AUTUMN LEAVES

Red tainted Van Gogh’s dream of peaceful autumn.

The warm colours of fall met the warmth of blood.

Bright spatters stained the apricot of Autumn’s shirt.

A gun dropped with a thud on a tarnished burgundy carpet.

The room fell silent. The whole world fell silent.

But the antique clock kept on ticking at a sickening rhythm.

Time went on. The world did not end.

But Autumn’s world may have.

“What have you done. what have you done?!”

Autumn slid down the wall with her arms around Sidney, his weight pulling her down to the floor with him.

“Hey! Stay with me! I’ve got you!”

“I can’t…breathe,” Sidney said coughing out blood. He fell flat on his back with his hand to his chest.

“Okay…Okay...just stay awake okay. I’ve got you,” Autumn said hurriedly. “Call an ambulance!” she yelled at an empty room. Her hands shook uncontrollably as she tried to unzip his sweater. “Someone call 911!” she desperately cried, despite knowing that no one will hear her.

Ripping his sweater open, she wiped her eyes quickly as her vision was getting more and more blurred by tears. The shot was not close to his heart, but he was bleeding badly.

“Can’t…breathe-” Sidney said with a strained voice. He started gasping to get some air, “not… gonna… make it,” he added out of breath.

“No! I will stop the bleeding. I will call 911!” Autumn yelled. “Sid stay with me! Please stay with me, baby,” she said as she pressed her hand over his wound, slowing down the bleeding slightly. She needed to get the bullet out. No, she needed to get him to breathe first.

Autumn felt Sidney’s hand over hers as she was trying to decide on the best course of action. Sidney held her hand to his chest. “Told you-” Sidney said, a ghost of a smile appearing on his face, “I love …you… more,” he whispered with his last breath. Sidney stopped wheezing. He stopped fighting for breath. Sidney stopped fighting for his life. As he closed his eyes, Autumn started shaking him to wake up. “No, no, no!”

It was a matter of time before someone passed out from the lack of Oxygen, of course, any doctor would know that. But at that moment, she was no longer a doctor. She was just a woman holding the man she loved in her arms, irrationally shaking him in the hope of bringing him back to life. The man she loved was dying in her arms.

The man she loved was dying so she could live.

“You still have a pulse,” Autumn said with one hand on his wound and the other on his neck. Sensing his shallow breathing, she realized that it wouldn’t be long before his airways got obstructed. “I will take care of you. I’m not letting you die,” she said, putting her cheek against his while her hand remained steady on his chest. Sidney was a strong man and she can save him. She will save him. Autumn refused to watch him die helplessly.

With determination, she stretched her leg to reach for her discarded phone while her hand pressed against his wound to manage the bleeding. With all the strength she could gather, she called 911. She made sure to give the operator her location first.

“Sidney Crosby has been shot. One bullet to the chest. Right lung is compromised. No, the shooter is gone. His vitals are low, do you hear me? It’s Sidney Crosby, and his vitals are low! Please hurry!” she yelled into the phone. While it may not change much, she still used Sidney’s name, desperate for help to come fast.

“They’re coming baby. Please hold on. Do it for me, okay?” she said kissing his forehead before fetching some items from a nearby table. “Now, I’m gonna try to help you breathe, okay? I’m just gonna use this to drain some of the fluids blocking your airways, okay?” she explained the way she would to her resident, in an attempt to calm her nerves. She needed to concentrate as she was about to use Mario’s expensive whiskey and his sharp letter opener on Sidney’s chest.

Autumn kept herself together, narrating every step she took to try to focus on the task at hand rather than on who the patient was. As she managed to give Sidney a few more minutes of life, the ambulance arrived.

The paramedics entered the house and took over the scene. A woman rubbed Autumn’s back and gently removed her hand off Sidney’s chest so they could get to work. “No, I have to keep the pressure! You don’t understand! He’s bleeding, it must be an artery!” Autumn yelled.

“Ma’am, don’t worry. We will take care of him,” the paramedic said calmly as she helped Autumn stand up in the middle of the chaos that her living room had turned into. Four people with medical equipment huddled around Sidney; two successfully intubated him while the other two prepped the stretcher.

The woman asked her something, but Autumn did not respond as she silently watched the medical assistants trying to save a lifeless Sidney. Her Sidney. She tilted her head weakly and contemplated the man who just took a bullet for her. Her Sidney looked at peace, like he was just napping on the couch while she made lunch. But his skin was never this pale she thought as sob after sob escaped her.

