AAOOOSC! The Movie!

That night in McMoose's, all the Canadians and Americans are eating at their own separate tables, watching men's single figure skating in silence, hearing the Russian gibberish from the TV.
"That dude is goooooo..." Chris stuffs a spoonful of Chobani in the middle of his sentence.
"All the Americans are good!" Roberto tells him.
"Hey!" Toews snaps. "Us Canadians are also good! We won!"
"Against the Norwegians," PK reminds him.
Everyone starts laughing/quacking.
"If we would've lost...then on my sharpies, that would've been a disgrace!"
"They were scary...." Marleau hides his face behind a Happy Meal box.
"Aiy, they're not scary, Patrick!" Roberto smacks Marleau's back. "If someone was scary, then it would be Rask!"
"Tuukka heard his name."
Everyone turns around, looking at the entrance. There, the Finnish team are standing in the doorway.
"Teemu! Sami!" Corey and Ryan walk over to their friends and welcome them in kindly, quacking.
"Hey, Antti!" Sidney waves at Antti.
"Hello, Sidney!" Antti smiles and waves back.
"Ooo...figure skating! Pretty!" Kari walks over to an empty, round table, and sits down, staring at the TV with a dreamy look.
"Niemi! Sit over here!" Jonathan waves his hands in the air, trying to grab Antti's attention.
"Yea, man! Over here, dude!" Patrick slaps the empty seat next to him.
"Can you sit over here with me, Antti?" Sidney asks.
"C'mon, Nemo, sit with us!" Jonathan pleads.
"Why don't we just sit at our own table together?" Antti asks them.
Sidney frowns. "Fine."
Sidney, Jonathan, and Patrick walk slowly to the table where Kari is at and sit down with Antti and Tuukka with their trays. A waiter comes over and gives the Finns their food. Antti hands him 730 Russian Ruble.
"FOOD!!!" Tuukka stuffs a handful of fries in his mouth.
"Tuukka, slow down!" Antti takes a bite of his salad. "Mm, much better than the Olympic food."
"Totally." Jonathan slurps on his milkshake.
"Kari man, you are gonna eat, dude?" Patrick asks Kari.
Kari is still looking at the TV. "If only 1D were skating...."
Sidney eats an apple slice. "I don't think he's gonna eat; he's too busy thinking of onesies ice skating."
"NOOO!!! Kari no die!!!" Tuukka grabs a hamburger and stuffs it in Kari's mouth.
Kari looks down at the hamburger, cross-eyed. He takes it out slowly. "Uh, thanks for caring for me, Tuukka."
Tuukka gives him a big smile. "You welcome!"
All the Canadians groan. "Aw, man! Not another American!" PK cries.
The American ice skater skates onto the ice and gets into position, waiting for the music to start.
"What's his name?" Corey asks.
The TV shows his name in Russian and in English.
"Drew...Brees?" Marleau whimpers. "He sounds scary...." He sinks underneath the table.
"Aiy, you're scary for goodness' sake!" Roberto tells Marleau.
"Me? Scary? Nuh-uh. I can't be scary...."
Drew begins to dance gracefully.
Mike begins to chant, "Fall, fall, fall, fall, fall, fall...."
The rest of the Canadians begin to join him with some Finnish players.
"Well, that's nice! Carey's going against my team!" Jimmy points out. Ryan throws a fry at Jimmy. "I meant our team." Jimmy eats the fry.
All the Canadians groan again when Drew ends his perfect performance.
"Dang it! He didn't fall!" Toews cries.
"That would've been scary if he did!" Marleau tells him.
Drew gets 99.09 as his score.
Corey and Ryan begin to throw fries at the TV, quacking angrily.
"Okay, okay, duckies, at ease, at ease!" Sidney tells them. "That's enough now, at ease!" Teemu and Sami join them and begin throwing more food and quacking loudly. Sidney groans. "Oh my Bubbys."
Cam walks over to his angry friends and starts quacking at them. The other Ducks stop throwing food and turn to him sharply; they start quacking at him. Before you know it, they have a huge argument, just quacking loud and angrily.
Kari slams his head on the table, covering his ears with his hands. "Ohmigosh!!! This is the exact reason why I hate ducks! Ugh!"
"This has turned to a madhouse," Antti says with his blue eyes wide.
"Not a madhouse, Nemo," Jonathan tells him, nudging him, "a duckhouse! Get it?"
Antti looks at Jonathan, unamused. "Yes, Jonathan, I get it."
Tuukka stands up quickly with a mean look on his face. "SHUT UP, DUCKS!!!"
Everyone falls silent. The room was so quiet, you could hear a puck drop; the only sound was the muttering of Russian from the TV and clanking of pans from the kitchen.
Tuukka gives a wide smile. "Tuukka thank you." He sits back down.
Reto and Tobias barges into the restaurant. "Jonas's friend! Jonas's friend!"
Sidney raises his hand. "I'm Jonas's friend!"
They rush over to their table. "Yes! You guys!"
"What's going on?" Antti asks.
"I think we found Jonas," Reto tells them.
"Where?" Jonathan asks.
"In the Black Sea," Tobias replies.
"Typical, man," Patrick comments.
"And you just left him there?" Sidney raises his eyebrows.
Reto hesitates for a moment. "Well...we had to."
"Why?" Jonathan asks.
"Because he's a duck," Tobias replies.
"No, duh he's a duck, dude! He's always a duck, man," Patrick tells them.
"No! No, no, no! Nein! He's a duck!" Reto exclaims. (No!)
Sidney, Jonathan, Antti, and Patrick exchange looks.
"You gotta check it out for yourselves. It's hard to...erklären," Tobias tells them. (...explain.)
"Alright, guys." Antti stands up and points to the doors. "To the Black Sea! Via bikes! Let's go!"
The GHP leave McMoose's quickly, leaving the two Swiss and Finnish goalies behind.

Notes