Stockholm Syndrome

I got home with a silver medal in slopestyle. Although I didn’t win a gold medal, I was still really proud of myself. I head downstairs to the den where Sid is watching TV.

“I hope you didn’t have any plans tonight,” he says to me.

“I didn’t. Why?” I ask hesitantly

“I told Kuni we’d babysit for him.” I had never really babysat before. I didn’t know how good I’d be at it.

“Okay. Why not,” I reply. We drive the Kunitz’s and knock on the door. Chris answers holding a baby and I hear a loud TV in the background.

“Come in,” he tells us. We walk in a small girl who looks about three walks towards us and hides behind her dad’s legs.

“This is Payton,” Chris says gesturing to the girl. “And this is Aubrey,” he says looking down at the baby. “Hey Zach look who’s here,” Chris calls out.
A young boy comes running into the foyer. “Zach this is Phoenix. And you know Sidney.” Zach says hi and I smile. Maureen comes downstairs in a black dress and heels.

“You look amazing,” I tell her.

“Oh Phoenix you’re too kind. We’re just going out for supper so we shouldn’t be too long. Aubrey is an easy baby. There’s bottles in the fridge for her and Zach and Payton already ate and they usually go to bed around 8.” I nod my head, processing all the information.

“You guys have our numbers. Feel free to call if you have any questions. Thanks so much for doing this,” she says smiling. Chris hands me the baby and they leave and me and Sidney are left standing there awkwardly with Zach and Payton.

“What were you guy’s doing before we got here?” I ask.

“We were colouring. Do you want to see?” Zach asks. I nod and follow him to the kitchen table. He shows me the lion king picture he was colouring.

“Very cool. Payton, what did you colour?” I ask her. She doesn’t say anything but holds up a picture of Cinderella.

“That’s really nice,” I tell her. She sits down and continues colouring. Sidney sits beside Zach and begins colouring with him.

“Sidney do you like Lion King?” Zach asks.

“I love Lion King. Simba is my favourite,” Sidney replies. Aubrey starts crying and I start panicking a little. I bounce her up and down and she soon stops.

“Payton who’s you’re favourite Disney princess?” I ask her.

“Cinderella,” she says quietly. As the evening went on I could tell Payton was becoming more comfortable with us. She was talking and laughing and was starting to enjoy herself. Before bedtime we decided to watch Finding Nemo. Zach knew most of the words and I was happy the movie was entertaining them. 8 o’clock came and me and Sidney decided to split up. I got Payton ready for bed and read her a story.

“Are you guy’s going to come back?” she asks in the middle of the story.

“Do you want us to?” I ask. She nods her head and smiles.

“Then of course we’ll be back. She hugs me and I smile. I continue reading and she soon falls asleep. I quietly leave her room and head downstairs where Sidney is sitting on the couch holding Aubrey with a bottle.

“Not too shabby Crosby. Two kids in bed and one quiet,” I say impressed.

“You’re good with them,” he replies. I put my head on his shoulder and we finish watching the rest of the movie. The movie ends and I get up to put it away. I look at Sidney and his head is back and his eyes are closed with Aubrey sleeping quietly in his arms. My heart warms at the sight and I suddenly feel myself having empty womb syndrome. I shake the thought from my head when I hear the front door open. Chris and Maureen come into the living room and they both smile when they see Sidney.
“Sidney wake up,” I say softly. He stirs before opening his eyes and realizes where he is.

“Oh I fell asleep. Sorry,” he says groggily. He hands Aubrey to Maureen and gets up.

“How were they?” Chris asks.

“They were awesome. They listen so well. We had a lot of fun,” I reply.

“Are you sure you’re talking about my kids?” Chris laughs. We head towards the door and put our coats on.

“Thanks again. It was so nice to get out,” Maureen says.

“Anytime. If you ever need a babysitter you know who to call,” I reply. We head home exhausted and I look at Sidney.

“You’re really good with kids,” I tell him.