Sirens, with their deafening sound, blared outside as Autumn covered her ears and started thrashing her head “stop the noise! They’re gonna wake him up! Tell them to stop!” she screamed. “Tell them to stop!” she cried once again as two paramedics tried to control her. “Sidney’s gonna wake up! Please, tell them to stop!” she said, but this time, her voice was fading away. “Tell them to stop,” Autumn murmured one last time before she collapsed into a pool of blood.

*****

Baby last night was hands down
One of the best nights
That I've had no doubt
Between the bottle of wine
And the look in your eyes and the Marvin Gaye
Then we danced in the dark under September stars in the pourin' rain

“I miss dancing with you,” Sidney whispered in Autumn’s ear. “Me too,” Autumn whispered back placing her hand over his solid chest, the only barrier between them was his t-shirt, the one she was wearing. The soft candle glow was casting enough light for Autumn to see the lopsided grin that tugged at her heartstrings. Sidney wrapped his arms tightly around her as they danced barefoot in the middle of the secluded cabin.

“I love you, so fucking much. It scares me sometimes,” Sidney whispered with a hoarse voice.

And I know that I can't ever tell you enough
That all I need in this life is your crazy love
If I never get to see the Northern lights
Or if I never get to see the Eiffel Tower at night
Oh if all I got is your hand in my hand
Baby, I could die a happy man

Baby, I could die a happy man

“I love you more,” Autumn said with teary eyes.

“Not possible.”

Not possible.

Not Possible.

“Hey, honey, it’s me,” Linda said softly as she continued to wipe Autumn’s face with the damp cloth. “You’re okay. Look, Tiff is here too,” Linda added, her eyes wet and concerned. “Sidney,” Autumn said for the millionth time in the last hour. “He’s still in surgery. He’s doing well,” Tiffany lied. For all she knew, Sidney could have gone into the hypovolemic shock that the surgeons were expecting, but were wary to voice when she asked.

“They gave you another dose of diazepam to help you calm down,” Tiffany said as she stroked Autumn’s hair, finding it hard to remain calm herself. Getting a call saying that her sister has been in a shooting accident and was brought to the ER, two floors down from where she was treating a patient, was nerve-wracking; she was still trying to digest what happened to Sidney, too.

As Autumn sat up in bed, the small curtained space started spinning. “Hey, give it a minute honey,” Linda urged Autumn to remain in bed. “I need to see him,” Autumn said, with a raw and barely audible voice. “When Sidney is out of surgery, we will go see him, okay? Meanwhile, try to rest a little. Here, let me help you change,” Tiff suggested as she held hospital scrubs in her hand.

When Autumn looked down at her clothes, another panic started bubbling. After a few attempts, Tiffany, Linda and the drugs managed to calm Autumn down and convince her to change into Tiffany’s ducky scrubs.

A police officer peered her head in, “Ma’am if she is awake, we need to talk to her, please. This is my job. You have to understand, if a shooter is on the loose, we need to make sure he doesn’t hurt anyone else,” she asked Tiffany again, attempting to speak with a traumatized Autumn. But one look at her victim made Lieutenant Perry take a step back, and with her mouth set in a line, she shook her head at the detectives who waited impatiently outside the curtains.

Sitting in bed, Autumn hunched her back covered her ears with her hands as she swayed slightly back and worth. “Auttie,” Tiffany spoke gently as she sat next to her sister. “Do you recall what happened? Hmm?” she asked Autumn calmly as she rubbed her back. Tiffany looked wearily at Linda who shook her head. “I know what you’ve been through was…. well, horrifying. But it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it. It’s completely normal, sweetie,” Tiffany paused to wipe her tears. “But I need to know that you’re alright. Say something, anything,” Tiffany said.

Autumn took her hands off her head and looked around her, at the white curtain and the white lights. She seemed more responsive now as she squeezed her eyes shut. Then, she clutched her own throat and started breathing rapidly. “Hey, hey, you’re hyperventilating, calm down,” Linda said.

“Can’t breathe…” she cried. “Sidney. He couldn’t breathe,” she added, her lips quivering as the events in her living room came flooding back in one rush of wretched realization. “The bullet… he took the bullet for me.”

Tiffany hugged her sister as both women cried. Linda joined in, engulfing the two sisters in a motherly hug, the same way she did on the day their father lost his fight, in this very hospital. She had promised him to take care of his girls, and she will do that until her last breath.

“Alright, I will be right back, okay girls?” Linda said wiping her eyes as Tiffany gave her a questioning look.

“I’m gonna call her husband. I don’t know if someone had told him yet. She needs him, and God knows, Sidney does too,” Linda said to Tiffany in a hushed voice.

Notes

Hello peeps,

Sad Chapter, I know :(

Thanks for reading and for your feedback!

Enjoy the weekend

Charlie