White Orchids

“So, before we start, you are positive that this is what you want to do?”

Nicki glanced over at Tyler, who was already looking at her. He gave her a subtle nod, sparking a grin the size of Texas on her face.

“We are absolutely sure,” she responded, turning back to Jane, who sat directly across from them at her desk.

“Alright, I’m glad to hear it. I’m going to be honest here, the two of you seem to have genes that are much too good to be wasted.”

She couldn’t help but shove her elbow into Tyler’s. For weeks now, she had been saying the same thing. Nicki watched as Jane rose slowly from her leather computer chair and strode across the room, stiff as a board. Jane was the polar opposite of Amelia, the adoption agent. She was straight laced, professional, and a bit stuffy. Although Nicki usually despised people of that nature, she could tell Jane had a good heart, and it made her bearable.

Jane pulled a few items from the middle shelf of a sturdy, chestnut bookcase, which had obviously been repurposed to serve a different role in her upscale office. Another look across at Tyler nearly forced a round of giggles from Nicki. His cheeks were shamefully red; they both knew what was coming, but she never imagined that he might be bashful about it.

“Tyler, if you’ll follow me,” Jane said, gesturing towards the door. Once he got up to follow her she added, “I’ll be back in just a minute for you.”

Nicki nodded her head and watched her husband walk stiffly out of the room and back into the lobby from which they’d entered, only ten minutes prior. She felt terrible that he had to do this the morning before the biggest game of the season. That night, he would be fighting on home ice for the ultimate prize. She hoped, she prayed, that she would be gazing down at him from the suite, celebrating with the team he had become a leader to. It was easy to remember the excitement from his last Stanley Cup victory, and all of the emotions that were running rampant throughout the city. It was exhilarating and intoxicating and was certainly something that she was ready to feel again.

“Are you ready?”

Jane’s voice snapped Nicki out of her daydreams, and quickly back to reality. She had been ready since the first moment they stepped into her office two weeks ago.

“It won’t hurt, will it?” It was a question that had been on her mind constantly.

“No, not at all. It might be a bit uncomfortable for a moment, but it’s quick and painless,” Jane explained in a comforting manner. “The room is right this way.”

She let Jane lead her through the door and into the same lobby she’d taken Tyler through. As they walked through the connecting hallway, she found herself wondering which room he’d been placed in, already having withdrawals from the lack of his presence. He had been so busy practicing and preparing and playing for the cup, he’d barely had any time for her. It was something that she expected, but as ready as she was to accept that, it never eased the painstaking loneliness. It was times such as this that she missed their son the most; craving the company he’d provided, even from deep within her womb. Nicki brushed the falling tears from her cheeks and threw her shoulders back, reminding herself that what they were doing now was the next best thing. They were moving forward, and there was no room for living in the past.

Jane stopped short in front of an open door at the very end of the hallway and let Nicki enter first. Strewn about inside of the small, square room were machines and monitors, with a gynecologist chair in the center. On the chair was a folded hospital gown, which she assumed could only be for her.

“You can change into the gown and make yourself comfortable for now, I have one other client to tend to, my apologies for the short notice. Do you mind waiting a half hour or so? I can send someone in with a magazine from the lobby if you’d like?”

“I’m all set in here, take your time,” Nicki assured her, picking up the light fabric from the plastic covered chair.

After thanking her for her patience, Jane left her by herself in the cold, sterile room. Nicki let out a long sigh before she began to disrobe. She couldn’t help but wonder how Tyler was doing, and wished that he was by her side. It disgusted her how much she missed him, with the full knowledge that he was just a few rooms away from her.

As if a signal from above, her phone began to ring from the pocket of her jeans, which were now lying in a heap on the floor. Nicki fidgeted with her pants, untangling them before she could retrieve her phone. Her heart thudded faster as Tyler’s name popped up on her sleek glass screen, and her lips pulled into a frown as she read the text he sent her.

Ty 10:01:47: SOS Room 111

Instantly, the panic set in. She had not the slightest clue what could have been wrong enough to warrant an SOS text from him. Not once in the past had she received one, and she feared the worst. Without a second thought, she bolted out of her room, hospital gown flapping behind her and exposing her backside. Nicki scanned the hallway and quickly found the room. She raised a fist and hurriedly brought it down on the door.

“Ty? Tyler it’s me,” she called, afraid of what she might find when she entered.

In a matter of seconds, the door creaked open, but she didn’t see anybody in the room.

“Ty?” she said quietly, becoming a bit nervous. “Baby, you in there?”

“Yeah, just come in.”

She finally exhaled the breath she’d been holding in at the sound of his voice and stepped through the doorway, closing the door promptly behind her. As she turned, she nearly burst out laughing. Tyler stood before her, magazine in one hand, little plastic container in the other, and a frazzled look on his face.

“What’s the SOS sweetheart? You okay?”

Tyler hung his head, defeated as she’d ever seen him.

“I... I need your help,” he mumbled, staring down at his feet.

A giggle pushed its way through her lips, and she threw a hand over her mouth trying to stop it. He shot her an exasperated look and she closed the space between them, locking her arms around his waist.

“I’m sorry babe, I didn’t mean to laugh. What do you need help with?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” he retorted, holding up the magazine for her to see.

“But… isn’t this something you do by yourself?” Nicki asked, slightly confused by what he was asking her to do.

“I haven’t had to worry about it, ever since I met you,” he scoffed, wriggling out of her arms. “I can’t do it. You spoiled me. I’m not even good enough for me anymore.”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

“Aw, Ty,” she cooed, grasping his bicep gently. “Of course I’ll help. It just has to be quick, for some reason I feel like this isn’t the way we’re supposed to be doing this, and I need to get back to my room.”

Tyler nodded eagerly. “Yeah, that’s fine. Whatever. Just help me.”

She smiled softly and nodded her head in response, pondering over what the best way might be to accomplish her task. It had been longer than she could remember since the last time she’d done that for him, and was truthfully looking forward to it. She adored the way he felt in her hand, the way he appreciated so much something that was so simple.

Nicki inched behind him and wrapped her arms around him, reaching down with her right hand for her target. The moment she found it, a long, deep moan came from in front of her, echoing softly off of the four walls around them. Tyler’s entire body tensed up, and she used her other hand to rub soothing circles on his back.

“Just relax, babe,” she whispered, smiling as she felt his muscles unclench.

“Oh, I’m relaxed,” Tyler groaned, leaning back against her.

A soft “Good” was her response. Nicki moved her hand slowly at first, very aware of the way he liked things done. There was a brief moment of panic as footsteps approached the door from the hallway beyond them, but it turned out to be nothing. Tyler’s quiet noises provoked her, and she took them as a sign of gratitude. Nothing could compare to taking care of him, whether it was cooking him breakfast or helping him get his DNA into a plastic cup.

