AUTUMN LEAVES

“Why?”, he asked her. Taylor looked confused by his question. “Autumn, where is she?”, he clarified. “Oh Autumn, Autumn. What’s with you and Autumn anyway?”, Taylor asked annoyed. She realized that she struck a nerve when she saw how flustered her brother looked. He looked at his hands. “Sidney”, Taylor said more softly realizing how distraught her brother looked. “Don’t worry about it. It doesn’t matter Tay”. “That you obviously have feelings for her?”, she asked him with concern. He looked at his sister in surprise. “Is it that obvious?”.

“You’re my brother, I know you. Not that I’ve seen you this taken by a woman before, but I have noticed how much you care about her and I saw how you look at her. Sid, this is bad. You know that though, don’t you?”, Taylor hesitantly asked, insinuating that Autumn should be off-limit. “Not that it matters now. She’s married. She married Mario. I will move on, don’t worry”, he said as he squeezed her shoulders reassuringly. Sidney sighed as he looked back at the serene lake.

Shimmers of lights danced happily with the water current. The trees and bushes swayed to the soft breeze. The calm scenery contrasted the turmoil inside his head. Even nature was against him, he thought gloomily. Happy laughs could be heard from a distance. Sidney felt, for the first time, that he was unhappy and that his life was not fulfilling. He had hockey. His friends and family, sure. Nothing else. Most of his friends are married now and his family was far. If his hockey career ends tomorrow, he will have nothing. He will be alone. He felt dumb for having just realized this. Before he could contemplate this dark thought any further, Taylor broke the silence.

“Tiffany said she’s been missing for the last 20 minutes. People are starting to wonder. Including Mario. She was coming to ask you if you’ve seen her but I told her I’d talk to you while she keeps looking”.

*****

“Oh, thank god!”, Tiffany said, relieved when she found Autumn sitting in Sidney’s office. Relief was quickly replaced by concern as she noticed that Autumn has been crying. She was crying on her wedding night. That can’t be good, Tiffany thought. “What happened? What’s wrong Auttie?”, she asked her as she kneeled in front of her friend and half-sister. Autumn wiped at her eyes, trying to control her tears. “It’s been an emotional day, that’s all.”

“Are you thinking about dad again?”. Autumn nodded, while dabbing at her wet nose with a cloth. “Sweetie, I know it’s hard. I wish he is still with us too. I wish he would walk me down the aisle at my wedding one day too”, Tiffany said softly to her. “He would have loved Mario you know. I’m sure wherever he is, he’s happy for you”. Tiffany was wiping her own tears as she tried to comfort Autumn. Where is Sid when you need him, Tiff thought. He’s always been good at cheering her up. “You think so? Do you think he would have had a problem with Mario’s age?”. “Do you have a problem with Mario’s age? Clearly not. Dad would trust your choice and support it like he’s always done”.

“You’re right. It’s not just dad though”, Autumn answered faintly. She can’t keep lying to Tiff. “I lied to you. I mean I do miss dad, but it’s not the only reason I’ve been upset in the past few days”. Tiffany was surprised but waited for Autumn to continue. “It’s Sidney”, she added.

“Sidney?”, Tiffany curiosity peaked. Autumn closed her eyes, not knowing how to tell Tiff what happened in this very spot. “He kind of kissed me”, she said barely above a whisper. “He what?!” Tiffany stood up in shock. “Calm down Tiff”. Autumn stood up too and closed the office’s door in case someone was around. She rested against the door, waiting for Tiff to digest the news. “Are you gonna tell me what happened or do I need to pull it out of you?”

“He told me that he has feelings for me and that I should not marry Mario”. Tiff could not believe her ears. She sat down trying to process it all. “And? You told him to go fuck himself? That you are marrying his friend and he should just fuck off? I cannot believe him. I mean you hear stories about his women escapades. But you? His mentor’s girlfriend? The man has no boundaries! This is crossing a line. Many lines!”, Tiff was livid. “It’s not like that”, Autumn sat next to Tiff, she spoke quietly as she traced a lace pattern in her dress. “He said he loves me”, her eyes welling up again.

“He loves you?! Oh please, that man loves nothing but that rubber disk!”, Tiff said angrily. “And you are crying why exactly? You should be angry. Did you slap his stupid face? Wait. Did he force himself on you?”, Tiff asked more alarmed, realizing that it may be the reason why Autumn was crying. “Jesus Tiff, calm down. He did not force himself on me like that. I…”, she paused to keep a sob from escaping. Tiff rubbed her back apologetically, seeing that Autumn was very upset. She tried to control her anger and let her friend tell her at her own pace.

Few moments passed when Autumn finally gathered herself. “I kissed him back”, she said not looking at Tiff. More silence. “I kissed Sidney back. Part of me wanted it. I struggled to stop him from kissing me. But I love Mario, I married Mario. I should not be thinking about this. Tiff say something”, Autumn begged looking at the stupefied expression of her friend. “Do you want me to tell that it’s okay? That you kissing Sid, Mario’s almost-son is okay? I’m sorry, but it’s not okay. It’s not okay that two hours after you married Mario, you’re sitting here crying about another man. Is this what it is? Are you regretting marrying Mario?”, Tiff asked cautiously, afraid of the answer.

