“Thanks for doing this,” I muttered exhaustedly to Jen as I stumbled into her SUV after we loaded my suitcase and boardbag into the back.

“Not a problem,” she muttered back sounding equally exhausted.

We were both running on empty, waiting and hoping for a burst of adrenaline to kick in.

Jen had gotten back from the latest Euro excursion just yesterday, while I had stepped off the plane mere minutes ago. It’d been the first competition since my injury where the scores went towards Sochi qualification. Unsurprising to myself, my competitors, my judges, and anyone else, I had come out to play; I’d put up some of my best scores. Unfortunately, I had been sick as a dog the entire time. When I wasn’t competing I had essentially lived med tent. The doctors ran tests but came up with nothing so they insisted it must be food poisoning. And considering no one else in the circuit had caught whatever I had (Jen was especially healthy during this trip), food poisoning it was. Plus, I was starting to feel a bit better, so I didn’t argue. In addition, it was just a short trip abroad before I was headed back to Colorado for a few days, so I could rest back home per the doctors’ orders.

But rest was a relative term.

The entire Pittsburgh Penguins team were due at my house in a mere matter of hours.

At the time I had suggested this, I don’t know what I was thinking. Clearly I wasn’t. It had started off with ‘If you invite Sidney and Geno over, you have to invite Paul and James. And then you have to invite Marc. If you invite Marc, you have to invite Kris Letang. But then you also have to invite Duper, Kunitz, and Jussi Jokinen. If you invite one Finster, you have to invite the other, but if Maatta comes, then Bennett and Bortz had to come too. And then it just snowballed from there until I realized the entire 23ish person roster would be heading over for lunch and the afternoon.

It really was something different for me.

My house didn’t normally receive a lot of company. Boarders I had known for years came over often whenever they were in town--it was an easy stop if their flight was delayed or they were leaving later from a competition or some such thing. And Jen’s family had come over once or twice when they were in town visiting her. But that was about it. Sure, these were the Penguins, people I knew, but it would still be a little odd to have such a full house.

“Lily,” Jen nudged me as she leaned over and entered the code to get into the gated driveway. She pulled up, using her own garage opener to click the door open.

I ended up grabbing my suitcase while she took care of my boardbag. I knew she would just drag it into the garage and leave it for me to unpack later. Quickly, I rolled the luggage into the laundry room, registering the several pieces of clean laundry hanging and waiting to be put away, but I ignored that for now. Instead, I rushed upstairs to my room, making a beeline for my bathroom and a hot shower in an attempt to feel human again.

After the shower, I headed into my closet and stared at a pair of sweats for a long time. I could just wear those, the guys wouldn’t actually care if I did. Instead, I tugged on a pair of light jeans and a green sweater that buttoned in the back. Heading back into the bathroom, I grimaced as I applied some mascara not actually wanting to deal with anything else more complicated at the moment before running my fingers through my hair quickly before whipping all of that mess up into a loose bun.

Fortunately, when I reached the kitchen, I found Jen had actually grocery shopped the giant list I had sent her before I had boarded my plane. I prep worked like an insane person-- I had meat marinating and veggies cleaned and cut as well as fruit in record time. As well as the list I had put together, Jen had gone out and ordered from our favorite bakery and had gotten a bunch of other snacks that compromised for hockey players and me and Jen. Basically, it looked like she bought the entire grocery store. As well as beer. A ton of beer, which I wasn’t sure if they drank the day before a hockey game, but maybe. If not, Jen would take it and her friends would down it for sure.

‘Call from Russian Bear’ my phone announced before it began to ring loudly. I quickly answered it, putting it on speaker.

“Hey, you almost here?” I asked quickly in Russian to Geno as I continued to slice the pineapple.

“Lily?”

Not Geno. Definitely not Geno.

“Sidney,” his name played on my lips as it came out more as a whisper than anything else. My heart soared.

“Lily,” Sid’s voice was warm now, not confused. I shivered slightly as I thought about the last time he was in this house. That time in the kitchen.

“Can you puh-lease get a room?” Jen’s voice was loud as it interrupted my thoughts, “Or at the very least wipe the drool off of your face? I don’t want it getting into the pineapple.”

I grimaced. Sidney heard that for sure.

“Drooling, eh?” the laughter was hard not to hear in his voice.

“You know how Jen exaggerates things,” I muttered before I wiped my mouth for extra measure....just to make sure there weren’t any fluids leaking or whatever, “So what’s up?”

“We are about 5 minutes out, Rivers,” Sidney’s change to formality into his captain’s tone meant someone was paying attention to the conversation now.

“Okay, I’ll be there to let you in,” I replied simply.

“Sounds good, see you soon,” and the line went dead.

I set the knife down, and turned to Jen who was playing some game on her phone as she sat on a stool, “They are going to be here in about 5 minutes. I’m going to head to the gate to let them in.”

“Eh, You stay here, I’ll go let the guys in.” Jen said slipping off of her stool.

“No, you relax,” I began to protest. Jen had already gone above and beyond for this.

“I’m hoping the fresh air will help keep me awake,” she waved her hand at me.

I narrowed my eyes, knowing that this was not the reason, but I didn’t know what she had planned. Nor did I want to speculate the inner workings of her mind.

The front door slammed before I could protest further. Shaking my head, I finished slicing the pineapple and neatly placed it on the giant fruit plater before I went to wash my hands along with the cutting board and knife.

“Lily!” I heard a voice yell from the front door.

