AAOOOSC! Playoffs

"Tuukka going to Canada now!!" Tuukka shouts as he marches over to the front door, carrying his suitcase, hockey bag, and backpack.
"Not...without...me!!!" Brad shouts behind Tuukka.
Tuukka turns around, looking down with a confused look.
There is Brad about five feet away from him, hauling his hockey bag with all of his strength.
"Ha, ha, ha, you can't play, Brad." Tuukka stands in front of the door, blocking the way.
"Yes I can!" Brad cries, tugging the bag with him, getting closer to Tuukka. "Who says I can't‽"
"Well, you honey badger--you can't play like honey badger."
"I'm gonna play like this whether you like it or not!!!" Brad throws the strap of his bag down in frustration.
"Why you want to play so much?"
"Because I will not let you slack off and let the Canadians tie the series!!! Brad grabs the strap of the bag with his mouth and takes off at Tuukka, trying to get past him.
Tuukka stops him by simply putting his leg out in front of the mad honey badger, letting it hang on it like a rag. "You no go." He drops his stuff and hops over to sofa, shaking Brad off of him.
"But this is not fair! You can't lose like this just because of a pony!!!"
"Bye, Brad." Tuukka walks out of the house with his bags, slamming the door locked before Brad could escape and chase after him.
"No-oh, Tuukka, noooo!!!" Brad scratches on the door like a dog who wants its owner to come back. "You can't do this!!!" He bangs on the door, having a mini temper tantrum. "NOOOO--!!!"
"M-ow."
Brad stops crying and banging and turns around, seeing the pony with a confused look. The pony looks the same, except a whole lot fatter.
"Oh, it's you."
"M-ow."
"This is all your fault!" Brad begins to storm away on his four paws. "You better appreciate what Tuukka's doing for you!" He walks back into the living room.
The pony has a hard time following him since it's stomach is very big, so it practically drags itself in order to move with its hooves. Every time it drags itself, it says, "'Ow. 'Ow. 'Ow. 'Ow..."
Brad leaps onto the sofa and curls up, looking at the pony with a bored look, who is having a hard time getting to him. Suddenly, he starts feeling for the poor pony, and gets an idea of what to do instead of moping around. "Pony?"
The pony stops moving and looks up at Brad. "M-ow?"
"You wanna have a better way of getting around than dragging yourself like a boat trying to sail on land?" Brad sits up straight.
"M-ow!"
"Okay, follow me!" He jumps off of the sofa and trots blithesomely towards the garage.
The pony starts dragging itself behind Brad. "'Ow. 'Ow. 'Ow."
Brad stops and turns around. "No, no, no, you stay there." He holds his paw out towards the pony. "I'll go get whatcha need to make moving easier."
"Ohhh..." The pony just lays on the ground, looking at Brad.
"Alright, now be a good pony and stay there. I'll be back in a flash." Brad rushes off into the hallway, skidding into the garage.
In there, he found an abandoned skateboard and some string. "Aha!" He pushes the skateboard onto the wooden floor of the hallway and places himself and the string on it and rolls back into the living room.
The pony is at the same place Brad left it. It make some squeaking noises, looking at what Brad brought in with awe.
"It's a skateboard!" He jumps off of it. "And string to tie you to it!" He raises the string up into the air. "Now...to get you on it... Hmmm..." He pushes the skateboard next to the pony, which looks at it like it was an alien from another planet. "Can you get on it? I'll hold it for you."
The pony looks at Brad with a bewildered look. "M-ow?"
"Get on it."
The pony lifts the two hooves that are on its right side on to the skate board.
"Good..." Brad grabs the hooves and pulls them towards him, trying to the pony onto the skateboard. "Help me out, Pony!" he grunts.
The pony lifts itself off of the ground and plops onto the skateboard.
"Whew, thanks!" Brad wiped his forehead with the back of his paw.
The pony looks around with awe in its huge eyes as it sees that it is now on higher ground. It starts to shake its hooves everywhere with an excited look on its face, like as if it wanted to fly.
"Alright, now try to navigate yourself."
The pony looks at Brad, giving him an are-you-serious-? look and tries to move; its hooves barely touch the ground.
"Why do your hooves have to be so short?" Brad mutters. "Well, look at me, I'm short myself even when I'm in normal form! Hah!" He looks at the pony on the skateboard and then the string that is now on the floor. "This was suppose to tie you on the skateboard so that you won't fall over, but..." He picks the rope up from the ground. "...I think I have an idea that'll help you out, but it's an idea I hate."
"M-ow!"
"You're tellin' me to use it, aren't you? Fine."
So Brad ends up pulling the pony on the skateboard with the rope.
"Oh la la, you're more heavier than you look!" Brad puffs out.
"Ooo..." The pony shakes its hooves up and down happily.
"Will you please stop it with the hooves?" Brad snaps.
"Meh." The pony stops moving its hooves.
"Okay. I've taken like, what, six trips around the house with you? What do you want to do?"
"Uhhh..." The pony looks around while making squeaky noises. "M-ow!" It nods towards the room with the computer in it.
"You want to go onto the computer?"
"M-ow!!!" It shakes its hooves up and down again, but immediately stops when it saw Brad's irritated look.
