AUTUMN LEAVES

“Jesus Sidney! You scared the hell out of me! How long have you been standing there you creep?”, Autumn screamed trying to catch her breath. Sidney answered between laughs. “Sorry, not too long. I didn’t know you could dance like that and certainly not this early in the morning”.

“Well now that you interrupted my routine, you will help me put the breakfast together”. Autumn said with fake admonishment. Sidney trailed behind her as they took the stairs from the basement towards the kitchen. He was fascinated watching her dance and twirl with such finesse that only professional dancer would display. She looked happy and in her element. “Is Mario still sleeping?”, Sidney asked as they entered the kitchen. “No, he woke up a while ago actually. He’s spending Christmas day at Nathalie’s, with his children. So, we’re opening gifts when he’s back later this afternoon instead”. Autumn said with a small smile as she was setting up a cutting board and pans on the glass-top stove. Sidney leaned lazily on the opposite counter

“Does it bother you?”, Sidney asked with genuine interest. “That he’s spending time with his kids? Why should it? We spent Christmas eve together. I mean I would be alarmed if he did not go to see them”, she answered matter-of-factly. “Have you met them yet?” Sidney inquired further. “I did. The three of them. In case you’re wondering, they don’t seem to like the idea that their father is dating someone. I mean I get that. Does it bother me? Of course it does”. She continued as she was chopping veggies. “I don’t want them to see me as the woman who would take their father’s attention and love from them, you know. Let’s just say that it may take time for them to warm up to the idea of another woman in their dad’s life. And more time to warm up to me personally”.

Sidney sensed some sadness in her voice and a shift from her usual happy mood. “Oh you poor Lady Tremaine”, Sidney said jokingly. “Hold the phone, you know the name of Cinderella’s stepmother?”, Autumn asked incredulously. “You know it too!”, he shot back, blushing furiously. “Well I was a little girl once, who loved Cinderella! What’s your excuse Crosby?”, she asked playfully, trying not to burn the omelets. “I used to read it to my baby sister”, he answered honestly. Autumn thought it was the cutest thing he’s ever said. “It sounds like what a great brother would do”, she told him as she squeezed his bicep affectionately, earning another blush from him.

“Will you set up the coffee machine and squeeze these oranges please?”. He nodded and got to work. “I’m going to prepare some mimosas for these shitheads, they need a slow detox after last night”, she added speaking of her two friends who were still sleeping at 10 in the morning. “Wow, do you use that foul mouth around the children Dr. Scott?”. The two laughed and worked together to finish breakfast.



*****

“Hey, you’re back!”, Autumn greeted her boyfriend at the door. “Come on let’s open some presents”, she said gleefully. Entering the family room, Mario saw Sidney on the phone with his parents and was happy that he agreed to spend the day there.

As they started exchanging gifts, Sidney was relieved he decided to go with Autumn’s gift number two and not the first one, which was diamond earrings. It would have been an odd gift seeing that Mario, her boyfriend, had gotten her a necklace with matched diamond earrings. Autumn took the last gift under the tree and assumed it’s from Sidney. She was curious as she held the thick envelope in her hand. “I hope you like it”, Sidney said nervously.

She opened it and read out loud. “A gift card from Go Ape! A season pass for treetop adventure…. Tarzan swings…”, Autumn kept reading but more quietly, surprised at Sidney’s choice of gift. She looked at him with wide-open eyes and a huge grin on her face. “How did you know?”, she simply asked. “At the family skate, I heard you telling Catherine Letang that zip-lining is the one thing you want to do before you’re 30”, Sidney answered bashfully. Mario was smiling from ear to ear. “Wow that’s a great gift Sid! But you probably haven’t heard the rest of that conversation”, Mario said and continued as he jokily whispered loud enough for Autumn to hear. “She’s terrified of heights”.

“Oh”, was all Sidney could say. “But hey, that could be an opportunity for you to face that fear, right!”, he added in a hopeful tone. Autumn turned to Mario, “Will you go with me”. Mario’s face fell. “I would love to, but you do know that it’s not a good activity for my back sweetheart”, he told her apologetically. “Oh, that’s right. Well then, it’s decided. Sidney, you will come with me. I’m not risking my life all alone. You got me into this and you better tag along”. Sidney smiled and agreed. “Okay then. My palms are already sweaty at thought alone”, Autumn said, exhaling unsteadily. “God help you Sid”, Mario joked at her expense.

Sidney decided that he would do his best to spend more time with Autumn despite the physical attraction he has always felt towards her. Maybe if they become friends he won’t look at her the same way.

*****

“I know it stings, but try not to move”, Autumn calmly told Sidney as she was removing the stitches from his upper lip. It was the end of February and the hockey season was getting more heated with the playoffs approaching. Sidney had yet another battle wound, but instead of driving all the way from Sewickley to the rink to see the medical team for a simple procedure, Autumn offered to do it for him. Plus, it was not part of his game-day routine. In the past two months, the two have gotten close. It helped that Autumn has moved in with Mario, making her a 10-minute drive away from his place. She often came to Penguins games and various functions. In his free time, he found himself going to Mario’s house more frequently to have lunch or dinner, or to hang out with Autumn whenever Mario went on business trips.

