My Rock

“We literally have nothing done in this room,” I folded my arms over my chest, looking into an empty baby room.

“So why don’t we get started on it?” Sidney asked, coming up behind me.

“Well can you please start by setting up the crib? I already have the dresser and shelves built and in the guestroom down the hall because I didn’t know if we were going to pain in here or not before we get furniture in here.”

“I’ll do it, I promise. Don’t stress over it.”

“Sid, you’ve said you were gonna do it over a month ago and it’s still sitting here. We need to get this done now in case I have the baby early.”

“You won’t have the baby early,” he said, kicking a box across the room. I sense some tension between us and I know that we are gonna have a fight about this.

“How do you know that Sidney?” I questioned.

“Because you won’t. I don’t think it’ll come early so it won’t.”

“That’s not how having a baby works. It comes when it’s ready to whether their parents are ready or not. Just like when the baby is here, they don’t care if it’s the middle of the night, if they need something they cry until they get it.”

“Apparently just like you,” I heard him mumble.

“Excuse me?” I asked.

“What!? I didn’t say anything Ashley!” he yelled, opening his arms defensively. He then continued to bend over and move some boxes around. At this point I don’t care how hot he looks in his hoodie, sweats and backwards baseball hat. He was pissing me the hell off. I understand they lost last night but damn he doesn’t need to be such a cry baby.

“Whatever. All I wanted was for you to set up the crib but I guess that’s not happening.”

“I’ll do it, I promise. I gotta go for a workout with the team, I don’t know when I’ll be home. Don’t wait up.”

“Okay.” I huffed, walking into my room. I close the door shut until I heard him leave, then I opened up the door again and walked out.

He’s been struggling again on the ice and I know he has for a fact but still, he doesn’t need to take it out on me. Normally I love it when Sidney takes out his frustration on me, especially when he really needs me because it shows me he still trusts me enough with these things. What I don’t like is that he’s been too busy for me and the baby. I could deliver early and he doesn’t seem to care at all and won’t find the time to do the simplest thing. My parents and his are set to fly in and help me set up the nursery one weekend when Sidney is on a road trip. All I want is for him to set up the crib. I think it’s the father’s role to do it and get involved in it. Sidney is a very involved parent so far but as things get worst for him and more stressful he isn’t finding the time for us anymore. I understand it but I don’t.

I was snapped out of my thoughts when he came home and I heard the garage door close. I just flipped through the channels and didn’t make a sound. Clearly he didn’t realize just how mad I was at him and he was still mad at me.

“Just reminding you we have the Penguins Christmas party for the association tonight and we’re leaving at 6,” was all he said when he walked by and to his bedroom to take a shower. I just rolled my eyes and waited a little longer to start getting ready.

He got ready in his room, I got ready in mine. We’ve never gotten ready in different rooms for the whole time of getting ready since I’ve lived with him. Normally I would at least step in his room once to help him or have him help me, this time I just stayed in my room and put on some nice music to help myself relax. I curled my hair, singing along to my music but not in the way I would normally. I wasn’t in the mood to go to this one, especially because I know the attention is going to be all on us. The last thing I want to do is see people right now.

I walked out in my dress, thankfully being able to get it fully zipped up and met up with Sidney in the hallway. We awkwardly looked at each other and looked away immediately. He went back into his room to get his phone, while I went in to grab my lip gloss to add to my purse. He looked good, damn good. His shirt was unbuttoned revealing his chest and his suit fit him in all the right places. His short hair was gelled to perfection too, just like how it was for the Vancouver Olympics when they won the gold medal. I’m not even gonna get started on the scent either.

**Sidney’s POV**
Fuck me, I thought walking out into the hallway and bumping into Ashley. She looked so good the way that lace and short black dress hugged her curves. She was gorgeous and dangerously sexy. If everyone didn’t know she was here with me tonight then I’d have to watch out for her so she wouldn’t leave with someone else. Her hair was in the curls I love too, and her makeup was done perfectly. She was wearing her sexy vanilla perfume. The scent was deadly, and if I got too close to her I know I wouldn’t be able to stay away. But since we aren’t talking I can’t even compliment her.

