The Diary of an Unintentional Puck Slut

November 15, 2014

Dear Diary,

akjalskdjdslfkjdsklj!!!!! So maddd!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course Sidney Crosby and the Penguins would be in San Jose for my birthday.

I definitely should have seen this coming, seeing as it’s been on the schedule since this summer, but I don’t look at the schedule! Why would I? I just ask Brandon if I need to know something.

I shouldn’t be mad at Brandy for not telling me (yes that’s what I call him when I’m upset) because it’s not his fault, although it would have been smart for him to at least give me a head’s up.

Normally, as head ice girl, I just need to know when home games are, not who we’re playing, and that’s not a problem. Most of the time I don’t care, but yesterday, on my 24th birthday I walked into the SAP Center all happy and chipper only to have my day ruined by the fucking Penguins logo!!!

I don’t know why teams feel like they need to decorate not only the visiting team locker room, but also random things around the building with their logo. It’s like they’re trying to assert their dominance or something.

So, I was just walking along, minding my own business, when BAM! Pens logo. Like what? Why does this need to be on the door to the ice girls’ locker room? Teams don’t normally do that, because it’s none of their fucking business.

So I tore it off (it was just paper) and stormed into the visiting team’s locker room.

“What the hell is this doing on the door to the ice girls’ locker room!?!!” I screamed and Disco Dan slowly turned to look at me. He had been in the middle of some ‘motivational speech’ and obviously didn’t like being interrupted. I could feel the tension as the entire Pittsburgh Penguins collectively rolled their eyes and mentally called me a bitch.

“Actually she has a good point,” Dan said after a few minutes of painful silence. “Does anyone know how this got there?” He looked toward the equipment management and other staff, but none of them knew anything about it.

“I swear to God Sid! If you had anything to do with this, just keep in mind that I know ALL of your pregame routines- yes all of them, even the ones you don’t tell your teammates about- and I will ruin as many of them as I can before the game tonight!” I screamed and held up my hand to indicate I was not finished. “And you!” I pointed at Geno. “If you were behind this, or your little boyfriend,” I gestured toward Nealer, “had anything to do with this I will unleash Caeleigh’s wrath upon you!”

I stared them down for a few seconds before running out of there.

I quickly got out my phone and texted Caeleigh, telling her not to come to practice. The last thing I needed was for her to see Geno and freak out. As far as I can tell she’s over him, but I don’t want to risk anything.

As if things couldn’t get worse, I’m sitting on the bench during practice watching the other girls skate (because I’m lazy) and Sidney Crosby (@#!@) sits next to me.

“Hey, I wanted to apologize for upsetting you,” he said, trying to be friendly.

“Oh, so you put it up?” I asked, turning to him so I could glare at him.

“No, but someone on the team obviously did, so I’m apologizing for them,” he said, a bit less calmly.

“Okay,” I said and turned back to watch the ice, trying to appear disinterested in whatever he had to say.

“I’m happy to see that you and Brandon are doing well. I kind of wished you would cheat on him and he would dump you, but I guess you’re over that now,” he sounded a little sad, but I didn’t care.

“Yup,” I replied, still watching the ice girls (try to) skate.

“I don’t know if you’ve heard this yet, but I have a new girlfriend.” I froze when he said this, I’m not sure why, but it kind of hit me unexpectedly. I continued to not look at him, hoping he couldn’t notice how much this had affected me.

“Cool. What’s she like?”

“She’s kind of the opposite of you; she doesn’t have a crazy cat, she’s not cheating on me, and-”

“Sid shut up! I don’t care about your stupid girlfriend,” I said suddenly, causing him to lean back (I think he was afraid I would hit him). Before he got a chance to say anything I got up and climbed over the boards and skated away. I tried to carry on with practice, ignoring everything he’d just said, but I couldn’t. I don’t know why, but I couldn’t get it out of my head.

That afaternoon I sat alone in the nursery with Teddy thinking about everything; why was I so upset about Sid having a girlfriend? I was in the middle of contemplating this when Brandon came in after waking up from his pregame nap. He picked up Ellie and sat next to me.

“I heard you got into a bit of a fight today?” he said quietly as he gave a bottle to Ellie, and looked over at me with a smile.

