“Give your all to me, I’ll give my all to you. You’re my end and my beginning, even when I lose, I’m winning ‘cause I give you all of me…”


The nights wore on but Marco was finally on his way home. The road trip had been taxing on the both of him. While he was physically exhausted, Marie was emotionally so. After fighting with her mom and leaving in such a rush, she just wanted to collapse in Marco’s arms and have him make everything okay.

Around midnight, Sofia began to cry because she needed to be changed. Most nights, she could get through it without waking up, but not tonight. Marie secured a new diaper around her, blinking to keep her heavy-lidded eyes open. The past few hours had been spent crying. She didn’t even really know why. But between thinking about the wedding, and the family drama, and the future, plus a mix of a little PMS, she was a disaster.

Just as she shut the nursery door behind her, the front door opened up and Marco sneaked in. He was trying his best to stay quiet, but she ambushed him. She flung herself at him, wrapping her arms around his body, which forced him to drop his duffle bag. In an instant, she lost it completely and more tears poured from her eyes.

Marco wrapped his arms around her tightly and rubbed her back soothingly, “what’s wrong? Is everything alright?”

She nodded and sniffled, “I missed you.”

He did his best to hold back a grin, sensing she really was going through something serious. He pressed his lips to the top of her head and began shuffling her further into the house, “I’m here now. Everything’s going to be okay.”

Marie looked up at him and he bent lower to kiss her lips. Gently, he swiped his thumbs beneath her eyes to dry her tears, and then lifted her in his arms and made off for the bedroom. Once in bed, Marco crawled over her, kissing up her body until he reached her neck. For whatever reason, it made her cry harder, and Marco leaned back.

“Did I hurt you?”

She covered her mouth and shook her head, whimpering out as she hooked her other hand over Marco’s shoulder. “Sorry. Keep going… please,”

He stared at her for a moment, hesitating before actually leaning in to kiss her neck again. And the moment she let out another sob, Marco bowed his head against her shoulder, “I can’t. If you cry, I feel like I’m hurting you… and I can’t.”

“I’m sorry. I’ll be quiet,”

“Tell me what’s bothering you,” he sighed out and rolled over beside her. With his arms around her, he dragged her closer to his body and set his forehead against hers.

“I told you I’d never seen real love,” her breath was shaky as she struggled to get the words out. “I was afraid to fall for you because every boy in my life always ended up hurting me…”

“Am I hurting you?”

Marie shook her head and placed her hand down on his cheek. “You know my scars too well, and you know where they come from, and now my mom tells me that the man who gave me the scars needs to be invited to our wedding. I don’t understand what kind of mother wants her daughter to suffer,”

Marco cradled her head against his chest, “you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.”

“He’s my father,” she wailed, sounding more like Sofia than an adult.

“That wasn’t your choice. You can’t blame yourself,”

“Why did he have to do that to me?!”

Marco stared at her, seeing her break into tiny pieces. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Marie, it’s not your fault,”

That night was a first for both of them. It was the first time Marie had ever cried her way through sex. And it was the first time Marco ever had sex with a crying woman. As he thrust into her as carefully as possible, another set of tears rolled down her cheeks and Marco cupped her head in his hands.

She looked up at him, holding onto his wrists, and tried to stifle herself because somewhere deep down she knew it wasn’t sexy. But the more she thought about it, the more upset she got. Marco took a deep breath in and kissed her unwaveringly.

“I’m sorry…” she whispered breathlessly. Each time Marco thrust into her a little bit harder, and she found it hard to catch her breath.

He smiled and kept his pace, mostly suppressing a throaty groan, because no matter how much he wanted her to be okay, he also couldn’t deny that it still felt good. “Shh…” he nibbled on her earlobe and moved his hands to her breasts, squeezing them gently. “I love you,”

Marie tilted her head back to reach his lips. They kissed slowly, only parting for a moment so Marco could lick his fingertips and drop his hand to her clit. She turned her head to the side and breathed out, squeezing her eyes shut. Marco grunted quietly in her ear and gave her long, slow thrusts, making sure every inch of him throbbed inside of her.

