Caught Between Love
Chapter 14
You know when you wake up after an intense night of drinking, it feels like your head got ran over my a semi?
Welcome to my morning.
I stumble down to the kitchen, my head throbbing to see Max and James sitting at the breakfast bar.
"What's good this morning?" I ask.
"Cereal." They both say in sync, a fit of laughter soon followed. I grabbed the frosted flakes, took a handful and shoved them into my mouth.
"Attractive." Max chimes.
"To think I dated that for 5 months..." James retorts.
"Don't act like it didn't turn you on, Nealer." He smiled and spooned another helping of cereal. He tilted the bowl to his mouth, drinking the sugary milk that was left over.
"It still turns me on." He whispered as he walked past me to the sink. I rolled my eyes.
"Well ladies," he looked at both of us. "While I wish I could stay in the company of such beauty, I have to go workout." He hugged Max. "Tess. Last night, thanks. It was fun." He winked at me before leaving.
"The hell was that? You hugging?"
"We talked this morning. It's no big deal." Max shrugged. "He's still crazy about you, Tess."
"Stop it." I mutter. "I have errands to run, people to meet, things to do. I don't need whatever James Neal said last night to hover over me while I try to have a decent day today."
"What do you have planned?" She was curious at my sudden optimism.
"Lunch with a friend." I grabbed another handful of cereal.
"Sid."
"How'd you know?" I stuttered.
"James said he was back in town. You know, I'm happy the guys are back. Maybe you can finally move on. Things could be like old times." She seemed so hopeful.
"Things could never be like old times. James would never trust me and lets face it, Sid probably wants to tell me to stay the fuck away."
"There's that lovely pessimism I've missed." Max and her sarcasm.
***
I haven't been to Market Square in weeks, this place was always packed no matter when you came. I was running late meeting with Sid but I knew where he'd want to eat lunch - Diamond Market.
I saw him at a table alone, two drinks already ordered. He was hiding under a black hat but that didn't stop people from snapping photos.
"Hey." Breathless, heaving almost. Sid is always on time, one thing that annoys me. Is it s bad to be late for something justoncein your life?
"Tess. Hey!" He stood up pulling me in for a hug, no worries as to who was watching. Over his shoulder I saw two girls with their mouths gaped open. "A little late, eh? I should be used to this." He laughed.
Sid pulled out my chair for me and pointed for the waitress to come over. "The usual?" He asked and I nodded. "She'll have the black bean burger and I'll have the steakhouse burger. Thanks." The waitress gawked at Sid.She must be new. I thought.
"So how have you been?" Sid takes a sip of his water, his eyes focused on me.
"I've been better. You?" He shrugged.
"Not playing too well, huh?" My eyebrows raised in curiosity. "I was at the game. I've never seen you get subbed out."
Fantastic. My worst game ever and he was there to witness it.
"Go alone?"
"A couple of the guys came early so we all went." Was James with them? Did James see me play? Is that how he knew I'd be at Diesel? Jesus.
"Great." My face heats up. Embarrassment is no fun.
"Everybody has those games. You'll bounce back, you always do." He winked at me, his smile a little crooked from the new teeth he got over the summer.
We spent the next 10 minutes just staring at each other, seeing who would break with a smile or laugh first. It was always me. I could never keep a straight face, Sid broke me every time. The waitress brings out our food before politely asking Sid to sign a napkin.What a noob.
Lunch went by quick and Sid was watching me finish off my sweet potato fries.
"I'm sorry if you felt I abandoned you...." He starts. It rattled me, I wasn't expecting this lunch to turn into a confession. I just looked at him.
"I wasn't the greatest friend back there," He referred to that day he just left Halifax. Without one word. He was just gone. "With everything that happened, all the feelings that surfaced, I needed to get away. I figured you'd want space."
Words failed me.
"I should have stayed. I'm sorry, Tess." Our eyes broke contact as he played with his thumbs under the table.
"Sid." He looked up. "I'm a mess. I let the past hinder me, for some reason I thought James would never find out about us but I...I..." Tears were collecting quickly. I tried my hardest to not let them fall.
"You love him. I get it." He sighed. "I'm the one that broke our promise. I acted like a dick, I changed once you started dating him. It was because of me, you couldn't be honest with Nealer. I'm so fucking sorry."
He looked torn. He was pleading for forgiveness, his eyes were sunken. I've never seen Sid this way before, it scared me. It broke my heart.
"No one has the right to be sorry for himself for a misfortune that strikes everyone..." Marcus Tullius Cicero said that and boy is it true. We have no right to feel sorry for ourselves.
"Play fair. Don't hit people. Say sorry when you hurt somebody." Sid's eyes appear from under his hat. It was in that moment we both knew things would never be the same between us.