Quickly, I wiped my hands quickly on a towel and bolted through my house towards the foyer. I skidded to a halt as I saw the mass of men who were starting to pile into my house.

I couldn’t help the grin that spread across my face as I took in the group.

“Lily, this house is incredible,” Paul whistled he walked through the front door and around the front entrance. My foyer was a little more grand than I had intended, even though I had gone over it with the builders. The house had been built to have company, to have people over, but those plans obviously changed. The foyer had a cathedral ceiling and a chandelier that emulated a tree branch. The floors in here, like the majority of the floors in the house, were a dark wood and the front entrance was painted a rich gray color.

“Shoes off!” Geno yelled before any of the guys could get any further.

I grinned at my Russian and reached around and up to ruffle his hair before I moved out of the way allowing the guys more space. But Geno already had me in one of his big hugs.

“I missed you,” the Russian was so easy to understand despite him muttering it into the top of my head.

“I missed you too,” I sighed back before Geno let me go, “I am so excited for tonight. I have a surprise.”

“Your accent is getting better,” the tone in Geno’s voice was, pride? I stepped back and looked up at him. He was positively beaming down at me.

“I practiced with the Russian boarders. Had them only speak Russian with me.” I confessed.

“English please! Seriously, you two are like communicating in your secret twin language or something” James yelled from the mass of men busy taking their shoes off now.

Geno and I turned toward his voice and shot the exact glare in the direct.

“Oh! And Congratulations!” James yelled wriggling between Paul and Beau Bennett and before anything else could happen, he picked me up and spun me around.

“Oof no. Gentle Nealsy!” I moaned.

James looked at me suspiciously, as he set me down.

“I had a bit of food poisoning” I explained, “Still not fully recovered.”

Neal nodded seriously, “Pauly you need to be more careful!”

“Yes James, since it is most likely that I would do bodily harm to Lily, I will be very care.” Paul scoffed, rolling his eyes at the mussed up hair forward, “But congratulations and it is nice to see you.”

Paul leaned in and gave me a gentle one arm hug, squeezing reassuringly before he let go. I couldn’t help but give the Minnesotan defenseman a big smile. As he stepped to the side, I finally saw Sidney.

Sid was in a pair of dark jeans and a sweater that was fitted just right. He looked good; really good. Clearly he had gotten a hair cut recently but not too much off. However, as I knew he was, he had just started his no shave November or whatever it was called, so that ridiculous thing on his upper lip was coming back. But all of that didn’t matter. Sidney was here.

“Crosby,” it came out much more breathy than I had meant it.
“Rivers,” Sid nodded back at me, “Geno told me about your win, congratulations.”

I bit back my smile. ‘Geno told you about it my ass,’ I thought rebelliously.

Sidney had spent hours complaining to me about how impossible it was to find live streams of any of my competitions, especially this one. When he wasn’t able to find one, once again, he asked Jen to text him at any and every opportunity she could to update him on how I was doing. To me, that meant after slope-style or half-pipe was finished she should shoot him a text--or better yet, I would just call him at the end of my day and tell him. To Sid, he wanted to know when my run was supposed to start, when my run would actually began, what tricks I pulled (even though he still was learning what everything was so he didn’t understand what Jen was saying), when I finished, my scores, how the scores lined up to every previous year I had competed at said competition, what those scores meant for Sochi, when I sneezed or if I threw up again, if I kept hydrated enough, if I was wearing my gloves or if I had forgotten them. Just all the basic stuff he kept insisting. But Sidney made it very clear that I wasn’t allowed to text him because that would distract me from what I was there to do.

His behavior was a little obsessive, but I knew it wasn’t him trying to be controlling, he was just trying to be involved as much as he could. I was pretty sure it was Sidney speak for he cared.

“Thanks Crosby,” I answered with a small nod, trying to keep my voice as neutral as it could.

“Jesus,” James groaned dramatically, “Why can’t you two just get over yourselves?”

I ignored him, “Right! Um, house tour?”

I took the group around the house quickly, explaining the basics: that they should make themselves comfortable, if they needed a nap go for it--I had several guest-rooms plus lots of couches, the fridge outside was stocked with liquids: beer, gatorade, sodas, and water, all the food was in the kitchen fridge or panty and if they went hungry it was their own fault, that and there would be salmon, chicken, and steak later, etc. What I found most surprising is that the guys found the study or what had turned into more a trophy room most interesting.

“You’re like, really good,” Bortz said open mouthed as he stared at the different trophies.

The trophies were organized in the different shelves by country they were won in and in their chronological order, though the Olympic medals were in the center in specially made cases. The wall of shelves had initially been built to be filled with books had quickly become the resting place for the trophies, accolades, and some pictures shortly after I had closed on the house in Washington and moved all the trophies down here and realized I had not had a spot to put them all in. It hadn’t been poor planning, I had just thought to keep stuff like that not at this house.

I shrugged, “I’m okay.”

“Best,” Geno supplied, “Lily best. And soon add to her gold medals.”

I blushed hating the attention Geno always put on me when it came to this. I also was really hating this expectation that I would automatically win both events this year. Geno loved to brag about me, but it always felt awkward to me. Especially this.

“So this one is from the one in Italy and this is Vancouver?” Beau asked with such an eager look on his face. Speaking of his face, his nose was nearly pressed against the box containing the gold medal for Torino.

“I can take them out if you want to get a close look,” I grinned at him. Beau’s eyes went even wider and he couldn’t hide his excitement.