**Ashley’s POV**
I grabbed my lip gloss and down the stairs I attempted to go. Now that I’m getting more pregnant it’s getting harder to walk in high heels. And my outfit is not helping my situation either. Sidney came over and tried to help me down the stairs. I just shrugged him off and said, “I got it.”

In the car I gave him the cold shoulder too. My eyes never broke contact with the window and whatever was on the other side of it. He didn’t seem like he wanted to talk to me either because he was glued to his phone messaging someone. In the reflection of the window I could see it was a girl he was messaging. I couldn’t help but feel a burning n my heart and my stomach drop to the floor. I’m not one to get jealous but this really affected me. Maybe if he’s messaging other girls he’s not into me after all. I’m not one to bite my tongue either so I questioned him about it.

“Who are you texting?”

“Nobody.”

“Horse shit. You haven’t looked away from your phone this whole ride.” Maybe I did want to talk to him after all with a comment like that. Great going Ash.

“Why do you wanna know who I’m talking to so bad?”

“Because I want to know.”

“Just leave it,” he said, responding to the girls message. Before he could even realize it, I took his message and scrolled through the conversation quickly. My heart sank and practically fell through the bottom of this vehicle. Thankfully we have a driver because if I was driving, we would have been in a ditch at the side of the road right now. “Ashley-” he went to say sympathetically.

“Don’t talk to me,” my voice cracked. The tears came streaming down my cheeks and I couldn’t control it. My hand covered my mouth to try and stop myself from sobbing out loud. I could tell it hurt him seeing me this way. He looked stunned and genuinely disappointed in himself. Or at least I hope it’s disappointment.

“Ashley I can explain-”

“Why the fuck are you messaging another girl? Am I not good enough for you? Is the baby not as important to you?” I sobbed.

“Ash, I was just responding to her message saying thank you for the other day, that’s all. We met up and had coffee-”

“So while I was waiting for you to come home and for you to help me with some baby things you were with another girl getting coffee? You are fucking sick. Who does that to their fucking pregnant girl?”

“That’s not what it looks like!”

“That seems pretty clear to me,” I wiped my tears. God bless waterproof makeup!

“It’s not. She’s part of my medical team and was giving me back some results and I was asking her a few questions about what I’ve been going through lately. You know dr. Tool. Her name is Marissa, you don’t have to worry.”

“Oh. And what did she say?”

“That if it continues I’m back on rest. That’s part of why I’ve been stressing out.”

“That makes sense but you’ve been so much different and I’m really getting treated like shit.”

**Sidney’s POV**
Treated like shit. That’s what I was afraid would happen and why I don’t get into relationships.

“What do you mean?”

“Can you not see I’m struggling? I’m pregnant, managing your life and my own, trying to organize the house and prepare for a baby and go to all of these classes and read all these books. I’m trying to keep my life private while dodging photographers everywhere I go. I have to go to these events where everyone looks so damn fit and hot, and I’m a fat whale. I feel so fucking ugly it’s ridiculous and I hate that I have these stupid bitches who only tell it to me and to other people right in front of my face! And I hate that I feel like I’m doing it alone.”

Fuck. “I know you have no choice when it comes to your career and I know your battling your shit and trying to get back into the swing of things, and prepare for becoming a father and it’s overwhelming, but I’m feeling it too. I just feel like I’m being pushed aside and that I’m not being listened to.”

I pulled her into my chest and let her cry as hard as she needed to. I rubbed her arms and her back as best as I could despite the awkward positioning.

“I am so sorry for treating you that way and for making you feel this way Ashley. You know I would never do that to you and it kills me to hear you say this. You’ve been handling it so well and right now I guess I’ve been freaking out about everything and I’m overwhelmed like you are. We are both at weird stages of our lives and we’re trying to figure out the most life changing one together and we still can’t come to conclusions on it either.”

“You think?” she chuckled.

“Finally a smile!” I smiled at her, kissing her forehead as she giggled. “I promise that I will work on becoming better with you and the baby and balancing work and my personal life. You know I’ve never even had anyone I’ve been with tied down to before so even feeling like I am with you is new to me and I’m not sure what to do or how to handle it. It’s all a learning experience with this you know?”

**Ashley’s POV**
“Yeah, I know what you mean.” I really wanted to bring up the topic of us right now because of the situation with us but I figured now isn’t the best time. We were about to go to the dinner and I didn’t want to make him more upset. I want him to enjoy this night.