When he stopped squirming around in her arms, she assumed he was getting close.

“Got the cup?” she asked, knowing that it probably wasn’t the first thing on his mind at the moment.

“Mm, mhmm.”

Nicki squeaked out a small giggle, inspired by his dissolved ability to speak. It was nice to know that she could still provide the amount of pleasure necessary for him to become inarticulate. He had surely grown used to her, especially her hands, and she was lucky that he still enjoyed it. Otherwise, he could be doing what half of the men his age were doing, and looking for new territory in other places.

Tyler sighed and his body became slightly limp, still strong enough to hold itself up, but weak enough to put a good amount of his weight on Nicki.

“I missed,” he muttered.

“What?!”

She let him fall from her hand and bolted to his front side, praying that she had misunderstood. It was nerve wracking enough doing it once. But twice?

Once she faced him, she saw the transparent container in his hand.

“I was just screwin’ with ya,” he teased, goofy grin running rampant across his face.

“After all I do for you,” Nicki scolded, shaking her head at him. “You nearly gave me a stroke Ty. I have to get back to my room.”

As she turned to leave the room, a strong hand wrapped around her wrist and spun her back around, pulling her against a kind, firm chest. Lips touched the top of her head, and a warm chuckle rang through her ears.

“I’m sorry babe. Thanks for doing that. You know I love ya.”

“I don’t know if I believe that,” she countered, drawing away from him. “You’re gonna have to prove it.”

Nicki should have been expecting what came next, but he still managed to catch her off guard. With one hand, he gripped the back of her head and pulled her to his lips, engulfing her in a kiss worthy of only the most besotted of lovers. When he stopped, she was left breathless.

“I’m starting to believe you,” she said, hoping she might score another kiss like that out of the deal.

Instead, she received a chaste one, still filled with affection.

“You have to get back,” Tyler reminded her. “And don’t worry. You’ll believe me tomorrow morning.”

He sent a wink her way, causing her to become weak kneed and bashful. Nicki remembered quite perfectly how they had celebrated his last cup victory, and the bruises that had accompanied their merriment. They’d been so young then; their relationship was still fresh and unscathed. Little had she known back then, he already had her in his plans. She was sure that things hadn’t worked out the way he had pictured all those years ago, but if his behavior as of late was any inclination, he was okay with that.

After blowing him a kiss, Nicki raced out of the door and down the hallway which was, thankfully, still empty. As she approached the door to her room, her stomach dropped and her hands began to shake. Had she left the door open? Or had someone entered and realized that she wasn’t there? She gathered her courage and entered, and her footsteps caught the attention of a young man, not many years older than she.

“Mrs. Seguin? I’m Dr. Kozak. Jane’s asked me to do the procedure for her, she’s become a bit preoccupied with another client. Is that alright with you?”

She stared into his blue eyes, perfectly positioned on his handsome face. A silent prayer was said under her breath, hoping that Tyler wouldn’t decide to come and check on things. There was no doubt in her mind that he would not approve of her change in doctor, and she had the slightest inclination to believe he might want to pummel him. If he had a hard time keeping himself together while an old man worked with her private parts, he would surely be displeased by a young, chiseled one.

“Uh, yeah, that’s fine,” she said, hesitantly inching her way towards the examination chair.

The doctor slipped on a pair of gloves and adjusted a few pieces of his equipment as she made herself as comfortable as she could be on the plastic covered chair. He draped the customary sheet over her legs and she raised them into the braces, as she had many times the last year. Every time she did, she thought of her first appointment after seeing the pink positives on the pregnancy tests. All of the excitement and the hope that had flowed through her then, knowing the last of their dreams were finally coming true.

A gruff voice interrupted her reminiscence, and she couldn’t have been more grateful.

“This won’t hurt,” he assured her, “But it might take some time. Will it make you feel more at ease if we talk? Or would you rather me stay quiet? Either is perfectly fine.”

Nicki took a moment to figure out how to respond. No doctor had ever asked her that, and she gained mountains of respect for this one for doing so.

“I guess talking is fine.”

“Okay, good.” He paused, and she felt something as cold as ice between her legs. “I’ll admit, I’m an avid hockey fan. Your husband has always been one of my favorite players.”

As always, a smile crossed her face when he mentioned Tyler. Husband still sounded so foreign to her. He was her best friend. He was the man who kept her safe at night, and the one she adored waking up to every morning. He was the one person on the planet that she would willingly and happily do absolutely anything for. But, for some reason, the word husband never sounded quite right. It almost didn’t do him justice.

“Yeah, he’s always been one of mine, too.”

“Really? That’s something you don’t hear every day. I was under the assumption that athletes didn’t give fans the time of day, at least when it comes to dating. How did the two of you meet?”

“Well,” she began, remembering a long lost part of her life, “My best friend got us in to meet the team. That was about five years ago now. To be honest with you, I was totally star struck by most of them. But I felt completely comfortable around Tyler. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t easy convincing him I was worth his time.”

“But you obviously did.”

“Yeah, I guess I did.”

Silence filled the room for a moment and Nicki tried to ignore the strange, permeating feel of whatever tool the doctor was working with. It was one of the most unnatural feelings she’d ever experienced.

“How are you holding up?” Dr. Kozak asked, peering up over the sheet across her legs.

“I’m doing okay. It’s just kind of… weird.”

“Would you like me to explain what I’m doing? I know it probably seems strange from your perspective.”

Nicki nodded her head, feeling more than a little awkward when they made eye contact. She’d never had a doctor so personable, and she couldn’t figure out if it was making her feel at ease or uncomfortable.

She listened intently as he explained the process, and rode out a couple of emotional highs and lows throughout. On one hand, as long as they were both fertile still, this was the foolproof way of getting what she wanted. But, on the other, for the next nine months she would have to watch while someone else carried the most precious thing she would ever have.

The whole time, Dr. Kozak talked her through it. It seemed as though she had been in there for hours when he finally told her that she was all set and left her to change back into her clothes. Nicki dressed herself in a hurry, knowing that Tyler wanted as much time to relax as he could muster before he had to be at the Garden. She pushed through the door back to the lobby, where he was standing, waiting for her.

“You ready to get outta here?” he asked, slipping his hands onto her waist.

Nicki shivered from the feel of his loving hands on her body.

“Yeah, we don’t need to talk to Jane before we go?” she inquired, looking directly up into his soft eyes.

“Already did. She’s gonna call us when the results are in. You got blood taken, right?”

