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Ifs and Maybes

i merely visit on the weekends

The Blackhawks were finally on a winning streak, and tonight's win pushed them ahead to the top of the NHL standings. It was a huge win for the boys and an even bigger win for Patrick. With a few goals and an assist, he had a great night.

Post-game celebration was necessary and Maddy didn't even hesitate to saying yes when Patrick asked if she wanted to join him and his teammates for a few drinks at a nearby bar to toast to their 6-2 victory over the Dallas Stars. He had been so caring and attentive the last two weeks that she felt it would do them good to hang out with friends and celebrate.

The bar was one she had only been to once before, and with all the excitement surrounding the win, she was happy to partake in the drinking festivities. Patrick made a beeline for the bar as soon as they got there and ordered a margarita for Maddy and a Jack and Coke for himself.

She didn't mind him having a drink or two because they were well deserved. Pat had a four-point night and she wasn't going to stop him from celebrating. They were having a great time, enjoying the company of not only each other but the other teammates that joined them. But when two drinks turned into four and Patrick started tossing back shots of whiskey, Maddy knew how the night was going to end. He continuously tossed his head back and laughed as a group of people, some of them being his teammates, surrounded him near the bar.

She was annoyed more than anything and distanced herself from him for most of the night, staying close to Panarin and Corey Crawford. They managed to turn her night around by getting her tipsy, making her laugh, and forcing her to dance along with them to the most absurd song she had ever heard.

She was actually having a good time, all the while ignoring Pat, until one of his teammates walked up to the table she was at holding onto a very blacked out and nearly passed out Patrick. He was stumbling and tripping over his own feet and mumbling nonsensical things. Once he lifted his gaze from the floor and spotted Maddy, he pushed away Brent Seabrook and sloppily fell into the seat next to her, throwing his arm around her and pulling her into his sweaty chest.

"Madelin. Take me home and have your way with me." Pat drunkenly slurred and tried to kiss her cheek. Her reaction was almost instant, as she pushed him away before his lips even hit her skin.

"Pat, stop." she hissed at him. Patrick rolled his eyes and tried once more to pull her closer to his side.

"Oh c'mon," he exasperatedly groaned. "First star tonight. I should get a prize for that, not blue balls."

A few of the guys chuckled, but most looked to Maddy for her reaction. She was annoyed before, but now she was downright pissed. Not only was he making a spectacle of himself, but he was embarrassing her in front of their friends and his teammates.

"I can show you ju-," he hiccuped, "just how good my endurance is. Y'know like when we--" a furious hand met he chest, effectively silencing him.

"PATRICK," Maddy glared at him. The things he was beginning to say were beyond inappropriate and it started to make her uncomfortable, not to mention angry.

Maddy glanced around and noticed that all of the attention was on her, causing her cheeks to turn an intense shade of red. It was obvious that their time at the bar had come to an end.

"I should take him home," she said aloud to no one in particular. Maddy stood and tried to pull Pat up with her, only to watch him struggle and fall lazily back into the booth.

"Guys I'm fine," he waved them away, but almost hit is head on the lamp above the table.

"Sure bud." Jon immediately stepped forward and placed Pat's arm around his neck, helping him stand.

"I'll help you get him home," he offered a small smile to Maddy, who appreciatively nodded her head. She waved a final goodbye at the teammates that stood around their table, taking note of their slight looks of pity. She knew what they were all thinking and it didn't make things any easier for her at all.

The trek back to their condo was nothing short of a shit show. Patrick nearly threw up in the cab they had taken back to their building and fought Jon every step of the way as they stumbled into the elevator and into the condo. The moment Jon let Patrick fall onto his bed, Pat was out cold.