“Do you feel better about this now that we’ve talked about it?” Leave it to Sidney to talk about everything and hoping it makes it better. Even though that’s one of the things I love about him. He always likes to talk about things and be open with those he’s close with so that things feel better between everyone.

“Not really, but I’m better.”

“You really look beautiful you know that right?”

“I don’t feel it,” I said, crossing my legs.

“Do those girls serious tell you you’re not?”

“Sidney, girls are mean! Plus what is put online isn't always nice either. I’m having a lot of body issues.”

“But you're pregnant. It’s normal. In fact, I think you’re just as better looking pregnant. Then again you’re very pretty and good looking and attractive,” he blushed, causing me to blush too.

“Really?”

“Yes, would I lie about that!?”

“Oh my God! No! I’ve never lied to you!” he laughed.

“Better not have!” I shook my fist.

**At the Christmas Event**
We posed for pictures together and just with Sidney, then we walked into dinner. It was fun taking pictures because it’s so unique that it becomes fun. It was still awkward though because I don’t feel satisfied yet and I still feel upset about earlier. But that’s normal with any relationship. He was very touchy all night and always had to have an arm around my waist or holding my hand.

We socialized appropriately and made best of the situation. He knew which wives pissed me off and bothered me, and he made sure to be extra protective of me when we were in front of them. I just seemed extra bitchy in a way but I didn’t care. He also made sure that we stayed away from them as much as possible. The bitchy wives were more busy taking pictures rather than socializing with their men but whatever. Of course I stayed true to myself and helped everyone by passing everything around the table and talking to everyone gently.

All in all it was a great night and I really enjoyed myself. It was nice to actually go out and do something instead of sulk at home. When we got home Sidney needed to do some work things and needed to sort out his medical bills so I went upstairs to go take a nice and relaxing bath. I lit some candles, put my bubbles in and turned on my music. I just sat in the tub and thought about everything. It was the first time in a long time where I could just relax and breathe.

I was interrupted about half an hour later when there was a knock at the door followed by a soft, “Ashley?”

“Come in,” I replied, pulling more bubbled over my boobs to hide them. I know Sidney’s seen me naked, heck, we went through a phase where we had sex non stop (which I loved!), but since I’m mad he doesn't get to see. Sucks to suck doesn’t it?

“When you’re done can you please meet me in the baby’s room?”

“Sure.” I tired to get out of the tub but was unsuccessful. It’s harder to get up with a huge basketball in my stomach. “Sid, do you mind helping me up?”

“Yeah, no problem,” he said, instantly helping to pull me up. He got me a towel and tried me off and got me my bath robe. I find like I get super weak after being in a bath and lately I’ve been exhausted at night. He’s been amazing during these moments.

Once I was ready he walked me to the nursery, covering my eyes the entire time. When we got to the door and he was ready for me to see, he pulled his hands back and said, “surprise!” When his hands were away from my face I saw that he had set up the crib.

“Oh my God Sid!” I covered my mouth, tears falling from my eyes.

“What!? Is everything okay?” he asked, scared that I was upset due to the tears.

“Oh my God! Yes! It’s perfect! Thank you for doing it!” I cried giving him a huge hug.

“You’re welcome.” I ran out of his arms and checked the crib out. He did do a great job if I say so myself.

“Was that so hard?” I asked, elbowing him to show I was teasing him.

“Yes! I accidentally hit my thumb with the hammer three times!” he laughed.

“Thank God you play hockey and don’t do construction,” I laughed. If only he knows just how much I appreciate him doing this and how much more I love him for doing it.

Notes

Outfit for the chapter: http://www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=108598980
So, so, so sorry for the late update! It has been a crazy week aside from it being Christmas! With that being said, Merry belated Christmas! Hope everyone had a blast! For those of you who were affected by the ice storm and the severe power outage in Toronto and the GTA hope you all are safe and have power again! I was out for a little while and ended up having a ton of people living in my house once we got it back! Hope you all are okay!

Back to the story, hope you all enjoyed this chapter. The next chapter will be worth it I swear! Thank you all for reading and for the feedback! Keep it coming! :)