Welcome to my morning.
I stumble down to the kitchen, my head throbbing to see Max and James sitting at the breakfast bar.
"What's good this morning?" I ask.
"Cereal." They both say in sync, a fit of laughter soon followed. I grabbed the frosted flakes, took a handful and shoved them into my mouth.
"Attractive." Max chimes.
"To think I dated that for 5 months..." James retorts.
"Don't act like it didn't turn you on, Nealer." He smiled and spooned another helping of cereal. He tilted the bowl to his mouth, drinking the sugary milk that was left over.
"It still turns me on." He whispered as he walked past me to the sink. I rolled my eyes.
"Well ladies," he looked at both of us. "While I wish I could stay in the company of such beauty, I have to go workout." He hugged Max. "Tess. Last night, thanks. It was fun." He winked at me before leaving.
"The hell was that? You hugging?"
"We talked this morning. It's no big deal." Max shrugged. "He's still crazy about you, Tess."
"Stop it." I mutter. "I have errands to run, people to meet, things to do. I don't need whatever James Neal said last night to hover over me while I try to have a decent day today."
"What do you have planned?" She was curious at my sudden optimism.
"Lunch with a friend." I grabbed another handful of cereal.
"Sid."
"How'd you know?" I stuttered.
"James said he was back in town. You know, I'm happy the guys are back. Maybe you can finally move on. Things could be like old times." She seemed so hopeful.
"Things could never be like old times. James would never trust me and lets face it, Sid probably wants to tell me to stay the fuck away."
"There's that lovely pessimism I've missed." Max and her sarcasm.
***
I haven't been to Market Square in weeks, this place was always packed no matter when you came. I was running late meeting with Sid but I knew where he'd want to eat lunch - Diamond Market.
I saw him at a table alone, two drinks already ordered. He was hiding under a black hat but that didn't stop people from snapping photos.
"Hey." Breathless, heaving almost. Sid is always on time, one thing that annoys me. Is it s bad to be late for something justoncein your life?
"Tess. Hey!" He stood up pulling me in for a hug, no worries as to who was watching. Over his shoulder I saw two girls with their mouths gaped open. "A little late, eh? I should be used to this." He laughed.
Sid pulled out my chair for me and pointed for the waitress to come over. "The usual?" He asked and I nodded. "She'll have the black bean burger and I'll have the steakhouse burger. Thanks." The waitress gawked at Sid.She must be new. I thought.
"So how have you been?" Sid takes a sip of his water, his eyes focused on me.
"I've been better. You?" He shrugged.
"Not playing too well, huh?" My eyebrows raised in curiosity. "I was at the game. I've never seen you get subbed out."
Fantastic. My worst game ever and he was there to witness it.
"Go alone?"
"A couple of the guys came early so we all went." Was James with them? Did James see me play? Is that how he knew I'd be at Diesel? Jesus.
"Great." My face heats up. Embarrassment is no fun.
"Everybody has those games. You'll bounce back, you always do." He winked at me, his smile a little crooked from the new teeth he got over the summer.
We spent the next 10 minutes just staring at each other, seeing who would break with a smile or laugh first. It was always me. I could never keep a straight face, Sid broke me every time. The waitress brings out our food before politely asking Sid to sign a napkin.What a noob.
Lunch went by quick and Sid was watching me finish off my sweet potato fries.
"I'm sorry if you felt I abandoned you...." He starts. It rattled me, I wasn't expecting this lunch to turn into a confession. I just looked at him.
"I wasn't the greatest friend back there," He referred to that day he just left Halifax. Without one word. He was just gone. "With everything that happened, all the feelings that surfaced, I needed to get away. I figured you'd want space."
Words failed me.
"I should have stayed. I'm sorry, Tess." Our eyes broke contact as he played with his thumbs under the table.
"Sid." He looked up. "I'm a mess. I let the past hinder me, for some reason I thought James would never find out about us but I...I..." Tears were collecting quickly. I tried my hardest to not let them fall.
"You love him. I get it." He sighed. "I'm the one that broke our promise. I acted like a dick, I changed once you started dating him. It was because of me, you couldn't be honest with Nealer. I'm so fucking sorry."
He looked torn. He was pleading for forgiveness, his eyes were sunken. I've never seen Sid this way before, it scared me. It broke my heart.
"No one has the right to be sorry for himself for a misfortune that strikes everyone..." Marcus Tullius Cicero said that and boy is it true. We have no right to feel sorry for ourselves.
"Play fair. Don't hit people. Say sorry when you hurt somebody." Sid's eyes appear from under his hat. It was in that moment we both knew things would never be the same between us.
Aghh I need an update! This is great!
2/3/21