Once she was done, she tossed her gloves in the guest bathroom’s trash as Sidney stood up from where he was sitting at the edge of the tub. “You’re going out with us after the game tonight, right?”, Sidney asked as he inspected the small pink scar in the mirror. Autumn sighed knowing that Sidney will not like the answer. “I don’t think I will. Before you say anything, I feel that I always go out with you guys and it feels wrong that Mario is never there”.

Sidney was surprised at her excuse. “Are you telling me that Mario doesn’t like you to go out with us?”. “No, no! It’s not Mario. On the contrary, he likes that I spend time with the team, “his bigger family”, as he calls it. I just..., last time I got some unwanted attention at that bar and I felt out of place. You weren’t there”. “What happened?”, Sidney inquired with some angry undertone, already anticipating and hating where this conversation was going. He knew the attention Autumn gets when they’re out and he’s done a good job at shielding her from countless jerks in the past. “Nothing new, just a drunk asshole that didn’t take no for an answer. Then he got really handsy. I slapped him square in the face, didn’t seem to stop him so Phil and Haggy took care of it, I hate putting anyone in this position”.

She looked in distress and the anger Sidney was feeling was replaced with compassion and concern. “Autumn, the guys love you and believe me they would do it again if need be. That’s what we do, we look out for each other. Now please tell me they punched the fucker hard enough he could no longer breath?”. She laughed at that as she used her sleeve to wipe a small tear from the corner of her eye. “Maybe a black eye. I just don’t want this to end on social media or on the news, it will be bad for the guys and for Mario too. Oh god, I’m overreacting”. “Must be your time of the month”, Sidney joked earning a punch in the stomach.

They both laughed and Sidney enveloped her in a warm hug in the middle of guest bathroom, something he found himself doing often as their friendship grew. He was never one for physical affection, but Autumn with her warm nature brought that side out of him. She sniffled between laughs and kept her face buried in his chest. “Thank you”, she whispered softly. She pulled back while still in his arms and stared into his eyes. “You’re a great friend Sid, I don’t know what I would do without you sometimes”, she said as she buried her face once again in his hoody.

He rested his chin on the top of her head as he rubbed her back softly with one of his hands. He gulped and struggled to steady his racing heart, trying to enjoy the moment. Her body was a perfect mold for his. Having her in his arms had a strangely calming effect on him every time. Before Autumn could start to question the hug, he pulled himself away from her and smiled. “You’re coming tonight”, he simply stated as he left her standing in her spot.

*****

Autumn winced at the way Sidney awkwardly hit the board following a rough check. “I can’t believe he went back on the bench and not down the tunnel after that hit. Is he going to be okay?”, she asked an injured Kris Letang as they watched together the last game of the regular season from the owner’s suite. Kris sighed exasperated from the number of injuries that were piling up before the playoffs. “I hope so. Don’t worry Sid is a smart player. He listens to his body. He wouldn’t stay in the game if he can’t play”, he reassured her. “We’ll see him after the game”, Kris added with a reassuring smile.

The media scrum seemed to take forever and Sidney couldn’t wait to shower and leave. His wrist was throbbing and losing the last game of the season did not sit well with him. As he finally made it to the players parking, he could see a tall silhouette leaning against the passenger’s door of his car. As he approached, Autumn walked hurriedly towards him. “Hey! Are you okay?”, she asked with concern. “Sorry about the game”, she added giving him a comforting hug. Sidney was reluctant to hug her back. All sorts of emotions were swimming in his head. From losing the last game, to his problematic wrist, the nerves for the upcoming playoffs, but mostly at that moment, his unmistakable feelings for the woman who was hugging him so tenderly.

Sidney looked defeated, from his stance to the frown on his handsome face. She knew him well enough that she thought all he needed was a warm hug and no talking about what went on tonight. His breathing was shaky and she could feel wetness on her neck where he buried his face. This was new, an uncharted territory for Autumn. She’s never seen him cry before. So, she did was she thought was best. She rubbed his back while saying calming words. She even combed his wet her with her fingers, something that she knew can soothe a baby as well as a 200-pound athlete.

Autumn felt how intimate their position was, but she couldn’t find it in herself to deny him in the vulnerable state he was in. She knew that he was not at ease with expressing his emotions and had no shoulder to cry on at home. She was happy to be able to soothe him, even if it was for just few minutes. Her heart broke for him. He held the whole team on his shoulder, the whole league even. He faced pressure and expectations day in and day out since a very young age. Above it all, he was so hard on himself and did not accept losses very well. Sidney Crosby never gets nor give himself a break, when he desperately needed one.

After few moments of silent embrace, Autumn whispered softly in his ear. “It’s gonna be okay you know. I’m always here for you. I will hear you out, even if yelling and cursing are all you could muster”. “Oh Autumn, you have no idea, do you?”, Sidney spoke with a hoarse voice. He pulled his face from her embrace, his eyes fixated on hers. His hot breath was an inch away from her face. That was it, he couldn’t hold it in any longer. He needed to let it out. The truth was threatening to suffocate him. The same truth that may cost him everything.

Notes

Thanks for reading, hope you're enjoying the story so far.

Charlie