“I like kids,” he replies. I pictured a little Sidney running around and I laugh to myself. I wasn’t sure what the future held but I was open to anything.

A couple weeks later I had arrived in Aspen for X games. X games was always my favourite competition and it was the competition I always did really well at it. My goal was to at least medal in halfpipe. I qualified third in semi finals and I was able to land my double cork. I headed into finals feeling confident. Then sun was out and the pipe was perfect. I had no excuses not to do well. I do my first run and I land in fifth place. I wasn’t going to settle for fifth anymore. I was going to need to step it up a notch. I get to the top and find Coach.

“Back to back double corks. I’m doing it,” I tell him.

“You’ve never done them back to back before. Your best bet is to stick with the run we talked about,” he replies.

“Do you honestly believe I’m the best snowboarder you’ve seen?”

“Yes.”

“Then let me prove it.” He doesn’t say anything so I get ready to drop in. My body is rushing with adrenaline and I’m shaking. I get the nod and head towards the pipe. I drop in and pulled a front side air which led to Backside 900 Melon, followed by a frontside 1080 stalefish into a cab double cork 1080 stalefish, to frontside double cork. I landed the run and I lift my hands in the air. I can’t believe I was able to put it down. I anxiously await my score. The bar had been set high but I knew that only a select few riders had back-to-back double corks. I get a 97.60 and I throw my snowboard. First place. I’m in total shock and my head is spinning. I wait at the bottom while I wait for the last rider to go. Shaun. He was probably going to knock me into second but I didn’t care. I medalled either way. Shaun drops in and lays down some solid tricks. He gets up and tries to pull the double mctwist but comes down awkwardly and falls forward, using his hands to keep from completely falling. He comes and stands near me and waits for his score. A 79.80 flashes on the screen which will keep him in second place. He turns to look at me and smiles.

“First place, how does it feel?!” he asks. He hugs me and I’m still in shock. Leah comes up to me with her microphone.

“Phoenix you have just won the men’s halfpipe contest. How does it feel?” she asks.

“I’m kind of stunned right now actually,” I tell her,

“Those back to back double corks were pretty amazing. That’s the first we’ve seen you do them in competition. Did you have that planned?”

“No actually. That was a spur of the moment decision. I had never done them back to back before so I’m glad it worked out.”

“Well Phoenix, go celebrate you deserve it.” I pick up my board and make my way through the crowd. I had just won. I had beaten Shaun. I had to be dreaming. There was no way this was real. I headed to the webcast booth where Jack and Brandon were waiting for me.

“There she is! A legend in the making! Phoenix Crosby everyone!” Jack yells out. I put the headset on and sit on the couch.

“Hey guys thanks for having me,” I reply.

“Phoenix that was incredible. How are you feeling?” Brandon asks.

“Honestly I still think I’m in shock.”

“Where did the back to back double cork come from,” Jack asks bewildered.

“I’ve never done them back to back before until today so I definitely had luck on my side.”

“That was pure talent. You should of seen Jack. He threw his headset across the room,” Brandon laughs. I look at Jack and he smiles proudly. We answer a few fan questions and then I leave to get ready for slopestyle semi’s.

I was back in Pittsburgh a week later still basking in my recent wins. I had put down two solid runs in slopestyle earning me gold. My phone goes off for the hundredth time that day so I turn it to silent. We were driving home from the airport and I was starving.

“We should stop somewhere to eat,” I tell Sidney.

“I can make you something at home,” he says quickly.

“Why don’t you want to eat out?” I ask suspiciously.

“It’s been a long day. Let’s get you home and unpacked then maybe we can go out.” I decide to not push the subject and stay silent for the rest of the ride. We pull into the driveway and I hop out of the vehicle. Sidney grabs my suitcase and snowboard and I walk in the front door.

“SURPRISE!” I hear a chorus of people yell. I look around and the entire team and the wags are all here. I stand there stunned until Geno comes up and hugs me.