She nodded, entranced by the way he was looking at her. As hard as she tried, she couldn’t figure out what was behind his expression. She whittled it down to him being nervous about his game that night and excited about taking the next step in their lives. It was a confusing mix of emotions, for sure, and she wished that there was something she could do to make things simpler for him.

Tyler let one of his hands fall and inched the other around to the small of her back, guiding her out of the lobby and towards the main exit of the hospital. His lack of conversation worried her slightly, but it didn’t seem like anything that couldn’t be fixed by a beer, some lunch, and a pregame massage.

He opened the passenger door of his car for her, and before sliding into the seat, Nicki wrapped her arms snugly around his waist, pressing her head firmly against his chest. She had taken him by surprise and he backed up at first, before pulling her closer.

“I love you Ty,” she murmured into his shirt. “Whatever happens tonight, you know you’ll always have me.”

His large hand rubbed a few comforting circles across her back, forcing a long sigh from her lungs.

“Yeah, I know.”

It was obvious by his tone of voice that her attempt at dissolving his nerves hadn’t been successful. There was nothing she could do nor say that could take the pressure off of his shoulders, but God help her if she wasn’t going to try.

After placing a lengthy kiss in the center of his chest, Nicki ducked into the car and watched through the mirrors as he strode around the length of it to the driver’s side. She didn’t waste a minute’s time once he got in, making a grab for his hand and pulling it into her lap. When his face lit up just the slightest bit, she could feel the butterflies fluttering around in her stomach. The entire ride home she occupied herself with his right hand, stroking a finger over each raised vein, over each bumpy knuckle, and across his calloused palm. When she grew bored of that, she entertained herself by strategically placing a kiss on every inch of his hand, up to the middle of his forearm.

“Where’s all this coming from?” he asked, taking his eyes off of the road for a second to glance at her.

“I just love you, Ty. I’m nervous for you. I don’t know what else to do with myself.”

“Well, I’m not complaining,” he said, smirking as he pulled into their long driveway, coming to a stop just before the front steps. “Why don’t you go in and let out Marshall? I’ll be right there.”

She shrugged her shoulders and hopped out of the car, taking the four front stairs two at a time. After typing in the pass code on their recently installed security system, she heard the door unbolt and was greeted with the cool flow of central air as she stepped into the foyer. Marshall came galloping into the room at high speed, unable to stop before bumping into her and knocking her backwards.

“Hi buddy!” she squealed, enthralled by how happy he was to see her. “You need to go out?!”

Marshall jumped into the air and then took off down the hallway towards the back door. Nicki followed slowly, suddenly overcome by a bout of dizziness. She leaned against the walls for support, eagerly awaiting Tyler’s entrance so that he could help her. Miraculously, she made it to the door in the kitchen and opened it for Marshall to sprint out.

Just as she closed it, she stumbled backwards and anticipated what was sure to be an incredibly painful fall. She felt as though she was falling in slow motion and attempted to brace herself for the impact, but found herself safely caught in Tyler’s arms.

“Babe what the hell?”

He helped her straighten out before gingerly lifting her off of the ground and bringing her to the couch, where she sprawled out and stared up at the ceiling, trying to regain her composure.

“What happened?” he asked, sounding more frightened than he had a moment ago.

“I… I don’t know,” she muttered, covering her forehead with her hand. “I just got really dizzy out of nowhere.”

Tyler replaced her hand with his, feeling for a temperature.

“You don’t feel warm. Have you had any water today?”

She shook her head and stared at him. She was so grateful for his solid, logical reasoning. When something was wrong, all he cared about was locating the problem and fixing it. Luckily, when it concerned her health, he was normally well informed. He’d had his share of illnesses and injuries, and had an extensive knowledge of how to cure everyday ailments.

His soft lips pressed against her forehead, forcing her eyes to flicker shut. When he got off of the couch, she opened them again.

“I’m gonna get you some water and Tylenol, okay? Stay still,” he ordered.

“Thanks, love.”

He flashed a small smile her way before walking through the archway into the kitchen. She lost sight of him, but could hear the door opening and Marshall’s claws scratching up their beautiful hardwood floors. Marshall didn’t hesitate to launch himself onto the couch with her, dropping his head into her lap the same way he’d done the very first time they met. Nicki had developed a bond with him stronger than she had with any of her other pets, mostly because she was the only company he had while Tyler was on the road.

“You’re a good boy,” she whispered, scratching his head between his ears.

She laughed at his thumping leg, and scratched harder so that he would thump harder.

“You two are so cute,” Tyler said, grinning from the archway.

“Not as cute as you.” He glared at her, making her giggle even harder. “It’s a compliment hon, take it.”

He made a gruff noise and approached her, taking a seat beside her on the couch before handing her a tall glass of water and two pills. Nicki could feel him watching her as she threw her head back to choke down the Tylenol, and stayed until she finished the entire glass of water. Tyler took it from her and set it down on the coffee table in front of them.

“Don’t you be scaring me like that,” he said caringly, scooting behind her and wrapping her up in his arms. “What if I hadn’t come in when I did? Or what if that happened when I was on the road?”

“I don’t know,” she responded, feeling ashamed for not taking care of herself. “I didn’t think of that.”

“Just promise me you’ll be careful when I’m not here. You’ve been forgetful lately.”

“I promise,” she said, nearly purring as he ran his fingers delicately through her hair. “I know I have. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, I’m just worried about you. It’s bad enough when I have to leave you alone, I can’t stand the thought of you falling or getting sick with no one around to help.”

Nicki snuggled up to him, burying her face in her usual spot. “Well you don’t have to worry about that for now. After tonight, you have the whole summer to take care of me.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing,” he said, placing a gentle kiss on the top of her head.

At that, she decided to give up and sink as far into him as she could. The dizziness subsided the second she laid down, but she figured it wouldn’t kill either of them to stay on the couch and relax. She reached over Marshall for the remote and turned on the TV, which was naturally on NHL network. A group of men sat around a desk, discussing every minute detail of the game that was going to take place that night. When Tyler’s picture came onto the screen behind them, Nicki snatched the remote from him and changed the channel. Tyler tensed up and shifted behind her.

“You didn’t have to change that.”

She turned her head up to look at him. “Ty, you don’t need to see all of that. You need to focus on you.”

He stayed silent and moved around some more, pulling her closer to his body. She sighed and propped herself up on her knees so that her face was just inches from his. Her hand raised to cup his reddened cheek, and she couldn’t stop smiling as his eyes closed and he leaned into her hand.

“You hungry baby?” she asked, rubbing her thumb across his soft skin.

“Mmmm,” he moaned, eyes still closed. They opened slowly, as if he was just waking up. “Starving, actually.”

“Want your usual?”

His head turned to kiss the center of her palm, making a quiet mew escape her lips. The sensation was almost too much to bear.

