Stockholm Syndrome

I sat at the top of the hill in Breckenridge with Coach and Danny a week later.

“No fancy tricks okay? Just do a simple run.” Coach tells me. I look down at the slopestyle course and my eyes are wide with excitement. I go down the course and it’s like I’ve never left. By the end of the weekend, I was back pulling all of my hardest tricks.

“Wow Nix, that was awesome!” Danny exclaims. We call it a day and head back to the cabin. I pull out my phone and immediately call Sidney.

“Hello?” he answers.

“Oh my god babe. It was amazing. It only took me a few days and I have all my tricks from slopestyle. It’s like I never stopped!” I say excitedly.

“I’m so happy to hear that Nix.”

“Yeah. Now tomorrow we’re going to start training for halfpipe which I know will be harder but I’m still excited.”

“Just remember to be careful.”

“I know. Don’t worry. I should let you go. Just wanted to say hi. I love you,” I say smiling.

“Bye Nix. Love you.” I end the call and climb into bed. I still felt the adrenaline from earlier and tossed and turned the rest of the night.

“Okay are you sure you want to try the double cork?” Bud asks me. A few days later I had the majority of my tricks back, but still had yet to try my hardest ones.

“It’s now or never,” I respond. I position myself at the top of pipe and drop in. I pick up speed and try to do the two rotations. I land hard on my back on the pipe and I’m totally winded. I move my limbs to see if I’ve broken anything and slowly stand up.

“Are you okay?” Bud asks worriedly.

“I think so. Maybe we should try the mctwist.” I was still shaken up from my fall but I had to get at least one of these tricks. I get back up top and drop in. I pull a simple method before gaining speed and trying the double mctwist. I come up short and smash my face on the lip of the pipe and my head snaps back. I look down and there’s blood on the snow. Frustrated tears spill over and I hear Bud rush over to me. I stand up and my cheek is burning. He holds a bandana to my cheek and shakes his head.

“I shouldn’t have let you try the mctwist. I knew your head wasn’t in it,” he says seriously.
We get back to the cabin and Coach is cleaning my cheek with alcohol. My entire upper right cheek was scraped open and bleeding.

“So we don’t have the big tricks yet. Those’ll come in time. Best not to rush it,” he says quietly.

“I’m over this trip,” I say irritably.

I walk through the door in Pittsburgh and hear the TV in den. I head in that direction and find Natalia and Sidney watching the news. I sit down beside Sidney and stare at the television.

“You’re back. What happened to your face?” Sidney asks concerned.

“I fell in the halfpipe,” I reply coldly.

“Wow that looks pretty bad,” Natalia says seriously.

“Thanks Nat, that makes me feel so much better.”

“I just meant that it looks serious.”

“Why did you come home early?” Sidney asks.

“Hmm I don’t know Sidney. Look at my face! That should be a clue.” I spit venomously. They both look taken aback and I leave the room before I make things worse. I take my stuff upstairs and run the tub. I strip off my clothes and lower my stiff body into the hot water. I take my hair out of its ponytail and submerge completely underwater. When I open my eyes under the water I see Sidney looking down at me so I resurface and let out the breath I was holding.

“What are you doing?” he asks.

“Trying to drown myself,” I respond dejectedly.

“That’s not funny.” He sits down on the floor beside the tub and looks at me expectantly.

“I’m guessing you’re here to talk?”

“What happened out there? One day you’re calling me yelling into the phone about the tricks you’re doing and the next you’re lashing out at us.”

“I’m nowhere where I need to be for halfpipe. I almost broke my back and snapped my neck out there trying to relearn these tricks.” I feel my throat tighten and I blink away tears.

“Nix that was your first time back. It’s not going to be a cakewalk. You have the rest of the season plus the offseason to get them. Don’t be so hard yourself,” he says sincerely. I wanted to take it out him but I couldn’t. His sincere eyes and kind words ultimately made me feel better.

“I look so gross. I can’t go out in public like this.”

“Honestly I think you look badass. It’s kind of hot,” he says smiling. I roll my eyes but I can’t help but grin. I stand up and his jaw drops.

“What?” I ask self-consciously. He stands up and turns me so my back is facing the mirror. I look over my shoulder in the reflection and see that the majority of back is bruised. “It looks worse than it feels.” He wraps a towel around me and I head into the bedroom where I throw on an old t-shirt. I braid my hair and climb into bed where I watch Sidney change into his pyjamas. He crawls into bed beside and wraps his large body around my small frame.

A couple weeks later Sidney was cleared to play the last few games of the season and I was anxious about him returning. I sat with Natalia in the stands during their last game against the Avalanche. I cringed anytime he got bumped and I found myself not watching a lot of the game.

“Phoenix he’s fine. They wouldn’t have cleared him if he wasn’t,” Natalia reassures me. The Penguins win 4-2 and I’m relieved that Sidney seemed fine. Even with the short break Sidney took, he ended up finishing first in the points race which guaranteed him the Art Ross Trophy.

The playoffs started and the Penguins would be facing the Rangers again. The Rangers get the first win but Sidney was focused. I wanted him to do everything he needed to do to make sure his head was in it. In Game 2, Sidney scored two goals in a matter of four minutes and thirty-nine seconds. I stood up from the couch and cheered loudly. The Penguins won Game 2 tying the series at one a piece. What happened next was unexpected. The Rangers came back and won three straight games knocking the Penguins out in the first round.

Notes

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