"You can sleep in the guest room," Maddy said to Jon after pulling the duvet over Patrick's chest. Jon nodded and made his way out of the room, leaving Maddy to her own thoughts.
She placed a trashcan beside the bed and made sure he was propped up on his side. The sight before her, with Pat completely passed out and surely too drunk to even remember how he acted in the morning, tore her to pieces. Just when she thought things were getting better, that he had realized how damaging this habit of his was, everything fell a part. Her pleas went unheard and his promises unkept. She didn't even make it out of the room before tears clouded her vision and started to trickle down her cheeks.

Jon heard her quiet gasps before he even saw her enter the guest room. She leaned against the side of the entry way and completely broke down. The combination of emotions and alcohol had surely taken a toll.

"I don't know what to do anymore, Jon," she managed to breathe out between sobs. Her face fell into her hands as she let out every emotion she had felt since his perpetual drinking habits started to get worse.

Jon stared wide-eyed and was at a loss for words. He wasn't accustomed to seeing Maddy so down and emotional and, quite frankly, he didn't know what to say or do to comfort her. But the silence didn't last long, as Maddy continued to voice her string of thoughts.

"He's not the same guy I agreed to marry six months ago. That guy laying passed out in our bed is not the man I agreed to marry. God, Jon." she swiped her hand over her face, but the tears continued to fall. "I can't even see myself marrying the guy he's become."

The last half of her words came out as a whisper and it felt almost soul-crushing to actually admit her most inner thoughts; thoughts that had been placed on the back burner the last few weeks. Patrick had made her believe that he was really making progress, but she came to the realization that it had all been a fascade. She was so afraid to admit it to herself, and it was even scarier to finally voice those thoughts aloud.

Every fear she had developed in the last few months since their engagement came rushing out of her mouth. Yet there was no sense of relief now that her thoughts were finally out in the open. It hurt just as much now as it did when she kept it all bottled up.

"I can't even make up any excuses for him anymore. I'm so close to just packing a bag and leaving."

Her final confession pushed her over the edge and Maddy began to cry even harder. She was practically gasping for air and Jon watched in horror as one of his best friends crumbled before him.

Jon felt like such a shitty friend for not realizing how bad things were between two of his closest friends. Everyone had sort of turned a blind eye to Patrick's drunken antics, but he had no idea how devastating of an impact that would have on his relationship with Maddy. Patrick never gave off the impression that his relationship was in any type of distress. To everyone else, they were happily looking forward to their wedding and spending their life together. Jon absolutely adored the girl sobbing in his arms and it broke his heart to see her so distraught.

"It's just a stage Maddy. He's hanging on to the last days of bachelor freedom as much as he can." Jon tried to make up an excuse for his best friend's behavior, but he knew even that wasn't a good enough justification for the way he had been acting as of late. He had warned his best friend several times that he was heading down a reckless path and it was clear now that while Patrick was out having the time of his life, he was destroying the things and people he loved along the way.

"The longer he hangs on the more likely I am to just walk away from him," she cried. Jon let out a sigh and knew that a serious talk with Patrick was necessary. "Why can't he just be like you."

The words stung both to say and for Jon to hear.

"Things will start to look up Mads, I promise." He said softly, as he pulled her closer into his chest and comforted her. Maddy wanted to protest, but she was too drained to even mutter a single word. She wanted so badly to believe him, but everything Patrick had done in the last few months that built up to tonight contradicted that very statement. The words, however, were on the tip of her tongue and continuously ran through her mind before she finally cried herself to sleep in his arms.

No, Jon, they won't.



Love it, glad to see you've updated and I can't wait to read more soon!

KitoftheKat KitoftheKat

I love it !

hockaayy hockaayy

Loving it!

anna anna

It's hard to deal with alcoholics... Sometimes they need to hit rock bottom before they can get better... Some people still keep drinking. I'm curious to see what she does, even if Jon talks to him, will it be a permanent fix or a temporary fix? I think it's one of those things that he needs to see for himself, you know? Having heard her admit that or something.... Anyways awesome chapter and I can't wait for more.

So good!

hockaayy hockaayy