“You’re the greatest,” he whispered, leaving a few more small pecks on her flesh.

“I won’t argue with that,” she giggled, pushing herself off of the couch.

As soon as she got up, the dizziness returned full force. In seconds, Tyler was standing behind her, holding her up.

“I think we should call someone,” Tyler suggested, pulling her gently back onto the couch and into his lap.

Nicki held her head in her hands, trying to bring the spinning to an end. “Just… just give me a sec.”

“Babe, I can’t play a game tonight when I’m worrying about you. How long has this been going on?”

She picked through her memories, trying to pinpoint the first time it happened.

“I think a few days ago?”

“Why didn’t you say anything then?” he prodded, obviously concerned.

“It didn’t seem like a big deal,” she mumbled, shrugging her shoulders.

Tyler let out a frustrated sigh and adjusted her on his knees. “You gotta tell me when shit like this happens.”

She hung her head and whispered, “I’m sorry Ty.”

“You don’t have to apologize. Just do me a favor?”

“Anything.”

“Stay in the player’s box tonight, will ya? They’ve got a trainer in there for Dougie. If anything happens, he’ll be right there.”

“Tyler, that’s completely – “

A rough hand gripped her face, holding it up by her chin. “Please, do this for me. I can’t function out there if I’m worrying about you.”

“Okay. Alright. Is that even legal?”

Tyler chuckled a bit, most likely more out of relief than humor.

“I’ll talk to Chiarelli. I doubt it will bother him during game seven of the cup finals.”

“I don’t know how to get up there.”

“Would you stop being so difficult?” he teased, pressing his lips to her cheek. “I’ll walk you up there before the game starts.”

Nicki nodded slowly, realizing that it was horrible of her to be challenging him when he needed her support the most.

“Okay love. I’m gonna start the oven,” she said, attempting to push herself off of his lap.

His arms tightened around her, restricting any movement.

“Ty!” she squeaked, suffocating from his grasp. “I can’t breathe!”

“Sorry.” He loosened his hold on her, but still showed no signs of letting her go. “I can make it myself.”

“But it’s game day,” Nicki whined, leaning her head against his. “Why don’t we do it together? I’ll make the salmon, you can hold me up.”

A light hearted laugh told her that she’d won him over, and soon enough they were both on their feet heading into the kitchen. After setting the oven to broil, Nicki opened the fridge and pulled out the long cut of salmon she’d bought the day before. It had become his pregame ritual, and salmon was the one food he couldn’t go without.

“It’s not the same when I try to make it,” Tyler said, leaving a trail of short kisses down her neck and shoulder.

“That’s because you’re so used to grilling, you forgot how to use the oven.”

“Eh, maybe you’re right on that one,” he admitted, chuckling softly into her ear.

His laugh was unbearable. It was bad enough when he laughed in general. When he laughed at something she said or did, she swooned uncontrollably. When he laughed in her ear – forget about it.

With the salmon placed underneath the broiler, they had ten minutes to spare. Tyler slid his hands underneath her shirt, caressing her skin in a way that made her gut churn. How his huge, sometimes clumsy hands could be so graceful and tender would remain a mystery to her for as long as she lived. Nicki moaned, tilting her head back onto his shoulder in a very familiar act. As expected, his tongue grazed her neck, the trail broken up by soft kisses.

“What are you trying to do, Ty? We both know this is horrifically bad timing.”

“Just warming you up for later,” he whispered, his hot breath and sweet lips brushing against her ear.

She wanted to remind him that later there was a possibility that he would be in no mood to be doing anything, but thought better of it. If his confidence was soaring, hell, she was going to let it fly. There were few worse things than watching him go into a game with self doubt.

“Can’t wait,” she purred, rubbing her cheek against his.

Something she had done sparked a reaction from him, as his arms were suddenly wrapped completely around her body, and his face was buried deep in the crook of her neck.

“And I can’t wait to shave this God damned squirrel off of my face. It ruins everything.”

Nicki laughed and spun herself around in his arms, so that when she tilted her head to look at him, her nose pressed against the bottom of his chin.

“Oh, it ruins everything Ty?”

He nodded and pouted his lips, making her laugh harder.

“You’re adorable when you whine,” she teased, “Especially about your pube beard.”

“I am not adorable. And they are not pubes,” he snapped.

From the way he said it, Nicki knew that he was fooling around with her. If only his joyfulness could last the remainder of the day, he would have no problem going out on the ice later and playing his best hockey. The better his mood, the better he played. And Nicki intended on making sure he was in the best mood he could possibly be in.

“Whatever you say, sweetheart.”

Tyler grinned, probably trying to come up with something clever in his head to shoot back at her. While he was lost in thought, she pulled his face down to her level and showered his exposed cheeks with dozens of tiny kisses.

“Just can’t keep those lips off of me today, huh?” he taunted, growing cockier by the second. “Must be the aura of the next Stanley Cup champion.”

“I bet that’s what it is, babe,” she said, stroking his biceps and going along with the game he was playing. “I’m looking forward to cheering you on tonight. Even if I can’t scream in the player’s box.”

“Yeah, don’t wanna scare Dougie more than he already is,” Tyler chuckled. “In all seriousness, I don’t know how I could play if I didn’t have you rooting for me, even when I’m on the road. Something about looking around that locker room and knowing that out of all the guys in there, I’m the one with the most incredible support system, it gets me really amped up. No one else’s family cares as much as you do.”

“I don’t know how true that is, but if you feel that way it’s good enough for me,” she said, exchanging glances with the beautiful mess of a man who stood in front of her. In all honesty, she couldn’t wait until the beard was gone, either. She liked him much better clean cut, without reddish, scraggly hairs covering his flawless face.

In one swift motion, his hand reached around the back of her neck and the beard she’d just been staring at was scraping against her sensitive skin, forming a rash the instant it hit her. Nicki could have cared less, completely consumed by his gentle kiss. He pulled away much too soon, but she didn’t dare ask for more. He’d put her on edge, and normally when she was on edge, he was too. She allowed him to preserve what was left of their self control, and did her best not to tackle him onto the floor and take advantage of him.

“I know that look,” he said, grinning gloriously.

“What look?” Nicki asked, as if she didn’t already know what he was talking about.

“The you want it, but you know you can’t have it look. C’mon babe, you’ve been giving me that look for five years now. I know it when I see it.”

She shrugged and gave in to the temptation of his slightly opened arms, falling into his body and letting him hold all of her weight.

“It was an emotional morning. When things get emotional, we have sex. To be honest, it’s really weird not being able to,” she admitted, looking up at him.

Tyler glanced over her and at the clock on the microwave, blowing out a long breathe before he responded.

