Just You and Me, Kid

The morning of Finn’s visit, Kasperi texted his parents that he was going to meet him. He wasn’t sure why, but he thought that might be something they’d want to know. His dad replied with some encouraging words, but his mom’s reply made him think, and eventually sent him to the doctor’s office.

It reminded him a lot of getting paternity tested, except he wasn’t in Hannah’s kitchen, and this was an actually doctor performing the test. He held his mouth open while they took a swab of the inside of his cheek, and just like at the dentists, the doctor had to ask him questions while his mouth was open.

“Ah-huh,” he tried answering affirmatively.

“So, no, you do want to get checked for other genetic disorders?” The doctor asked, and Kasperi shook his head. The nurse finally removed the swab from his mouth and put it in a tube to to be taken to the lab.

“No, that’s the only one I’m concerned about.” Kasperi corrected him. “My grandfather had it, and my mom thinks I could be a carrier, since she was.”

“It’s not likely you are, but it’s very proactive of you to come in and get checked out.” The doctor smiled at him from over his clipboard. “We’ll have the results in a few weeks.”

The nurse showed him back out to the empty waiting room. He had made the appointment last minute and this was the earliest he could get. The sooner he had it down, the sooner he would know.

He took a deep breath and tried to calm himself down as he drove to Hannah and Olli’s. The last thing he needed was to be nervous, with shaky unstable hands. ‘I’m going to drop him,’ he thought as he parked in their driveway. ‘I just know it.’

Hannah was about to go to bed when Kasperi got there. She was in her pajamas, getting a glass of water from the kitchen. She gave him a pitying look. “He’s upstairs in the nursery with Olli.”

“And Beth?” He asked. He had been expecting to have this moment ruined by her presence; her not letting him hold Finn, or freaking out about something, as usual.

Hannah rolled her eyes. “Who knows. She went out with Catherine hours ago to go shopping, but she definitely should have been back by now.”

Kasperi nodded, secretly elated that Beth would not be around to bother him. Hannah led him upstairs to the nursery and turned on the light. Olli had fallen asleep in the rocking chair holding Finn and woke up with a start when they came in.

“Oh, hey.” He said as he stood up. “He’s asleep, he’s been changed recently, and I think he got a bottle an hour ago.”

Kasperi reached out and slowly took the little bundle from Olli. He had been so worried about dropping him, breaking him, not being able to hold him right. But he fit into his arms like they were made to hold him. His tiny head nestled into his elbow perfectly, and arms wrapped around the rest of him and held him close to his chest.

“We’ll leave you two alone. And stay as long as you want,” Hannah added before she and Olli left for bed.”

Kasperi slipped into the rocking chair and slowly tipped back and forth. Now that he was alone, he was able to look at Finn more closely. He blinked his eyes as he woke up and Kasperi smiled at the similarities between their eyes. Finn’s were a little greener, but they had the same shape. What else would he take after him? Would he grow up to play hockey? Or be a psycho like his mom? Kasperi didn’t know; he had no idea what Finn’s future held, because as of now, it was up to Beth.

Kasperi shook that thought away; he didn’t need any negativity clouding his head in this perfect moment. You only get to meet someone for the first time once, and while Finn wouldn’t remember this, Kasperi would cherish this memory for the rest of his life. He held his son close and leaned back in the chair, letting the rocking motion lull him to sleep.

Kasperi awoke to the jarring sound of a baby crying and realized he had fallen asleep with his son in his arms. He rocked the baby a little, trying to figure out what he wanted. ‘You’re probably hungry,’ he thought, and carried Finn downstairs to the kitchen to warm up a bottle. As he was feeding Finn he heard the front door open. His heart froze for a minute when he realized this might be Beth returning.

“Oh, hey. I see you’ve met our son,” she slurred and staggered into the kitchen. Beth leaned on the edge of the counter to keep from falling over and smiled vindictively at Kasperi.

“Are you okay?” Kasperi asked, instinctively holding Finn closer to his chest. Who knew what Beth would do in a state like this.

“What are you talking about? I’m fine. I was just out with the girls, catching up.” She slumped onto one of the barstools and leaned across the counter, resting her face on the cool granite countertop. Her head was spinning, mostly from drinking, but now she felt her world falling apart for a new reason. Kasperi looked great with the baby, much more natural than she ever had. It had been months and she still hadn’t worked out the best way to hold him while feeding him a bottle, and here Kasperi was, not hours after meeting Finn, feeding him like a pro. The little threads that were holding the pieces of Beth together were slowly coming undone, and she started sobbing. Her makeup ran down her face, but she didn’t care any more.

“Why don’t we get you upstairs, okay?” Kasperi tried to comfort her while balancing Finn, and eventually put the bottle down. Beth started to stand up, but was too wobbly to walk on her own. He reached out to help her, but couldn’t because he had to use both arms to hold Finn.

“Just put him down, he can’t go anywhere,” she slurred.

“I’m not putting him on the floor,” Kasperi replied. “Stay here, I’ll be right back.” He quickly rushed upstairs to put Finn in his crib, and returned to find Beth sitting on the floor. He helped her up and practically carried her upstairs. He found the guest bedroom she was staying in- the same one he’d stayed in when he visited for prospect camp this summer- and took off her shoes before putting her to bed.

After a rough first night, he was not looking forward to talking to Beth about important things, like custody, and visitation. He returned to the nursery and put Finn to bed, kissing him goodnight before reluctantly leaving. He had a game tomorrow and needed to get to sleep.

He was anxious before the game, but he pushed all thoughts of Beth aside by the time the puck dropped. He hadn’t noticed her during warmups, but when they came back on the ice for the second period, he couldn’t miss Beth leaning on the glass wearing his jersey and probably not much else. He tried not to let her get to him, but he missed a few passes, had a couple of turnovers, and ended up in the penalty box too many times.

‘Why does she have to be like this?’ He thought and slammed his stick into the door of the penalty box during his last visit. Because the Pens were killing a penalty in the last three minutes they lost their one point lead. The game looked like it was going into overtime when Kapanen exited the box and took a pass from Kunitz, but he missed the puck and it went right to Seguin. Tyler plowed right through the tired Penguins defenders and shot it passed Flower for the win.

The team angrily made their way back to the locker room where Coach Johnston had some words for them. Kasperi was eager to get out of there and changed and showered as fast as he could, not stopping to talk to any of his teammates. He felt responsible for the loss and just wanted to get out of there.

But Beth was waiting for him as he left Consol. She leaned up against the the wall and let her hair fall across her face a bit. She looked up when she heard him coming, and pretended to be surprised to see him.

“Kas-” She started.

“Why do you do this?” He interrupted her. He was mad, and not afraid of making her upset. “Why would you come to a game dressed like this?”

“What? I can wear whomever’s jersey I want.” She lifted her eyebrows and pretended to be hurt by his comment.

“For God’s sake put some pants on,” he said quieter. “High heels and a hockey jersey is not an outfit, especially for a mom.”

“I’m wearing more than that,” she flirted, but Kasperi wasn’t having any of it.

“Go find your sister, and go home. I’ll talk to you tomorrow after practice.” He left and ignored her calling after him. He was past caring about her, and knew she was capable of getting home without his help. Whatever she had been attempting to do tonight had obviously failed.

Notes

Thank you for reading!