“Really?”

“Course,” I said reaching up for the first box that held the Turin gold medal.

Carefully, I slid open the back of the box and pulled out the beautiful medal that had represented my childhood dreams. Just 14 when I had won the medal I had been just a baby, so innocent in the world, so new. At the time, I wasn’t able to grasp what I was doing. All I knew was that I was doing, what I loved. But not really the gravity of what it all meant. I was the black horse coming in; I had come into the world of boarding that year as a newcomer, squeaking through qualifying and then in Italy I broke the point record. It was the “Look at me, look at me, how do you like them apples,” attitude I approached so many things at the time. I had liked to make the splash; it was the way to attract attention and thus sponsors. Sponsors meant pressure off of mom to mortgage payments or any of the other bills (snowboarding was very expensive). And of course then there was plenty of extra. But even with that, the two most important things to me were snowboarding and Mom.

I handed it to Beau and said, “You all can look at it.”

Turning back to the Olympic shelf, I reached for the next box to take out the next medal. My hands shook slightly as I pulled out my second gold medal. Vancouver represented something so different. I was still reckless at the time, but I was a little more smart about it. It had been that awkward stage of being not quite a teenage but definitely an adult. For the 2010 Olympics, I had qualified with the highest score not only out of all of the women, but the males as well. There hadn’t been any doubt in my mind nor anyone elses that I would be winning gold. True, I had faced more obstacles than at 14, but those were distractions of other varieties. And yet, I could still fall back on the two most important things in my life: snowboarding and Mom. But my world had opened up a little, and I had met Jen who had become an important part of my life. So maybe three things unchanging in my life. But even at 18 I had been so naive.

I gripped the golden achievement, biting my lip. I hadn’t actually held it since I had put it in the box years ago. Almost 4 years ago. How much had really changed since then?

And what would Sochi hold? I still had snowboarding, but I didn’t have mom. How was I really supposed to do this alone? A person could be in the best shape ever but so much of the Olympics were mental. I had shut down as she was dying. Even with the great escape of the 2010 summer, all of what Geno did, all of what his family did, was that all enough? I am most certainly not the same person I was before she died. But what person was I now? Could I handle Sochi? Plus everyone was already talking like I had already won BOTH of the medals I was trying for. Plus the committee had made it pretty clear that they wanted to give me the captaincy. What the actual fuck. I hadn’t even qualified for Sochi yet.

I felt someone nudge me, it would be Geno though, sensing something was off. I Inhaled quietly still facing the bookshelf, adding, “And here is Vancouver.”

“Where met Lily!” Geno’s voice boomed from across the room in a different direction than I was expecting. I tilted my head to the side confused to check out who was checking on me.

Sidney.

Sid was artfully standing looking up at one of the other trophies while his body was turned towards me. He looked like he was having some internal debate which was causing him great strife.

“Here,” I handed him my Vancouver medal confused with what was going on with him.

He studied me for a moment before gently accepting the medal from me, “Did you guys know that all of the medals from Vancouver have a different design on them? It was supposed to reflect the individual’s own unique story of how they made it there.”

That sounded a lot like one of those random facts which I would ramble off to him when the team would lose to distract him. This little tradition we had started last year that had carried on through this fall. It was something we could do in public that no one thought was odd. Well, no more odd than anything else.

I bit my lip as I watched Sidney slipped the ribbon over his head and let the medal rest over his head.

My stomach did something very different than it had ever done before. It wasn’t the churning it had constantly been doing over the last several days from being sick. And it was different from the pterodactyls. My chest was constricting and my heart was racing.

Sidney Crosby was wearing my medal. And all I knew was I really liked it.

“Lily?”

I jerked my head around.

It seemed everyone in the room was looking at me expectantly.

“Uh, sorry, jetlagged,” I waved my hand in the air.

“So how can you get two this year?”

“Slopestyle was added this year, in addition to halfpipe,” I answered slightly more tensely than I meant to, “It was something we’ve been pushing for a while.”

“What’s slopestyle?” Beau asked as he handed my first medal to Bortuzzo.

“Basically a downhill course with a bunch of various obstacles and jumps,” I answered in a most basic form as I could for Beau.

“Do you have a bandaid?” Sidney asked abruptly.

Everyone turned to look at him.

He shrugged his shoulders, “I have a hangnail that keeps catching on everything. It’s driving me crazy.”

“Uhm, yeah,” I stammered, “Just upstairs. Guys, make yourselves comfortable.”

Sidney trailed me as we headed upstairs to my bathroom.

“You look exhausted,” he said behind me as we walked down the landing towards my room.

“Whenever people say that,” I grumbled as I opened the door to my bedroom, “It’s really just their polite attempt to tell another person they look like shit.”

“Hey,” I felt Sid grasp, then tug my hand and I allowed him full well know well what was coming next as I turned into him.

I was expecting the rush of being swept into his arms, the aggressive and passionate meeting of lips and catch of breath to follow. Whenever we hadn’t seen each other for several weeks, it was the standard greeting once we were in private. Hell, it was the standard greeting if we had gone a couple hours without seeing each other.

But it didn’t.

Sidney pulled me into his arms and just held me tight. My body stiffened for a moment, surprised by this change.
Let’s face it, sex with Sidney was great. Mind blowing really. It took a couple practice runs to get it up to the mind blowing level, but both of us weren’t quitters and were perfectionists. Plus this sort of practice wasn’t really something either of us objected to.