“Can you wait ten hours and sixteen minutes… ish?”

Nicki giggled and broke away from him to remove the salmon from the oven. Sliding the oven mitts onto her hands, she grasped each end of the pan and set it quickly on the granite countertop to cool. Before she could even get the mitts off, Tyler’s arms had snaked around her waist again.

“I knew I made the right call marrying you,” he said, squeezing her tightly.

“Why do I feel like you only say that when I cook for you?” she quipped, brushing her fingertips along the lines of his tattoo.

They stayed that way while the salmon cooled in front of them. Nicki was so perfectly at home with his arms around her stomach and her back against his chest. When he loosened his hold, she instantly began to feel disappointed. There was an inkling of fear in the back of her mind that tonight wouldn’t go the way Tyler expected it to. It could have just been her nerves kicking in, or her habit of anticipating the worst. The only thing that could make her feel better about it was being wrapped up in his embrace.

His hands made an unforeseen pit stop around her collarbone, feeling the chain of the sapphire stone that hung from her neck. She was about to ask what he was doing when they moved to the back of her neck, unclasping the necklace, forcing it to fall down her shirt.

Nicki reached for it, but Tyler pressed her hand against her chest, keeping her from moving it.

“I’ll get it,” he assured her. “Just give me one second.”

He had officially confused her. She wanted to ask him what he was doing, but had learned over the years that it was best to just let him do whatever he was going to do, and go along with it. His fingertips danced across her skin, causing her to slowly sink further into his body. When she felt something cold in the middle of her chest, she was snapped back to reality.

A single glance down at the pink, sparkling stone that was now resting comfortably below her collarbone put her on the verge of tears. Nicki spun around quickly, nearly knocking the pan that held Tyler’s salmon off of the counter. He skillfully caught it in his palm and pushed it back to the granite while laughing at her clumsiness. A few giggles escaped in time with the droplets falling down her cheeks.

“Ty, what’s this for?” she asked, holding the beautiful rose colored jewelry tightly in her closed fist.

“I told you I was going to do it,” he explained flatly.

“But… I didn’t believe you.”

Tyler smiled at her and plunged his hand into her shirt in search of her previous necklace, wearing a proud expression on his face when he fished it out.

“Do you like it?”

Nicki unclenched her fist and peered at the newest addition to her collection of necklaces.

“It’s beautiful,” she whispered, entranced by the way the recess lighting in their kitchen made it sparkle and shine as she moved it around in her palm.

Warm lips pressed against her forehead as she examined the gift.

“It’s nice being able to buy things for you now,” Tyler teased.

She glared at him, wishing that she had it in her to throw the necklace at him and demand he take it back to the store. This was surely only the beginning of a long string of impromptu and unnecessary presents, and she could think of a hundred things off of the top of her head that would be a better use of money. But between the sentimentality of receiving her favorite pieces of jewelry from him and the meanness it would take to deny him the pleasure of her appreciation, she kept quiet and didn’t refuse him.

“Tyler, I love it,” she started, placing her hands on either side of his long, shapely neck. “But please don’t make this a thing. I don’t need any of this, and it’s not like I can give you anything in return.”

“You could if you wanted to.”

Nicki laughed a bit and shook her head. “I’m not buying you stuff with [i]your[/i] money.”

His hands found their way into her hair, enveloping her in a sensation that she could never get enough of. It ran like silk through his fingers, and his touch on her scalp sent shivers through her entire body.

“I don’t want you to think I’m pressuring you, because that’s the last thing I’m doing,” he said hesitantly, gazing directly into her eyes. “But have you given any more thought to the interior design?” He paused, waiting for her answer. When she took too long to respond, he started speaking again. “I just think we’re finally comfortable in the house, we have all this space for you to work with, a nice office… and what if the adoption or the surrogacy takes a while? If I didn’t have hockey, the wait would kill me. I don’t want to see you going stir crazy or anything.”

She cocked her head, caught completely off guard by his inquiries.

“No, I haven’t really thought about it, not until right now at least.”

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have even brought it up,” he murmured regretfully, rubbing a thumb against her still wet cheek.

“Ty, no, don’t be sorry. I… I think you’re right. I’ve put it off for an entire year now.”

Tyler squeezed her face lightly, just enough to capture her undivided attention.

“Please don’t think I’m pushing you to do it. We don’t need the money. If you’re content doing whatever you do at home, keep doing it. I just want you to be happy.”

Nicki stood on her tip toes, puckering her lips in order to meet his. She left a few quick pecks to let him know that he hadn’t crossed the line the way he thought he had.

“I am happy. But you’re so right, babe. If there isn’t anyone for me to take care of, sooner or later I’m gonna get bored. I’ll call my old professor tomorrow, see what he can do to help me,” she said, thinking the plan through as she spoke. Tyler stayed silent, and she smiled up at him. “Thank you for looking out for me. It’s nice to know you’re thinking of me.”

He smiled back, giving her a show of his freshly whitened teeth. She’d forgotten he went to the dentist the day before, and couldn’t stop staring at his glowing smile, as if he needed to be any more attractive.

“I’m always thinking of you,” he muttered, glancing from her face down to the floor, like he was ashamed to admit it.

She curled a finger underneath his chin and tilted his head up, so that their eyes connected once again.

“It’s not just you, love,” she said, trying to ease his embarrassment. “You’re on my mind all day.”

Tyler stared at her for what felt like an eternity.

“That’s creepy.”

Nicki pushed him away from her, wearing the most shocked expression she could muster.

“You’re a prick. Eat your fucking salmon before I throw it at your face,” she threatened, unable to hold back the fit of laughter that was about to overtake her at the sight of his confused face.

“That’s it,” he snapped, moving quickly towards her. “You’re finished.”

** * * * *

“Hi Nicki!” Dougie shouted over his shoulder, the huge boot covering his entire leg keeping him from turning around to face her. “What are you doing up here?”

“She hasn’t been feeling so good, so I’m making her sit up here with you and Sal,” Tyler explained, leading her by the small of her back to the chair next to Dougie.

Nicki was about to sit down when Tyler grabbed her elbows, keeping her upright.

“If you feel sick at all, tell Sal right away. Promise me you won’t try to tough it out,” he begged, the worry plain in his voice. “Just for tonight. For me.”

She nodded fervently and slid her arms around his neck, briefly touching the tip of her nose to his before locking his lips in a passionate kiss.

When she pulled away she said softly, “Make me proud, baby.”

“I’ll try,” he responded, peeking through the glass and down to the ice. “I gotta get down there.”

Nicki nodded once more and gave him another kiss, shorter this time.

“I love you, no matter what happens,” she reminded him, grabbing his hand as he turned to leave. “Win or lose, tomorrow morning, you’ll still be my superman.”

