Either You Do...Or You Don't

Allison’s POV:

I shuffled the rest of the papers that were on my desk together and placed them into a drawer. It had been three days since James and I agreed to figure out our own lives before trying to figure out our “us” lives. I saw him once at the coffee shop, but he couldn’t talk because he had to get to the arena for the morning skate. Even though he wasn’t playing…the Pens lost that night in double OT and were eliminated from playoffs.

I texted him yesterday, but he never replied. I assumed he was just busy with the Jennifer stuff and couldn’t talk. “Allison, can we talk after work?” Brian’s voice awoke me from my thoughts.

“About what, Brian?” I asked

“Just some things, okay? Please?”

I sighed, “Okay. We’ll go out for supper or some thing somewhere quiet and talk.”

“Okay sounds good. See you.” he said, heading towards his cubical.

Jade, a girl from the office, came over to my desk and sat a file down. “Boss says to look over these. Make sure the information is correct and then give it back to him by the end of the day.”

“Okay. Thanks.” I replied, hoping she’d leave, but she didn’t. “Anything else?”

“What’s going on with you and Brian?” she blurted out

“What?”

“What’s going on with you and Brian? Amy and Daniel were talking about you two in the staff room…”

That was just great. Brian and I were “water cooler” talk now. “Uh…nothing really. We just went on a date…”

“Oh…okay. Bye.” she said heading back to her cubical. Surely by the end of the week, some rumor would be started about me and Brian…

I sighed and went back to work, checking over the files Jade left…before long, it was 5pm and time to go. Go to supper with Brian and figure things out with him…

James’ POV:

“So, what’s going on with you and Allison?” Melanie asked, as I brought in the last box of her things that were still at my place.

“Nothing really…we agreed that nothing could happen till we get our lives figured out.” I replied.

“Where do you want this?”

“In the bedroom is fine.” I took it into her room, sat it down and headed back out. “”Like what? Things with Jennifer?”

“Yeah…and Brian or whatever his fucking name is.”

“She told you about that, huh?” Melanie asked, handing me a bottle of water.

“Thanks. Yeah she told me…I’m not happy about it, but I can’t really judge her can I?”
Melanie shrugged, “I guess not…but didn’t she do it to get back at you?”

“I guess. I don’t know why really.”

“So…how are things going with Jennifer?”

“Well…she’s actually been cooperating. So I think we’re going to have joint custody. Like we were originally planning. That’d be easier. I don’t want to take the kids from her. She is their mother.”

Melanie nodded, “Yeah. Well thanks for helping me with this stuff.”

“No problem, Melanie.” I replied, smiling at her. Melanie gave me a smile back, but then looked away. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” she replied

“Are you sure? You don’t look fi…” I started to say before Melanie pushed past me, running into the bathroom and throwing up. I followed her and sat beside her on the floor. “You okay?”

Melanie nodded, “I think I just ate some thing bad."

"You need anything?" I asked, handing her my bottle of water.

She took a drink and shook her head, "I think I'm okay now. Thanks."

"Let me at least help you to the couch." I said, grabbing her hand, pulling her up and helping her to the couch. "You want your pillow or a blanket?"

Melanie nodded, "Thanks." I smiled and went to her room, grabbing her little quilt and her favorite pillow, handing them to her. "Why are you being so nice to me, James?"

"You're my friend..."

"You're not mad about what I did?"

I sighed, "I was, but that's in the past. What's done is done, Melanie...neither of us can change what we did. Not just you. Not just me. We both did something wrong, but there's no point in dwelling on the past, okay?"

Melanie nodded and looked at me with tears in her eyes, "I really am sorry."

"I know, Melanie. Me too..."

Allison’s POV:

I tapped my fingers on my water glass as Brian headed towards our table. I gave him a small wave as he made his way through the restaurant. “Hey.” he said, sitting down.

“Hi.” I replied. “So what do you want?”

“I want to talk about ‘us’.” he replied

I sighed, “Brian, there is no ‘us’. We just had sex…”

“I like you, Allison and I know you like me too.”

“I do…but…”

“But him. Fuck, Allison, this guy has cheated on you, lied to you and hurt you so much. What is it about him that make you want to stay? Why can’t you just fucking leave him? He treats you like shit…”

“But he doesn’t…” I protested

“But he does. When you were with him, you were sad. Everyone in the office could see it. When you were broken up for that short time, was the only time any of us had seen you smile. He is an asshole.”

“But I love him.” I stammered

“Okay, but does he really love you. Or is he just using you to be close to Melanie.”
That part hit me like a bus. I felt the tears run down my cheeks, “That’s not true. He does love me…”

“Then why aren’t you with him?”

“Because…there’s just issues we have to work on…”

“Yeah, his issues.”

“Mine too, Brian. You think I’m perfect or something?”

“No, Allison. I don’t think you’re perfect. I know that you aren’t and I want to be with you, anyways.”

Notes