When they both came, Marie buried her face in the base of Marco’s neck and let out a quiet sob. He held her tightly and stroked her hair, resting his throbbing member inside of her as her body convulsed beneath him. He kissed her cheek and centered his lips on hers. Finally pulling out, he rolled off of her but still kept close.

“I don’t like when you cry,” he whispered, kissing her temple softly. “Especially during sex,”

“Please don’t let him come to the wedding.”

Marco nodded and pressed his hand to her stomach, “I won’t.” He kissed her again, lingering for just a moment before he rolled onto his back and brought her with him, resting her head against his chest.

---

Bloodshot eyes were the story of the next morning. Having gotten so few hours of sleep, there was no way to avoid them. Marie stared at herself in the mirror and pressed her fingertips to the bags beneath their eyes. Thankfully Marco had gone to Sofia’s side when she began to cry at six this morning. It had given Marie a couple more hours to try to get some sleep.

When she went to find them, they were in the kitchen; Marco at the table reading the paper with a cup and pot of tea in front of him, and Sof in her bouncer, hopping away. Marie cleared her throat and sat across from him, pouring herself some tea.

“Thank you for last night,” she murmured, cringing as the hot liquid touched her lips.

“You’re thanking me for sex? Am I really that good?” He smiled and set down the paper to look at her.

“I’m thanking you for being supportive, not to discount the sex or anything.”

Marco reached across the table and intertwined his fingers with hers, “I love you. I’m always in your corner no matter what,” after a quick smile, he looked down at the paper to distract himself. Seemingly unwilling to progress in any sort of fashion, he took his time sipping his tea.

“Spill it. You’re sweating like a sinner in church,”

He chuckled and ran his fingertips over the ceramic cup, “my mum wants us to have pre-marital counseling.” Judging by her reaction, Marco could tell his confession made her nervous, “it’s a very Catholic thing, and I assured my mother that counseling from within the church wouldn’t be our best option considering we already have a child…” he lost his breath and nearly choked. “I know you’re secular, but it means a lot to her… and it’s what my father would’ve wanted...”

“Okay,”

“It doesn’t have to be through the church, we can go anywhere…”

“Marco,” she smiled, taking another sip of her tea. Simultaneously, she looked over at Sofia. “It’s okay. I’ll do whatever you want. Set up a meeting, and I’ll be there,”

“It’s already set up. It’s Monday. I get back in town the night before and we’re scheduled for after my practice,”

This was the first Marie was ever hearing about his plans for pre-marital counseling, and he already had a date set up. It’s not that she was angry with him taking the reigns on this. It’s just that she wished she had seen it coming. Never once in their relationship had they so much as spoken about going to a third party to talk about the personal details of their lives together.

What would this person even ask? Would they dig up some hidden secret that would change the dynamics of their relationship? This was the sort of stuff that could split them apart.

So Marie worried about it pretty much endlessly for days. And when Monday rolled around, she tried to pretend like it wasn’t bothering her. Marco didn’t seem affected by it in the slightest, and so she questioned why she was harboring anxious feelings towards it. Maybe she just had more to hide.

The counselor’s waiting room was something right out of a 1950s family drama. Marie nearly expected the counselor to be closer to the grave than life, but when she came waltzing out, asking them to follow her, there was a certain level of astonishment that the women looked fresh-faced.

In the office, Marco and Marie sat beside each other on the couch, with the counselor in a leather chair across from them. Despite having walked in holding hands, as they sat, both Marco and Marie folded their hands into their laps.

“Miss Thatcher… Mr. Scandella… It’s a pleasure to meet you,”

Marie smiled kindly. The counselor introduced herself as Kathy, wanting to keep their meetings as casual as possible. In her words, she found it to be more effective when her clients felt like they were having a three-way conversation, instead of being asked intrusive questions. It all made sense, but Marie was still nervous.

