It's Just Me and the Radio
The winds outside howled bringing the down pour of rain in currents against the roof and sides of the house, Sasha lay still in her bed listening to the world around her. It was late, she’d stopped looking at the clock at 11:45pm, she figured by now it was at least 1:30am. Blaming her lack of sleep on the rain she reaches over switching on her radio figuring the music would give her something else to concentrate on, pure static comes through the small speakers of her old boom box, she slowly turns the dial until a voice comes in clearly it’s some 80’s era country crooner, the melody is soothing so she leaves the station on rolling back over to the warm spot in her bed.
She listens to the words of the calm melody songs finding a common theme of love lost and sadness. Just like that the memories from December flood back in, Damien her…. Well she wasn’t sure what to call him, they hadn’t talked since that day and since it was early May she figured she should start calling him her ex, but that felt so final and she wasn’t ready for that. Another song starts on the radio as the rain falls even harder which she was thinking was impossible. Two years, she thought to herself, two years summed up in a few minute phone call and now here she was letting late night country radio remind her just how much that hurt.
When Sasha first met Damien it was a funny accident, she was a nurse working at a local hospital and a bunch of the Red Wings players were supposed to be stopping by, it was an unusual visit because they were coming not to visit sick people or children, but, to visit with new parents and pass out these ridiculously cute little blankets with the Red Wings logo on it and the year. The players were running late though because of construction, Sasha was hoping to be able to meet some of the players, however, she had plans that night and really needed to leave in order not to let anyone down.
She grabbed her bag from the reception counter and turned pushing open the doors of the maternity ward and heard a muffled ouch on the other side followed by a round of men laughing. She mumbled a sorry before realizing she’d opened the door in Damien Brunner’s face she then apologized profusely and basically ran out the door. It would be a week later that he showed up again and asked her out for coffee.
They’d hit it off so well and were practically inseparable, when the call came that he would be going to New Jersey, she applied to be transferred to a hospital there, she was denied though, the hospitals in the area were staffed to capacity and the one she was working with was short handed. Knowing how important her career was Damien told her to stay and they would work it out, which they had, until December.
She was working the late shift and had just walked into a room to check on a woman who was in her 18th hour of labor. The Devils game was on and Sasha watched out of the corner of her eye while making sure both mom and baby were doing well, in the 5 minutes she was in the room she’d not seen his number 12, she was sure she’d just missed him told the expectant parents that the doctor would be in to check her shortly and made her way to the nurses’ station.
The whole 3rd period ticked by and not once had she seen Damien on the ice, she was starting to fear she’d missed him getting seriously injured. She tried her hardest to push the thought out of her mind by busying herself for the rest of the shift, and by the time she got home she figured no messages from Damien must mean he was ok and went to bed. She never expected to wake up to a notification on her phone saying the Devils had placed him on waivers. She expected his call saying he would not play for an AHL team even less, at the time she thought he was reassuring her a team was interested. When he cleared waivers her heart dropped, she knew he would be upset and braced herself for his call, she had a pep talk all worked out on how he would get back to the NHL level soon that they would see how good he is.
She wiped the tear that fell from her eye laughing at the irony of the song on the radio, it was called “Songs About Rain” and Gary Allan was singing it, the whole premise of the song was a heart broken man driving in the car and only hearing sad songs about rain, he talked about how theirs many songs about happy things but tonight when he’s already sad all he keeps getting are sad songs. Sasha had to laugh at the timing of the song but was soon feeling the same way he was. Every song seemed to be pushing her closer to a breaking point, she was exhausted but she couldn’t sleep, the wind and rain weren’t letting up and here she lay in bed listening to a slew of heartbroken anthems.
When he called she answered on the first ring, as expected he was mumbling in Swiss German, when he did remember to speak in English his speech was so rapid Sasha could barely understand him, when she expressed this with an irritated sigh he said “I’m going home, I’m sorry” he mumbled goodbye and the line went dead. At first she was excited at the prospect of him coming back to Detroit and then it hit her like a mack truck he had said he was going home, not coming home. He was going back to Switzerland, at the realization she called him back and he confirmed her suspicion he said he was sorry again and then ended the conversation abruptly once more. No mention was made of her joining him, or the state of their relationship.
She stares at her phone; hitting send on his name is all it would take a 6 hour time difference meant it would be a seemingly normal time to call. In the 5 months since he’d left there had been no communication between the two of them, Sasha had tried to call a few times but each time it went to voicemail, finally she stopped calling the international charges just to get his voicemail weren’t worth it. She figured when he stopped sulking he would call, say he missed her, and ask her to come visit, or even say he was coming back, but it had been 5 months.
Every song playing on the radio was just reminding her that she was in love with him, she was ready to follow him anywhere, and then he left. She wanted to say if he would have asked her to go she would have followed but of all the languages spoken within the country of Switzerland she spoke zero and though she would try her hardest to learn that would be a big culture shock for her. Of course Damien had gone through a similar culture shock coming to the States. He couldn’t have expected her to just go any more than she should have expected him to stay, but had they both been thinking that the day he called and said he was going home? That was something Sasha didn’t have an answer for.
She finally looks at the clock, the numbers 4:45am blaring at her like a cruel reminder she wasn’t getting any sleep tonight, she was at least thankful it was her day off, but the wind and rain still seemed to be coming down just as hard. The morning crew was just starting to talk on the radio station she was listening to, at this point in the night she was on a teetering edge of calling a man she hadn’t seen or spoken to in at least 5 months, sure she could tune out the radio, or turn it off, but did it matter right now? She was already sitting at her breaking point one song would tip her right back into making an international call and praying he would answer. The logical part of her brain said he wouldn’t answer but the part of her that was trying to fall over the edge of the grand canyon of sad songs had a tiny bit of hope that was growing with each song she heard, her emotions so precariously poised on the edge that it would only take one song to make her hit send.
Outside it seemed like the wind had just died right out, and she had to rub her eyes to make sure she wasn’t seeing things, the heavy darkness was starting to lift casting slightly lighter shadows on her floor. The speaker on the radio announces the next song, the same Gary Allan who’d sung to her maybe a couple hours before -she really lost track of the songs she’d heard- was crooning through her speakers again this time with a song called “Every Storm (Runs Out of Rain)” a once again ironic twist to the situation going on in her head and outside her bedroom window. This time it was like he was telling her she would be just fine, almost like he was talking her down from the fictional edge she’d put herself on by listening to sad sappy songs while a storm had raged outside.
Now as the morning was slowly trying it’s hardest to break through the cloud covered stormy blackness of the night, she was receiving a message of hope. Sure it may hurt now, and maybe she would once again end up one song away from breaking down and calling Damien, maybe she would one day find out what happened between them, but today was not the day to do that. The ‘storm’ had run out of rain just like the song said it would, as the song came to an end she switches the radio off and closes her eyes, though it eluded her all night she begins to feel sleep taking over her features as she holds on to the promise of a single song ‘every heartbreak will fade away, just like every storm runs, runs out of rain’.
Song, One Song Away- Cassadee Pope.
Requested by @dbrunner24
I hope this doesn't disappoint in any way shape or form. Also, I'm still taking request, though I've got another already lined up and a few ideas of my own I will try to get to them all in a timely fashion!