But these other types of intimate moments still caught me off guard. It was a type of vulnerability that scared me.

I exhaled slowly, burying my head into his chest before I took a deep breath. The smell of Sidney and the smell of clean laundry made my head spin. Shutting my eyes I felt myself just relax every so in his strong body, allowing him to hold me up, allowing him to hold up my stress of snowboarding, anxiety about the Olympics, the fact I was still not on speaking terms with my agent, and just about everything else.

“You said you needed a bandaid?” I smiled tiredly up at him, finally acknowledging that we needed to get back down to the people downstairs. We had been standing holding each other for a while, much longer than it took to actually get a bandaid.

“Before you looked like you needed an out,” Sid admitted with a half smile and tilt of a head, “Plus, I just wanted you.”

“Well, you got me,” I grinned and leaned my head up slightly to finally press my lips onto his.

Once again, even without seeing him for a month and just being in communication with him through facetime, texts, and calls, this feeling hadn’t changed. My heart raced as our lips parted and I tasted his sweetness.

“We need to go back down,” I couldn’t believe it was me being the responsible one as I pulled my head back a bit.
“No, they’ll survive; they’re all grown men,” Sidney grumbled into my lips.

Sid pulled away quickly, clearly surprised at what he said himself.

“Yeah?” I grinned at him.

I gave him a quick peck before he could distract me again and darted into the bathroom to find a bandaid to make the story plausible. After putting it on one of his fingers, we left my room, holding hands until we made it to the stairs.

“Hey,” he pulled me to a stop at the top of the stairs pulling my hand up to his lips kissing my knuckles gently.

“Hey,” I breathed back giving him a small smile.

Sidney released my hand and we quickly descended the stairs, heading toward the kitchen. Only two of the guys were in there: Pascal Dupuis and Chris Kunitz both munching on a scones.

“Are you wearing a Batman bandaid?” Pascal asked grinning his eyes narrowing in on Sidney with hawklike precision.

“Batman is cool,” Sidney replied casually glancing down at his finger before returning his gaze to his teammate.

“I thought you liked Superman?” Chris asked with an innocent grin I didn’t buy for one second.

“People can change,” Sidney answered loftily as he picked up a scone on a tray.

Both Pascal and Chris stood with incredulous expressions on their faces staring at their captain.

“What?” Sidney grumbled.

Pascal moved first. He took the few steps to me and held his hand up as to give me a high five, “You are one incredible woman.”

I stared at him and then over to Sidney, completely confused.

“I told them,” Sidney confessed his voice distressed, “Well, I didn’t mean to tell them. Duper borrowed my phone and saw a picture of us so I had to tell him. And as I was telling him, Chris overheard us. I was going to tell you--”

“Oh,” I felt my chest constrict, I wasn’t sure how I felt about it. I mean, it was good for them to know about it, right? These guys were close to Sidney, they were his teammates.

“Don’t worry Lily,” That was Chris, “Obviously we are keeping this private for you two. We just like to rag on our captain.”

I nodded, with a tight smile. It was good right? To be telling others about us? I mean, our circle was getting bigger and that was okay. Maybe just not too big, not yet. I glanced around to make sure no one else was listening to us. There wasn’t anyone else in the kitchen. Actually, I couldn’t hear anyone else on this floor.

The house was too quiet. Much too quiet.

“Oh fuck,” I muttered, “The tramp is still up.”

I hightailed it out the back, onto the porch, down the steps, and saw the group of guys surrounding the area around the in-ground tramp, holding food and beers chatting and watching a very happy Beau jumping.

“Beau, your captain is going to kill me if you get hurt!” I whined as I skidded to a halt in front at the edge of the springs.

“But” jump “This” jump “Is” jump “So” jump “Fun!” Beau said beaming as he bounced.

“Then give someone else a try,” Borts whined sounding remarkably like a five year old.

I stared helplessly around the men who were all looking so excited to have their own turn. Where the hell was Jen? She was no where to be seen, that’s where.

“Lily!” Pauly’s excited voice distracted me.

I turned around and saw him looking up from his phone to me and back down at his phone and back at me.

“Yeah?” I was really hoping he was about to help me out.

“Please, please tell me you have ESPNU?” Paul’s voice was tight and pleading, his eyes doing the most puppy dog impression I had ever seen a 30 something year old man do before.

I frowned, thinking about the TV and the channels I had, “I think? I am not sure, I rarely use them. But you can for sure check.”

“The downstairs one?” Paul rushed. I realized that the sound of the trampoline had stopped, meaning that Beau had stopped jumping. Not only that, but Beau and Bort’s bickering had stopped as well as a lot of the conversations going on around us.

“Yeah, the basement one is best,” I answered wondering what was going on.

Paul cleared his throat, “Good, because it is almost 2 in Michigan.”

I could not have predicted the stampede that followed Paul’s announcement.

“BUCKEYES!” Beau bellowed as he tripped over himself and then Borts in order to get off of the tramp and

“What the fuck?” as I was left standing outside wondering what had gotten into the guys, “And I am pretty sure we don’t have any buckeyes?”

I followed them back into the house and made my way toward the basement.

As I plodded down the stairs, I felt an odd warm sensation despite the confusion. My house had been full of people before, full of my snowboarding friends. But these hockey nuts were a different breed. They spread out and were just so at ease all of the time. I smiled to some as I passed a couple of them hanging out in the kitchen munching on snacks as I ducked down the stairwell.