“Let’s get right into it today… Marco, you’re a professional athlete, and Marie, you have your own business. Give me a very broad overview of your relationship,”

Marco took a deep breath in and Marie noted how he began to wring his fingers together. Apparently he was pretty nervous too. “We met in July in Montreal almost two years ago now. She was nineteen, I was twenty-four. It got hot and heavy real quick. She moved out here that September, by December she was pregnant. A year later, right before Christmas, I proposed and now we’re here three months later.”

“You two really wasted no time,” Kathy smiled and laced her fingers together. “How does it make you feel knowing you’re only twenty-one yet you already have a child and are engaged?”

“Well I love Sofia. I suppose I’m nervous about doing this so young. My parents paved the way on this path and it didn’t turn out well, but I know Marco and I are very different from them. I’m mostly nervous for what comes after marriage,”

Marie looked down at her lap and Kathy flicked her eyes between both of them. Marco had turned his head to watch Marie. “Marco has she ever expressed these fears to you?” All he could do was shake his head, afraid that if he looked away, he might never hear these fears again. Kathy nodded and grabbed her notepad, writing down a quick thought. “Marie tell me about your parents. What are they like?”

She coughed and practically refused to make eye contact with either of them. She knew that if she looked at Kathy, she’d get more nervous, and if she looked at Marco, she’d completely lose it. “My mom is… warm. But weak. And my dad, he’s overbearing and… abusive,”

“Sexually?” Kathy prodded.

Marco flicked his eyes to the counselor, wondering how she was able to pull all this out of Marie so quickly. They’d only just met. When he looked back down at Marie, she was still focused on her lap, but brought a hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose. He scooted in closer, wrapping his arm around the back of the couch behind her.

“Physically, emotionally…”

“He never sexually assaulted you as a child?”

Marie shook her head and sniffled, attempting her best to stay composed. Marco held his breath and pressed his lips to her head. She reached over and gripped onto his free hand tightly.

“When her dad found out about our relationship, he beat her. I found her a couple days later passed out and handcuffed in her bathroom.” Marco clenched the muscles in his jaw, and squeezed Marie’s hand. She could tell he was getting worked up. Clearly neither of them had gotten over that.

“It seems your father feels he has total control over your life. And when you act out, positively or negatively, he feels he’s losing that control.” Kathy leaned forward and offered Marie a box of tissues. “Marie, are you nervous that after you get married, Marco might change in ways like your father?”

She nodded and Marco felt his heart drop into his gut. It was breaking his heart, and a little disconcerting that she felt he’d do things to her that compared to her dad.

“Why don’t you tell him? Look at him, and express something you’re nervous about. The only way Marco is ever going to know if something is bothering you, is if you tell him.”

He stared at her, and she lifted her head, catching his gaze for the first time throughout the session. Marie wiped a tissue beneath her eyes and looked at Kathy before returning her glance to Marco, “I’m scared about you… expecting things of me after we’re married.” She looked back at Kathy in hopes of explaining, “My dad…”

“Tell him, Marie.”

Marie looked back up at Marco, and his stare was unwavering. Now she was nervous about him seeing her in a different light, like she was an entirely different woman. “He forced himself upon her and I’m afraid you’ll think you’re entitled to me... To have sex with me,”

“Marco,” Kathy got his attention on her for the moment. “I don’t want you to think you’ve done something wrong. A lot of women get nervous they’ll be… exploited in marriage. Many times wives don’t feel they have the option to say no to their husbands. You understand that married or not, Marie holds the right to decline sex... any type of sex,”

“Yes.” He looked back at Marie, “I always make sure to have your consent. When you say stop… I… I stop. I don’t understand where this is coming from,”

“I know; I just didn’t want to disappoint you. You know who I was when we met, and when you came to Boston, you saw how boys treated me. I gave you parts of myself because I wanted to show you that you were different,”

“I didn’t think anal sex was a prize.”

They stared at each other until Marco turned away. Now he was the one to look at his lap, taking his arm away from her shoulders. He let out a deep sigh and rubbed his fingers over his beard. Marie couldn’t look away now. She felt like he was disappointed in her, and that’s the only thing she never wanted. She reached up and linked her arm around his.