"Alright, let's go." Brad tugs the skateboard into the computer room, stopping next to the desk chair. "Oh man, how are you gonna get on top?"
"M-ow." The pony slides itself off of the skateboard and props its hooves on the chair, trying to heave itself up. Brad helps a bit by giving it a push to get itself onto the chair. "'Ow!"
"You're smart." Brad leaps onto the arm rest of the chair, then onto the desk top, next to the computer. "So what do you want to do on here?"
"M-ow."
"You know what?" Brad looks down at the pony with inquiring eyes. "I practically know nothing about you, so lets have a little interview about you, okay?"
"M-ow!!!" The pony bobs up and down a bit on its chair.
"Okay, first off, how the heck did you get pregnant?"
"Mehhh..." The pony narrows its eyes at Brad.
"I'll take that as, 'Don't get into my personal business, furball.'"
The pony closes its eyes and nods in agreement.
"Okay, then, what's your name? Your real name? I hope you have one because 'Pony' is a very sad name to have."
"Meh moo-ee." The pony babbles.
Brad looks at it with an odd look. "What?"
"Meh...meh...moo-ee."
"You okay, there?"
"M-ow."
"What's your name?"
"Meh moo-ee."
"Meh mooy?"
"M-ow." The pony shakes its head. "Meh moo-ee."
"Ah, forget this, you can't talk! Here." Brad grabs a notepad and a pen and places it in front of the pony. "Write your name."
"Ooo..." The pony just slams one of its hooves on the pen, trying to pick it up.
"With your mouth!"
"'Ow." The pony grabs the pen with its mouth and tries to write its name, but it turns out to look like scribbles.
"I take it that you didn't go to pony school. Hm." Brad thinks for a moment. "Can you type out your name?"
"M-ow!"
"Alright, let's see that!" He carefully places the keyboard in front of the pony; he wakes up the screen by slamming his paw on the mouse multiple times. "Okay..." He goes to the typing program and pulls out a new project. "Type your name!"
The pony looks at the keyboard and begins typing one letter at a time, pretty slowly.
"E...L...space?" Brad looks at the screen weirdly. "C...H...O...O...W...E... El Choowe?"
"M-ow!!!" El Choowe nods its head up and down excitedly.
"Now who the heck named you that? Unless you names yourself, then that'll be totally understandable." Brad crosses his arms.
"M-ow..."
"What?"
"M-ow..." El Choowe eyes the mouse.
"You want the mouse?"
"M-ow..."
"Tell me where you want to go."
"M-ow..."
"Type it out!"
"M-ow."
"Fine." Brad gives the mouse to El Choowe.
El Choowe clicks on the compass icon and goes to Google, searching who named it 'El Choowe.'
"Peyton Manning?" Brad gawks at the screen as Peyton's profile comes up on Google.
"M-ow!" El Choowe agrees.
"Manning had you before Tuukka?"
"M-ow!" El Choowe nods its head.
"I would've never had guessed. But I can see that since you have the Broncos colors." Brad looks at the pony from ear to tail.
"M-ow..."
"But how did Tuukka get you from him?"
"M-ow..."
"Long story?"
"Yee-ow..." El Choowe nods its head slowly.
"Okay... Well, would you like to see how I actually look like?"
"M-ow?" El Choowe cocked its head, looking at Brad weirdly.
"Yea, this is not actually me--I just got turned into a honey badger..."
"Ooo..." El Choowe looks down at the mouse and keyboard and then back at Brad.
"Here, let me show you." Brad takes the mouse and keyboard and beings typing his name on the search bar. Then he hits enter, seeing the page go blank for a moment, then pulling up his profile. "Aha, that I am! Oh man, I miss myself..." Brad looks at his headshot with big eyes.
"'Ow?" El Choowe makes a confused look.
"Yea, that's me." Brad points to his headshot. "Can you see the resemblance?"
El Choowe shakes his head slowly.
"Well, I can kinda see that. I mean, what human looks like a honey badger. Hehe, now to come to think of it, that'll be interesting if someone looked like a honey badger."
"M-ow..."
"So, yea, that's me. Anything else you want to show me?"
"M-ow..."
"You want the keyboard?"
"M-ow..." El Choowe nods its head.
"Okay, here." Brad hands it over the mouse and keyboard.
El Choowe goes onto Google Images.
"Oh no, no, no, El Choowe, can you please get outta there‽ There are some things you'd rather not see!" Brad covers the images with his body and paws.
"'Ow..." El Choowe clicks on the search bar and highlights Brad's name. Then it types the word 'carrots' and hits enter, changing the pictures of Brad to a bunch of carrots.
"Thank you." Brad slinks back next to the computer. "Why did you look up carrots?"
"M-ow." El Choowe starts chewing on the arm rest.
"Oh, you're hungry? Tu as faim?" (Are you hungry?)
El Choowe stops chewing and gawks at Brad.
"I take it you didn't learn any French." Brad jumps off the table, onto the floor. "You're suppose to say: 'Oui, j'ai faim!' Or in your language: 'M-ow.' C'mon, let's go eat!" (Yes, I am hungry!)
"M-ow!!!" El Choowe climbs back down from the chair slowly and gets on the skateboard, heading out into the kitchen with Brad pulling it.

Notes