I sighed as I tapped my fingers on my legs sitting on the couch. I was beginning to grow impatient waiting for the door to knock. I had no idea what I was going to say to Kris. I didn’t know how I felt about Sidney yet. I just knew I didn’t like Kris as much as I wanted to. He was a nice guy and I wanted to like him, but I couldn’t.

I felt something for Sidney and even though I knew he’d never feel anything for me, I couldn’t lead Kris on. My thoughts were interrupted by a few knocks on the door. I got up and went to answer it.

I braced myself before opening the door and giving Kris a small smile. “Hey.”

“Hey.” He walked inside as I stepped aside to let him in.

He looked around the apartment for a moment taking everything in as if he’d never been here before. He looked back at me as I gestured my hand to the couch. He started walking as I followed.

He sat down on the other edge of the couch and sighed. “So I think we need to talk.”

I nodded looking down at the floor. “Yeah.” I took a pause thinking of the words to say before opening my mouth again. “I just want to do this without sounding too cliché. Kris, you’re a sweet guy. You’re a great guy. I just don’t want you to think I’m-,”

“Settling?” he finished.

“Yeah," I answered surprised at how he'd found the word I couldn't. Another reason he was so great.

Another reason I was a horrible person.

"I’m just confused about some things, if that makes sense,” I said, guilt working its way into each word I spoke.

He tilted his head. “About what?”

“I don’t really know,” I admitted.

He frowned. “Oh.”

I nodded. “Yeah.” We sat in silence for a few minutes. “Would you like some water?”

He shrugged. “Sure.”

I got up and walked over to the fridge thinking of what to say next. I could feel his eyes burning a hole through my back. It made this even harder. I heard his footsteps follow me. I turned back around and handed him a bottle of water. He muttered a thank you. I took a drink and waited for him to say something.

He took a drink and looked at me. “I like you, a lot.”

I looked at him in shock, not expecting him to be so blunt. I didn’t know what to say back. I opened my mouth a few times. I sighed before finally saying, “You’re sweet. And I do like you,” a tiny smile appeared on his face. “And I really want to like you the way you want me to,” I looked up at him. “But I don’t.” His smile was gone.

He frowned and grew very serious. I started to feel suffocated from the growing tension in the room. “Why don’t you like me?”

“It’s not that I don’t. I do. Just not as much as you’d like me to,” I explained.

“Is there someone else?” he asked.

I shrugged slightly. “I don’t know, maybe. But that’s not important.” I smiled softly walking closer to him as he leaned against the counter crossing his arms and his legs stretched out.

“So say it.” He gave me a stern look.

I furrowed my eyebrows. “What?”

“That you don’t like me.”

I shook me head. “You are an amazing guy Kris and I do like you. A whole lot. That’s why I don’t want to start anything. I can't like you more until I sort out my feelings. I don’t know if I will. And I wouldn’t be able to make you happy like you deserve.”

His eyes fell to the carpet. I began to feel that gnawing feeling in my stomach again. I felt the guilt rising up to me. I stepped closer to him and grabbed his hands from under his crossed arms. I squeezed them slightly and gave him a small smile. “I do wish I could like you more. I do wish I could give you what you want. Believe me.”

He let out a small laugh. “Me too.” He looked at me for a moment without saying anything. He just stared into my eyes and smiled. “Well, at least I tried right?” he said adjusting his beanie. “You know the first time we met, I thought you were the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen,” he admitted looking down at his feet.

I felt my face start to warm up. “Me? Really?” I walked over the living room again as he followed. “Why would you ever like someone like me?”

He laughed as he sat on the couch. “You were just really cool and witty and breath taking in everything you said. I was always amazed by you.”

I stared at him for a moment before smirking. “Well you’re not so bad yourself. You are charming and incredibly adorable. You’ll find someone who is dying to be with you.”

“Really?” he smiled hopefully.

“I don't doubt it for a second.” I replied as I reached in for a hug. He embraced me with such warmth as I wrapped my arms around him. He let go and we smiled at each other. I kissed him softly on the cheek smiling once more.

He nodded. “You will too.”

I sighed. “I hope so.”
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Brooke! You’re here!” Max ran to pin me against the wall the second I walked into the locker room and hug me as tightly as he could.

I tried gasping for air. “Let me go,” I mumbled into his shirt.

He let me go as he grabbed me by the arm and pulled me to sit down on the bench. “You know, Sidney’s around here somewhere,” he said nudging me with his elbow and grinning.

I shook my head. “Yes Max I’m pretty sure he’d be here at practice. I don’t know why I come in here. I should just wait outside in the hallway.”

“No. You come in here because you love me.” he smirked at me.

I shot him a look.

“And because Peyton makes you,” he added shrugging.

Marc came in the locker room and smiled as he walked towards the two of us. I let out a yawn as I stretched my arms above my head. “Tired?”

"Brooke?"