Marco looked at her again, cupped her cheek in his hand, and kissed her forehead. “I love you,”

“I don’t think you two appreciate how much you’ve accomplished.” Kathy smiled when they both looked at her, still entangled in each other’s arms. “In two years you’ve fallen in love and started a family. Marie you’ve become a very strong woman, not without some flaws, but we all have those. And Marco, you’ve become a reliable safe haven for her. You built a relationship founded on trust and respect for each other. Sometimes I see couples in here, and I think they’re crazy for wanting to get married. But I’m not in the business of telling people they shouldn’t be wed; I’m in the business of helping couples learn communication skills for the future. And out of everyone I see, I can honestly say I’m least worried about you two,”

Marie looked back up at Marco, finding he was already looking at her. She blushed and Marco grinned, leaning in to kiss her lips.

“But I have homework for the two of you… To be completed before our next meeting. We’ve touched upon probably the toughest topic today. I want you to go home and speak to each other about what you both expect sexually. What you expect in the next month, the wedding night, the years to come… What you’re willing to experiment with, and what you’re not, the boundaries of what you expect. Because once you flush that out, the other sides of your communication… the parts that are not so difficult to talk about… will come so much easier.”

In the car after the meeting, Marie and Marco held hands. Neither of them had known what to expect from the counseling, and it was quite a shock to know it had gotten that deep that quickly.

“Let’s just talk about it now. We’re already in the mindset of talking about tricky subjects, let’s just get the homework out of the way,” she offered, waving her free hand. It was like she was trying to get the subject as far away from her as possible. “Whatever comes to mind, if there’s even the slightest possibility of wanting it in the future, just say it.”

Marco nodded, waiting for Marie to start off the list. But when things fell completely silent, he looked over at her, realizing that she was waiting for him to start. “Bondage,”

Marie blushed. It was one thing to talk about sex, and another to be naming out all the things they wanted to do to each other. “No handcuffs… for obvious reasons. Or rope,”

“I was never planning on buying rope,” Marco giggled. “I was thinking along the lines of my ties, or belts.”

“That’s fine,” she pursed her lips and looked out the window, trying to think of things she’d want to add to their sex life. “Spanking?”

“Me spanking you, or us spanking Sofia?”

Although he meant it as a joke, Marie nodded her head, “you spanking me. But let’s talk about the other one as well. I don’t really like the idea of spanking our children as punishment,”

He took his eyes off the road momentarily, “I don’t either. My parents never spanked me. But I would definitely not be opposed to spanking you.”

“I feel like this is going to be a list of things I won’t do. Is there anything you’re against?”

“Butt play,” he deadpanned. “I’m not having anything go up my ass, unless it’s my doctors fingers during a prostate exam.”

“What about choking me?”

“Sometimes. Depending on the night,”

“Slapping me? Like across the cheek,”

Marco shook his head. “I’m very against that. I’m not going to hit you,”

“You’ll spank me, but you won’t hit me…”

“I will not do that. Slapping you across the face… that’s crossing a line for me. I don’t want to do that. Ever,” he brought her hand up to his mouth and kissed it softly. “Double penetration,”

Marie nearly choked on her breath. “Not with another guy…”

“I don’t want to share you. I mean with a vibrator, or dildo.”

She set her head back against the headrest, “like you in my ass and the toy in my vagina…?”

“Or the other way around,”

“I’d be willing to try that. Could be fun,” she shot him a quick smirk and brought his hand down to her lap. “Role play?”

“Oh yeah, I’m down.”

She smiled and tucked his fingertips in between her thighs. All this talk about different acts they’d like to experiment with was turning her on. “I would like to film us one night…” it nearly came out a whisper because part of her couldn’t believe she was saying it. “Take pictures and videos of us fucking…”

Marco’s cheeks turned a light pink color, and he licked his lips quickly. “I would really enjoy that,”

Notes

"All Of Me" by John Legend.

I hope y'all are continuing to enjoy the direction this story is headed! :D