He had my hair firmly in his hand. He was thrusting roughly into me and my back arched higher at each thrust. His thighs were warm against mine as he pushed himself completely in. I moaned loudly and he pulled my hair harder, which wretched my back. He had one hand on my hip and pulled me even harder into him. I felt his warm lips on my neck and I couldn't help but smile. He put a pillow underneath my hips and pushed me so I was laying flat on my stomach. Both his hands were on my lower back as he plowed home. Electricity ran through me as he wedged one hand between me and the bed and massaged my clit.

"Fuck, Brandon!" I screamed as my entire body tighted. My head was light and for a second my vision seemed to blur. He growled leaning his face into my shoulderblade as he came. We took a moment to catch out breaths and laid next to each other. He wrapped his arm around me and brougth me closer to him. My head was on his chest and I couldn't help, but start crying.

"Baby?" he said looking at me.

"I don't want to leave you. I do really do care about you." I cried burying my face in his muscular chest. I just had so many feelings I didn't even know what to do. Was it wrong to sleep with Brandon? I hadn't exactly broken up with him yet, but James and I already kissed. I didn't know what was wrong or what was right anymore.

"But you don't.......love me."

"Not yet.."

"Be with him. I fucking hate it, but you love him so"

"I'm sorry" I say regaining my voice.

"Stop okay? Just stop. I get it. You like me, but I'm not...him."

---

"Hey you're finally back!" James said greeting me as I walked into his place. He jumped off the couch and gave me a huge hug. He squeezed my sides and picked me up. He gave me a passionate kiss before setting me down.

"How are you babe?" I asked.

"I'm good. You got back just in time. We have a couple days of" He smiled cheekily walking into the kitchen. He sat at the counter and finished his PB&J sandwich.

"Well aren't I in luck?" I said pulling off my hat, gloves, scarf, jacket and Sorel boots. I follwed him in and opened the fridge. There was only beer and smart water in the fridge.

"Is this what you eat when I'm gone?" I asked folding my arms. He looked up at me with huge puppy dog eyes and nodded. I shook my head, but sent a kind smile towards him.

"So what are you plans for the day?" I asked sitting at the counter and swinging my legs over his thigh. He placed his hand on my inner thigh and traced his thumb in small circles.

"Nothing really. You don't go back to work until tomorrow right?"

"Yep yep" I smile checking my phone. I already had a text from Anita. Anita's my best friend. I called her before leaving Montreal about what happened with Brandon and she said she'd send me a text later in the day.

"Hmm. what do you want to do? I think there's a Steelers game tonight." he said between bites.

"Nice. wanna have some people over?" I asked, running my fingers through his beloved hair.

"Yeah that sounds good."

"Well in that case I need to go to the store. You have no food. No wonder you're so skinny" I joked and poked him in the side. While he fininshed his lunch I put the clothes from my suitcatse into washing machine.

We headed out to the closest Market District and walked inside. I pushed the cart and he had his hand on the small of my back. After a few minutes of shopping we were stopped by a couple male fans. James signed some stuff and we kept walking. After a few more minutes we were stopped by a group of teenage girls. I really didn't mind waiting while he signed stuff.

"Is that you're girlfriend?" One of the little blondes asked him. I stood about 5 feet away from them, pretending to read the nutrtional facts on a soymilk box.

"Yeah, she's great" I could hear the smile in James' voice. A collective laugh went through the group. I raised my eyebrows surprised, but I didn't turn around.

"But you're hot, and she's kinda fat, and black" One of the girls said.

"Jessica!" one of the other girls scolded her.

"What! We were all thinking it?"

By the time I turned around James' jaw was locked and his eyes narrowed.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

"What, I'm just saying I could totally see you with someone like me. Or a model or something" she smiled wildly.

"Go fuck yourself" he said before turning and walking to me.

"James!" I reprimanded. He just dipped me and kissed me hard, making sure the girls would see. I heard a few scoffs and he set me back on my feet.

"Let's go." He practically dragged me by my arm out of the grocery store.

"Can you fucking believe some people. Fucking shit." he said obviously angry. He was driving home much faster than he usually goes. I sat with my arms crossed in the passengers seat.

"Babe?" he asked, but I stayed silent.

"Babe!" he stared at me while we were at the red light.

"What?!" I said with a more annoyed tone than I meant.

"Aren't you mad. Aren't you going to say somehting."

"What is there to say? You've said it all for me."

"What is that supposed to mean."

"You don't have to pretend to be all angry and upset for me. I don't care. You don't have to defend me." I said glancing at him for just a moment.

"Yeah, cause I'm just gonna sit here and not defend you. Besides, I'm not pretending. And I know you care otherwise you'd be talking about somehing."

"Oh so now I never stop talking? Is that it?" I knew my comments wouldn't make the situation feel any better, but it was like word vomit. I just couldn't stop"

"That's not what I meant and you know that. God, what the hell did I do wrong? You want me to just let people talk shit about you and sit there like it doesn't bother me?"

"I want you to not tell fans to 'fuck themselves'. Shit gets around. Next thing you know they'll think you're some asshole or somethin-"

"I don't care if they think I'm an asshole. I'm not going to let anyone talk to you like that."

"Forget it. Can we just drop it."

"Why the fuck are you mad at me? I didn't call you fat."

"Just drop it James"

"The fuck did I do?!"

"I'm just mad okay, leave me alone." there was an awkward silence as we pulled into his driveway.

"Are you mad at me?".

"No. I'm just, mad at the whole thing."

"I'm sorry. They were bitches"

"It's whatever" I said grabbing a few bags from the backseat and walking inside. I set some things down on the kitchen island and leaned my back against the fridge.

"Babe, I love you" he said standing inches away from me. "Don't listen to those fucking 15 year-olds. You're beautiful. I wouldn't want you to change a thing.

Notes

Sorry it took so long to update. I've been busy watching hockey :D