“Yeah, not really a fight, I just screamed at the Penguins for a while, I probably shouldn’t have done that.” I looked back over at him and felt slightly ashamed for having embarrassed him like that.

“Hey, don’t worry about it. From what I heard they probably deserved it,” he laughed, careful not to wake up a now sleeping Ellie. “Besides, maybe now they’ll be a little distracted when we play them tonight.”

“Yeah, about tonight…” I looked over at him to see if he caught what I meant.

“It’s your birthday, I know,” he smiled.

“We don’t have to do anything special, I know you have an important game and everything.”

“No, we’re doing something.” He smiled, and I leaned over to snuggle against his arm.

-

So, that night I had to face Sid again. And the rest of the Penguins. Caeleigh was handling it very well; she didn’t even seem upset about Geno, or she was hiding it really well. She and I watched the game up with the wags (when we weren’t skating) and I was so nervous Brandon was going to get hurt. It’s kind of obvious that Sid, Geno, Nealer, and a bunch of the Pens still don’t like him, and me, and I was waiting for a fight to break out. But nothing happened! It was weird, like they’d all moved on. Am I the only one who still cares?

The Sharks won but it was close. It was so weird watching Brandon take shots on Flower. He didn’t get a goal though, that would have been nice.

After the game I tried to get out of there as fast as I could so I wouldn’t have to see any more Penguins, but Brandon stopped me.

“We are taking you out to dinner,” he said, and I looked around to see who the hell he meant by ‘we.’

“You and…?” I asked.

“Caeleigh, sorry I didn’t say that? She’s waiting in the car,” Brandon said and took my hand. We walked to his car and Caeleigh was sitting in the back seat when I got in.

“Oh, um, surprise! Or something,” she said, barely looking up from her phone.

“Caels where are the balloons?” Brandon asked as he got in.

“Sorry, I forgot.”

“Stop sexting your boyfriend,” I teased her and she reluctantly put her phone away.

“I’m sorry. But happy birthday Emme!” She learned forward and tried to give me a hug.

We were all pretty tired so dinner was kind of boring. After dessert (which I hardly ever get to eat any more so I stuffed my face like a pig, it was embarrassing, but I don’t care, It’s my birthday,) Brandon gave me a box and I could tell he had wrapped it himself. It was really cute! But anyway, inside the box was a Sharks jersey. Brandon’s, of course. I held it up and looked at him questioningly.

“Because you don’t have any Sharks gear. The twins have matching shirts, so I thought you should have one too. So people know you’re my girl,” Brandon added with a smirk.

“I like it,” I smiled and slipped it on over my shirt.

I kissed him on the cheek and smiled. My birthday turned out better than I had expected. It was certainly better than last year when I’d had a threesome with James Neal and Carli.

Ugh, I don’t even want to think about that.

I haven’t talked to Carli in a while….

Wow, so much has happened since last year! I got pregnant (although I guess that actually happened before my birthday), I moved to Chicago, and then Carolina, and then back to Pittsburgh, and now I’m in San Jose!

And Canada, I lived in Canada for a while too, so I’m international now! Haha jk

After getting surprised by the Pens, I decided to actually look at the schedule.

Guess who we’re playing right before Christmas?

Yup, the Hurricanes.

So Eric will get to see his daughter for Christmas! It’s so cute!! (It’s so cute I’m crying)

He hasn’t seen her since this summer, but I’ve sent him a lot of pictures. Ellie’s grown so much, too.

I’m really excited for this now! But at the same time, I know I’m going to get really upset about this, like I did this summer. Something about seeing him with her makes me melt.

At least I have my first Sharks jersey! (First? How many do I need….)

Sincerely,

Emme

P.S.: Oh, yeah and Caeleigh leaves for Boston tomorrow. I’ve been trying not to think about it, because I am ridiculously sad about losing her. She’ll be so far away!! : (

Notes

I want to include Caeleigh’s adventures in Boston, so I’m thinking I’ll have her and Emme be pen pals or whatever. Yes? No?
( Because I’m running out of ideas for this story…)

Penguins are finally playing well in the playoffs! And Geno's hatty!!!!!