mine.

I hugged my friend’s goodbye and happy holidays and would be seeing them at new years to welcome 2016. I grabbed another cannoli and sat between Zac and Ryan. “So…he fires her…because he loves her?” I nodded at Ryan, “But then he goes after her, not knowing if she’ll talk to him or not.” Ryan shrugged, “Chick flicks man. They make no sense.” Zac shrugged, “I get it.” He got up, “I’d go door to door for a girl if I loved her that much.” Ryan put his arm around me, “Thank god I don’t have to.” Zac smiled, “I just hope no carolers come to your door.” He winked at me, and Ryan shrugged, “I’d just tell them to piss of or something.” I laughed at the reference Zac was making that Ryan was missing. “Are you meeting the Spooner family this Christmas?” Zac asked as he sat on the couch next to me with a cannoli. “Not yet, I’m going to the cabin.” Zac nodded, “We could car pool?” Ryan nodded, “I like that idea. Thinking about this one driving alone to Canada? I don’t like it.” I rolled my eyes, “My car is fine!” Zac laughed, “Your car can’t drive smoothly on a warm sunny day let alone icy roads.” I took his cannoli and bit into it before giving it back. “Fine, but I get control of the radio.” Ryan and Zac looked over at each other and I laughed, “Country every hour.” Ryan grabbed Zac’s arm, “it was nice knowing you.” I shoved him, “it’s not that bad!” They glanced at each other, and laughed. I was missing their joke, but I loved being between them. I loved watching the ending of Love, Actually and singing how Christmas is all around us for the rest of the night. I finally loved where I was in life, and I think this Christmas will be a great prequel to 2016; the year I get my shit together.

Notes

Thank you to all <3