I Wish I Could Break Your Heart
The front door slams, the glass in the middle shakes with the reverberation of it, Michaela watches sure the glass is going to shatter on the floor. It would make sense, the girl with the broken heart having the door break too. But it doesn’t because unlike her the door can’t feel the weight of his words.
It was stupid of her to plan that party, Pekka hated surprises, she knew that and yet she thought for sure he would love having his family together for his birthday and she was wrong. As soon as they got home he started yelling about having his parents staying in a hotel, and somehow a simple birthday party got turned into her obviously lying about their relationship and her looking like the bad guy. She was sick of it, but he only lashed out when he was under stress and the looming playoffs was enough that Michaela should have known he was a short fuse.
That was no excuse though and she wasn’t one for making excuses, they didn’t fight often as bad as scene they just made played it out to be. She knew she was over sensitive, she told everyone she met she was, but it was only made worse by the fact that Pekka was a typical man, communicating with nods and shrugs, which made Michaela anxious and paranoid that he would leave her. She planned a surprise party for him because they rarely ever could get his whole family into town to celebrate on his actual birthday and this was a free weekend, but he had a bad game a few days ago and was still stewing on it, and to add insult to injury he’d had a sinus infection all day.
There she went rationalizing the entire thing again; as if that would make it so she understood their fight instead of just being mad about it. For once she wanted to be the one to leave, maybe give him a taste of his own medicine. If she could she would go back in time, turn him down when he asked her out the first time, or better yet lead him on, and the moment she had him hooked just up and leave. Just so he hurt, for once he’d have the broken heart. But she couldn’t do that. In her heart of hearts she knows there’s no one she’d rather be with than him, and she wouldn’t be able to access enough anger to ever break his heart. Their relationship wasn’t bad; it was just lacking communication skills.
She came up with a plan; she sat on the couch, a duffel bag next to her. In it was just a couple outfits so the bag wouldn’t look empty. When the door opened she met him there.
“What’s that for?” he asks pointing at the bag
“Clearly you don’t want me here so I’m leaving. I wanted to tell you in person” she says quietly looking between the bag and he shoes.
“No” he says sharply and her eyes snap to meet his panicked looking ones “Don’t do that, don’t leave me. I was coming home to say sorry, I was childish that entire argument was childish I don’t know how we got so off topic or why I even started in the first place I’m sorry Michaela, please don’t leave”
“Why should I stay? This happens every time and when you storm out the door or we fight I’m the one left with a broken heart while you’re fine. Pekka I don’t see a reason to stay” she says part of her believing what she is saying while the rest of her rejoicing in her act.
“Because it would break me if you left” he says sincerity in his voice and she gasps slightly
“No, it wouldn’t, it never does. I wish I could break your heart but I can’t, you don’t let me in enough for me to take any piece of you with me out that door” she says feeling agitation stirring
“No you wouldn’t take a piece; you’d walk out the door with my entire heart. Please we can do counseling, anything you want please”
“Pekka, I’m not leaving, I just needed to know where I stood with you, because you don’t talk to me. I couldn’t do that to you, even if I wanted to” she says with a small smile
“Don’t ever scare me like that again love” he says kissing her deeply “I love you too damn much”
“I love you too” she mumbles against his lips.
Song I Wish I Could Break Your Heart Cassadee Pope, requested by @divergent_spn35. Hope you enjoy it!