When I reached the bottom stair and glanced over at the couch, I started laughing so hard it brought tears to my eyes.

Just as I had thought about a few seconds ago, my couch had been used to couching 10 to 12 snowboarding or skiing sized people. We weren’t tiny but we weren’t huge, ranging from 5’3 to 5’10 and not more than 160 pounds. Myself being on the edge of that height and weight, though compact, because I was tall and focused in weight training more than the others. But seeing 9 giant hockey players all squeezed onto the couch--I took out my phone without hesitation and took a picture of the wriggling mass of limbs.

“I am about to kill all of your reputations” I gasped still laughing.

“LILY!” it was a unison roar.

“I just have to figure out how to Twit it,” I glared at my phone.

“I’ve got this,” Kris Letang was behind me said smirking. I wordless just handed him my phone grinning ear to ear.

“Tanger!!” the unison voices now were yelling.

I continued down the last couple of steps while he set up my phone.

“Now just type in what you want and just press tweet,” Kris pointed at a little blue button.

“Thanks!” I said as I took back my phone and typed in ‘Just at home with the @Penguins. But not sure if they are #penguins or #actualpuppies?’

“So what exactly are you watching?” I asked as slid onto the couch between Paul and Geno not caring that there wasn’t really space for me. Geno lifted his arm and tucked me under him. I snuggled into his side like I had so many times before.

“Who. Her name Victoria.” Geno supplied for me.

“Victoria McKinley,” Paul added figuring a first name probably wouldn’t help me very much.

“She’s a diver,” I said without thinking still looking at Geno. How did I know that?

Geno turned his head from the TV to look at me clearly surprised, “You know?”

“No. Well, just the name.” I shrugged as I turned my head to stare ahead at the screen aware the guys were paying attention to us. David had mentioned her over the summer right? And then that name that Beau and Borts had said in the club. Why was this person coming up so often?

“She is diving in this duel meet. Her school, OSU, versus Michigan State.” Paul explained.

“But then why isn’t she lined up right now?” Beau whined, “The pairs are up, and I want to see her and her cousin.”

“Wait, which is her cousin?” Borts chimed in.

“I don’t know. I’d be able to tell you if Tori was there,” Beau grumbled clearly annoyed before adding, “Pauuulie, are you sure this is the right channel?” as he wiggled into the couch.

“Tori isn’t diving in syncho today,” that was a new voice. It was Sid’s voice. He had come downstairs at some point after Tanger and myself. Instead of piling onto the couch with the rest of us, he pulled a chair up right behind Geno and myself. For some reason the input of information from him caused my heart to sink to my stomach, and to my dismay it kept dropping as he continued, “Her wrist has been bothering her. They have a big meet next weekend plus Nationals during the first week of December. Thus Tori made the smart decision and isn’t pushing her injury by doing both events.”

Now everyone was staring at Sidney.

“What?” he asked defensively lowering his beer instead of taking the sip he was about to take, “We talk and I pay attention.”

“Way to go Sidney,” I didn’t need to look around at James Neal to hear the smirk in his voice.

“Tori’s really cool,” Sidney retorted defensively. He was playing off the entire thing off very casually, “Anyways Bennett, had you and Bortuzzo actually showed up for the football game, both of you would know all of this.”

Both Bortz and Beau start squawking at Sidney as he victoriously took a sip of his beer. Football game? Had they run into this Tori at some Steelers game?

“But seriously Lily, Tori is awesome. She is so incredibly talented and smart. Except she is cheating on us with Chicago,” Beau says ‘Chicago’ like it’s some disgusting word that shouldn’t be uttered in pleasant company.

“Right loverboy, you are worried about Tori cheating on Pittsburgh with Chicago,” Bortz rolled his eyes.

“I know I don’t have a chance,” Beau replied mournfully instead of answering with a chirp.

“Sorry Sunshine,” James agreed, “And don’t feel bad about that. I think you’d have to be Canada’s Golden boy to have any chance with her.”

Everyone started laughing in the room.

Well, not everyone.

I tensed up immediately. As I did, I could feel Geno’s arm around me tighten and I heard an almost inaudible sharp intake of breath. And I could see a frown tug on Paul’s lips. And Marc wasn’t laughing nor was Kris Letang for some reason. I couldn’t see what Sidney did as he was behind me but I didn’t hear his laugh. Actually, there was quite a lot of tension in the room from that comment.

“But she not pick Chicago. Whole family is Pittsburgh,” Geno attempted to change the subject though I easily could recognize the tension in his voice, “Big family, very Poland.”

“Polish, G,” James corrected Geno, “But she is really down to earth though, makes you think.”

“Because you think,” Paul’s voice dripped with sarcasm.

“I think!” James chucks a pillow at Paul which causes everyone around us to erupt with laughter.

“CAREFUL!” Geno bellows, “Drinks!”

“There she is!” Beau cuts off everyone.

I glanced up at the screen. The volume bar was being turned up, probably Paul’s doing.

“--McKinley has taken on the roll of team captain once again this year for her senior year. Not really a surprise considering her Olympic pedigree. After a fifth place finish in Beijing in 2008, McKinley finished the 2012 London Olympics with a silver and a bronze--”

The camera is showing a girl, 20ish maybe 21, wearing red OSU Buckeye warm-ups. The screen zoomed to show a close up of her face. Her hair was maybe a light brown or blonde color, but it was impossible to tell because it was both up in a tight french braid and was wet. She had this stern look on her face, which was currently devoid of any make-up or piercings save a small nose stud. So this was Victoria.