“Best snowboarder in world!” he says proudly. I turn to Sidney and he just shrugs. Carl comes up next and hugs me.

“Congrats sis. I always knew you could do it,” he says smiling. I group hug Beau, Brandon, James, Paul and Bortz and then I go and say hi to all the wives and girlfriends. There’s food everywhere and a homemade banner that says ‘Phoenix is the best’. I get a drink and start clinking my fork to it. Everyone turns their attention to me and I smile.

“I just wanted to say thank-you so much to everyone who’s here today and thank you so much for supporting me. My family may be back in Sweden but I consider you all family and I’m very blessed to have you in my life. Cheers!”

“To Phoenix!” Sidney says loudly.

“To Phoenix!” Everyone echoes. We all drink and I make my way to living room where the competition is playing on the TV.

“I can’t believe you beat Shaun White! You’re going to be the next Shaun White!” James exclaims.

“That’s kind of weird,” I laugh. I watch my run and I don’t even recognize myself. The rider on TV has such confidence and they’re pulling like these hard tricks like they do them everyday. I watch my reaction when I realize I’m in first place and I smile. You can see the happiness etched on my face. I head to the dining room where people are eating and I find Sidney sitting with Brandon, Bortz, Carl, Beau, Geno, Paul and James. I sit on Sidney’s lap and start eating his food.

“How do you guys do the long-distance thing? You’re both always travelling,” James asks. I was caught off guard by his question.

“With me and Anna. It hard,” Geno adds. Were they asking for relationship advice? Sidney and I had such a dysfunctional start to our relationship, I’m surprised people would ask for our advice.

“Technology helps. We text, call and facetime all the time,” Sidney says.

“And you know what they say, absence makes the sex that much hotter,” I smile.

“That’s not how that saying goes,” Carl says rolling his eyes. My phone starts to ring and I go to the other room to take it.

“Hello?” I answer.

“Hey kiddo, it’s dad. I just wanted to say congratulations! My little girl is the best snowboarder in the world!” he exclaims.

“Thanks dad but it was only one contest. It was probably a fluke.”

“I don’t believe that for a second. You pulled those hard tricks and you rode better than anyone else. Don’t underestimate yourself.”

“Thanks Dad.”

“Well I’ll let you go for now. I’m so proud of you kiddo. Bye for now.”

“Bye Dad.” I hung up and went to enjoy the rest of the party.


I had been in Pittsburgh for a couple of weeks and the Penguins were on quite the win streak. I was lonely without Natalia but was happy I had the other wags to do stuff with. I went out for lunch with Vero and Catherine regularly and started babysitting for both of them. I was getting more endorsement deals and everything seemed perfect. I wasn’t used to being this happy but I didn’t question it. Mine and Sidney’s relationship seemed unbreakable and I was in the best shape of my life. I was at Consol sitting with the other wags watching the penguins take on the Senators. The Penguins were down 4-1 late in the third. They scored on the power play cutting the lead down to two. The clock counted down and the penguins fell to the senators 4-2. Sidney seemed distracted during the game and didn’t register a single shot on goal. I chat with Vero for a bit before heading down towards the dressing room. I say hi to a few of the guys before Sidney comes out. I can feel the negative energy come out with him.

“You guys had a good push at the end,” I say sympathetically.

“Not good enough,” he replies bleakly.

“Okay well I guess I’ll meet you at home?” I ask. He doesn’t say anything so I turn around and start walking to the parking lot. I knew not to take it personally and that he’d be fine by the morning. I hop into my jeep and start heading the usual route home. I fiddle with the radio until I hear a song I like. I’m sitting at red light waiting for it to turn green. Finally it changes and I step on the gas. Out of nowhere a truck T-bones my vehicle causing it to roll. My vehicle finally stops moving and I’m upside down. My chest is crushed against the steering wheel and I can’t feel my right leg. I try to yell for help but the pain in my chest is excruciating. I feel blood start to run down my face and I lose consciousness.

Notes

oh no.