AAOOOSC! Playoffs

On the last Tuesday of April, Tuukka is cooking dinner while Brad and the pony is setting up the dining table.
"No, Pony, the fork goes on the left side on the plate, not on the right!" Brad tells the pony while setting a white plate on the table mat.
The pony makes some squeaking noises while looking at Brad in confusion.
"The fork"--Brad points to the fork that is by the pony's hooves-- "does not go there."
"M-ow." The pony looks down at the fork and picks is up with its mouth. It trots on top of the table to the other side of the plate and drops it on the left side.
"There we goes!" Brad puts down another plate. "Now do that to the rest of the forks."
The pony looks around the table with big eyes, seeing that it did it all wrong with the other two forks. "Mehhh..." It walks over to another fork and moves it to the other side.
Brad sighs, looking at the clock that is by the window. "Tuukka, what's today?"
"You don't know what today is?" Tuukka asks, stirring something in a steaming pot.
"I'm just making sure..."
"Tiistai." (Tuesday.)
"What?"
"Toosday." (Tuesday.)
"Tuesday‽ Is today really Tuesday‽" Brad places his paws on his flurry head with his eyes wide.
"Yea..."
Brad gasps. "Ohmigosh, this is terrible! Très mauvais!" He jumps off the table and makes his way to the counter top. (Very bad!)
"What's so bad?"
Brad jumps onto the counter top from a high chair. "Every Tuesday night, Roberto and I go eat burritos!!!"
"Who's Roberto?" Tuukka turns around, giving the honey badger an odd look.
"He's my friend! He's also the goalie of the Florida Panthers!"
"Ohhh...you go eat with Roberto." Tuukka goes back cooking.
"Okay, thank you! Where's my phone?" Brad spots his iPhone next to the bowl of fruits. "Aha!" He slides over to it and grabs it with his paw. "I gotta tell 'im that I'm running late!" He turns it on, put couldn't slide to unlock. "Aiy, no... I can't use my phone! Stupid paws!" Brad freezes for a moment. "I can't go eat burritos with Roberto: I'm a honey badger!!! But I still gotta call 'im so that I can tell him that I'm not gonna make it!" He tries to unlock his phone, but the screen just turns black on him. "Tuukka, help me call him!"
Tuukka grumbles something in Finnish and lumbers over to Brad. He grabs his phone with a serious look and unlocks his phone. "What is passcode?"
"Uhhh...six, three, one, one."
Tuukka punches in the numbers. "Where's number?"
"He's in my contacts--you can't miss him."
Tuukka taps on Brad's phone a few times and then places the phone in front of him; the phone is on speaker phone and is ringing.
"Thank you, Tuukka!" Brad smiles at the phone.
"Ei hätää." Tuukka walks back to the stove. (No problem)
"Ello?" Roberto Luongo's voice calls from Brad's phone.
"'Ey, Roberto, my friend, how are you today!" Brad greets happily.
"Good, good, and you?"
"Eh, I could be doing better! I hate to say this, but I can't make it tonight to Tuesday night burrito night...I'm sorry." Brad's head hangs down.
"Wha? ¿Por qué?" (Why?)
"Well...it's something that you would not understand..."
"Brad, you're my friend! There's nothing to hide from me and I'll understand! Trust me, mi amigo!" (my friend!)
"Vraiment?" (Really?)
"¡Si! Come on over to the burrito shop we always hang out in Boston! I'm waiting for you!" (Yes!)
"Ummm...but...I can't...I can't show myself in public."
"That's weird... Why?"
"Because Imma...Imma..."
"You're a ¿qué?" (what?)
"I'm a honey badger!!!" Brad squeaks at the phone.
Roberto bursts out laughing. "Lovely joke there, Brad! I know you're a honey badger--that's your nickname--!"
"Non, non, Roberto, I'm dead serious! I'm an actually honey badger!" (No, no,)
"Get yourself over here, you honey badger you! I'll be waiting!"
Brad gulps. "D'accord..." (Okay...)
"Alright! ¡Adiós!" (Good-bye!)
"Au revoir..." Brad's voice fades as Roberto hangs up. (Bye...)
"What language is dat?" Tuukka looks at Brad with a weird look.
"Roberto was speaking Spanish... I was speaking French. And now I have to show that IMMA HONEY BADGER!!! ACK!!!" Brad makes a scared look with his paws on his head.
"Don't worry, you do good. You go."
"Okay...good bye, Tuukka. Wish me luck!" Brad leaps off the counter top.
"You don't need ride?"
"No, I can walk... It's not that far." Brad begins to crawl slowly towards the entrance.
"Okei. Pidä hauskaa!" Tuukka chuckles deeply while walk over to the dinner table with the big, steaming pot. (Okay. Have fun!)
"Bye." Brad trots out into the cool, spring night.

About ten minutes later, Brad arrives at the burrito shop, spotting Roberto sitting outside on a white table underneath a yellow and red umbrella.
"Hey! Roberto!" Brad shouts.
Roberto perks up, looking around his surrounds. "Brad? Is that you? Where are you?"
Brad jumps onto the top of the table. "I'm here!" He stands on his hind legs, showing himself.
Roberto looks in front of him with his brown eyes widen; he gasps. "Brad! Is that really you‽"
"Yes..."
"You're a...you're..."
"Honey badger." Brad sits down like an ordinary honey badger. "I've been turned into a honey badger."
"Oh, I thought you were joking about that!"
"Nope..." Brad shakes his head. "I'm actually one."
"Can I pet you? You look really tempting to pet." Roberto has his hand out towards his little friend.
"I have these." Brad shows off his claws.
"I'll take that as a no." Roberto pulls his hand away. "Well, I'm glad that you made it to our Tuesday night burrito night! It would've been muy terrible if you missed it!" (very terrible)
"Yea, I'd feel terrible... But you don't think that it's weird talking to a honey badger?"
"No, 'cause I know it's you! I'm still talking to you!"
"Vraiment?" (Really?)
"Si! But there's something interesting going on with me as well, because I can do this--" Claws pop out from Roberto's hand. "I can grow claws!"
Brad makes a horrified look. "That's like me..."
"Yea, and I can jump really high...like a panther..." Roberto puts his claws away. "I also have really great smelling sense and hearing and vision... I started noticing this ever since I've moved to the Panthers..." He makes a confused look. "But it's weird because nowadays I can activate them sometimes...but other times, it's like as if I don't even have them..."
"Hm, well, look at that! We're like twinning!" Brad chuckles.
"Yup! 'Cause we're best friends!" Roberto fist bumps with Brad. "Let's go grab our burritos now!"
"Yea...I'll stay out here..." Brad smiles really big.
"Okay, just don't let anyone take you away!"
"Remember, mon ami, I got these!" Brad pulls out his claws. (...my friend...)
"Riiight! I'll be back, mi amigo!" Roberto walks away. (...my friend!)
So they talk and eat their favorite burritos during the night happily.

Notes