Marc’s babble brought me out of my own thoughts and back to the present and I tilted my head back into his direction.

“--and offered to watch Estelle when she comes home for her Thanksgiving and again after her semester ends. Vero goes on and on about Tori. Apparently Estelle is in love with her after just seeing her after that one game.”

“Catherine adores her as well,” Kris said from next to Marc. I felt my heart sink deeper.

“She drink vodka,” my head whipped around to the man directly on my right and my jaw seemed to drop wider.

The rest of the guys fell into their own conversations as they watched a diver go. I remained silent, not really watching the screen.

Who was this woman?

The WAGs all loved her already? I mean, I had pretty limited contact with the majority of women who ran everything, but I thought I was on decently friendly terms with the women. I don’t think you could say any of them loved me. Vero and I were close, most certainly, but to say that strong? And even though I brought gifts for Estelle everytime I came back to the ‘Burgh, every single time I held her, she would cry. It took me a long time to create bonds and babies apparently didn’t like me.

The team was apparently quite fond of her. I thought I had made a lot of progress with these guys. I know I wasn’t able to be there all the time, and I know that I wasn’t the best at keeping in touch with everyone. But I was doing the best that I could. I was trying to open up the most I could.

And Geno knew her drink preferences? And of fucking course she drank vodka. Clearly Geno found a new friend. A friend who was in Pittsburgh, or at least close to it, and he could depend on to support him when he needed someone. And in turn, she had clearly opened up to him about things; probably about everything instantly. This Victoria was normal and could support him in ways he needed that I couldn’t or something.

And Sidney. The way his eyes lit up. The way he talked about her. Sidney didn’t talk about other girls. Hell, Sidney didn’t have other friends outside of hockey. He barely even talks about the WAGS ever, even Vero. And here he was knowing detailed information about this person’s injury and her events.

This Victoria McKinley.

I felt sick again.

‘You are fucking over thinking this entire situation. Why would Sidney have told Chris and Pascal about you two if he was interested in this other girl?’ another part of my brain tried to reason, ‘And how the hell would he have time for someone else? Seriously, when he isn’t texting or talking with you, he is at practice.’

I had to do something with my hands and I had to not look at the screen with these divers. So instead I became fascinated with this twitter application that I tended to avoid. Looking at the newsfeed, I started to scroll down reading things that friends I followed had posted recently.

There was a picture I almost scrolled past. I slowly tapped on it. The caption James had posted with it read “Looks like the Captain is finally learning how to interact with real humans. #ManOrMachine? #IWantToBeARealBoy”. The caption didn’t faze me; I was used to all of the chirps James could bring no matter the topic.

But the picture. Sidney was in pair of jeans and a dark sweater with his normal hat was pushed back so his face was perfectly clear in the photo. He, he looked completely at ease in mid laugh, his arm slung over the back of the girl’s chair he was sitting next to in the picture and her hand resting comfortably on his knee. And the girl, also in mid laugh, was breathtaking. It was definitely Victoria, but this must be Victoria away from the pool. Her hair, now clearly a dirty blondish brown color was impeccably straight. The simple black dress she wore was professional looking yet not aging and was brought all together by a pair of red heels. She looked completely in her element all while being open and friendly. And Geno and Paul. They were there too in the background looking just as happy and relaxed.

“Excuse me,” I muttered as I hauled myself out of my position on the couch, bumping into Geno or Paul, I wasn’t sure, and hurried upstairs wanting to be as far away from the guys as possible.

I wrenched the door to the bathroom open and flung myself to the toilet, barely making it in time to throw up.

---

“If you want to go put that in the wash, I can go grab you one of Geno’s shirts from upstairs,” I laughed at James, “It’s just down that hall and on the right side.”
James grumbled something unintelligible, but I took it for a yes so I quickly headed upstairs to find something clean for James.

After my vomiting incident, I had been regulated to the outskirts of the kitchen. Under strict orders, I wasn’t allowed to do any of the cooking from this point on just as a pre-cation. Jen argued on for me that if anyone could catch what I had, she would have already. I didn’t protest too much because multiple members of the team seemed to want to have some best griller cook off. I sipped on some ginger ale for my queasy stomach watching Pascal Dupuis and Chris Kunitz bicker about the temperature the grill should be set at until James came up with his shirt drenched in beer. I rolled my eyes not asking.

I hurried upstairs and quickly found one of Geno’s shirts, making sure several times it was 71 and not 87 before coming back downstairs.

“James, I think it might be a little--” I stopped once I got to the washroom and froze.

James was standing in the laundry room without his shirt on. But that wasn’t the problem; he was there holding a very specific lime green bra of mine, with a very curious expression on his face. The very bra I hadn’t bothered to bring upstairs when I first ditched my suitcase in the washroom just hours prior.

“Oh fuck.” I breathed before I could stop myself.

James looked up from the bra with a puzzled look on his face. He was thinking really hard, trying to figure something out. That something I knew exactly what. But I was going to play really, really dumb.

“James, it’s pretty creepy how you’re feeling up my bra there,” I tried to pass it off as nonchalantly as possible.

“No,” he gasped, “No fucking way.”

I stared down at the ground, my voice was robotic “What are you talking about?”

“I know this bra.” he insisted glancing from me to the bra.

“You know that bra? What did you take it off someone before?” I snorted trying to pass off anything other than guilt or confession, as I forced myself to look up at him.

