AAOOOSC! The Movie!

The next day, all of the Olympians are at their assigned tables according to their country.
Patrick is sitting with Jonathan at the American table, picking at his foriegn food. "What is this stuff, dude?"
Jonathan eats a cookie. "I dunno. Ask the cooks."
"I did, man. They said that they were not allowed to tell the ingredients because the goverenment says so, dude."
"Why don't you ask a Russian then?"
"Hm. Okay, man." Patrick gets up with his tray and walks over to the Russian table. "Hey, dudes."
All the Russians at the table turn to look at him.
"I have a question: What is in this food, man?" Patrick slightly raises up his tray.
No one answers him.
"Aw, come on, guys, please tell me! I want to know what I'm eating, dudes!"
"Я не знаю--вернуться к вашему столу, чувак," Evgeni tells him. (I don't know--go back to your table, dude.)
Patrick makes a confused look. "Huh?"
"Bob," Sergei tells Patrick.
"Bob?" Patrick repeats, still puzzled.
"Bob."
Geno turns to Sergei. "почему ты говоришь 'боб'?" (Why are you saying 'bob'?)
"Я говорю по-английски с ним," Sergei tells Evgeni. (I'm speaking English to him.)
"Ах, я получаю то, что вы говорите. Продолжить." (Ah, I get what you are saying. Continue.)
Sergei turns back to Patrick. "Bob."
"Can you speak English, man?"
"Bob."
"Ah, whatever, dudes, I'm outta here, man." Patrick walks away back to Jonathan.
"Хорошо говорить с вами, друг," Evgeni tells Patrick. (Good talking to you, friend.)
All the Russians laugh.
Patrick sits next to Jonathan with a sigh. "Nothing, dude. They're useless, man."
"Just eat it."
"No thanks, dude; I'd rather strave, man." Patrick looks around the caferiteria. "Hey, where are all the Canadians, dude?"
"I don't know. But I'm just glad that they're not near us; I don't feel like arguing with them." Jonathan drinks some water from his water bottle.
"They must be either still sleeping, eating somewhere else, or practicing early. Let's go look for them, man."
"Now why would we do--"
Before Jonathan could finish his question, Patrick grabs his wrist and drags him out of the restaurant.

Meanwhile at the Finnish table...
Teemu Selänne and Sami Vatanen are eating like ducks next to Kari.
Kari is full of crumbs and is still getting a shower of crumbs. "Ewww!!! Get these crumbs off of me!!!" He wipes the pieces of bread and crackers off of him, back on Teemu and Sami.
Teemu and Sami quack angerly at Kari and just shake more crumbs on Kari as revenge.
"That's it! I'm outta here!" Kari gets up and dusts the crumbs off of him. "Toodles, duckies!" He gets up with his tray and sits next to Antti.
Zdeno Chára walks over to Tuukka, who is minding his own business.
Tuukka looks up at Zdeno. "Hi, Zdeno."
Zdeno smiles at him. "I got a joke for you!"
Tuukka turns away from him with a worried look. "Uh-oh."
"Ha.ha.ha.ha. He.he.he.he. Tuukka's the Finnish that will get nothing."
"Tuukka doesn't like that. You get nothing."
"Ha. ha. ha. ha!" Zdeno walks over to Kari. "Ha.ha.ha.ha. He.he.he.he. Kari's the Finnish who don't like duckies."
"What about 'Kari's the Finnish that likes One Direction'?" Kari asks Zdeno.
"That doesn't rhyem."
"1D?"
"Ha.ha.ha.ha. He.he.he.he. Kari's the Finnish that likes the onesies!"
"NO!" Kari buries his head in his arms.
Zdeno laughs and walks over to Antti. "Ha.ha.ha.ha. He.he.he.he. Antti's the Finnish that knows everything!"
"Like that you're the captain of the Slovak team even though you're a defenseman and that you can speak seven languages."
"That's right!" Zdeno laughs then stops. "Okay, I'm done." He walks back to the Slovak table.

Notes