He shot her a loving attempt at a smile before turning his back to her and walking through the doors, vanishing into the hallway.

“So what’s going on with you?” Dougie asked after she took her seat.

She shrugged and shifted so that she was facing him, cringing as she noticed just how much of a monstrosity his leg boot was. He’d broken it in four places, and had shattered his ankle. It was horrifying to watch, and Nicki was sure that it was something she would never fully recover from. She couldn’t imagine the effect it had on Dougie, or even his girlfriend for that matter. The memory of seeing Tyler lying motionless on the ice was still vivid in her brain, and drew fresh tears whenever she thought about it.

“I’ve been getting kinda dizzy lately. I don’t think it’s a big deal, but Ty’s acting like the world is ending.”

“After everything you’ve been through, he has every right to worry,” he said, covering his mouth with his hand shortly after. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to – “

Nicki chuckled and scooted her chair closer to him. He was the same age as she was, but he still had the innocence of a child. If she had to pick anyone on Tyler’s team to go befriend, it would have to be him. He had a personality that was worth getting to know, and she couldn’t help but to consider asking Tyler to invite him and his girlfriend over for dinner.

“Dougie, it’s fine. You should know by now that you and the team are just as much a family to us as our parents. I know I haven’t really been around much, but things are getting better. A lot better.”

He smiled at her before focusing his attention on the players, who were warming up and stretching out on the fresh ice.

“Good,” he said, still looking straight ahead. “He’s been acting better too. He had us worried for a while.”

She hung her head, suddenly feeling an oppressive amount of guilt. Not once had she considered what her emotional instability might be doing to his career.

“That’s my fault,” she mumbled.

“Hey, nothing was your fault,” Dougie said quickly, most likely terrified that she would begin to cry. “Bad stuff happens to good people all the time. Judging by that conversation you just had with him, I’d say the both of you are doing okay.”

“Yeah, we are. Thanks, Dougie.”

“No problem,” he answered enthusiastically, as if helping her feel better was the highlight of his day.

Moments later, the lights dimmed in the Garden, and Nicki braced herself for the team to come stampeding onto the ice. The music that shook her seat and blared through her head energized her, and the thrill of a game seven pumped through her blood. Always a hockey fan, she was familiar with the nerves of watching her favorite team battle their hearts out for the ultimate prize. However, she was still adjusting to the entirely new set of emotions that accompanied watching her husband, the love of her life, put everything he had into a sixty minute game that would determine his persona for the next three months. It was much more personal; it was so much more than bragging rights for a city and celebrations for the victory of a beloved team. That team was her family, and the Cup symbolized everything they dreamed of, everything they worked so hard for over the past three quarters of a year.

When Tyler’s name was announced, the crowd erupted in screams and applause. The TD Garden could be the most supportive atmosphere, or the most brutal. There had been plenty of occasions where Nicki found herself sobbing after horrible comments and boo’s were thrown Tyler’s way. It saddened her to think that not everyone could know him like she did, that what the fans saw was just a player, and nothing more. If they had even the slightest clue as to what an amazing human being he was, she was sure nary another boo would be called at him.

A loud sigh came from her left, and Nicki couldn’t help but feel awful for Dougie. It had been a breakout season for him; he was on his way to being named best scoring defenseman in the league. All of his success came to a screeching halt due to a bad hit at the wrong angle, and a pig pile at the worst possible moment. She felt sick as she replayed the disaster in her head, recalling the pure agony that washed over his precious baby face.

“This must be hard for you,” she concluded, hoping some conversation might help lighten his mood.

“Oh, it is. But it’s not just the game.”

Nicki furrowed her eyebrows and directed her vision straight at him.

“Something else bothering you?” Dougie looked shyly away from her, and she couldn’t decide whether it was best to leave it alone, or to press the issue. “You know you can tell me anything, hon. I know we aren’t best friends, but we’re both a part of the same family.” He was still quiet, and she felt the need to add, “You can trust me, Dougie.”

His eyes drooped down, looking sadder than she’d ever seen them. He was always so upbeat and optimistic, it was breaking her heart to see him so discouraged over something.

“Maggie’s pregnant,” he mumbled, never sparing her a glance.

“Are congratulations in order?” Nicki asked, unsure of how he felt about it.

“I… I don’t know. She told me yesterday, and we got in a huge fight. I haven’t talked to her since.”

Due to the recent speed bumps in her own relationship, she could empathize with his issues.

“I’m so sorry it went that way,” she said, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. It took some effort to reach, since he was more than a foot taller than her, but out of compassion, she managed to do it. “What caused the fight?”

She heard a soft sniffle, and hoped to God that he wasn’t crying. If he cried, she was going to cry.

“I want to marry her. And she doesn’t want to marry me.”

Nicki could feel the pain radiating from him. He was clearly head over heels in love with her, the whole team saw it whenever they were together, and when they were apart. From what she remembered, Maggie seemed to have been just as crazy about him. If not a bit reserved, she was a nice girl who always clung to his side.

“Did she say why?”

“She just kept saying over and over that marriage wasn’t what she wanted. And then I asked her what she wanted to do about the baby, and she got all sweet and said it was our baby and she was excited to be a mother and see me as a father and then got all pissed accusing me of not wanting to be a part of it. I’m just so confused. How could she think I don’t want to be a part of it if I asked her to marry me?”

She could feel her heart slowly breaking with every word Dougie said. He was more upset than she had ever seen him, and with good reason. Every time she encountered a problem with a friend’s relationship, she tried to think of it in terms of her own. What if that had happened between her and Tyler? How would she feel?

After drawing a few careful conclusions, Nicki pulled her chair the rest of the way towards him so that they were within inches of each other.

“I don’t know how correct any of this is going to be, but if you want I can give you my two cents,” she offered, leaning over the table in front of them to get a better look at him.

Dougie nodded and prepared himself to listen, even folding his hands in his lap like an attentive school child.

“Firstly, finding out your pregnant is almost comparable to a bomb. They all go off in different ways, just like every woman has a different experience finding out she’s carrying a baby. They can ruin people’s lives. But, they can also bring people together. I’m not very familiar with Maggie, but maybe she has some kind of issue with a commitment that big. Now, if you throw marriage, another huge commitment, into the mix, it can get really overwhelming.”

He shook his head, still unable to look at her.

“But look at you. We’re all the same age, and you’ve been married for a year and, sorry for the brutal honesty, should have a kid right now. And you and Segs are so happy together. I just, I want that. I don’t get why she doesn’t. What if she doesn’t love me enough?”