“Nope,” I could hear the smugness in James damn Neal’s voice, “I’m just sure that I’ve seen it before.”

I shrugged, “Probably, it’s Victoria Secret. Very popular you know.”

“What?”

I stood there blinking slowly trying to keep my composure, “Uh, Victoria Secret? It’s a lingerie store?”

“I know what it is,” he whined as he looked at the bra, “Those stores are everywhere.”
“Yup,” I confirmed nodding.

“Well, thanks for this,” James looked quite disappointed as he pulled on Geno’s shirt over his head.

“No problem,” I muttered as I stared down at the ground feeling even more wretched than I had previously.

---

“I swear on my first born child he will be back at the hotel prior to the team bus leaving for practice,” I said with the straightest, most sincere face I could muster as I held up my right hand.
I honestly had no clue why the team was allowing this, but I wasn’t going to question my good fortune. Really, I think management or the coaches thought I would just come and kidnap him during the night anyways, so the team might as well sanction it. I had to promise that he would be returned before the bus left for their morning skate as well as that he made it to a 10 pm bedtime.

“He’s just mad that I am staying here with you and he isn’t,” Geno came up behind me wrapping his arms around me as he murmured this in my ear.

My eyes flickered over to Sidney who did in fact have a very odd expression on his face he couldn’t quite hide from me. I know I had promised to be better about not running to Geno all of the time, but Geno was a brother to me. Actually, thinking about it, Geno probably said something to that effect to get permission for him to stay over tonight. And Geno had worked on being able to stay over with me since September.

“Right, see you both tomorrow,” Sidney replied stepping into the bus.

“You could have asked for Sid to stay too,” Geno teased as he rested his chin on my shoulder.

“Because that gone over good,” I sighed.

“That would have gone over well,” Geno corrected me in a singsong voice as we watched the bus follow Jen out of the driveway.

“So, what is the plan?”

“You get to help me with clean up,” I grinned as I tilted my head at him.

Cleaning wasn’t that bad; the guys had been pretty good about picking up after themselves and the dishes weren’t too terrible. Geno mostly babbled about the team as I listened carefully as to be able to remember every detail in my quest to be a better friend.

“I do have a surprise,” I finally admitted once we finished neatening up the house.

“I don’t need any gifts,” Geno pouted.

“No, no.” I shook my head. I opened the fridge and started pulling out the beets and cabbage which had been shoved way in the back. Clearly, the predominantly Canadian and American population that had been through the house had no appreciation for these two vegetables. Not like--

“YOU’RE MAKING BORSCH?” Geno roared excitedly jumping up and down like a little kid as he saw what I was pulling out of the fridge.

I didn’t say a word, just grinned at my friend.

“But you shouldn’t make even more food on my account. We can just eat all the leftovers.” Geno’s smile falter a bit as his good manners kicked in.

“Nah. I’ve desperately craved your mom’s cooking lately,” I smiled at him before rolling my eyes, “Plus, Jen picked up a jar of mayonnaise, which will totally go to waste unless you use it. We both know I won’t ever touch that stuff.”

“I love you Lily,” I felt his arms around me in an instant.

I slid the cabbage and beets down onto the counter behind him so my hands could be free as to be able to hug him back.

“I know,” I sighed feeling comfortable.

Geno hugs were the best.

My heart sank in an instant. It went down past my lungs before shooting below my stomach and dropping to the floor.

Geno’s hugs weren’t the best. Not anymore.

“What’s wrong?” Geno asked instinctually knowing something had changed.

“Nothing.” I retorted a little too quickly.

“Tell me,” Geno shook me slightly as if that could get me to talk.

I made a face, “Let’s get this going?”

Directing him with the simple tasking of chopping, I set to work with everything else including on figuring out what I wanted to say though knowing I was going to avoid this conversation.

---

“Hi,” I smiled brilliantly, “Tickets to pick up under Crosby.”
“Lily?” I heard Jen behind me. Like the time before, I had planned to meet Jen at Pepsi Center.

“What--” Jen looked me up and down.

“What?” I tried out innocently, “I may have straightened my hair.”

“Uh, yeah?” Jen was still looking at me expectantly for an explanation.

“And I might have gone on youtube for some make up tutorials,” I shrugged.

Jen snorted.

“Okay, and I pulled out the Armani jeans from the back of the closet. And I may be actually wearing jewelry I didn’t get from a pack.” I admitted sighing.

Frankly, I looked incredible. I had taken a ridiculous amount of time to get ready. My hair was so shiny and straight it was all I could do to not keep touching it. As for my makeup, several of the videos had suggested to keep it natural, have it enhance my features or whatever. Between the how-tos and all the times I had been professionally done up, I pulled some semblance together. Plus I decided to squeeze into the jeans that did wonders to show off my legs and ass. And of course, tonight I was proudly wearing one of my many Malkin Jerseys. That and I was actually wearing earrings and a ring Geno had giving me over various occasions.

“Um, hot WAG Alert,” Jen teased giving me the obvious check out.

I rolled my eyes after I looked around to make sure no one had heard her, “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

Jen shoots me a look that says ‘You even want to attempt to try that with me?”

“I just felt like, putting some effort in,” I scowled.

“And you really think Sid cares?”

I bit my lip. Sidney and I had only texted a couple of times since the team had left the house yesterday. It wasn’t that the texts actually said that anything was wrong between us, there was just a lot not being said between the words. Maybe it was Geno staying over or maybe it was him thinking about this Victoria. I wasn’t sure.