I snapped out of my trance to see Marc towering over me and waiting for a response.

"Sorry, what did you ask?"

"I asked if you were tired," he repeated.

I nodded softly. “Sort of.”

Max and Marc both smirked. “Hmm, wonder what you were thinking of.” He gave Max a knowing look.

I rolled my eyes looking around the room. The truth is, I was thinking about both Kris and Sidney. I felt horrible for what I had done to Kris and couldn’t get rid of the guilt. I wondered if he hated me.

At the same time, I was trying to figure out what exactly it was I felt for Sidney. Yes, he was sweet and different but I’m not sure if I like him more beyond the friend point. And I was sure that he felt nothing for me.

“Brooke? Are you okay?” Max shook me lightly.

I shook my head, relieving my thoughts and nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry I was thinking.”

They nodded as Marc looked to the side and a mischievous smile grew on his face. “Hey, look who’s coming.”

Max and I turned our heads to see Sidney walking over to us. He smiled politely and stood in front of us. “Hey Brooke.”

I smiled back. “Hey Sidney.”

He looked at Marc and Max. “Are we still going to lunch?”

Marc nodded. “Yeah, we’re just waiting on Jordan now.”

“And Kris,” Max said looking around the room to try and spot them.

My eyes went wide. “What?” They all looked at me strangely. “What did you say?”

“I said we’re just waiting on Kris too.” He gave me a confused look and returned back to looking.

I felt my stomach turn over. My heart began to race. The guilt came rushing back in seconds. I felt my face grow paler by the second. “Oh.”

“I don’t think Brooke feels too good.” I heard Marc say.

I took in a deep breath and forced a smile on my face. “I’m fine. Just got a little headache. I’m fine, really.”

He nodded cautiously as Max stood up. “Let’s go find them before I die of starvation. Maybe Tyler wants to come too.”

Marc smirked at me. “Brooke, do you want to come with us?”

“Oh, no I don’t want to intrude. I’m fine, really.” I replied in protest.

“You always say that. You wouldn’t be intruding. Never. We want you to come, right Sidney?”

He smiled slightly. “We wouldn’t mind at all. You’re better company than Max who never stops talking,” he shrugged.

Max gasped and put his hand over his heart as if he were offended. “That is such a lie. Now, I’m not going to talk you anymore!” he crossed his arms and looked the opposite direction.

Sidney merely shook his head. I sighed. “Well, if you’re sure.”

“Great,” Marc smiled. “You can ride with me and Sidney.” He finished glancing quickly at both of us. “The other guys can ride with Max.”

I frowned. “Wait. What about Peyton?”

“I’ll drive her!” Max yelled scaring all of us slightly. He cleared his throat and sniffed trying to act more casual. “I mean. I’ll go get her.” He shrugged and took a few steps before running out of the room to find her.

We stood there staring at him before shaking our heads and walking to the parking lot to Marc’s car. He stepped out into the parking lot and laughed.

“What?” I asked.

He shook his head. “Nothing.” He paused before saying, “Brooke you can take the front seat.”

I frowned. “What if Sidney wants the front seat?”

“Sidney’s nice so he’ll give it to you anyway,” he explained.

I looked at Sidney who let out a small laugh. “It’s okay, you can have it.”

I climbed into the passenger’s seat as he went to the back. Marc came in and grinned. “See? Told you. He’s a gentleman, right? Just one of his many great qualities. He treats any pretty girl like a gentleman.”

I looked at Sidney through the mirror and saw him texting on his phone. “Oh, I’m sure Marc,” I said sarcastically.

He began to drive onto the street as he spoke again. “Hey Sidney, did you know Brooke is single?”

He laughed. “Really Marc? I had no idea.”

He nodded. “Oh yes, she is. I just thought you should know. And she hasn’t been on any dates lately.”

“How do you know? I keep my personal life, personal.” I snapped.

“Brooke,” Marc began. “No girl goes on dates without mentioning them. And you have that not going out on dates lately look on your face.”

I felt my face heat up as I sunk into the seat.

“Hey Sid, have you been on any dates lately?”

I glanced at the side mirror to see him sort of making a face. “Why do you want to know?”

He shrugged. “Just want to know if you’ve met anyone worth mentioning.”

“Well I don’t really meet people with all this traveling,” he reminded.

“True. It’s hard to find a girl that can deal with all of that and have a life,” he looked at me. “Hey Brooke how needy do you get? Are you independent?”

I glared at him. “Marc. If you don’t drive this car I will take the wheel and run you over myself.” I said sternly.

He laughed. “Okay, okay I’ll stop.” After a moment of silence he opened his mouth again. “Your kids would be so cute.”

“Marc!” I yelled.

I could only shake my head as Sidney and him laughed.

Notes

Okay, the readers number needs to go up. That 800 has been mocking at me for over a week. It's taunting me. I can't take it anymore.

Guys, fix it.