“Dougie, honey, like I just said. Everyone is different. My whole life, all I wanted was stability, and protection. So when Ty offered it to me on a silver platter, of course I accepted it with open arms. Maybe that kind of life isn’t what Maggie wants right now. It doesn’t mean that she doesn’t love you.”

“I’d feel so weird having a kid and not being married,” he said, sounding a little less upset than he had before.

“Personally, I would too,” she admitted. “But that also doesn’t make it not right. People are doing all kinds of things unconventionally now.”

“So what do I do?” he asked, finally meeting her eyes.

“My advice? Talk to her as soon as the game is over. I don’t care if you guys are the champs or if you aren’t, if you love her Dougie, she needs to be the single most important thing in your life. Tell her everything you told me, and explain to her why you feel that way. Calmly. And then ask her to explain her standpoint. Calmly. After you both get it off of your chest, you should be able to at least find some common ground.”

He sat still as stone next to her, and she guessed he was thinking over what he was going to say to Maggie.

“I really hope this goes well for you,” she said before moving her chair back to its original position and gazing down to the rink in search of her man.

** * * * *

“Fucking shit!”

“That was nowhere near a penalty! Jesus fucking Christ!”

Nicki had taken a spot more or less on top of Dougie, chewing on what used to be her well kempt fingernails and watching as Tyler threw a fit all the way to the penalty box.

“Fuck, Dougie,” she whimpered under her breath.

His strong hand gripped her shoulder, not unlike the way Tyler’s did.

“I know, just hang in there. Our penalty kill has been a brick the whole game.”

“Oh God I can’t watch.”

Dougie’s hand began to rub circles on her back, and she briefly wondered if the team traded techniques in the locker room. His attempts to comfort her mimicked Tyler’s perfectly; the only thing missing was the electricity that coursed through her from his touch.

“You gotta watch Nicki, for Segs. I know it sounds crazy, but we can tell when you’re watching. We just know. We might be the only two people in this place that don’t hate his guts right now.”

She felt her lower lip begin to tremble as the jumbotron picked up a shot of Tyler, defeated and exasperated in the penalty box. The jeers echoed throughout the huge building, and the camera stayed on him just long enough to pick up his reaction. It was then that she lost it, and began to sob uncontrollably.

“I hate this sport!” she shrieked, pulling at her hair roughly. “I fucking hate this sport!”

“Shhh,” he cooed, doing everything he could to calm her down. Unfortunately, none of it was working. “It’s gonna be fine. We want this. And we’re – “

Dougie was cut short by complete and utter silence. As the rambunctious crowd turned hushed and still, she could feel all of the blame shifting onto Tyler. That goal was deemed his fault. If they lost this game, the entire city would place the fault on his shoulders.

“I feel sick,” she murmured, wary of the impending dizziness that was creeping in on her weakened state.

As the final minute began to run out, Tyler flew from the penalty box, knocking one player down to the ice with nothing but his momentum. He intercepted the puck and, with a burst of speed, broke away towards the Red Wings net. If he could score, if he could [i]just[/i] score, they would have another chance in overtime, and a twenty minute break to regroup.

“Come on Ty!” Nicki screamed at the top of her lungs, pretending that he might actually be able to hear her.

She stood from her seat, holding her breath as he took a shot, with nothing but seven seconds left on the clock. A familiar ding rang through the arena, and as the final buzzer went off, she had to watch as Tyler stood stoically while his rivals celebrated on his own ice.

“Shit,” Dougie whispered, his hand falling from her back.

** * * * *

“Tyler!” Nicki called, trying to get his attention through the crowded hallway.

The players, media, and a few estranged family members were all gathered in the tight space in front of the locker room. The ambiance was thick with tension and disappointment, and the only thing on her mind was finding Tyler and attempting to make everything okay.

“Ty!” she shotued a little louder, growing concerned when he didn’t turn her way. She knew that he could hear her, as the people around him were all looking around to see where the commotion was coming from.

As a last resort, she pushed and shoved her way through the sea of unhappy faces, dreading the look that she was sure to find on Tyler’s. When she reached him, his back was still turned to her; he was facing away from all of the chatter that was going on behind him.

“Baby,” she said softly, placing a hand on his shoulder.

He jumped as she touched him, and she realized that she had startled him. He hadn’t heard her at all, he’d been completely lost in his own world of self loathing and blame. Tyler turned in her direction, but looked over her instead of at her.

“I have to get interviewed. Go home.”

“Tyler, we came together I can’t just – “

“Have Candace drop you off.”

Nicki muttered a crushed “Fine,” and sauntered away from him, back into the madness of the packed hallway. Her search for Candace began unsuccessfully, until she stopped crying and remembered that it was for these purposes that she had a cell phone. Instead of sending a text and having to wait for a reply, she dialed her number and waited as it rang.

“Hey sis, where are you?”

“The locker room hallway, I’m headed out towards the exit,” she explained, attempting to hide the crackling in her voice. “I need a ride.”

“The fuck did that shithead do now?!”

“He’s just upset,” Nicki said, defending him. “Can I meet you somewhere?”

“I’m parked in the player’s lot, I’m walking to my car now. Meet me there.”

“Okay, see you soon.”

Nicki tried her hardest to hold herself together as she speed walked out of the building and towards the parking lot. She’d been naive to think that he would want to see her after such a devastating loss. Just because it would have made her feel better, had their roles been reversed, didn’t imply that it would work for him.

She breathed a sigh of relief as Candace came into view, leaning against her sleek white Mercedes, which was her latest birthday gift from Brad. As soon as Candace noticed Nicki’s presence, she raced across the parking lot and threw her arms around her.

“What’s going on baby girl?”

“Nothing, I don’t know. He doesn’t want to talk to me.”

Candace broke away from her, but held her hand and led her to the passenger side of the car.

“And you’re upset because you thought once he saw you, his face would brighten up and everything would be okay.”

“How did you know that?” she asked, questioning how painfully obvious she could be at times.

“Because you love him, and because if you had lost that game, seeing him would make you feel better. Believe me, I just went through the same thing. I’m just not as sensitive as you are,” she teased, giving her another quick hug before leaving her side.

“So what do I do?” Nicki asked once they were on the highway.

“What do you usually do to cheer him up?”

“You don’t want to know.”

Candace let out a bellowing laugh and reached to play with the radio controls on her dashboard. Once she settled on a station, she reclined back into her chair and kicked up her speed.

“Alright. Well, at this point, you probably know my brother better than I do. But the Tyler I know would go nuts if he came home to you waiting for him, preferably with no clothes.”

“You really think that would work?”

“I don’t see any reason why it wouldn’t,” Candace said, taking the exit towards Nicki’s house. “Or… oh! Even better. Still got that present I gave you your first birthday with the fam?”