But whatever was going on, I knew I could put forth effort on my side to show Sidney that I could adhere to whatever WAG codes there were. Not only adhere but blow them out of the water.

We headed down towards the ice, quickly realizing the seats were the same that we had months ago, for that Columbus vs Avalanche game.

That and those two girls were already sitting there.

“I am going to need a beer,” Jen muttered when she saw Teen 1 and Teen 2, “Or several. I would get you one, but.....”

Jen didn’t need to finish her sentence, so she didn’t and I gave her a little mini wave as she headed away to find alcohol.

I smiled over at the girls who both seemed to be blushing and wide eyed again.

“What-what-who-?” A voice yelled at me.

I turned around and saw Geno looking at me from the other side of the ice. I gave him a small wave and a grin.

“Who are you and what did you do with Lily?” he yelled in Russian.

“I am not dignifying you with an answer,” I yelled back in his language, though I didn’t know how to say dignifying, so I kept that in English.

“You know you are here for a hockey game, right?” he chirped at me grinning.

I scowled at the Russian, before a slow smiled spread across my face before I could stop it.

“Which is why I am wearing what I am. Especially the shirt with different name under the jersey,” I finally answered slowly and clearly to him.

“Are you wearing Crosby under that?!” Geno yelled back at me in his angriest Russian voice.

I nodded, smirking.

Geno skated off yelling Russian expletives leaving me to giggle to myself. I watched as I saw Geno skate into Sidney a little harder than he needed to. Sidney looked confused as Geno grumbled something to him and he looked over to me and looked back to Geno.

I sat there shrugging innocently.

---

Geno was the last one out of the locker room, but tonight I was grateful for his pokiness.
Paul had come out and had waited around with Jen and I, though he was soon followed by Fleury. Sidney came out sooner than I had expected as well. He was always one of the last ones out; he felt as captain it was his duty to give interviews whether they lost or won. Tonight they had won. He was standing next to me, and while we were all just making small talk, it felt good. It felt normal.

Finally Geno came out and our group began to make its way through the halls of the Pepsi Center towards where the bus was waiting to take all of the guys to the airport. The hallways were pretty deserted considering how late it was.

Quickly, I took a step in towards Sid breaking the normal in-public-distance we kept.

“Hey,” I said softly to Sid as we fall slightly behind the group. Sidney was high off of the win, so I was most certainly taking advantage. But I didn’t care; I was going to be selfish.

“You know something I would never ever do with G?” my voice was soft as I looked into his eyes.

He looked confused, “No?”

It was too easy.

Too easy in these heels. Too easy to press my lips to his. Too easy to run my tongue along those lips that I knew as well as my own. It was just getting too easy with him.

“Sorry,” I muttered as I pulled away feeling myself blush.

Sidney stopped me from pulling back any further. He glanced one way then the other before pulling me back in.

The hooting and hollering coming from the guys and Jen finally caused us to pull apart.

“I am very glad you wouldn’t do that with Geno,” Sidney replied almost stupidly, “In fact, I would much prefer you never come close to doing that with anyone else.”

I pretended to mull over what he just said.

“Hey.” Sid’s voice was slightly alarmed.

I pressed my lips against his in one of those kisses he was so good at, the one that promised a million more.

“So I should plan on bringing more stuff to leave in December,” the words I spoke came out as a fact instead of the question I meant them to form.

Sidney got this goofy expression on his face as he looked at me. He quickly looked up and down the hall before he smugly looked over at our group who were all waiting for us at a pair of doors.

“I am about to kiss my girlfriend. So if it bothers you, you may want to avert your gaze,” Sid declared.

“Sidney Pat-” My squeal was subsequently cut off but I wasn’t about to complain.

This time our peanut crowd was silent.

My lips were properly swollen from Sidney when we parted this time and I felt slightly light headed as he took a step back.

“Oh mon dieu,” I heard Fleury mutter.

“Well, I need a cold shower,” that was definitely Jen, while Geno was muttering something too low and in Russian I couldn’t quite catch.

“We maybe should start behaving for the kids,” I jerked my head toward our friends unable to keep the grin off of my face.

Sid nodded, letting go of my hand and took the step away from me to allow our normal public distance we allowed between ourselves.

My smile faded.

Sidney and I were silent as we caught up to the group and we headed out toward the bus.

“You came to say bye! I am so touched!” James yelled as he bounded off of the bus when he saw us.

“Of course,” I smiled.

There were many goodbyes to say. I didn’t understand why it was getting harder to do this, shouldn’t it be getting easier? I mean, it was becoming a repetitive practice.

“See you all in December,” it didn’t sound like my voice as I called after the guys as they loaded onto the bus.

I waved at the tinted windows with one of my hands as I hugged myself with my other.

An arm slipped around my back, “You’ll see him soon.”

For some reason I couldn’t answer. Jen squeezed slightly, clearly worried. We just stood there staring at the bus. It wasn’t moving, just sitting there. Probably they were doing a final count to make sure a Russian was actually on the bus. I wanted the Russian to stay of course. But I really wanted a certain Canadian to stay.

“Could I stay at yours tonight?” I asked as we watched the bus finally made a hissing noise and started pulling away.

The snarky response I was expecting didn’t come. Instead, Jen’s arm just tightened around my waist and I felt her head tilt onto my shoulder. That response I took as a yes.

Notes

Friends, hi.



If any of you readers are from Ottawa, please stay safe. My thoughts and prayers are with you.