“He’s probably wondering where I am now, isn’t he?”. “That’s beside the point! Answer my question Auttie! Do you want to be with Mario or not?”. It worried Tiffany that Autumn had to think before she answered. “I do. I’m just confused. I’ll get over it though. Sid is just a friend. Well, he was. I don’t think we can be friends anymore”. Tiff snorted sarcastically at that last statement. “Not if you want to be Mario’s wife, you can’t”, Tiff reprimanded.

“I will deal with that asshole don’t worry! He won’t get anywhere near you from now on. I will make sure of it”, Tiff said firmly. “No, no, no. You won’t say a word to him. I don’t want him to know that I told you. This topic does not leave this room, do you understand? Tiff, promise me you won’t do or say anything stupid to Sid or anyone else?”, Autumn’s tone was serious, almost business-like. Tiff nodded hesitantly. “As long as you promise that you will get your shit together. Mario will probably trade him to Philly if he learned about this”. Tiffany was trying to lighten up the mood seeing that Autumn was miserable on a supposedly happy day.

They were both startled when there was a knock at the door. Trina peered her head in. “Everything okay in here Autumn? Mario is outside and he’s worried”. Clearing her throat, Autumn stood up and straightened her dress. Before she got the chance to answer, Tiffany spoke, giving her some time to collect herself. “She’s just being emotional. Tell Mario she needs a couple of minutes and she’ll be right out”. Trina nodded and left to give Autumn the space she clearly needed. “Okay, now take few deep breaths and go talk to your husband. Can you do that without mentioning his asshole of a best man?”. Autumn nodded quietly and asked Tiff to bring Mario to the office.

Once Mario appeared in front of her, she felt a fresh wave of tears threatening to choke her. He gathered her in his arms and kissed her temple. He waited as she let it all out without a single question. After few moments of silence, Mario pushes her gently away from him to look at her. He held her at arm’s length, waiting for her to tell him what’s wrong. He had an inkling of what it could be. “I miss him and I wish he could have been here today, that’s all honey. I’m okay I promise”. She kissed him briefly and hugged him again. You’re starting this marriage off with a lie, she thought to herself as she squeezed her eyes shut. She made a silent promise that it will be the first and last time she would lie to Mario. He deserved much better than this.

“I know my love. I meant it when I said that all the pain and loss you lived in the past will stay in the past. Life was unfair to you but this will change. I will live the rest of my years trying to make it up to you. I don’t want you to hide from me when you’re upset though. I’m always there for you sweetheart. You can always tell me what’s troubling you. Okay?”

Every word that came out of his mouth reminded her of all the reason she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. She did not doubt her relationship with Mario. She was just confused and surprised by Sidney’s revelation. Or this is what she wanted to believe.

When the couple decided to rejoin the party, their wedding party, they were met with few concerned faces in Sidney’s living room. Sidney stood unsure next to his mother and sister. He was clearly worried. Mario smiled reassuringly as he squeezed his wife’s hand. “Relax guys, she wasn’t running away or anything of the sorts”, he said with a chuckle. Tiffany laughed nervously, getting a suspicious glance from Sidney. As everyone headed towards the reception, Sidney pulled Tiffany back to the side, away from the group.

“What happened in there?”, he inquired. Tiffany snorted as she pushed his hand away. “Aren’t you a piece of work Crosby?”, her voice dripping with annoyance. She couldn’t contain her irritation with him. Sidney was taken aback by her tone. “She made me promise but fuck this. You stay away from her. She is happy with Mario, don’t ruin it. Go on with your pitiful love life and leave my sister the fuck alone or I swear to god I will make sure you never skate again!”, Tiffany spoke between clenched teeth. Sidney was not too surprised that she told Tiffany. He knew how close they were. He was surprised that it seems this topic was the reason Autumn disappeared from the reception. He wanted to ask for more information but was scared that he was already on Tiffany’s bad side. She could be a real bitch if you wronged her.

“I’m not planning on ruining anything. I will keep my distance. I want her to be happy even if it was with another man”, he forced his brain to take command of his words. Tiffany’s face softened after hearing the sadness in his strained voice. “Sid, there’s literally thousands of women who would do absolutely anything to be with you. You want her because you can’t have her. It is this much clear and simple to me. Just think of how wrong this is. If you care about her, just keep your distance and don’t confuse her”. “Why was she hiding?”, he took his chance and asked.

Tiffany sighed exasperated. “We didn’t get the chance to talk much. I guess she was upset with herself for what happened.” “She should not be. It was my fault, I started it”, Sidney said a little stunned that Autumn is blaming herself. “She said she kissed you back and didn’t stop you or something. You know what, that doesn’t matter. Bottom line is, she married Mario. You need to stay away. Don’t tell her I said anything. You won’t be talking to her anyways, so I shouldn’t worry about it. Right?”, she asked, quirking an eyebrow. “She kissed me back? She did”, he whispered mainly to himself but Tiffany heard him. She snapped her fingers in front of his face. “Right?”, she repeated her question.

Sidney just ignored her and went inside the tent. Getting himself a drink was the first order of business. He took a seat at one of the tables next to an unhappy Tiffany. “Have you ever told her about us, Tiff?”.

Notes

Do you guys like where this story is headed?
As always, thanks for reading!!

Charlie :)