A warm smile crossed Nicki’s face as she pondered over how Tyler might react to coming home and finding her in that, and decided that was precisely what she was going to do.

** * * *

When Nicki heard Tyler’s heavy footsteps trudging up the stairs, she flung her bathrobe to the floor and rose from where she was seated on the bed, standing tall in her stiletto heels in the center of their room. She stopped breathing as the doorknob turned slowly, suddenly becoming nervous, wondering if she had done the right thing.

Tyler walked into the room with his head hung low, surrounded by an air of shame. It took him minutes to finally look up at her, and the look on his face was wholly unreadable.

“Hey,” she said, in the voice she always used to seduce him.

He didn’t even bother to give her a once over. There she stood, in nothing but a lace bra and panties with his name and number plastered on them, feeling like a total fool. Before her eyes brimmed with tears, she turned away from him so that he wouldn’t see. Not like he would be looking, anyways.

“Ty, I’m sorry,” she murmured, just loud enough for him to hear. She received no response. “Is there anything I can do?”

She took a deep breath and spun around, horrified by the face she saw when she did. Tyler’s bloodshot eyes stared straight through her, like she was invisible to him. He laid curled up in the middle of their bed, leaving no room for her to join him.

“Tyler – “

“I just want to be alone,” he snapped, closing his eyes so he wouldn’t have to see the pain he’d just caused her.

Nicki kicked off the heels that she had scoured for just for him and grabbed her bathrobe from the floor, slipping it over her shoulders and tying the silk sash hurriedly around her waist. She ran out of the room and raced down the stairs, as if the faster she ran, the quicker she could get away from the horrible feelings inside of her.

She ended up in the kitchen, frantically searching for something that could stop the heaves that were shaking her body. Something, anything to distract her. Being raised in the twenty-first century, Nicki found reprieve in her cell phone.

“Hello?”

“Krista? It’s Nicki.”

“Hi honey,” she said softly, giving Nicki the impression that the conditions at her house weren’t much brighter. “You doing okay?”

Instead of trying to be strong, she let out everything she was trying to desperately to hold in.

“No, I’m not. None of this is okay. I’m supposed to be able to help him and make him feel better, and he won’t even look at me, never mind talk to me. I have no idea what to do,” she sobbed, realizing that she’d become loud enough to wake up Marshall and beckon him into the kitchen.

“First of all, you need to try and calm down. I know how hard it is sweetie, I’ve been there before.”

“Is Andrew acting like this?” she asked, hoping that maybe she wasn’t the only one.

“Andrew deals with this in a very different way. Believe me, Nicki, when he was younger, he was the same way. I know how much it hurts, and I know how guilty you must be for feeling victimized when he’s the one who just lost that game. And it’s okay to feel that way,” Krista said, as if she was talking to her daughter rather than a fellow team wife.

“He said he wants to be alone.”

There was a short pause on the other line.

“That’s no good. But if he asked for it, then you have to give it to him. Do you need a place to stay?”

Nicki felt a whole new rush of pain at the thought of not being able to sleep in her own house, purely because Tyler was so sickened by her presence.

“We have plenty of space,” she mumbled, fighting back the lump forming in her throat. “Thank you for the offer, though.”

“My pleasure hon, you’re always welcome here. As far as Tyler goes, give him some space. I’ve known that kid a long time, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen him as emotional as he’s been the past few months. I know he always goes home after the season ends, and I don’t think it would be a terrible idea to drag his ass up there for a week or so, get him away from all of the bad energy going on in this city.”

“Okay, I think I will. You know what? I’m going to get the tickets right now. Krista, I can’t thank you enough. I feel so much better.”

“No need to thank me, we all go through this at some point. It comes with the territory. Never hesitate to call, okay?”

“Will do,” Nicki said as she took her phone from her ear.

Within five seconds, she was on it again.

“Did it work?”

“No, Candace, it didn’t. That’s why I’m calling. I’m about to book us two tickets to Toronto, you feel like going home for a few days?”

She heard a loud sigh, and wondered what was going on on the other end of the phone call.

“Well, since Brad’s already on a plane to his parents’, I don’t have anything better to do.”

After working out some minute details, Nicki said goodbye to Candace, and told her to be at the house the next morning at eight o’clock sharp.

It dawned on her that if she expected Tyler to be boarding a plane at ten tomorrow morning, she would need to warn him and give him time to pack. Since it was already past one, she doubted he would be waking up with the sunrise.

As much as it hurt her to do so, she began her slow ascent up the stairs and crept down the hallway to their bedroom, terrified of what volatile state he might be in. She turned the doorknob and pushed carefully, not wanting to scare him or catch him off guard.

Tyler was rolled up in the same position he’d been in when Nicki last saw him, except his intense snores were ricocheting off the walls. He looked soft and gentle, the way he always did when he slept. He resembled nothing of the man who had just sent her running away in tears.

Nicki opted to avoid waking him up and pack a bag for him, and she tip toed into the closet in pursuit of his travel bag. She threw random garments in no organized fashion into the bag, feeling the exhaustion from a long, emotional day. It didn’t matter much what clothing he would have, as she imagined his mood would be much too sour to even care. She didn’t dare let herself think that the fresh air of his hometown could be uplifting. It was going to take much more than that.

She zippered his Bruins duffel bag, which was now stuffed with things he might need if they decided to stay longer than a few days. Nicki decided that she would wake up early to take care of her packing, although she didn’t see herself sleeping much that night anyhow.

Before leaving Tyler alone, she grabbed her phone charger from the wall behind her nightstand, her eye catching the notepad and pen that she left sitting out. It sparked an idea in her head, one that was worth giving a shot. It took her five minutes to gather the bravery to pick up the pen.

Tyler, I know you don’t want to talk to me right now, and you probably don’t really want to be around me, either. We don’t have to talk about what happened tonight. It never has to come up again if you don’t want it to. If you see this in the middle of the night, we’re going to Brampton tomorrow morning. I already bought the tickets and packed your bag. I’ll wake you up at eight. Candace is coming, too. My dad will look after Marshall. Listen babe, I don’t care about what happened out there. You are no less of a man to me than you were this morning. I love you just as much as I did before the game, and I’ll love you even more when I wake up tomorrow morning. Sweet dreams, love.

Nicki tucked the note into his half closed hand and left a gentle kiss on the side of his head. It killed her to leave him there, alone and upset, but if it was what he wanted, then it was what she would do. She flicked the light off and closed the door behind her, making her way down the stairs again. It would have made sense to sleep in one of the guest rooms, so that she would have a comfortable bed to toss and turn in. But the comfort and coziness of the living room was too grand to pass up, especially in a time of great need for such things.

She collapsed onto the couch and pulled a stray blanket over her, bracing herself for the long night ahead.